Fan Fiction ❯ Eiji and Kikan Present: The Randomness ❯ To Kaik a Little Kaid� ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Completely random flare-ups from both Eiji and Kikan in the middle of all of their conversations. Realise that it took them a little over a few seconds to think of these on cue. Enjoy our brilliance, punks.

Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 03.03.2006 | Pages: 4 | Words: 2.7K | Visits: 384 | Status: Work In Progress

. -.:.-

Bold= Eiji

Italics= Kikan

-.:.-

Little Kid:"Get him, Jesus!!"

Santa: *deep voice* "No candy for you, bitch."

Little Kid: "Ahh, fuck you. You NEVER give me what I want for christmas."

Santa: *deep voice, again* "That's because you're a filthy little sesspot of youth, and everyone hates you."

Kid: "Sure. Laffy Taffy?"

Santa: *Anna Nicole Smith voice* "Well, sure! Make me b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l..."

~Kikan

-.:.-

"What the hell is that?"

"It's my new helper monkey."

"What do you need help with, exactly?"

"Nothing, but chicks will think he's cute and therefore, spend time with me..."

"That only works with dogs, asshole..."

"Aw crap! I spent 400 bucks for nothing?!"

"400 bucks?! Where'd you get 400 bucks?"

"Borrowed your credit card."

"I'm gonna kill you!"

-Eiji

-.:.-

"Don't you DARE throw your sister at that aligator!"

"But muh, it'll be so cool!"

"But nothing, Cornwall-Bartholomew Jackson III, if I wanted you to throw anything to the alligators, it would be your attitude!"

"...Huh. That' s exactly what daddy says when you go for the drink."

"Your father knows nothing. Now shut up and go refill my bottle in the mini-bar, you little bastard. Mommy loves you!”

~Kikan

-.:.-

Moyer: Why are we going to a Vandan military base.

Nieka: To blow it up, why else?

Moyer: Why am I here?

Nieka: Because you're my husband and won't let anything happen to me.

Moyer: Why's Ichiro here?

Nieka: Because Israto didn't want to come alone.

Israto waves.

Moyer: Hey, as long as it's a good reason.

-Eiji

-.:.-

"Suh-WING batter batter batter batter...Suh-WING batter batter-"

"You DO realise of course that this is a volleyball match..."

"Of course. Everybody knows that."

"Then why do you keep screaming something related to baseball?"

"Because. I want all these girls to get to at least second base."

"Aww! It's good to hear someone is so into school pride for their team! Good for you!"

"...I meant with each other..."

"Jerk, THAT'S MY DAUGHTER."

~ Kikan

-.:.-

"Hey, guess what?"

"What?"

"The princess totally made a pass at me."

"No way! You?"

"Yep, I'm that smoove."

"What did she say, exactly?"

"Well, I was just sittin, doin' my guard thang. And she gave me the key to her chamber and told me to meet her at midnight."

"...I hate you..."

"I know."

"... When you're done with that... can I-"

"Get in line, Mo-fo."

Sees RANKS of guards behind them.

-Eiji