Fake Fan Fiction ❯ Portrait Without Sin ❯ Portrait Without Sin ( Chapter 10 )

Disclaimer: FAKE, nor any of it's characters belong to me…* sigh *… those rights all belong to Sanami Matoh.

Warning: Not your 'nice' everyday fanfic of your favorite couple. Very strong language / Humiliation (depending on how you look at it) / Angst / Lime, Lemon / Yaoi. Rating will tend to go up in later chapters.

Summary: How would it be if the one person you trusted with your heart was found to have betrayed it? Seeing him there, with… 'him' was nearly more than he could bare. He never thought that he would do something like this. He never thought that he would be betrayed by him.

Yes, the character's might seem a little out of character, but then how would you react?

Take above Warning seriously.

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Quotation marks "." = talking

Italics, apostrophe marks 'like this' = thoughts to oneself.

*********** = skips of moments, time, views of people, and such

Well, here is the awaited Chapter, to find out the big question. I truly hope that it's not a disappointment after such a huge build-up. Hope you're happy with it.

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Portrait Without Sin

By: Ryoan

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Part 10: Portrait Without Sin

Ryo wasn't at work the next morning. He hadn't wanted to face Dee the next day knowing what he must have been doing with his 'new' partner the night before. He wouldn't have been in any condition for work anyway; he hadn't slept that whole night -- falling asleep only at the dawning light.

But it wasn't just the next morning that he didn't show for work, it happened that he was gone the rest of the week too.

Dee sat at his desk, his thumb and forefinger were spread open, cradled against his face just above his upper lip as his elbow rested on the top of his desk. In his other hand, between two of his fingers, was a pencil that was obnoxiously tapping against the desk surface at a rapid pace. Green eyes stared unblinkingly straight ahead, lost in some vein of thought.

"Officer Laytner?" The soft sound of a male voice permeated the dark haired man consciousness, and broke him out of his wondering contemplation.

Dee looked up and saw a man of a medium-small build, with dark hair, blue eyes, and wire rimmed glasses. The clothing he wore were of a nice quality, and was cut and fitted to his form. He wasn't really that handsome, but he was far from being bad looking. It was that there was just something about him that gave his character a bit of quiet upper edge in both looks and poise.

"Yeah."

"May I have a word with you, please?"

Dee gave a wave of his hand at the chair next to his desk for the man to sit down, thinking it odd that his voice was vaguely familiar to him.

"Is there somewhere else… a little more private? It's of a personal matter."

"Unless you want to go down to the basement," Dee returned. "The conference room is being used, and I saw a birthday cake going into the lounge just a bit ago. And they don't like us having civ's in the locker room."

The man nodded slightly in understanding, and took the seat offered, adjusting the jacket he held folded over one arm. He gave a fleeting look about him, before turning his cobalt attention back to the officer.

Leaning back in his own seat, Dee folded his arms across his chest as he tried to decipher just why this well groomed man was so strikingly familiar, yet he could not place where he would know the person from.

"So, what's this about?"

"It's about a… umm… a friend."

"A friend, huh? You don't sound too sure about that."

"Well, he is… a friend. We're just…umm…"

Thinking the man was embarrassed to get found out he was having a relationship with another man, Dee blurted out, "Is he your boyfriend?"

"No." He said almost a little too quickly, and he looked away with a blushing tinge to his face.

"Ok." Noting the guy's reaction, Dee wasn't going to push it. Besides, the information he would gather to help the man with this problem would reveal answers soon enough anyway. Leaning forward, he flicked through some papers on his desk.

"Is he missing?"

"Well… umm… maybe… not in the way… you might say…"

Opening the bottom drawer of his desk, Dee flips through a few folders, then pulls out a sheet of paper from one of them.

"Well, he either is or he isn't. A person can't be partly missing. Is he in trouble or what?"

"I think that he is in need of your help."

Dee stilled his movements. The paper he was placing on the desk still remain partially lifted in his fingers.

"My help," Brows furrowed slightly, not understanding what this man was saying to him. "My help personally or professionally?"

"Personally." Then he said a bit quieter, "It's about Ryo."

Now he was starting to remember just who this guy was.

