Fan Fiction / Zoids Fan Fiction ❯ Shattered Reality ❯ dreams ( Chapter 4 )

He didn't know what was going on, all was dark around him and he couldn't see the hand that was in front of his face. He seemed to be floating in some type of liquid. "What is this? Where am I?" was a thought that went through Van's head at that moment. He had no idea about what was going on. He racked his mind for possible answers but only one seemed to come out.

`Isn't it obvious what happened to you?' came another voice. The voice sounded remarkably like Van's but Van knew that it wasn't possible because he was right there and nowhere else.

"Am I dead? Is that what happened?" Van asked although he was very fearful from the answer. Mental images popped up into his head of Fiona crying by his still form on a bed. "Fiona," said Van quietly. All he could do was watch her and not try to comfort her. It was tearing him apart to see her like that. It made it worse that he couldn't help her at that moment..

`No, you are not dead yet. Right now you have a much more important job to do but you are not ready for it yet. When the time comes you will know when it is that the time is right for you to return to your body,' said the voice as it echoed all around the area that Van was in.

"What is it that I have to do?" asked Van as he looked around the dark place trying to find the source of the voice but he was having no such luck in finding any sign of whoever it was.

`You know what it is that you are waiting for,' said the voice as a bright flash of light surrounded him. it lit the room up but there was absolutely no one in the room as far as Van could see.

"No I don't, please tell me what it is that I have to do?" yelled Van before he was engulfed in this light. It seemed to blind his eyes as everything went out of focus. "What is it that I have to do?" yelled Van as he struggled to get out of the strange field that was trying to engulf him. Van had a strange feeling that it was death that was following him. He broke free from the light at that moment and landed in the darkness once more. Light was always good but Van had a feeling that in the circumstance it was a bad thing to get used to. "I am not going to let myself die. I am going to get back," yelled Van to whoever it was that he was talking to.

`That is what I wanted to hear. There is something very important that you must protect and something even more important that you must love with all of you heart,' said the voice. Knowing that Van knew what he was talking about now.

"Fiona," said Van as if realization had hit him hard. `No that can't be, I don't love Fiona, or do I?' Van asked himself as he tried to find what it was that compelled himself to think of Fiona for that reason at the moment. "Do I, or don't I?" Van asked himself as he floated within the darkness.

`That is up to you to find out. Your decision will affect things much more than you think. So you should think things through very carefully on how you are going to decide how you feel,' said the voice in an eerie way.

Van was completely confused about what the strange voice meant. "What do you mean by that?" asked Van but the voice didn't respond. It appeared that it was no longer even around. `What was it talking about, and why is it so important for me to be able know my feeling?" Van asked himself. He looked around to take in his surrounding but there was nothing in the room.

`Tell me Van, what is it that you feel for Fiona?' came the voice once again startling Van greatly as he once again looked around for the voice. `It is no use looking for me. In this world I am everywhere, yet at the same time I am nowhere. Take some time to think over my question,' said the voice as it once again disappeared.

*****

Fiona sat beside Van making little noise and just staring at his calm face. She could not believe that this had happened to him of all people just because he wanted to protect her. "Why did this have to happen?" Fiona asked herself looking at Van. "Please be ok Van. I don't know what I would do if I was to lose you," said Fiona as a lone tear fell down the said of her face and landed on the sheet next to Van's hand. Van had been like this for the past few days and has yet to be able to wake up.

While Fiona sat by Van's side Moonbay, Irvine, and Thomas were watching her. "Fiona sure seems to be taking this hard. I have never seen her look that way before," said Irvine as he looked over Moonbay's shoulder to see Fiona and Van.

"I have seen her look something like this but not nearly as bad. When you and Van went to fight the deathstinger, Fiona yelled out to Van telling that she always believed in him and then she collapsed in a fit of tears. It looked pretty bad. Then when he came back she was all happy again," said Thomas although he didn't really like the thought of how much Fiona loved Van.

"Maybe someone should go and talk to her. If she keeps up the way that she is currently acting then she will more than likely get sick. She isn't eating or sleeping so that is always a good chance of happening," said Moonbay with worry for her friend..

"I will go and talk to her," said Thomas with a smile as he was about to march into the room but Moonbay grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and dragged him back to his original position.

"She doesn't need you pathetic attempts at trying to flirt with her," growled Moonbay in frustration since she knew that that was what Thomas would more than likely end up doing. "Why not let me talk to her, girl to girl. I am sure that that is what she needs most of all at this moment," said Moonbay with a smile as she stood in the doorway.

