Fan Fiction / InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Lollipop Licking Contest ❯ One-Shot
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: swt_anime_chick 
Exactly what the summary says: silly, sick, and fun. It may be just a lollipop licking contest but it's pretty more than that!
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction / InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Hentai / Comedy | Type: One Shot | Uploaded On: 06.23.2004 | Pages: 4 | Words: 1.8K | Visits: 1.8K | Status: Completed
Exactly what the summary says: silly, sick, and fun. It may be just a lollipop licking contest but it's pretty more than that!
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction / InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Hentai / Comedy | Type: One Shot | Uploaded On: 06.23.2004 | Pages: 4 | Words: 1.8K | Visits: 1.8K | Status: Completed
Starring--
Judy Lui ((ME!))
Ivy Iverson
Mitsuko Takeda
Rosa Heartland
Judy: *sigh* *stares at ceiling* I’m sooo bored! What do you three want to do?
Rosa: *smiles widely* Can I go out with Miroku?
Others: NO!!!
Ivy: How about an intellectual novel review?
Rosa & Mitsuko: Translation?
Ivy: *pounds head* BOOK TALK!!!
Mitsuko: You don’t have to be fucking rude...
Rosa: *sticks out tongue* Yeah!
Judy: Tongue...sweet...I’ve got it! Let’s have a lollipop-licking contest! ^_^
Others: *raises an eyebrow* We don’t want to do that!
Judy: No choice...read the title...
Others: *reads title*
Mitsuko: Lollipop-licking contest? That’s bull shit!
Ivy: No interest to me...but sure. There’s a first for everything.
Rosa: *kicks ground* I’d rather lick something else...
Judy: Hooray! Here’s the order form!
Others: *picks out flavor and shape of the lollipop*
Judy: *sends out order form* *waits a few minutes* Here you go! Strawberries & creme for Suki, tropical punch for Ivy, butter rum for Rosa, and watermelon for me! I’ve also printed out the rules and restrictions.
Ivy & Rosa: Always use a different method of licking and/or sucking. Whoever finishes their sucker first, wins. *squints to read fine print* NO damaging, murderizing, or destruction of lollipop. If fail to do so will result in automatic disqualification.
Mitsuko: *comes in room* Sorry. I was gone. Gimme those rules! *skims rules* OK! This’ll be quick!
Judy: Ready? Go!
Ivy: *opens sucker and pops it in her mouth* *heads over to book shelf and gets a book out to speed read*
Rosa: *opens sucker* *gives a few licks to get sucker wet, sticky, and runny* *starts sucking liquid from sucker*
Ivy: Eww...what are you doing, Rosa?
Rosa: It’s my method; I call it “air-sucking”!
Ivy: You’re not going to be the victor with that method!
Rosa: You’re such a smartass!
Ivy: *scoffs and continues reading*
Judy: *sucking away ((wrapper’s off, of course))* I’m just gonna suck...mmm * starts playing Game Boy* Where’s Mitsuko?
Mitsuko: *drinking shake* *exhales* I WON! IN YOUR FACES, SUCKERS!!!
Others: How?! It’s only been five minutes!
Mitsuko: There’s no time limit, right? I fucking won and you bitches are just being jealous!
Judy: On the contrary, I think you lost. Exactly, how did you lick all of your sucker?
Mitsuko: I pounded it into powder and added it to my daily nutrient power boost milkshake.
Others: You are so DIQUALIFIED!!!
Mitsuko: Why?!
Ivy: read the fine print, dummy.
Mitsuko: *carefully read fine print* You cannot damage, murderize, or destroy lollipop...not even if you’re going to make your daily Nutrient Power Boost Milkshake...God DAMN it!!! I am disqualified. *kicks ground* Oh, well...I’ve got better things to do besides winning a damn contest. *goes outside*
Judy: *shakes head* That girl never does anything the right way. It doesn’t matter now.
