Fan Fiction ❯ Elves Make For Strange Bedfellows ❯ "Mer & Pip"; Justified & Stripped! ( Chapter 6 )

Chapter: 6 - "Mer & Pip"; Justified & Stripped!

Their journey seemed to pass fairly quickly as they chatted amongst themselves for the duration of the afternoon. Felicity soon noticed that they were coming upon the border of the forest. She stopped for a moment and looked back at Kimber. There was a slight look of panic in her eyes as she thought of their last journey to this neck of the wood.

"Help," she mouthed. Kimber knew without much thought the sudden anxiety that consumed her sister.

"I cannot go any further!" Kimber blurted out, a little flustered, as she did not like bringing attention to herself.

Frodo looked upon her with concern," Why? What is the matter?" He questioned anxiously. Merry and Pippin turned to her attentively.

"We have walked all day and have not rested once! Let us camp here for the night. I would like to clean up. It has been two days since I last bathed and I can no longer take the smell of myself!" she giggled.

Felicity smiled and nodded in agreement. She too longed for soothing springs and a moment's peace. "We are near the borders of Lorien now and just beyond that ridge lay the hot springs of Telore. We will be but a moment," she promised.

"My ladies, I am sorry that we have not taken such things into consideration. We will camp here for tonight. Legolas and I will escort you to the watering hole." Aragorn obliged the two sympathetically.

"Watering hole? Are we horses?!" Felicity laughed.

"I would never refer to either of you in such a way!" Aragorn returned, laying his pack on the ground. "Come Legolas! Let us take them to the springs."

"Oh no you don't" Merry piped up, running to Kimber's side. "We will take the fairies to the springs! You and Legolas this, you and Legolas that! We found them, we saved `em and now we will escort them to the springs, the hobbits!" he announced proudly with Pippin now joining his side.

"Right then!" Frodo smiled anxiously as he readied himself to go.

"Um… by that I mean the hobbits that found them!" he continued. Frodo looked at Felicity who was now glaring at the two outspoken hobbits. How long would she have to put up with their incessant nonsense! She looked at Frodo. He could only offer her a look of lament for he desired her company as much as she desired his. But he offered no argument; he already knew that as determined as they were, Merry and Pippin would not lose this one.

"Very well then, be on your way," Aragorn sighed.

Kimber quite happy with said arrangements eagerly took her place in between the two hobbits.

"Lead the way my dear sister," Kimber sang, "This part of the forest is your area of expertise."

"I suppose" Felicity trudged ahead of them, glancing back at Frodo who looked at her and then to Samwise who had begun to mumble something about not having a bite to eat all day.

The four of them toddled along a well-trodden path before they happened upon the springs.

The air around them hung heavy with humidity and the sweet smell of lilac blossoms filled the air.

"Well here we are." Felicity sighed.

"This is splendid!" Kimber gasped as she looked around. The foliage all around was in full bloom; snapdragons and orange blossoms bordered the springs, which boasted a calescent mist. A magnificent waterfall provided a picturesque backdrop for the springs, which frothed and yet at the same time offered an air of tranquility. "How did you find this place?" her sister wondered.

"Haldir brought…" Felicity began but did not finish the thought.

"Haldir?!" Kimber raised an eyebrow. She hadn't realized that her sister had developed such a friendship with the elf.

"It makes no never mind," she interrupted before turning to the hobbits, "Merry and Popeye?" she motioned for them to turn around.

"Oh right, ladies need their privacy!" Merry conceded.

"It's Pippin!" his comrade retorted before turning around.

Kimber and Felicity were making their way over to the springs when suddenly Felicity stopped and made motion to a nearby bushel of greenery.

"Kimber what might that be? I have never seen it grow in our part of the wood; it looks like spinach."

"Spinach?" Kimber scoffed "I wouldn't eat that my dear sister! Lest you would like to lose your senses, for that is Chabox, best to steer clear of that one,' she insisted.

"Poisonous is it?" Felicity inquired.

"No, not really. I don't have much experience with it but the elders told me that it is of no good use, catch my drift?" Kimber replied, slipping her clothing over her head and stepped lightly toward the springs. Felicity paused for a moment.

"I am going to gather some bathing salts, lilacs and such. I will return", she promised. Kimber nodded and stepped gingerly into the parching springs.

Felicity doubled back toward the hobbits. "Master Pippin?" he wheeled around unable to believe his ears.

"Did you hear that Merry! She is finally coming around! Yes my fair sweet?" he extended a hand to her.

