Fan Fiction ❯ Elves Make For Strange Bedfellows ❯ I'll Have Two Scoops Of Deception...And A Side Of Whoop Ass! ( Chapter 13 )

CHAPTER: 13 - I'll Have Two Scoops Of Deception...And A Side Of Whoop Ass!

"Is she okay?" Aragorn grew concerned as he now rushed over to where Felicity was holding Kimber and fanning her face.

"She is going to be fine Aragorn. She just fainted," Felicity tried to reassure him with a faint smile.

"You mean she ain't dead Felicity?" Sam looked a bit peeked as he looked upon the unconscious fairy.

Frodo, looked to his frightened friend, "Sam everything is going to be alright, please calm down," kneeling down to where Felicity was.

Sam inhaled deeply and let out a hefty sigh, "I don't understand Mister Frodo. Why would she faint at Rumil's proposal? I mean I thought she would've been excited!" Sam's look of lament suddenly gave way to confusion. He wondered then about Rosie and if she would do the same if he ever conjured up enough nerve to court her.

Rumil looked on at the group now hovering over his wife-to-be. He had no idea that she would be so excited with his proposal; "Maybe I should have waited until we were alone to ask her," he offered with a chuckle as he made his way over to them.

"Maybe you should not have asked her at all!" Felicity stated flatly.

"My apologizes Felicity, what did you just say?" Rumil gave her a puzzling look; perhaps he had not heard her correctly.

"Rumil, surely you have heard me correctly, my sister cares for you as a friend and nothing more." Felicity now looked up to him as he stood over her. "Her heart lies with another Rumil, not with you," she continued; a look of confusion came over his face.

"What do you mean her heart lies with another? She told me how she felt about us not even two nights ago!" Rumil snapped in protest.

"Rumil, does it please you to think that you know my sister better than I do, " she was now becoming a bit irritated at his ignorance, "remove your blinders," she insisted before catching a glimpse of Merry and Pippin out of the corner of her eye.

She focused her attention on Rumil. Though before she could utter any words, Merry and Pippin could be heard yelling as they approached the group, running with one of Sam's cooking pots. "Move out of the way!" they bellowed.

Rumil obliged quickly, allowing Felicity full view of the hobbits as they charged straight for Kimber; they were wobbling unsteadily as they carried the hefty pot, which Felicity now noticed was filled to the brim with water.

"Oh no! Wait!" Felicity exclaimed, though it was too late as they suddenly lost control and careened into she, Frodo and Kimber drenching the lot of them with water.

"Asses!" she yelled at the two; as they reminded her of a couple of stubborn mules; that took no notice of anything others said to them, "Why would you two do such a thing?" she was infuriated now.

"Trying to wake up Kimber," they both replied; sounding very pleased with themselves, despite the fact that their present company had endured an unwanted bath at their hands.

"Idiots!" Felicity spoke through gritted teeth as she wiped away the water running down her face. "Do you two ever stop to think before you do something?" She scolded them.

Merry and Pippin offered each other a look of confusion, before turning to her "Sorry Felicity. We were only trying to help." Merry offered her an apology.

"Felicity, honestly they meant us no harm. They only wanted to offer a hand; you know how much they care for you and Kimber." Frodo added justifying his friend's actions.

Felicity looked at Frodo who was smiling at her; drenched from head to toe as well. Maybe she was being a little too harsh she thought to herself before looking at them; their heads were hung low now.

"Merry, Pippin, I am the one who should be apologizing to you for my actions," she could not believe the very words she was uttering now.

They quickly snapped their heads up and offered her a smile, "That is okay Felicity, we understand how you must feel with Kimber fainting and all" Pippin offered sympathetically.

"Yeah, I would probably act the same if anything happened to Pip!" Merry added with a smile.

"We could be so lucky," Felicity muttered under her breath before returning a smile. She looked down now to see that Kimber was beginning to stir.