~*30 minutes later*~
Judy: YAY! I defeated Red! ((I was playing Pokemon: Gold version))
Ivy: How small is your lollipop, Judy and Rosa?
Judy: About halfway.
Rosa: HALFWAY?! I’m not even there yet!
Ivy: Like I said, air-sucking will never work!
Rosa: Shut up! I don’t hear you saying anything!
Ivy: *takes out sucker* Two-thirds done...I’m not trying to brag, but when you don’t think about the sucker, it’ll just dissolve away... *puts sucker back in*
Rosa: *glares* Ivy...
Ivy: You know? Just to keep you busy, I’m going to say, “Air-sucking will never work, Rosa,” each time I finish a chapter.
Rosa: How long is a chapter?
Ivy: 150 pages.
Rosa: Puh-leez! I’ll be way done before you even get done with a chapter! *starts sucking rapidly*
~*10 minutes later*~
Ivy: *spits out sucker stick* Well...I won! Fair and square. And I’m done with a chapter. How are you doing Rosa?
Rosa: *glances at almost full sucker* I’m making progress. Are you sure that was one hundred- fifty pages?
Ivy: *nods* I can speed read. Oh yeah...you will not get anywhere by air-sucking, Rosa.
Rosa: *gives death glare* *starts sucking again*
Ivy: I’ll just continue to read...
~*30 minutes later*~
Judy: *pulls sucker stick out* Phew! Finally...I’m done.
Mitsuko: C’mon! Let’s go to Barnes & Nobles, already!
Judy: *hops on Mitsuko’s motorcycle* We’re going to buy some manga! Or at least, I am...
Mitsuko: I’m gonna steal some gift cards...*vrooms off*
Ivy: Guess it’s just you and me...
Rosa: Yup!
~* 5 hours later*~
Ivy: You’re never...
Rosa: ...gonna get anywhere by air-sucking...give it a rest! You’ve been doing that for five hours straight...I’m hungry for dinner.
Ivy: I am too...are you halfway done yet?
Rosa: *lets out BIG sigh* Yup...I’m halfway done.
Ivy: *closes book* Five hours and you’re not halfway finished?
Rosa: I said I was, now make me dinner!
Ivy: *heads into kitchen*
~*1 hour later*~
Ivy: DINNER!!!
Rosa: Finally, I’m starved. What’s for dinner?
Ivy: For me, a chicken pot pie, Caesar salad, beef stew, and coffee ice cream for dessert.
Rosa: Sounds delish! *gets slapped on the hand* Oww...
Ivy: You little silly! Your dinner consists of canned tomato soup, a dinner roll with margarine on it, and one of those mini apple pies you get at Albertson’s...and milk to wash it all down.
Rosa: Oh! NO fair! I get the cruddy dinner...I could have gotten chicken noodle or minestrone soup.
Ivy: Well, it fits for a loser.
Rosa: *Vash cry* *kicks ground* I don’t want it!
Ivy: Fine, then you can have your sucker for dinner.
Rosa: That’s not the point. Everything’s still raw!
Ivy: I didn’t have the time to cook it. I prepared it though. All you need to do is: un-can the soup, put it in a bowl, add a can of water to it, microwave for about four minutes, and there’s your soup. For the mini pie, just heat it up for about half a minute.
Rosa: Then, how come it took you a whole hour to make dinner?
Ivy: I made everything from scratch.
Rosa: Fine, be that way. *starts un-canning*
~*3 hours later*~
Ivy: *yawn* I’ve done my homework, the extra credit, the chores, and got washed up to go to bed, and you’re still not done?
Rosa: Huh?! I don’t care! I won’t give up! I’ll stay up all night if I need to!
Ivy: Ok...good night. Mitsuko and Judy should come back to the studio later if you still need company.
~*45 minutes later*~
Mitsuko & Judy: We’re back!
Rosa: *startled* Wha? Oh...hi guys...
Judy: *looks at three fourth done sucker* Hmm...it looks like you’re not done.
Rosa: DUH!