"You have my humblest apologies for disrespecting you in our journey thus far, and for that I come bearing you this…peace offering," she smiled coyly extending to them a hand full of Chabox.

"Why what is this?!" Merry beamed inspecting the pert leaves. He smelled them intensely; the aroma was rich.

"Just a little something I picked up. It may not be as good as the pipe weed of The Shire but it should suffice," Felicity replied.

"Pippin did you here that! They have pipe weed in fairyland too!" Merry beamed as he reached into his breast pocket and pulled out his pipe. Pippin taking heed pulled his out as well without a moment lost.

"Enjoy!" Felicity smirked as she turned and headed back to the springs.

"Just when I thought she was a lost cause," Pippin grinned and nodded to himself, "She's made me proud! She even called me Master did you hear her Merry?" he beamed.

Merry only nodded as he anxiously packed the herb into his pipe.

"I forgot how hot these springs could be!" Felicity winced, stepping into the febrile springs.

"Well Felicity they're not called the cold springs" Kimber giggled. Felicity smiled at her sister's quirky sense of humor.

"Alright there Kimber, don't hurt yourself," Felicity smiled as she continued into the hot water.

"Merry?" Pippin tugged at his collar, "are you hot?" he sighed.

"Yes Pip! Who turned up the heat!" he agreed.

"I feel as though the sun is sitting right on my shoulders," Pippin slurred as he began to clumsily remove his shirt and trousers.

"Pip? What is it your doin' there?" Merry puffed a ring of smoke. He gazed upon his comrade with glassy eyes for a moment before joining him in the buff.

"Ah now that's a might better," Merry agreed staggering over to a nearby tree; he slumped down next to the trunk. Pippin trying to steady himself, puffed heartily at his pipe before gravity took hold of him and sent him toppling over next to Merry. Crawling over to where Merry sat, he leaned against the tree as well.

"Now how do you suppose they `growed' those giant potatoes around here?" Pippin motioned to a boulder a might 5 feet from them.

"Beats me, Pip! I suppose the same ways that they grows them big oilyphants over there," he nodded pointing to a large rose bush blowing in the breeze.

"Did you say oilyphants?" Pippin attempted a whisper but his voice rang through Merry's ear.

"Quiet now! He will hear us. SHHH!" he attempted to put a finger to his lips but missed and ended up in a nostril instead.

"Now why do you suppose that oilyphant is pink?" Pippin wondered staring at the bush.

"We need to be very still," Merry leaned over to his friend "or it will pick up our se… se... sce, smell okay?" he whispered. Having said that the two stared intently at the bush for a moment when suddenly it rustled a bit, sending the hobbits running for their lives.

"Why do you tease me so?" Kimber inquired.

"Kimber I am your sister, must we go over this again and again, I would rather talk about something more interesting!"

"Like?" Kimber couldn't readily imagine what Felicity was getting at.

"How about the elf and the way he keeps winking at you," Felicity smiled at her sister whose face was now the shade of a raspberry.

"What are you talking about?" Kimber stuttered.

"Don't play dumb with me Kimber. I am not as oblivious to my surroundings as you are!" she sighed now lying back in the waters.

"Felicity?!" Kimber retorted.

"Just answer the question, did you let him…"

"Felicity!" Kimber interrupted with haste. If her face could have gotten much redder it would have at this point. "What about you and Frodo?" she interjected "Or better yet, how about you and Haldir, hmm…?"

"We are not talking about Frodo, nor are we talking about Haldir. We are talking about you and the elf! Now spill it!" she demanded.

Kimber was just about to open her mouth and offer an explanation when from it came a scream. Felicity turned in haste to see what Kimber was hollering about when she was suddenly engulfed by what seemed to be a tidal wave. The two hobbits gasped for air and splashed about wildly for a moment before Felicity waded over and tried to help them gain their footing. Kimber stood motionless with her hands covering her bareness.

"A little help here!" Felicity stammered as Pippin arms flailed about, "Get that thing off of me!" she chuckled, causing Kimber to rethink her decision to offer a hand.

"Did you see em'!! BIG OILYPHANTS!!" Merry raved as Kimber pulled his head above the water. She looked around them and saw no `oilyphants', or elephants for that matter. Seeing the hobbits to their feet, Kimber scrambled once again to cover herself, though they took no notice as with great commotion they darted off into the wood.

"Oh my! Felicity what do you suppose that was all about?" Kimber bellowed. She looked upon her sister who could hardly contain herself. She was laughing as she had never laughed before…

"Did you…see…that?" Felicity gasped for breath.