"Hey there sleepy head! How are you feeling?" Felicity asked as Kimber opened her eyes.

"Ah, alright I guess…" Kimber groaned, "What happened? And why am I all wet?"

Felicity let out a small laugh, "I will tell you later; right now you should be still and rest."

Kimber lay there for a few moments trying to recall what had happened, but her thoughts were cloudy, with the exception of a few visions of Rumil and Legolas. Rumil and Legolas, Rumil and Legolas; Oh my Gosh-it had come rushing back to her all at once…

"Legolas, where is Legolas?" Kimber sat up abruptly only to find herself becoming dizzy with the sudden movement.

Frodo quickly caught her as she fell back, "Easy now Kimber!" he tried to soothe her, "Legolas is fine. He ah…, he um…, just had to go and check on something for Haldir. He will be back soon!" Frodo lied trying to reassure her that everything was okay. It was no surprise to him that she had asked for the elf as he had seen the two developing what he deemed to be more than "friendly" relationship; as it were. He caught a glimpse of them now and again as they walked along the well-trodden paths of the forests together. One would have to be blind to not notice all of the winking, smiling and smirking going on between the two of them. Now having thought of that, he also wondered why Rumil thought it appropriate to ask for Kimber's hand. He looked at her with his big blue eyes and she offered him a smile; one that relayed that she was comfortable and safe so long as he sat there with her. He hated lying to her but if she found out that Legolas had left in such a way, she would be despondent. Surely she would feel it necessary to go after him no matter how exhausted she was.

"Now, Kimber I want you to close your eyes and take it easy for a bit," Frodo insisted as he smoothed Kimber's hair with his delicate hands.

"But I…" Kimber tried to object as she sat up once more.

"But nothing Kimber! Frodo is right and you will listen to him!" Felicity commanded.

Letting out a sigh of defeat, Kimber closed her eyes and tried to relax, as she knew that she was in no frame of mind to argue with her sister.

Frodo looked to Felicity with concern.

"Do not feel bad about what you did Frodo. I would have done the same," she whispered hoping to ease his conscience. "Please tend to her while I go and find Legolas; this mess needs to be straightened out."

Frodo nodded in agreement and looked upon Felicity as she stood up, Rumil approached her now as she headed into the wood.

"She asked for Legolas. Is he the one that you made mention of? Is he the one that holds her heart?" his eyes glazed with the hint of tears.

Felicity sighed before answering him, "Yes Rumil, it is Legolas," she whispered. She felt awful, but whether it was she or Kimber that told him, the effect would be the same. She started to walk away from him when he lightly grabbed on to her forearm, "Tell me Felicity, does he return her feelings?"

"Yes Rumil, he does. That is why I must go and speak to him," she offered.

Orophin seeing his brother's lament stood next to Rumil and put a comforting arm around him. Rumil bowed his head down slightly when Orophin gave Felicity a look of assurance as if to say that he would take it from there. She nodded at him and watched as the two turned and walked away.

She sighed and began to head in the direction that she saw Legolas go when both Aragorn and Gimli approached her.

"Felicity, please do not take this in the wrong way but I feel that it would be best if Gimli and myself spoke to Legolas first." Aragorn suggested. Gimli stood beside him nodding his head in agreement.

Felicity glanced back and forth between the two for a moment before speaking, "Aragorn, Gimli; I suppose you are right, though please promise me that you will do right by my sister and make sure that Legolas knows that this was all simply a big misunderstanding. He must know that my sister loves him and him alone" Felicity insisted.

"So it shall be, my lady," Aragorn replied, bowing slightly to her before he and Gimli headed off into the wood.

She smiled as she watched them disappear into the dark night knowing that she could trust Aragorn and Gimli to bring Legolas back to her sister. But no sooner did she turn to leave when she noticed Boromir quickly sneaking off after them.

*********

"Oh Frodo! I cannot believe that this is happening to me!" Kimber sighed, placing her hand on her forehead.