"I don't think he's doing very well." The soft spoken man continued.

"You should talk to someone else about him." Dee could feel the agitation starting to build with this man. "Ryo's not my concern anymore."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. Besides, you're his 'friend', why don't you see about him?" Instead of shoving the paper to the side, he unconsciously wadded the unused sheet up in his hand and tossed it into the waste can. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some real work to attend to."

With a scrapping drag upon the floor, Dee adjusted his chair in dismissal. Picking up his pencil, he acted as if he was occupied with the other papers laying there. The dark haired man that sat at the corner of his desk, just stared at him.

"You don't have any concern at all to want to know just how bad he is?"

"Is he in the hospital?"

"No."

"Then there isn't much for me to be concern about." He began the rhythmic tapping of his pencil again.

"But you have to go see him."

"I don't have to do anything where he's concerned." Dee sneered in return.

"I think he's… sinking into something that he might not get himself out of alone."

"Sounds like a personal problem. Call a doctor or psychiatrist then. Hell, go take care of him yourself. Seems you were doing a fine job that day I walked in on you."

"As much as I would like to have Ryo all to myself…"

"Well, what are you waiting for?" Turning narrowed, glittering eyes upon the man. His irritation for the man showed in his conduct, as he more than bluntly snarled, "He's been available to ass fuck for almost a couple of months now!"

Dee turned away from him, the pencil thumping all that much more.

The other man just stared at him, totally unprepared for the crass resistance of the officer.

"You are an idiot and a prick; with a capital 'I' and a capital 'P'."

Dee was rendered speechless for a moment as his movements became still. He was surprised that the seemingly bashful, blue-eyed man had enough daring to put it so bluntly.

"You're not the first…."

"…and obviously won't be the last." The man finished dryly with quiet seething. Obviously Ryo had left out some other details about the emerald-eyed, raven haired, near Adonis man next to him.

"Listen……" Dee shifted back a bit as both forearms leaned against the front edge of the desk. He took a breath as if to continue, his fingers spread apart to put emphasis on whatever it was he was about to say, but then nothing came out, and he gave a slight pause to give thought as to what he would say.

"Armon." The man offered, earning him a sliding glance of those distinctive predatorily eyes. As if he would ever forget the man's name! He snapped in a low growl, "I don't give a flying fuck to hear anything more you have to say -- especially if it has to do with Ryo! So you can either leave now, on your own two feet, or I'll have you escorted out of here. And tell Ryo not to send me his little 'friend' to solicit for him again!"

"I can leave on my own, thank you," The smaller man copped his own attitude. "But for your information, Officer Laytner, Ryo did not send me to you for anything. He doesn't even know I'm here."

"How gallant of you then." Sarcasm dripped from his words.

"Before I leave, there is something that I believe you should take a look at."

"And what is that?"

His demeanor fell slightly, as Armon fidget a little under the man's cold gaze. His next words were going to reflect more of a trap than the truth. "It's in my car."

Dee's eyebrows shot upward in suspicious disbelief.

"It is very important." He lowered his eyes, and there was actually almost a hint of a childlike pout.

"In your car, huh?" Dee sat back, folding his arms across his chest again, keeping unwavering eyes upon him, he queried with skepticism, "Why couldn't you bring it in here?"

"Because it's really best that you see in private."

Dee gave a restrained snort of cynicism. "Wouldn't happen to be Ryo, would it?"

Moving his other arm to slip between the space of the folded jacket, Armon concealed the fingers that he crossed together.

"No. It isn't."

"Got plans to hit me in the head, and drag me off to him?"

Armon sighed, with a shake of his head. The man certainly wasn't making this easy.

"Really, Officer Laytner, you easily dwarf my size and strength. Are you so weak that you think I could over power you?"

"That's one thing that people misjudge sizing up a person. Just because they appear smaller or weaker…"

"Please." He cut the obnoxious officer off, and stood up. Pulling his arm out from beneath the jacket, he looked at the watch on his wrist. "I have a flight to catch soon anyway. It won't take long. You'll… understand."

Dee gave a few moments more thought, then shoved himself out of the chair. Standing up did give him the advantage of intimidation by size.

"Fine. Show me. This had better not be a trick."