"What could have come over them?" Kimber's eyes widened, "Felicity?" she began when suddenly the sound of footsteps heading in their direction silenced her.

Much to their horror the likes of Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli, Boromir, Frodo and Sam came bounding through the bushes to the springs. Felicity and Kimber lowered themselves into the water in effort to hide their nudity.

"Felicity! Kimber!" Aragorn hurried over to the water's edge as the rest of the fellowship looked on "Are you alright?! We heard you screaming!" he continued.

"The hobbits were naked and they…" Kimber quickly began. The thought of all that happened was causing her to become flustered once more.

"What did you say?" Legolas raised a brow in disbelief at the two engulfed by the springs.

"We were bathing here in the springs when suddenly Merry and Pippin came running through with no clothes on and jumped in here with us and then they took off through the wood screaming something about oilyphants!" Kimber regained her composure, though barely, as she was quite embarrassed with her present company. She blushed as Legolas offered her a grin.

"Pink oilyphants!" Felicity laughed nonchalantly, as she circled Kimber in the tepid waters keeping her eye upon Frodo. He was trying to keep his eyes focused on the trees and such but found that they kept wandering back to the springs. His face reddened when Felicity caught him looking at her.

"Where are the hobbits now?" Gimli gruffed "Should've known better than to let them escort the maidens here! Seems wherever they go…" he began before Aragorn interrupted him.

"Gimli now is not the time for this. If they are in danger, then we must find them," he announced. "Legolas, you, Gimli and the hobbits will stay here while Boromir and I go and look for Merry and Pippin."

"No, I think that I shall stay here," Boromir replied, a seductive grin came upon his face as thoughts of the two naked women filled his mind. Legolas shot him a look of threat.

"You will come with me!" Aragorn demanded harshly, grabbing Boromir by the arm as he then turned to head into the forest when suddenly the sentinels of Lorien surrounded them.

"Felicity, Kimber?!" Rumil inched slowly over to the springs, his bow drawn and pointed at the fellowship.

"Are you both alright?" questioned Orophin joining him.

"We are fine." Felicity reassured them.

"Who are these intruders? Have they caused you harm in any way?" Rumil looked at Kimber who simply shook her head. Though not wanting to look at Legolas, she did. He stood attentively with his bow drawn at Orophin who was extending his hand for Felicity to take.

"We are well and no harm has come to us. These travelers are with us," she conceded. "And if it pleases you, we will wait to exit the waters after present company departs," she replied; now looking at Orophin.

"Yes." Kimber agreed.

Aragorn extended his hand to Rumil causing him to raise his bow once more. Putting up both hands he indicated that he meant them no threat before speaking. "I am Aragorn son of Arathorn. This is Legolas, Prince of Mirkwood, Boromir son of Denethor, Dwarf Gimli son of Gloin, and Frodo and Samwise both of Hobbiton. We are friends of Kimber and Felicity and as of late we have lost two other halflings, for that is the commotion we were all drawn to. We must find them as they might be in grave danger."

Orophin lowered his bow and motioned for his brethren to do the same. Legolas, though intimidated, looked on and admired the guardians of the golden wood.

"Please, we must not waste anymore time! Our friends might be in trouble!" Samwise spoke up from the rear with a look of concern that now engulfed him.

"Sam is right we must find them!" Frodo offered Rumil a pleading look. Rumil offered no immediate response; his only thoughts were of Kimber and Felicity and if they were indeed safe or just appeasing them for the moment.

"Orophin, you stay here while I go and find Haldir," he announced.

"There is no need," Kimber whispered, "For it appears that he has found us." She pointed to Haldir who was now coming over the clearing, his strong hands grasped firmly about the nape of the necks of the two naked hobbits in question. They marched obediently ahead of him with their hands folded modestly in front of their genitals. Hearing that, Felicity sank deeper into the springs hoping somehow that they would swallow her up.

"Do these belong to you?" Haldir offered, looking at Aragorn.

Aragorn shook his head in shame as he looked at the two naked hobbits standing before him. "Yes. I do apologize for any trouble that they may have caused you."

"They should be grateful that we did not shoot them!" Haldir said sternly as he cast his eyes down on Merry and Pippin, who were still glassy-eyed and giggling.

"I do not understand what has come over them, they were not like this when they left the camp!" Aragorn was growing more confused by the moment as he tried to figure out what could have possibly had happened during their short time apart. Perhaps Kimber and Felicity would know…

"Ladies?" Aragorn called looking to a now empty hot spring. "Now where did those two go?" he asked looking at Legolas.