Frodo smiled lightly at her as he she laid there resting. "Kimber do not worry about such things now, just relax." Frodo looked on to see that his three friends still remained watching as he comforted Kimber.

"Ah, Frodo, is there anything we can do?" Merry spoke finally; unsure of what reaction he would receive after the `water' incident.

Frodo nodded his head, "Actually Merry, if you wouldn't mind getting Kimber and I some blankets to dry off with?"

"You got it Frodo!" Merry now beamed as he grabbed Pippin and went off in search of the requested articles.

Frodo laughed quietly at the two. They could be so trying at times, but all in all their hearts were pure gold and you could always count on one of them to make things `interesting' when times were tough.

"What is so funny Frodo?" Kimber inquired now looking up at him.

"Ah, Miss Kimber! I think Mister Frodo was just reminiscing, that is all!" said Sam now kneeling next to Frodo, "Right Mister Frodo?"

"Yes Sam, I was!" Frodo began to think back to when both he and Sam had first started out on this quest and they had run into Merry and Pippin, who were at the time being chased by Farmer Maggot for stealing from his crop. From that moment on the two remained with them; he thought of their journey to the Prancing Pony and their discovery of `pints' as they had hoped to meet up with Gandalf in Bree.

`Gandalf' Frodo thought, remembering his dear friend as he looked down to see the ring that hung around his neck. Were it not for that ring then Gandalf would still be alive today and he and his friends would be safely tucked away back in the confounds of the Shire! Everyday, he felt its burden growing heavier.

His expression saddened as he now gazed into the camp's fire. He knew what he had to do. The long a road ahead seemed long and dark but he was the one who volunteered to take the ring to Mordor and cast into the fiery depths of Mt. Doom; and it was his burden alone.

"Mister Frodo? Are you okay?" Sam was growing a might concerned as he looked upon his friend.

"Yes Sam, I am fine." Frodo replied snapping out of his trance and forcing a smile, "I was just thinking about Gandalf."

"Oh Mister Frodo, please don't go blaming yourself again!" Sam implored.

Merry and Pippin returned with the blankets and handed them to Frodo and Kimber. She sat up and wrapped the blanket around her as Merry and Pippin now sat down to join the conversation.

"Frodo this may not be the right time to ask but who is Gandalf?" Kimber asked cautiously.

Frodo offered her a soft smile "It is alright Kimber" he placed his hand on hers, "Gandalf was a great wizard and a good friend. We lost him in the Mines of Moria just before we ventured into your forest."

"Oh Frodo I am so sorry!" Kimber's eyes saddened as she looked at all four hobbits around her. She could tell that their hurt was still deep.

"No need for apologies Miss Kimber!" Sam sighed.

"Sam is right Kimber there is no need to be sorry. I was actually thinking about how delighted he would have been to have met you and Felicity." Frodo squeezed Kimber's hand lightly.

"Could you see Gandalf trying to reason with Felicity! Now that would be a sight!" Merry snickered.

"We would look like saints compared to her, Mer!" Pippin added.

Kimber gazed at them now and thought how lucky she was to have met such kind and caring friends. "I want to thank you for taking care of me."

"We would do anything for you Kimber!" Frodo offered generously as the others nodded in agreement.

*********

"It is of no use, I don't see him anywhere," Gimli sighed.

"I am sure that I saw him run in his direction," Aragorn looked around, "I hope nothing has happened to him."

"Nothing has happened to me, I am here," the two looked up to see Legolas perched on a tree branch leaning against the trunk of a tree.

"There you are, my little pointy-eared friend," Gimli chuckled, "By what means do leave us with such haste?"

"Post haste, for he finally saw what I have seen for days," all eyes turned to Boromir who now joined the group.

"Oh Great," Gimli huffed.

"Boromir," Aragorn began.