"Thank you. It isn't."

*****************

Dee's eyes scanned the dimmer environment of the parking garage, watching for any signs of trickery as he continued to follow the well-dressed man. He noticed that the man took a set of keys with a small remote out of his pocket, as they neared one of the vehicles.

"You're taking that to the airport?" he asked a bit surprise, coming to stand a couple of steps back from the rear corner of a brand new Red Toyota Solara. What person would leave a car like this at a New York airport? And the cost of keeping a vehicle there would be phenomenal if left for a length of time.

"Heh, no." The smaller man relaxed a bit, pushing a button on the remote he had in his hand. "I'm leaving it with a friend, and they are taking me there." With a soft click, the back end popped open, and he reached out to push the lid the rest of the way up.

Dee's eyes shifted from the view of the car's interior to that of the back of the trunk, but from where he stood, he had less of a view of the inner recess. The other man motioned for him to come closer, and Dee did so with a touch of curiosity. Inside laid a rectangle shaped parcel wrapped in brown paper with a string tied around it. It wasn't quite as big as the trunk itself, maybe three-quarters of its size.

"Go ahead," Armon encouraged the cat-like eyed officer. "Open it."

Dee gave him a dubiously look, but finally reached down and pulled the string loose; keeping his senses on high -- just in case. Sticking his head in someone else's vehicle just wasn't his idea of comfort. With the binding gone, the wrapping pulled off easily.

The breath caught in his throat as he stood back, staring down at the painted canvas before him. Familiar faces filled his sight.

"What the hell…?" The words barely managed to even be whispered between his lips. It felt as if someone had solidly hit him in the chest.

There, on a setting of a white sheet covered couch, laid Ryo stretched out on his stomach, bare as the day he was born. His sandy brown hair was in a sexy dishevel about his face and the look he had upon it was one that Dee was so achingly familiar with. Unmistakable feelings gleamed in the dark depths as he stared outward; a hint of a shy smile etched his soft blushing lips. Beside him, on the other side, Dee shockingly recognized his own face.

He was sitting up, and lounged the opposite way Ryo was. He held himself up on one outstretched arm, as one knee was bent upward, allowing a view of a bare thigh and leg. His other hand was on the small of Ryo back. Olive skin against Ryo's lighter color made a beautiful contrast.

His dark hair was also a mess, suggesting that something had gone on between the two to make their appearance that way. His own face was more openly visible, and displayed a relaxed, unguarded smile, showing a softer side of himself. Sea green eyes glance tenderly down at the man before him.

It was a very sensual, very erotic pose of the two of them.

"Umm…" Words were hard to form in his mind at the moment. "You…?"

"Yes."

The was a short silence between the two.

"Did Ryo not tell you?"

Slowly Dee moved his head back and forth. Actually he never gave him a chance to. He remembered a dozen of so times that Ryo had tried to say something to him, had begged him to talk, but he would not listen. He didn't want to hear…

"I meet Ryo quite a few months ago at the market." The soft lilt of the man's voice held part of Dee's attention. "You know the one that's down on…"

"I know where you're talking about." he interjected.

The man gave a rueful smile, but continued his story. "Well, Ryo was… umm… very… pretty. Strong, yet… there was a gentle quality about him. Being an artist, I have a weakness to capture things of interest on canvas."

Dee remained quiet, listening to the man as he rambled on, while he continued to stare at the painting.

"I was the one to approach him back then. We talked for a while, then I… propositioned him." Although the dark haired officer did not say anything or look his way, Armon noticed the slight tenseness of the man's jaw and an eye brow that quirked upward. But he threw precaution to the wind and continued on. "After some doing, I finally managed to get him to come to my place and look at the work I did. I wanted him to know that I wasn't all talk."

Still unable to tear his eyes away, Dee murmured, "I can see that you're not."

At the man's compliment, Armon felt a swell of pride. Even though he knew he did excellent work himself, it still took words from others to keep that reassurance alive.

"Ryo was impressed."

"I bet." By the sound of those two words, Armon wasn't sure whether they were a compliment or he was being derisive.

"I came to realize, after he saw my work, that he had something more in mind than deciding whether he would pose for me or not."