Mitsuko: *laughing* HA HA HA! Ivy was right. Air-sucking doesn’t work after all...well it does...except it takes forever for you to eat.
Rosa: *whiny voice* You’re so mean, Suki!!!
Mitsuko: I know, aren’t I?
Judy: *yawns* I’ll be heading to my sleeping quarters...hopefully you’ll be done with your sucker, Rosa.
Rosa: *big sigh* I hope I will be too.
Mitsuko: I’ll be heading out.
Rosa: Why?!
Mitsuko: I gotta mug somebody. This bastard called me “sexy” while I was heading to Barnes & Nobles. And also practice my street fighting skills. See you in the morning, babe.
Rosa: Bye, Hon.
~*next morning*~
Rosa: *screams loudly* AAAHHHHHHH!!!!! YYYAAAAYYYY!!!!!! I FINALLY DID IT!!!! YYYAAAAYYY!!!...*timid voice* oops...
Judy: *groggily* Golly, Polly, why so loud, dear Molly? *shakes head* Ooh...sorry. Really...what’s wrong?
Ivy: *stomps into room* Gosh! What is your problem, Rosa? I still needed thirty minutes left of sleep before waking.
Rosa: I finished my sucker! I feel proud!!!
Mitsuko: *limps in room...she’s full of bruises and cuts* Feel proud of what?
Rosa: *glomps Mitsuko* My sucker’s gone for good! Aren’t you proud of me?
Mitsuko: *eye twitches* *shoves Rosa off* Damn it, woman...all ‘cause I insult you, doesn’t mean you have to kill me...as you might see, I’m brutally wounded here, and here you are, giving me this great, big hug!
Rosa: Sorry...oh yeah...How’d the fight go?
Mitsuko: Heh...it was great. There was four of ‘em and I kicked their sorry asses! I didn’t have to use my silent pistol.
Others: Well, don’t you feel good?
Mitsuko: Damn good...*yawns, sniffs* Yuck, I rot...I’ll be needing a good shower and a I’ll be sleeping in. See y’all later.
Rosa: *looks at clock and gasps* OMIGOD! I’m going to be late for school! Good thing there’s two full-sized bathrooms! See you guys in eight hours!
Judy: I’d better be off too.
Ivy: Need a ride?
Judy: *smiles* Please and thank you.
Ivy: Rosa can catch the bus. Let’s go now.
~*>THE END<*~
Judy Lui ((ME!))
Ivy Iverson
Mitsuko Takeda
Rosa Heartland
Judy: *sigh* *stares at ceiling* I’m sooo bored! What do you three want to do?
Rosa: *smiles widely* Can I go out with Miroku?
Others: NO!!!
Ivy: How about an intellectual novel review?
Rosa & Mitsuko: Translation?
Ivy: *pounds head* BOOK TALK!!!
Mitsuko: You don’t have to be fucking rude...
Rosa: *sticks out tongue* Yeah!
Judy: Tongue...sweet...I’ve got it! Let’s have a lollipop-licking contest! ^_^
Others: *raises an eyebrow* We don’t want to do that!
Judy: No choice...read the title...
Others: *reads title*
Mitsuko: Lollipop-licking contest? That’s bull shit!
Ivy: No interest to me...but sure. There’s a first for everything.
Rosa: *kicks ground* I’d rather lick something else...
Judy: Hooray! Here’s the order form!
Others: *picks out flavor and shape of the lollipop*
Judy: *sends out order form* *waits a few minutes* Here you go! Strawberries & creme for Suki, tropical punch for Ivy, butter rum for Rosa, and watermelon for me! I’ve also printed out the rules and restrictions.
Ivy & Rosa: Always use a different method of licking and/or sucking. Whoever finishes their sucker first, wins. *squints to read fine print* NO damaging, murderizing, or destruction of lollipop. If fail to do so will result in automatic disqualification.
Mitsuko: *comes in room* Sorry. I was gone. Gimme those rules! *skims rules* OK! This’ll be quick!
Judy: Ready? Go!