"Let me speak, Aragorn, too long have you been blind to their debauchery. The way in which they use their sexual prowess to deceive us, to deter our progress, you have turned your eye from it. You loathe my actions as I have laid wait in the shadows but I have seen much, and I tell you I have seen this moment coming for days," Boromir eyes were wild now as he spoke, "she is nothing but a filthy whore, giving herself to whomever will benefit her the most; think about it `Prince' of Mirkwood . Legolas turned his head away from Boromir now in humiliation.

"That is enough," Aragorn insisted as he now muscled Boromir away from the group.

"Can you not see that he is already grieved, must you add insult to injury," Aragorn sighed.

"Sometimes the truth hurts, at least I am honest with him," Boromir puffed out his chest.

"You're judgment is so suppressed I wonder if you can even distinguish truth from fabrication," Aragorn was growing angrier by the moment as he drew close to Boromir.

"It has now become evident in my eyes why you have never taken your post as king," Boromir seethed.

"Enlighten me," he challenged.

"How can you be loyal to a country when you can not even be loyal to a friend?" Boromir replied.

"Alright, that is enough," Gimli approached the two, "Boromir for the benefit of all, you should be on your way, Aragorn I will stay with Legolas, you go for a walk," he added.

"I will stay Gimli," his expression softened.

"Aragorn, I am afraid that your presence now would do more harm then good, I promise I will do right by the elf, now go," he insisted. Aragorn obliged, walking in the opposite direction that Boromir headed in.

"Seems as though our journey through this forest has been nothing but… perilous," Legolas sighed. Gimli was glad to see that he had now come down from the tree and was standing with his back to the dwarf.

"Oh, Legolas, you don't mean that, for certainly you have benefited from our journey," Gimli smiled.

"Have I Gimli, for look where I stand now, alone and looking the fool." He replied wearily, "I offered her my love and she had already given hers to an elf."

"Well, you are half right," he replied matter-of-factly.

"And what do you mean by that?" Legolas insisted.

"Well you are correct in saying that she has given her heart to an elf," Gimli gave him a serious look and then smiled at him, "My little pointy eared friend-that elf is you!"

Legolas looked at him queerly, "Gimli why do you talk such nonsense, I was there I saw the whole thing," he sighed.

"Did you? Or did you go running away as soon as you heard something you didn't like, like a pompous prince!"

"Gimli!" Legolas gasped.

"That's master dwarf to you, lop-ears," he was now smiling, "And now if you like to join me, I will tell you what you missed as we head back to camp."

*********

Armed with the prospect of eating humble pie, Kimber decided that it was time she had the "talk" with Rumil. Having now wished she had done so sooner, she excused herself from the hobbits and slowly stood up, with a little help from Frodo, to go find him.

"Where would ya be goin' Miss Kimber?" Sam asked curiously.

"I have to go and straighten this mess out." she replied half-heartedly.

"Are you sure you are up to it, Kimber?" Frodo's facial expression was full of concern. .

"Yes, I am sure, " She smiled as Frodo sat back down with the others.

"Why do you wanna go running after that elf for anyways?" Merry half-scolded, not really liking the idea of her going off by herself and being alone with Rumil.

"Kimber, you should stay with us. You know, the ones who look after you, the ones who didn't run away!" Pippin added agreeing with Merry,

"Really," Merry huffed. "When they say elves are light on their feet, they ain't liying! Pip, did you see the way Legolas took off!" he continued.

Frodo cringed hearing Merry's last words.

"Frodo I thought you said that Legolas was helping Haldir?" Kimber looked to him now.

Sam reached out and smacked Merry in his head. "What! What did I say?" Merry whined as he rubbed where Sam had hit him.

"Frodo?" Kimber asked once more waiting for his reply.

"Kimber, I am sorry," he shook his head.

Kimber stood silent for a moment she would have never imagined Frodo lying to her.

"Kimber please believe that I did not mean to lie to you. I just thought it was the best thing to do. You were in no shape to hear otherwise," he replied eyes full of remorse.

