Fan Fiction ❯ A look into my life ❯ The beginning ( Chapter 1 )

Hello!!!!! This is something that I have been thinking of doing for sometime. It's set up as if you were reading her dairy. Ok before you press that `back' button, at least give it a try. Thanks. Oh and the ideas in here are NOT mine. If you get offended by anything she says don't flame me because of it. Enjoy!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~

Entry 1

Hey there!

This will be the first time I write in you. I know if you were real you would think who cares…but I guess I like thinking that you are a person that I'm writing to. It makes me feel as if someone is listening and doing nothing else. Anyway to get on with other things…My name would be Sara. I guess I could give you a name but I don't feel like it at the moment. I bought you today; I had finished my other dairy 4 days ago.

So let me begin… where to start. Well we could start with the day's events. Yes that's what we will do. Today started out like any other. I got up, took a shower, bickered with my mother over not wanting breakfast (she thinks that I'm going to die if I miss even one meal). So I ate a bite or two of the eggs she had made and that stopped her bickering.

John came over. Oh I haven't said who John is! He is the guy I like. He thinks that I just like him as a friend but I would like to be much more with him. If things go my way we will be just that, more than friends. Anyway he came over, we talked but nothing really happened. Although he did tell me of the girl that he liked. (I was thinking, too bad I'm not that person…) The girl he likes is a friend of mine also. Her name is Jennie. Little does he know that she doesn't like him. I feel sorry for him, I really do and one of these days I'm going to tell him.

It hurt to hear about how much he wanted her. How he was thinking of asking her out. As he babbled about her, I thought of how much he would be hurt to know that she really liked his brother and not him. His brother, Ryan, doesn't really care for any girl. In fact he thinks that love is stupid. Jennie doesn't know this but I do. He once told me that I was very pretty and that he wouldn't mind fucking me. That's when he told me that he didn't care for love, but that he would do anything to get sex. After that I kept a close eye on Ryan, knowing all to well how he got girls in bed with him.

I was so lost in thought that I didn't realize that John had asked me a question. I studied his face for a moment and then decided that I should nod. The question being most likely about Jennie. I felt really stupid the moment he re-asked the question… `Really? You like someone? Who?' I wondered for a moment if I should tell him that it was him that I had liked for so long but decided against it. I changed the subject, not really liking the idea of lying to him for any reason.

A few hours later he left. I had found out enough about the things he liked about Jennie, to the point that I could be quizzed on the subject and pass with flying colors. My mother came out of her room where she had been hiding and listening to our conversation. My mother gave me a hard time about not telling John that I liked him. She babbled on about how stupid he was to like Jennie over me, how stupid he was for not realizing that I liked him.

She had once suggested that I go out with his brother, who she said had a liking to me. (Little did she know what that liking that was). Ahhhh!! And here I am talking about people babbling, when I'm doing the same thing! Well today has been the same kind of day that I usually have... but tomorrow will be a different kind of day. Mark will be coming home from his trip. I don't know but something about him isn't right. I told my mother once that I thought that he was weird, but she liked him too much to listen. Grrrrrrr…..I don't like it when my mother's boyfriend is around. Well I must get some sleep. `Night...Sara.

Entry 2

Hey!

Sorry that I haven't written in you for sometime now. Nothing was really happening. I don't like writing when there isn't really anything to write about…but today there is. Mark has started doing things…Things that I don't like. I don't think that anyone would like this. He started touching me and trying to peek when I changed or took a shower. I don't want to tell my mother. She is the kind of person that would think that it was all her fault. Plus, I can take care of it.

It hasn't gotten to bad so it won't take much to stop it. Nothing much else has happened. Jennie came over and told me about Ryan. (Thinking that I didn't know anything about him) I got so mad at her… She had told me that she knew that John liked her and that she might use him to her advantage. I told her about Ryan. Not everything but enough to get the idea of using John out of her head. I told her how he thinks love is stupid at the age he is at now.

Jennie was shocked for a moment then countered on how she could change him. I had to hold back my laughter. From what I had seen in the years of knowing him, there was no way to change him. I told her that that was stupid of her to think that you could change a person. She wouldn't listen, and that's what I hate, when people won't listen to what you are saying! She said that she would be able to and that I didn't know anything on the matter. That I didn't know him the way she did. HAHA!!! If anything I know him better than her!

She got me angry. So I sat there not telling her anything that she could argue with. She babbled on about how she could change him and I listened. Knowing that when he broke her heart she would run to me, and tell me that it didn't work. Then I could say I told her so and that she should've listened. I was so angry that I made up an excuse so that she would leave. She did so willingly but later that day I had regretted her leaving because I was home alone with Mark. He made excuses for touching me, like `opps I'm so sorry I didn't mean to bump into you'. But I know he did, he made it clear with a part of him I felt against my belly button more than once.

So I stayed in my room where he wouldn't dare come. And now hours later I'm still in here, writing in you. I know how I'm going to take care of this; next time he does something I'll hurt him. It will be like training a dog.

My plans for getting John are all set, now all I need is for him to ask Jennie out. When he asks her she will say `no'. John will come to me saying `that no one likes him' at that point I will tell him `I do'. He will think it over and hopefully find that he likes me too. Although now I have a new problem, Mark will not want this to happen. He has already made it painfully clear that he doesn't want me to be with anyone. That will go away after I train him though. Well for now I'm going to go to bed.

Sara

Entry 3

Yo!

It has been only a few days since last time that I wrote in you. Nothing much has been happening, only reason that I'm writing in you is that I'm bored. So I guess I'm going to be babbling. (Bear with me) I guess I could talk about the things in my head.

Men…you can't really understand them-just like everything else. You can't really know anything 100% and that's what we do. For our whole life we try to know everything about everything, and men are one of the things that we try to understand a 100%. Don't get me wrong we all do it. People even try to know everything about women. Everyone is different and everyone is the same. Where I'm going with this, I don't know. Men just don't get it (neither do women but I'll write about that later) Men feel as if they have to fix everything, don't get me wrong they might say `no that's not true' but it is. Women just want someone to listen to them bicker about life. Men mess it up by suggesting things or worse, doing things.

The thing is that we just want someone to listen to us, because through out the day no one does. We might say we hate something happening but we won't get rid of it too fast. If we did that, we wouldn't be able to bicker about it. It's weird, huh? I tried explaining this to both Jennie, and Alex. (Alex being the younger brother of Jennie and best friend of John) Alex thought that I was smoking something and Jennie thought that I was trying to confuse her.

I guess I should do women too. Women try to know everything. It doesn't matter to us that it isn't our business, if we know any little thing about that thing then we want to know everything about it. Take the subject of men, we try to know everything. When we bicker we don't want someone to tell us what to do, we just want to be heard. It's…..something like wanting to know that people know that we are here. Too bad we picked bickering to prove our point. We don't just bicker to men ether; we do it to everyone that we feel close enough to.

Now, if you were real you would say `no, that's not true', or `you know nothing'. Well I might not! Because like everyone else, I don't know 100% of anything. Another thing that is funny is that we judge. It isn't our place to judge, or at least I think that. Yet, that is the fault of every human. If anyone said different they would be lying.

Well this was fun, writing you about this. What else to write about? Well looking over what I have wrote I think that I have written enough for now.

Sara.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ok now if you want to press the `back' button go ahead, but review before you do. Oh and there isn't any descriptions of what the people look like because you are supposed to decide what they look like for your self. Thanks!