"Fine, do whatever you want," grumbled Thomas as he sat against a wall and crossed his arms over his chest like a child refusing to do something or upset about not being given what he wanted..

Moonbay walked into the room quietly and shut the door so that the other two couldn't listen in to their private conversation as well. `They are more than likely going to try and listen in,' thought Moonbay with a shrug as she walked up to Fiona and stood right next to her. "Hey Fiona. How are you feeling?" asked Moonbay quietly as she placed a comforting hand upon the girls shoulder..

"I'm fine. There is nothing to worry about," said Fiona in a tired voice, which proved that everything was not all right. It also didn't help that he head was drooping every five seconds. She was really tired but she didn't want to sleep because she was afraid that Van would wake up when she did and she wanted to see him when he woke up.

"Why don't you go and get some rest? You look absolutely exhausted, so it would be for the best if you were to do this. You are doing him no good by just sitting here not eating or sleeping," said Moonbay trying to get to Fiona so that she would listen a lot easier.

"I don't need to sleep. All I want to do right now is stay by Van's side until he wakes up. So please just drop the subject," said Fiona as her eyes closed slightly but she forced them open again.

"Fiona you should listen to me. I know that you love him but you should really get some rest. You don't need to stay by his side at every moment of the day and I don't see why you would put yourself through the stress of doing that," said Moonbay really worrying about her friend.

"It's all my fault that he is in the shape that he is in," said Fiona lowering her gaze to the floor. The guilt was overwhelming her at that moment that she felt she needed to stay by his side in order to get over it.

"What do you mean by that?" asked Moonbay in a curious voice. She was fully aware of what had happened that night and she couldn't see in any way why Fiona would put all of the blame for it happening upon herself.

"Van got hurt protecting me. It should be me that should be laying here but Van took the hit instead and now you see him as he is now. I can't stand seeing him get hurt because of me," said Fiona as more tears started to fall down her face.

"He might be hurt just seeing how you are acting right now by not eating or sleeping," said Moonbay knowing that it would more than likely get to Fiona, "So why don't you go and get some sleep. I will keep an eye out and if he wakes up than I will immediately come and tell you," said Moonbay trying to make a bargain with Fiona. Fiona gave a small nod out of defeat and Moonbay helped Fiona stand up and she walked her out the door. They walked past the two males who as Moonbay had thought were listening in to the best of their ability on the conversation and walked towards Fiona's room.

"You put way too much upon yourself sometimes. You should start to accept the truth behind things and stop blaming yourself. Van is a soldier and is bound to protect people with his life. He just works on protecting you more because he cares about you more than anyone else. He may not say it directly but it is easy to see it in his eyes," said Moonbay but she could tell that Fiona wasn't listening because she had fallen asleep. "At least you had an easy time getting to sleep, so sleep well and lets hope that Van is better by the time that you wake up," said Moonbay with a smile as she walked into Fiona's room and placed Fiona upon her bed.

*****

Fiona was having a dream and in it she saw things that she didn't want to, things that scared her half to death. There was that man Ryan with his sword in his hand. He was grinning at her and signaling for her to come to him.

Fiona refused to come to him and took a few steps back out of fear of what he would do. He only got angry at her and charged at her preparing to use his sword. Fiona fell backwards and shut her eye's preparing for the sword to kill her but it never came. She never felt the piercing of the sword within her body.

Fiona opened her eyes and saw that Van was in front of her with the sword going right through his stomach. Fiona tried to scream but no noise came out of her mouth. It didn't matter no matter how much she tried but she couldn't call out to him before Van ended up collapsing onto Fiona's lap with his blood getting all over her. Fiona still couldn't scream.

Suddenly three more figures were surrounding her. There were two tall figures and a shorter one. She couldn't see their shadowed faces and coward back in fear. There was something about them that scared her and it wasn't from the fact that she couldn't see who they were.

One of the faces stepped out of the shadows and it was someone Fiona hadn't seen before. Fiona found her voice and let off a scream as he pulled out a knife. The knife came down and was about to hit Fiona when…

*****

"Fiona! Wake up," yelled Moonbay upon seeing that her friend was having a nightmare. Fiona was screaming and yelling out something that was inaudible. She was shaking her hard trying to wake Fiona up. It was scaring Moonbay to see her friend in such a state as that. It was like she was in pain and scared at something at the exact same time.