Her anger faded as she saw the look he now bore on his face. She knew then that he had only her best interest in mind.

"Frodo…" she knelt down next to him and pulled him into a light embrace, "I believe you and I forgive you." she squeezed him lightly, "Thank you for caring about me."

She stood up and paused for a moment readying herself, "Now…can anyone tell me which way Rumil went?"

**********

"Fools!" Boromir mumbled to himself as he wandered through the forest, the thought of Aragorn insinuating that he could not tell the difference between truth and lies seethed him to no end. He kicked a rock, turned and cursed in the direction where he left Legolas and Gimli. He then turned to continue on his journey when something caught him at the neck. He stepped back and held his throat. Shielding his eyes from the sun he looked up to see if he had walked into a branch or something, he had not; it was Felicity's foot that had clipped him.

"How dare you disrespect my sister you… piece of filth!" he looked up at her in surprise, he could never have imagined such an encounter.

"Felicity?!" he stepped back a bit to get a better look at her, "What do you mean by kicking me?"

"Oh, I mean much more than that, Boromir," she smirked.

He now understood her intentions as she hopped down without much effort from the tree branch.

"You are more of a fool than I thought you to be, Felicity," he peered at her and reached for his sheath; to his dismay he was not armed.

"Am I?" she sneered as for a moment his eyes were filled with panic at his lack of weaponry.

"Do not test me, witch, I am much stronger than you are," he lunged at her; to his surprise she did not flinch.

"I have waited for this moment since the first time I set my eyes upon you, you coward," she taunted as she now moved around him; he followed suit so as not to allow her an advantage.

"As have I, enchantress, too long have you and your sister been allowed to cloud our minds with your devilry, it is time that your evil ways were stopped." He declared.

"Bring it on, Boromir," she challenged him as he lunged at her once more; she was quick on her feet as she ducked him.

"Oh, I see your only defense is too run away," he laughed at her, to which she responded with a swift right hook to the eye.

"It would be a cold day in the underworld before I ran from a man," she huffed. He quickly stood up and jabbed her in the mouth with his fist; splitting her lip. She stopped for a moment; astounded. He looked on with surprise then paused for a moment before proceeding to walk over to where she was standing holding her mouth to see if she were okay.

As he did she quickly reached up, grabbed the very branch she had been sitting only moments before; swung her legs forward and kicked him in the forehead, sending him to his knees clutching his head.

"You Bitch!?" he screamed as he reached up grabbing her by the legs and pulled her from the branch. Boromir climbed over to her now, straddled himself atop her and brought a hearty open-handed slap to her cheek, "You wanna play rough, we'll play rough," he huffed.

"So we shall," she replied before bringing a knee to his groin, he collapsed to the ground wrenching in pain for a moment. Felicity quickly stood to her feet and kicked him in the ribcage.

"Ugh, you wait, you filthy whore," he gasped one hand on his privates the other on his side.

"Whenever your ready," she dusted her hands off, satisfied with herself as she turned to walk away.

"How about now?" she turned to see him coming straight for her, eyes ablaze, he tackled her to the ground and pulled her hair, "Owww" she wailed before sinking her teeth into his arm, "Ahhh," he screamed as blood poured from the wound.

"What goes on here?" Aragorn ran over to the two of them followed by Gimli and Legolas. Whereas it took only Aragorn to subdue Boromir, it took both Gimli and Legolas to keep Felicity at bay.

********

It was not long after she left the camp that Kimber came across Rumil and also Orophin. She watched for a moment as Orophin consoled his brother. Rumil was definitely heartbroken. She felt horrible for the pain she was causing him though she still could not understand why he thought that she loved him?

She waited a few more moments before finally getting the courage to go to him.

"Rumil?" she timidly called out.

Rumil and Orophin both looked up to see Kimber now standing only a few feet away from them.

"May I speak to you?" she asked.