Ivy: *opens sucker and pops it in her mouth* *heads over to book shelf and gets a book out to speed read*
Rosa: *opens sucker* *gives a few licks to get sucker wet, sticky, and runny* *starts sucking liquid from sucker*
Ivy: Eww...what are you doing, Rosa?
Rosa: It’s my method; I call it “air-sucking”!
Ivy: You’re not going to be the victor with that method!
Rosa: You’re such a smartass!
Ivy: *scoffs and continues reading*
Judy: *sucking away ((wrapper’s off, of course))* I’m just gonna suck...mmm * starts playing Game Boy* Where’s Mitsuko?
Mitsuko: *drinking shake* *exhales* I WON! IN YOUR FACES, SUCKERS!!!
Others: How?! It’s only been five minutes!
Mitsuko: There’s no time limit, right? I fucking won and you bitches are just being jealous!
Judy: On the contrary, I think you lost. Exactly, how did you lick all of your sucker?
Mitsuko: I pounded it into powder and added it to my daily nutrient power boost milkshake.
Others: You are so DIQUALIFIED!!!
Mitsuko: Why?!
Ivy: read the fine print, dummy.
Mitsuko: *carefully read fine print* You cannot damage, murderize, or destroy lollipop...not even if you’re going to make your daily Nutrient Power Boost Milkshake...God DAMN it!!! I am disqualified. *kicks ground* Oh, well...I’ve got better things to do besides winning a damn contest. *goes outside*
Judy: *shakes head* That girl never does anything the right way. It doesn’t matter now.
~*30 minutes later*~
Judy: YAY! I defeated Red! ((I was playing Pokemon: Gold version))
Ivy: How small is your lollipop, Judy and Rosa?
Judy: About halfway.
Rosa: HALFWAY?! I’m not even there yet!
Ivy: Like I said, air-sucking will never work!
Rosa: Shut up! I don’t hear you saying anything!
Ivy: *takes out sucker* Two-thirds done...I’m not trying to brag, but when you don’t think about the sucker, it’ll just dissolve away... *puts sucker back in*
Rosa: *glares* Ivy...
Ivy: You know? Just to keep you busy, I’m going to say, “Air-sucking will never work, Rosa,” each time I finish a chapter.
Rosa: How long is a chapter?
Ivy: 150 pages.
Rosa: Puh-leez! I’ll be way done before you even get done with a chapter! *starts sucking rapidly*
~*10 minutes later*~
Ivy: *spits out sucker stick* Well...I won! Fair and square. And I’m done with a chapter. How are you doing Rosa?
Rosa: *glances at almost full sucker* I’m making progress. Are you sure that was one hundred- fifty pages?
Ivy: *nods* I can speed read. Oh yeah...you will not get anywhere by air-sucking, Rosa.
Rosa: *gives death glare* *starts sucking again*
Ivy: I’ll just continue to read...
~*30 minutes later*~
Judy: *pulls sucker stick out* Phew! Finally...I’m done.
Mitsuko: C’mon! Let’s go to Barnes & Nobles, already!
Judy: *hops on Mitsuko’s motorcycle* We’re going to buy some manga! Or at least, I am...
Mitsuko: I’m gonna steal some gift cards...*vrooms off*
Ivy: Guess it’s just you and me...
Rosa: Yup!
~* 5 hours later*~
Ivy: You’re never...
Rosa: ...gonna get anywhere by air-sucking...give it a rest! You’ve been doing that for five hours straight...I’m hungry for dinner.
Ivy: I am too...are you halfway done yet?
Rosa: *lets out BIG sigh* Yup...I’m halfway done.
Ivy: *closes book* Five hours and you’re not halfway finished?
Rosa: I said I was, now make me dinner!
Ivy: *heads into kitchen*
~*1 hour later*~
Ivy: DINNER!!!
Rosa: Finally, I’m starved. What’s for dinner?
Ivy: For me, a chicken pot pie, Caesar salad, beef stew, and coffee ice cream for dessert.