Fiona's eyes shot open and she quickly sat up within her bed. Fiona found that she was covered in sweat and was breathing very hard and very fast. The next thing that she noticed was that everything was blurry and she felt very dizzy. She fell back down to the bed feeling very cold yet at the same times she felt very warm.

"Thomas you need to go and get a doctor as fast as possible," said Moonbay seeing Thomas standing in the doorway with a fear stricken face. "Fiona has a high fever and needs some help. So would you please quit standing there and go get a doctor like I told you to," yelled Moonbay quickly losing her patience with Thomas since he was just standing in the exact same spot. "Go!" yelled Moonbay at the top of her lungs, which startled him enough to get him going again.

"R-r-r-r-right," stuttered Thomas as he backed away from the doorway. After a few times of tripping up, he was able to get going and run down the halls before Fiona got worse or Moonbay strangled him for stalling out of shock.

Things seemed to get worse Fiona and she seemed to be slipping away from consciousness as the room continued to spin all around her. Her throat was becoming very sore because she now had a hacking cough that didn't seem to be letting up

"Hang on Fiona. A doctor is coming so just try to remain conscious until he gets here," said Moonbay in a worried tone as Fiona's eyes closed and she slowly slipped out of consciousness once again.

*****

"Will she be alright Doc?" Moonbay asked the doctor when he started to pack up his things after he took a good look over Fiona. Moonbay already knew that the cause was from Fiona staying up all night and not eating a single thing since Van fell into his coma but she needed to know if Fiona would be all right.

"She appears to have a high fever. She should be fine within a few days. As long as she rests up a bit. You may need to keep an eye on her just to make sure that she does that if what you said is actually the cause for all of this," said the doctor as he looked to the bed next to Fiona's that happened to contain Van since Moonbay brought Fiona to that room.

"Thank you for everything. I will make sure that she gets plenty of rest," said Moonbay looking upon her unconscious friends and then back to the doctor who gave a slight bow before he exited the room.

"Things sure have been chaotic lately First Van gets hurt and is put into the state that he is currently in and then Fiona goes and gets herself hurt out of worry for his well-being," said Irvine once the doctor had left the room.

"I know what you mean. Van gets hurt protecting Fiona and Fiona gets hurt looking after Van. It is amazing how much the two of them love each other yet will not say a thing of it to the other," said Moonbay with a shake of her head.

"When they wake up I will personally make sure that they get together so that all this could just calm down a little because all of this craziness is really starting to get on my nerves," said Irvine as he sat in a chair looking up at the ceiling. "Why do you think it is that the two of them have such a hard time in telling the other about how they feel for each other?" asked Irvine looking at Moonbay.

"Fiona is just too shy and is afraid of what Van's response to her confession will be and Van is just too dense to see what he wants wanting to have him as well. It is an endless cycle that can get upon a persons nerves very quickly," said Moonbay as she rubbed her forehead. `I guess I am just like Fiona in a way,' thought Moonbay taking a quick look at Irvine.

*****

Van felt that something was very wrong at that moment so he tried to wake up but for some reason no matter how hard he tried, he was unable to wake up. "Damnit," growled Van as he sat in the darkness that he had become accustomed to.

`I thought that I told you that it is no use trying to wake up,' came that voice in his head again. That earned a growl from Van because Van was getting annoyed at how the voice was being so secretive around him

"Who are you?" asked Van as he looked around although he knew that he wouldn't find anything. He hated being alone in this place with only the strange voice around him yet it was not telling him anything useful.

`I am you or a bit more precisely your mind,' said the voice with a hint of amusement in it. "I know all about what is going on and I am your only way out of this place," said the voice in a calm tone.

"Then why can't I wake up? I want to go back to my friends and to…" said Van but he then realized what he was about to say and it shocked him to realize what was going through his head. "Fiona," said Van in a quiet voice as he starred at where a floor should have been if he wasn't in this strange place.

`I am glad to hear that, but I have my reasons as to why I can't let you out at this moment. In the end though I am sure that you will thank me for putting you through this,' said the voice.

"Do you know what is going on exactly then?" Van asked trying to take advantage of this moment to find out a few things about why he was here and why he couldn't leave even if he knew that his mind wasn't going to let up some of that information very easily.

`I know just as much as you do. So it is pointless to ask. If you dig deep within yourself then you should be able to find out the answers on you own,' said the voice as it echoed all around the area.

"I want to know what is going on right now," said Van growing more and more annoyed by the second with each non-answered questions that he was giving out. "Please just tell me," begged Van wanting to get out of that place as soon as possible.