Orophin looked back to his brother, who shook his head in agreement, "I will be okay Orophin, this is something that Kimber and I must resolve." He smiled lightly at his brother and patted his knee before standing and making his way over to where she stood.

They watched as Orophin left them alone and remained silent, one waiting for the other to start.

"Rumil I am truly sorry" Kimber broke the stillness between the two.

"Kimber I do not understand how this could be," Rumil paused as the pain he was feeling flashed in his eyes, "You told me the other night that you wanted to be with me and now I find out that your heart belongs to another?"

`The other night? What is he talking about?' Kimber thought to herself, `I do not remember ever telling him I wanted to be with him.'

"Rumil, what are you talking about? Exactly when did I tell you this?" Kimber now asked confused.

Rumil's face hardened as he listened to her question, "You do not even remember the moment when you accepted my proposal? Surely you are not the fickle!" his tone was raised now.

Kimber shook her head. She truly had no idea what he was talking about.

"It was the first night you returned to the forest, we were eating dinner together, you and I were sitting on the log." He offered.

Kimber thought for a moment. Yes, she remembered sitting on the log with him and talking about Samwise's soup, certainly that wasn't a proposal. She slowly played back the events of that evening in her mind. She remembered almost shooting Haldir, scolding Felicity for getting her in trouble, Felicity pushing her off the log, Rumil helping her up and asking her to join him.

She was puzzled. So far she could not recall anything of what Rumil claimed she had supposedly said to him-except for the soup. Though now that she though a bit harder he was doing an awful lot of talking but her attention was focused elsewhere.

"OH NO!" she said out loud, feeling worse than ever.

"Oh no?" Rumil now looked as confused as she did just moments before.

"I think there has been a misunderstanding." Kimber admitted, cursing to herself for how foolish she was.

"I don't understand," Rumil now had a dazed look on his face.

Kimber thought for a moment before answering. How was she going to tell him? "Rumil, I do remember that night but when you were talking to me my mind was elsewhere and I...I…did not actually hear anything that you said to me."

His facial expression went from confused to irritated.

"A misunderstanding?" he hissed. "It that what you would call it? Was it a misunderstanding when we were together?"

"Rumil I really am truly sorry. I never wanted to hurt you!" Kimber pleaded hoping for forgiveness, though if he didn't forgive her, she could not blame him.

"Kimber, do not misunderstand me when I tell you that you did hurt me," he replied curtly.

"I understand, and again, I am sorry for you having to go through this!" Kimber now felt a few tears escape from her eyes, "I hope we still can be friends," she added before turning away from him.

"That is rich Kimber, I don't know what to say to you, I should have heeded my brothers warning when I set my eye upon you once more. `Remember their last visit to our home, nothing good comes from them, best be on your guard', he said to me."

"Rumil!" Kimber may have been delicate but she was no force to reckon with nonetheless, "Never have I deceived you. You saw only what you wished to see," she replied sharply now.

"The fact still remains that you accepted my proposal, Kimber, is there no excuse for that?" he replied.

"When we were `together' did I not say to you that I was waiting to share my heart with someone I loved?" she turned the tables on him.

"You did," he replied.

"Ever did you think it odd that I would accept a proposal from you after not seeing you for 5 years," she raised a brow.

"What?" he hadn't thought of it in that way, his brow now softened, he had been irrational.

"I apologize Kimber, I have been the fool, I should have seen that the love you have is not for me," he now remembered the night in question, all the while he was speaking to her she had been watching Legolas.

"Rumil, I do have love in my heart for you, as a friend," she approached him now and stroked his cheek with her hand.

"Though I do not wish to bear that title, Kimber, I will accept it, for I could not fathom a life without you in it, even as such," he smiled now before taking her hand from his face and kissing it gently.

It was at that moment when a strange sound echoed through the dark forest.

"What was that?" Rumil turned his head quickly, "I have never heard an animal of this wood make such a sound!"

Kimber's eyes grew wide with fright, "That was no animal Rumil, that was Felicity!"