Dee gave grunt of true sarcasm this time. "I bet."

"My intentions were to use Ryo, but he had intentions of using me instead."

"Welcome to the 'Used by Ryo' club." Dee couldn't help the indecorous remark. "Goes to prove innocent looks are deceiving."

With a bit of irritation, the artist murmured, "It amazes me how dense you are, too."

When the emerald eyes turned upon him, and an angry scowl began to come over the officer's face, Armon flung out a hand to indicate the portrait that laid in the back of his vehicle, and added much louder, "Good God, man! It's staring you right in the face, and you're still so unwilling to see it!"

Bending over slightly, he removed the painted canvas out of the trunk and shoved it into the other man's hands.

"Whatever it is that you want to imply, Officer Laytner, the truth is that my intentions were to use Ryo as a subject; He had intentions of using me as an artist!"

There was a lull of silence following that outburst. The well-dressed artist stood there staring vexly at the police officer, trying to regain his composure, while the other stared at the painting in his hands -- stared at Ryo, laying upon… a similar white, cloth covered couch… just like that day he walked in on them.

In Dee's stupor, the artist rambled on. "I didn't see or hear from him for a while after that, but then I got a call. Ryo wanted to commission me to paint this for him. It was to be a present. So we came to an agreement that if he posed for me, I would be more than willing to do this for him."

Armon took a moments pause, watching the other man's face that was studying the portrait intensely.

"It was an anniversary present… to you," he continued, a bit softer.

Still there was nothing from the other man.

"I think," The smaller man went on. "that seeing you now, I did an excellent job in capturing your imagine from Ryo's description and the photograph he supplied."

The soft tapping atop the painting, captured Dee's attention and when he glanced up, he saw what looked to be a photograph. Taking it, he saw that it was a snapshot of himself. He remembered this….

*** FLASHBACK ***

A flash went off.

"Ryo you take any more pictures, and I'm gonna be blind."

The light color haired man flashed him a smile. "You're suppose to take pictures of places you go on vacation."

"Yeah, but I doubt blinding your companion is part of that ritual."

"Come on, Dee," Ryo pleaded. "Relax. Just a few more. Bend your knee up for me."

"Ryo, you've been posing me the last two days. What are you up to?"

(A moment of the present) -- Dee remembered, as if clearly seeing for the first time, the brief pause Ryo had made. It hadn't - then - dawned on him that anything was amiss, yet, at this moment, he could all too clearly see how the man's lashes swept down over his eyes to cover the truth they might show, however he was unable to conceal the revealing pink tinge that brushed across his cheeks .

He fidgeted with the camera, and stumbling for words a bit, but because of the next choice of words that sprung out of Ryo's mouth, Dee had not taken it to be anything other than embarrassment. It was those words, not to mention the look he gave him, that had thrown Dee completely off intentions that he could so clearly distinguish what they were now. -- (End the moment of the present)

Lashes lifted and the sparkle of those amazing dark eyes took him by surprise.

"What? Don't think I might want to have some sexy pictures, of my sexy guy?"

That had done it, as the smile that lit up Dee's face confirmed.

"Come on, Dee. Please?"

With his ego stroked, Dee could do no less than to fulfill his lover's wish.

Feeling a surge of playful dominance, Dee could not help but to exploit the boldness of his more bashful partner on the matter he toyed with, and took enjoyment from furthering Ryo's mild embarrassment.

With mischievous eyes, he returned, "How do you want me this time, Ryo?"

The deeper blush that crept over his cheeks indicated he had hit his target.

"Bend your knee up."

Dee did as requested. "Like this?"

"Yeah." Ryo answered with a smile, focusing with the camera.

"So," His green-eyed lover drawled, wiggling fingers of his unoccupied hand. "where do you want my hand at?"

Ryo paused, looking over the top of the camera. Widened eyes showed a touch of shock, but the rest of his expression was hidden behind the camera.

"Umm… uh… maybe across the upraised knee." Again he went back to focusing him in. "Yeah, like that. Smile at me." and the camera's flash went off.

"Are you done?"

"Just one more and the roll with be finished, OK?"