`You will know what my intents are at some point, but you have to wait until that time comes. This shouldn't be taken so lightly, your future is what really depends on you to think about the meaning of why you are here,' said the voice before it disappeared once again leaving Van by himself..

*****

Moonbay was putting a wet towel on Fiona to try and cool her down. "Poor Fiona she did this to herself pretty much. She should have eaten more and got some sleep and all of this could have been avoided," said Moonbay in a sad and regretful tone thinking she should have made Fiona go to sleep and eat something much earlier than when she did. `Maybe then this could have been avoided as well,' thought Moonbay sadly.

"She blames herself for what happened to Van. I don't think that though," said Thomas, "Van was only protecting her from someone out to kill her. It is him who I blame," said Thomas who didn't want to think of anyone else being blamed for what happened to his beloved Fiona.

"I disagree because he did the right thing in trying to protect her. Fiona doesn't like how he got hurt protecting her when she feels she should have been the one to take the blow instead of Van," said Moonbay as she took off the wet cloth and then dipped in into the water again before she placed it back on.

"It doesn't matter if she doesn't like it because Van will most likely keep on protecting her until one of them dies," said Irvine knowing that that it was very true since he knew that they cared for each other that deeply.

"Let's just hope it ends up being old age rather than one dying because of a problem that the other is having. If one was to die then I wouldn't be surprised if the other one killed themselves just to be with the other," said Moonbay thinking of all the scenarios that could do that to one of the two..

"I agree but I highly doubt that the other one would go that far," said Irvine as he laid back in his seat putting his feet up on another one of the seats that was close to him. "It is always a possibility though," said Irvine reluctantly.

*****

"What exactly are we waiting for? It is getting extremely boring here and I want to get out of here and go back to my friends," said Van as he yelled throughout the large area of blackness. He really wanted his questions answer but he was not getting any response from the strange voice so far, but this time it was different.

`We are waiting for a sign for a sign like I have told you the past tree hundred times,' said the voice only earning a growl from an annoyed Van. `You aren't even ready yet to go back into the outside world. What I have to give to you is a power far greater than anything you have ever felt. All you really need to do is be patient and listen,' the voice said

Suddenly Van started to hear voices when he did exactly like the voice had told him to. "What is that? What is it that I am hearing right now?" asked Van as he listened carefully to what it was that was echoing throughout the place.

`It is your friends idiot. I am surprised that you were able to realize that in the first place,' said the voice with a hint of amusement. He then realized a mistake with what he said because if he was to calm Van stupid then he would be calling himself stupid but he decided to not say anything because he was sure that Van didn't realize that.

"But where is Fiona's voice? I can hear Moonbay's, Irvine's, and Thomas's voice but Fiona voice seems to be absent," said Van a little worried because Fiona was almost always around when Van was.

"She is currently sick and is unconscious with a very high fever. She will be all right but she needs a lot of rest and is currently sleeping I the bed that is right next to yours,' said the voice as a picture quickly shot up and the went down but Van could see what it was and it worried him.

"Oh no, Fiona. She seemed just fine when I feel unconscious so how did this happen to her? Please, I must know what happened," yelled Van with a very worried expression on his face.

`You should be worried because she became sick by staying at your side since you first came into your current state. She didn't eat or sleep. She only wanted to stay at your side until you woke up,' said the voice as if it was an easy thing to say but it wasn't. `You have to admit her devotion is admirable. I guess that is why we like her so much,' said the voice in a kind tone.

Suddenly an image appeared of Fiona a few feet in front of Van and he stared at it with an expression on his face that he had never shown before, it was one of genuine love even though he didn't admit it to himself.

`The problem is that you never bothered to do anything. There are so many things that could happen because of that,' said the voice as Van took a few steps towards the image. He was about to touch it when it disappeared. `This is what will happen if you don't try anything,' said the voice with no sarcasm but a voice filled with worry and caring. `She might leave your life forever,' said the voice but this time it was very quiet almost like the voice was afraid to say it.

Van just stood still with his hand still in the air in the area where the image of Fiona once stood. His heart was slowly registering what his mind had been talking to him about for so long. The fear of losing Fiona was starting to make him hurt on the inside and Van couldn't make it go away. `Could it be that I do love Fiona?' Van asked himself as he slowly retracted his hand away from where Fiona's image once stood.

`Do you see it yet? Do you feel it yet?' asked the voice is so solemn a tone that it startled Van slightly because in all the time that Van had been here he had never heard the voice talk in such a way.