"They were here a moment ago…Perhaps they snuck off while we all were distracted by…this" Legolas pointed at the halfings.

"Whom do you speak of?" Haldir began, "You are traveling with two women as well?"

"Well, yes and no." Aragorn replied, "Actually we are not sure what they are to be honest with you"

"They claim to be fairies of this Forest," Boromir offered sarcastically, "They are the one's that led us here."

A scowl slowly grew across Haldir's face. "FELICITY!!!" He yelled, his voice echoing throughout the forest, "FELICITY! KIMBER! COME OUT NOW!" Haldir now turned to his brothers Rumil and Orophin, "Where are they?"

Orophin hung his head low as he pointed to a large rock near the spring's waterfall. Rumil seeing his brother's concession elbowed him in disgust.

"I SAID COME OUT!" Haldir yelled once more. Everyone looked on and watched as Kimber peeked around the rock's edge. Her eyes grew wide with fear as she now saw Haldir staring back at her.

"KIMBER, SO HELP ME IF I HAVE TO COME IN THERE TO GET THE BOTH OF YOU, YOU WILL NOT LIVE TO SEE TOMORROW!" Kimber shuddered at the tone of his voice and slowly waded out from behind the rock. Looking back, she noticed that Felicity did not follow and still remained hidden.

"FELICITY! SHOW YOURSELF NOW!" Haldir, pushing Merry and Pippin towards Aragorn, made his way to the edge of the spring and was about to step in when Kimber objected, "No Haldir please!"

"I want both of you out…now!" Haldir demanded.

"We cannot!" Kimber pleaded.

"What do you mean you cannot?" Haldir was growing furious.

"They cannot come out for they are unclothed brother!" Rumil interjected.

"We will come out once everyone has left, I promise!" Kimber added.

"And you expect me to believe that you and your sister will not flee once there is no one around!" Haldir laughed.

"Y..e..s..s?" Kimber offered back.

"Kimber do you take me for a fool!" Haldir paused, as he began to contemplate the situation. "Rumil!" he called after a few moments, "I want you and the others to escort this group back to the flets!" He ordered before turning to Kimber and smiling, "I will remain here and make sure that our friends get out of the water safely!"

"With all due respect, Haldir, you are not known to us and therefore I cannot leave these women with you," Aragorn stated, for Kimber's uneasiness unnerved him.

"And what little I know of you Aragorn en Dunedain is not enough to trust you with such mischievous maidens, however if it pleases you, the elf that travels with your party may remain," Haldir conceded. Aragorn sighed and motioned to Legolas.

Felicity snickered from behind the rock as Kimber sank lower in the water. It was going to be hard enough to get out of the water with Haldir being there! Now she had to face Legolas as well!

Rumil, as ordered, lead the others back into the forest as Legolas and Haldir turned their attention back to Kimber.

"I suppose you want me to get out now?" she asked wearily.

"You are correct in supposing such things!" Haldir replied sarcastically.

"I...I..." she began to stutter while looking at Legolas, "I can't!"

Haldir rolled his eyes and sighed, "Kimber, I will make a deal with you. If you can get Felicity to come out of the water first, I shall leave so that you may do so as well."

"What about Legolas?" Kimber inquired further.

"That is up to him." Haldir again sighed impatiently.

Kimber looked to Legolas who smiled back at her reassuringly. "Fine!" she agreed and swam back behind the rock.

Felicity shot her a look of disgust as she came around to where her sister still hid. "Remind me never to let you negotiate in the future!"

"What!? I think I did very well!" Kimber rebuked, "Besides after learning today that you and Haldir have visited this spring before, I am sure that you are used to being around him in this stature?"

"Why you!" Felicity lunged at Kimber, pushing her underneath the water. Kimber soon resurfaced and gasped for air.

"Wait Kimber! You just wait! I will get you back for this!" Felicity growled swimming away.

"Ah, Felicity! So glad you could join us!" Haldir called out when seeing her swim out into the open.

"Save it Haldir! I am in no mood for your sarcasm right now!" Felicity shot back wading closer to the shore.

Pulling herself out of the water she noticed that neither male took their eyes off of her. "Like what you see boys!" she asked sharply and spun around giving them both a "show".