(A moment of the present) -- The last picture, Dee mused. Ryo had wanted something more natural… well the cat-eating-the-cream grin was a natural one for him where Ryo was concerned, but the man wanted something less… ardent.

For some reason a grin touched upon his lips, as he remembered sitting there, looking a bit beyond Ryo, just waiting for him to snap the picture, when a ball started rolling toward him. He had barely glanced down, as he reached out to stop it when the flash went off. -- (End the moment of the present)

"Well, that ought to be a good one," Dee said dryly getting up, and tossing the intruding object back to the kids that had misdirected it.

Ryo just shrugged, not seeming to mind from the smile he gave him. The whirl of the camera sounded as it rewound the film inside.

*** END OF FLASHBACK ***

Dee lowered the picture to look at the painting again. His representation upon the canvas looked exactly like he did in the picture except he appeared to be naked and Ryo had himself added under his outstretched hand.

'Yeah, Ryo, it was a good picture after all.'

An ache began to gnaw at his stomach, and a sinking feeling settled in.

The movement of the man next to him disturbed Dee out of his gnawing daze, and he watched silently as he reached back into the trunk and pulled out another wrapped parcel, which had been under the larger one, and uncovered it himself.

"I think," Armon murmured softly, lifting it so that Dee could see it clearly. "you should have this too."

Shifting his eyes, Dee gazed at the painted canvas that the man held. It was nearly half the size of the one he held, and displayed only Ryo's image. The painting suggested that he was naked even though it showed only his face and upper body. There was a soft billowy background of light gray so that the whiteness of the pillow he leaned against and the darkness of his eyes would stand out. One arm was bent around and over the pillow to nestle a spot for his chin, as the other wrapped itself around it. His hair was messy, with some of the tendrils clinging damply against his face, and he had the most incredible look on his face as his painted eyes stare outward, almost as if they were looking straight at him. The tender expression on his face showed a man that was totally in love and looking as though he was gazing at his unseen lover.

A bit of jealousy began to weld up within Dee as the thought of Ryo laying there, with that kind of expression on his face, while the man painted him. He would have been who was in Ryo's sight, so did this painting show the truth of what was really there between the two?

"I dubbed this one, In Love With Dee."

The painting was turned briefly to show the artist label attached to the back, and the look on the officer's face was really quite remarkable for one that didn't care.

"I wanted a certain… look, so I had him talk about you in hopes of obtaining what I wanted. I don't think I've come across anyone that was more 'in love' with someone. I actually think I did a poor job in capturing the essences of what he felt." Armon frowned a bit, disappointed in his ability. It was a beautiful portrait, -- an excellent portrait, -- but sometimes there was just something beyond what is allowed to be captured despite the talent. "I thought you to be quite a lucky guy to have someone love them so much as Ryo loves you."

"I… saw the two of you…" Dee spoke in a mesmerized trance.

"Umm… well…," The artist ashamedly admitted, looking away and down at the cement ground. "That was… That was my fault."

There was another quiet pause as the man tried to gather the right words to say. It was difficult speaking of such to the man that he had cause quiet a bit of… misunderstanding and heartache.

"I--I was attracted to him the first time I spoke with him, but when he took me up on my offer, studying him, staring at him, seeing the warmth of love that eluded out of him, I was… quite drawn to him. I just wanted…" He knew he had to be a bit careful with his choice of words. He was sure the other man knew what he had wanted. "I--I caught him completely off guard. He was pulling away when he caught sight of you. If you have anyone to be angry with, it's me, not Ryo."

There was another uncomfortable silence as the two stood there. Armon stared at the top of the officer's shoes, watching for any sign that Ryo's lover would charge after him

"I'm sorry that I… that I've caused any trouble between the two of you."

"Oh, yeah?" Eyebrows arched with disbelieving annoyance. "What the hell took you this long to come and say anything?"

Glancing cautiously back at the slightly vibrating man before him, Armon responded, "I was involved in finishing the painting for Ryo mostly, and preparing for a showing. My engrossments in my work tend to leave me pretty well a recluse."

"I saw you walking with Ryo…"

"And that was the last time I saw him myself… until today. He never came back to the studio. I tried to contact him, but he never returned any of my calls. I stopped by the apartment once, but didn't get any response. I even left a note under the door.