"I-I'm not sure," stuttered Van in utter shock, which was so unlike him. Van usually felt pretty confident in his decisions that he didn't really doubt himself a whole lot but this time it was different. He didn't know what to think because he was so confused with his feelings

*****

"How are the two of them doing today?" asked Irvine walking in with a cup of coffee in his hands. He took a look around and realized that his question was a really stupid one. Yet it didn't really stop Moonbay from answering his question anyways.

"Neither has woken up and Fiona's fever has gone down but it is still pretty high. It will probably still be a while before any of them wake up," said Moonbay in a sad and depressed tone and through tired eyes.

"Ok, I'll take over now. You go get something to eat and get some rest. We don't need you to turn out like these two," said Irvine pointing at the beds holding both Van and Fiona.

"Thanks, I could definitely use the sleep," said Moonbay with a yawn and then she stood up and started to leave. Just before she left she took one look at both of her friends and frowned. She saw that Van was very still without the slightest movements but Fiona seemed a little uneasy. `I hope they get better,' thought Moonbay sadly before she walked out of the door before Irvine took the seat that she had been sitting in only a few moments before.

*****

It was the same dream again for Fiona, the exact same terrifying dreams that woke her up that night that she became sick. He was there again with his fingers that were indicating for her to come to him but Fiona was frozen in her spot. He got angry and placed the sword into his hand and he readied himself to strike. He jumped forward with Fiona too afraid to move but yet again Van jumped in the way like last time.

"No Van don't," said Fiona trying to move him out of the way but her hand only went right through him. She saw as he was once again stabbed and fell limply into her arms, which were now able to touch him. "Van, Van. Please don't die, you can't die" said Fiona as more and more tears continued to fall down her face. She held onto his cold hands, as all life seemed to be draining out of him.

"Fi…o…na," said Van weakly as he reached up and carefully touched Fiona's face. There were a few more words that he spoke but Fiona was unable to hear them for some reason. She had no idea what he had said but after he said it he went limp, his hand falling to the ground, and he took a last breath before he ceased to move.

"No, no, no, no. This can't be happening," repeated Fiona being unable to believe what she was seeing once again. Tear ran down her face as she just stared at his still form more afraid than she had ever been in her life.

That other man once again took his place in front of Fiona again and pulled out the very shape knife. He prepared to strike with a smirk on his face. He raised the dagger above his head and then brought it down at full speed towards Fiona.

*****

Fiona's eyes shot open before it hit her and she found herself in a bed with Irvine leaning back in a chair with his feet on the table. Then she saw Van in the bed next to her in the same way he was the last time she saw him. `It was all just a dream, a dream,' Fiona repeated to herself in her mind as a cold sweat on her face. `Why do I keep having that dream?' Fiona asked herself.

Irvine immediately noticed when Fiona woke up but he also noticed the scared look cross her face and she it made him curious as to what was the cause of it but he decided to not bring it up unless Fiona felt like talking about it. "I see that you finally decided to wake up. How are you feeling Fiona?" asked Irvine not leaving the position that he was in.

"Much better, thank you for asking," said Fiona putting a fake smile on her face so as to not alarm her friend. A headache suddenly struck Fiona and she felt dizzy for a few seconds before she managed to pull herself together and shake off the headache for at least a few moments.

Irvine saw her little dizzy spell and immediately assumed that it was from not eating all of these days. "It is good to see that you are awake. It would be a good idea if you go get something to eat or you will end up feeling worse once again and I am sure that that is something that nobody once to see again. You gave us all quite a scare when it happened," said Irvine in a brotherly tone.

Fiona took one look at Van and decided that that might be for the best because she didn't want van to see her in such a poor condition like she was last time. She attempted to get up to go and eat something but fell down because of a tremendous headache that she had suddenly came back full force. She laid down with her head on the pillow because it helped to sooth her headache a lot.

"Never mind, you shouldn't push yourself too much right now. I will go and get you something and be right back," said Irvine as he got out of his chair and left the room with a smile on his face. "Oh, by the way, what is it that you want to eat?" asked Irvine quickly taking a look back into the room.

"Just get me what sounds good there," Fiona whispered in a tired voice. "Thank you Irvine," said Fiona looking at him to see him give a slight nod before he walked away and left Fiona alone. She then took a long look at Van hoping that he would wake up soon before she closed her eyes to get a short rest while Irvine got her something to eat.