Rosa: Sounds delish! *gets slapped on the hand* Oww...
Ivy: You little silly! Your dinner consists of canned tomato soup, a dinner roll with margarine on it, and one of those mini apple pies you get at Albertson’s...and milk to wash it all down.
Rosa: Oh! NO fair! I get the cruddy dinner...I could have gotten chicken noodle or minestrone soup.
Ivy: Well, it fits for a loser.
Rosa: *Vash cry* *kicks ground* I don’t want it!
Ivy: Fine, then you can have your sucker for dinner.
Rosa: That’s not the point. Everything’s still raw!
Ivy: I didn’t have the time to cook it. I prepared it though. All you need to do is: un-can the soup, put it in a bowl, add a can of water to it, microwave for about four minutes, and there’s your soup. For the mini pie, just heat it up for about half a minute.
Rosa: Then, how come it took you a whole hour to make dinner?
Ivy: I made everything from scratch.
Rosa: Fine, be that way. *starts un-canning*
~*3 hours later*~
Ivy: *yawn* I’ve done my homework, the extra credit, the chores, and got washed up to go to bed, and you’re still not done?
Rosa: Huh?! I don’t care! I won’t give up! I’ll stay up all night if I need to!
Ivy: Ok...good night. Mitsuko and Judy should come back to the studio later if you still need company.
~*45 minutes later*~
Mitsuko & Judy: We’re back!
Rosa: *startled* Wha? Oh...hi guys...
Judy: *looks at three fourth done sucker* Hmm...it looks like you’re not done.
Rosa: DUH!
Mitsuko: *laughing* HA HA HA! Ivy was right. Air-sucking doesn’t work after all...well it does...except it takes forever for you to eat.
Rosa: *whiny voice* You’re so mean, Suki!!!
Mitsuko: I know, aren’t I?
Judy: *yawns* I’ll be heading to my sleeping quarters...hopefully you’ll be done with your sucker, Rosa.
Rosa: *big sigh* I hope I will be too.
Mitsuko: I’ll be heading out.
Rosa: Why?!
Mitsuko: I gotta mug somebody. This bastard called me “sexy” while I was heading to Barnes & Nobles. And also practice my street fighting skills. See you in the morning, babe.
Rosa: Bye, Hon.
~*next morning*~
Rosa: *screams loudly* AAAHHHHHHH!!!!! YYYAAAAYYYY!!!!!! I FINALLY DID IT!!!! YYYAAAAYYY!!!...*timid voice* oops...
Judy: *groggily* Golly, Polly, why so loud, dear Molly? *shakes head* Ooh...sorry. Really...what’s wrong?
Ivy: *stomps into room* Gosh! What is your problem, Rosa? I still needed thirty minutes left of sleep before waking.
Rosa: I finished my sucker! I feel proud!!!
Mitsuko: *limps in room...she’s full of bruises and cuts* Feel proud of what?
Rosa: *glomps Mitsuko* My sucker’s gone for good! Aren’t you proud of me?
Mitsuko: *eye twitches* *shoves Rosa off* Damn it, woman...all ‘cause I insult you, doesn’t mean you have to kill me...as you might see, I’m brutally wounded here, and here you are, giving me this great, big hug!
Rosa: Sorry...oh yeah...How’d the fight go?
Mitsuko: Heh...it was great. There was four of ‘em and I kicked their sorry asses! I didn’t have to use my silent pistol.
Others: Well, don’t you feel good?
Mitsuko: Damn good...*yawns, sniffs* Yuck, I rot...I’ll be needing a good shower and a I’ll be sleeping in. See y’all later.
Rosa: *looks at clock and gasps* OMIGOD! I’m going to be late for school! Good thing there’s two full-sized bathrooms! See you guys in eight hours!
Judy: I’d better be off too.
Ivy: Need a ride?
Judy: *smiles* Please and thank you.
Ivy: Rosa can catch the bus. Let’s go now.
~*>THE END<*~