I did the best I could without him.

I thought that he would have gotten in touch with me sooner since the painting was so important to him. I contacted him this morning because I'm leaving for a show in Los Angeles, and I'll be gone a few weeks."

He grew quiet again, having something else to say, but not knowing exactly how to say it. It was Dee that broke the silence.

"You said you were giving me this too?" He indicated the portrait of Ryo. "Why? I thought you said you exchanged doing this one for that one."

"I had intended to have it as part of an exhibit, but I found that I would not be able to part with it, selling it to some stranger. I also found that I can't keep something… such as this and not want to have it for myself. So, since I can't sell or keep it, I think the right place it should be is with you instead. This belongs with the person from whom the expression on Ryo's face is expressed for. As much as I wish, it doesn't belong to me… and it never would."

"So… umm… you and… Ryo…"

"Are just artist and subject. Nothing more. Ryo's heart belongs to someone else."

With a sickening feeling of his own, Dee murmured, "You said something about Ryo not being… well."

The dark haired man was quiet for a few moments as he looked down at the cement ground around his feet.

"Yes. As I said before, I went to see him. I thought… uh… that he would… want this before I would return."

With his eyes narrowing, Dee asked, "So, why are you giving them to me instead? Why didn't you leave them there with him?"

"He… He told me that… the reason for the painting didn't matter anymore. He said he didn't care what I did with the picture. I could burn it, if I wanted to. He said he didn't want the reminder of…" Armon swallowed hard. "That's why I came to you.

I--I didn't know. I asked how things were that last time I saw him, but… I guess he didn't tell me just how bad things were, did he?"

The artist looked up at the other man with a bit of shamed embarrassment.

"I really like Ryo; he's a good man. But… I'm not a friend at all, being caught up in my own world not to… I kept giving myself an excuse that he didn't want you to know about the painting, but I…

You could say he's the complete opposite of what you see in this portrait of him. If he doesn't… snap out of it soon, I dare not think what will happen. Do you think perhaps, then, Officer Laytner, it would be of concern enough to you once he is in the hospital?"

A numbing ache coursed through Dee's body, making it nearly impossible to speak let alone move.

"What's wrong with him?" The words scraped the back of his throat as he said them, genuinely concerned now, whereas before, he had not wanted to know anything from this man.

"He's lost something of great importance to him."

Dee continued to stare at the artist, feeling every shard of memory cut into him. All the chances Ryo had begged of him, and he hadn't listen… wouldn't listen. He wouldn't give the one person he had loved most in the world, not even one fucking chance.

"He lost you."

God, when was the nightmare going to end?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ End of Part 10 ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

OK! Have I pulled it off to this point? Was it an anticlimax of finding out what Ryo really did and didn't do? How many of you guessed this part, or something like it? I really would like to hear your comments on this chapter. Was it worth finding out?

PLEASE review.

NO! This is not the ending, yet(!) if I haven't gotten killed by people throwing things at me over this chapter. Dee's just realize a big mistake… (an honest mistake, but…) huge mistake… but now what is Ryo going to do? Has he been too hurt? Maybe Dee can't forgive himself now. Don't worry, not going to drag you all through 9 chapters of more angst… (at least not 9 of them anyway) Not hinting about how it ends.

Huge Thank you for all those that have made reviews.

Alaskan Blue - Thank you for your review. I hope that you enjoyed this chapter.

Icewind - I appreciate your comment on my story very much. Tell me what you thought of this chapter as well.

aikyo - Has it been seven days already…. I really thought it's been longer than that, but oh well…. Here's your next chapter.

tertai - Umm… uh-oh… uh… Sorry, I can't answer your question here at this time, because it does come into the story line. And since you like Bikky in this he's going to have a bigger appearance in the next chapter. Hope you like him in it as well.

greenclover - As I mentioned with tertai, Bikky's in the next chapter too… with a little more 'different' feelings as before. Here… another tissue.

sirencirce - NO! Not wrong… only because it brings you back to read my fic…heh heh… After reading this one, what did you think?

Devil666sc - Thank you… yeap… sometimes reading something out loud changes how your mind sees it. I even read what I write out loud to give it a different 'view'.