Legolas realizing that he was caught staring turned away with a slight blush. Felicity brushed by the two and headed to retrieve her clothes. While dressing, she noticed that Haldir was watching her every move. She tried to ignore the smirk on his lips and glanced down to see Kimber's clothes lying on the ground. "Payback!" she muttered under her breath with a grin!

"That's close enough," Felicity shot Haldir a look of warning as he now approached her.

"Oh come now, Felicity," he continued toward her, wanting to get a closer look and perhaps a feel of the goods. She walked passed him to where Kimber's clothes lay, picked them up and headed toward the spring, Legolas stood near the shore.

"Okay Kimber," Felicity called." I'll just toss your clothes near the water's edge," she continued.

"Alright, that's good; just make sure that everyone is gone okay?" Kimber replied.

"Okay," she smiled as she tossed them intentionally just a few feet in front of Legolas, he turned to leave, obeying Kimber's wishes, "Hang on there, elf boy, do you think you could move them closer for me?" Felicity coaxed. He nodded and and bent down to pick up the clothes which lay at his feet. As he did Felicity quickly approached him from behind and planted her foot squarely on his bottom sending him careening into the springs, he landed with a hefty splash right next to Kimber.

"You forgot these," Felicity grinned tossing in Kimber's clothes behind him. Haldir shook his head "Come Felicity! I think you have done enough!" as he took her arm to lead her away.

"I canwalk without your help!" she quickly removed her arm from his grasp.

"Felicity! I am no mood for your antics!" He grabbed her once more giving her a stern look; "You shall not leave my sights while you remain here, you cannot be trusted!"

Felicity struggled to free herself, but his grip was too strong.

"We shall wait for you just over that ridge" Haldir turned and called to Legolas and Kimber who still remained in the spring.

Legolas, furious with having been kicked into the water, acknowledged Haldir with only a nod of his head.

Soon after Felicity and Haldir's departure, he stood up and looked at Kimber, who had her head bowed down. He could tell that she was not too happy with what her sister had done. Slowly he waded over to her, collecting her clothing from the surface of the water as he went.

Kimber remained still as she listened to him coming towards her, hoping that she was covering herself well enough for him not to see.

"Here" he said quietly as he handed her clothes to her, "Get dressed so that we can be on our way."

Quickly she reached out and took her clothes from him, "Thank you."

Legolas, being a true gentleman, turned and waded back to the shore of the spring while Kimber put on the wet clothing. Soon she made her way out to Legolas who stood with his back still facing her.

"So! What will I have to do this time to recompense you for my sister's actions?" she smiled lightly, trying to lift his spirits.

Legolas turned around and looked at Kimber for a moment, before she offered, "Is another kiss in order?"

He was taken off guard as she now reached up placing a hand at the nape of his neck. She lowered his face to hers and kissed him. She sighed as she felt his soft lips against hers once more. This time she knew that she was not dreaming as he embraced her. She melted into him and parted her lips allowing him to explore her mouth for what seemed like forever. He drew from her; surprised and pleased with her actions he placed his hand upon her cheek.

"I am sorry," she blushed.

"For what are you apologizing, Kimber?" Legolas smiled. "In as much as you have longed for my lips since our last meeting so have I longed for yours," he continued. She bowed her head for a moment, Legolas sensing her uneasiness he offered "Now as for your sister," he looked down at his drenched clothing," Seems as though she has gotten both of us, so together we shall think of something," he nudged her playfully before taking her hand and leading her toward the ridge.

*********

"Now tell me, why does trouble seem to abound wherever you are?" Haldir inquired as he led Felicity the over the ridge. She offered him no reply, as her mind was busy thinking of how she could distract him long enough to get away.

"Don't bother, I am not even going to let that opportunity come to pass", almost as though he could read her thoughts, he smirked.

"Haldir, you don't have to hold onto my arm so tightly," she looked at his hand.

"Felicity you and I both know that I do," he interrupted, "And since you are now speaking to me perhaps you could explain to me what means you have traveling with such odd company?" he continued.

"What business is that of yours?" she chided.

"What business? Don't you think that by bringing them here you have made it my business?" he questioned her sternly.

"Would you have it any other way?" she retorted for if she knew nothing else about Haldir she knew that he liked to be in the thick of things, so to speak.

He squeezed her arm tighter now and pulled her closer to him, "Felicity," he hissed before realizing that Kimber and Legolas were now approaching them. Despite his annoyance with Felicity, Legolas did not appreciate Haldir's actions and offered him a disapproving look.

"Glad to see you have both made it, come now we will join the others," Haldir offered curtly leading them to the flets.