Fan Fiction ❯ Embracing the Darkness ❯ Chapter 3 - Ramifications ( Chapter 3 )

Author's Note - Here's the third chapter, hope you like it. One slight change I've made is that the scene depicted in the prologue is now two weeks after Raven's change, not six months as originally planned. As far as pairings go I haven't really reached that point in the planning of the story. Hope that helps somewhat. Enjoy!

 

Disclaimer - I have never and will never own Teen Titans

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 3 - Ramifications

 

After I'd regained my composure after my initial realization of my change, I began to do whatever I could to hide it. In my euphoric state after I emptied the IV bag I unconsciously spilled a good amount of blood on the floor of the supply closet and proceeded to track it from there out into the infirmary. Using what basically were a brown paper towel and a little water, I hurriedly cleaned up the bloody footprints I had left. I worked at the sink to wash the red tint of blood from my teeth in addition to the portion that formed a grotesque red ring around my mouth.

 

There was certain urgency to my work that, no doubt, arose from the fact that I wanted to get upstairs before Starfire rallied the others into a crusade in my name. The sorrow she'd apparently felt before had now dissolved into a palpable self-righteous indignation. In truth, it scared me a little to hear her talking like that. As I knew her, Starfire had always been amazingly kind and cheerful, annoyingly so at times. The manner in which she now spoke seemed just….un-Starfire.

 

As Starfire continued to rage above I now pondered how I would hide the most obvious signs of my vampirism: my fangs and my red eyes. Although I wore a hood over my face on a regular basis, I couldn't very well hide my eyes behind it and function properly. I decided that I would simply have to go as is as far as my eyes were concerned. I could find a reasonable explanation when the time came. My fangs, however, were a totally different story. There was no rational explanation I could give for their presence.

 

They appeared to have once been my cuspids only now some unknown force had sharpened as well as lengthened them while I was unconscious. The same had happened to the cuspids on my bottom row of teeth although it was less significant. The two pairs of fangs fit nicely together whenever I closed my mouth, the upper pair coming down over the lower. Despite that my teeth had been completely rearranged to accommodate this change, it didn't feel the slightest bit unnatural.

 

If I were to merely show my teeth it would take a close inspection to notice the fangs given how well they blended in with my other teeth, and I doubted that anyone would ever get that close to me, let alone to just examine my teeth. The problem occurred if I talked. The outlines of both the newly formed rows of teeth would be clearly visible even from a distance. The fact that I'd been living here for years now only made it all the easier to notice the difference. And here was my dilemma; I had to find some way to at least make the upper pair less prominent. But how?

 

For a moment the thought occurred to me that maybe I should just find a pair of pliers, pull them out and be done with it. However, that would be more trouble than it was worth. But what else could I do? “If thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out.” I could simply tell the others that I'd lost some teeth in the fight I'd had. What reason would they have to doubt that?

 

Searching through the surgical equipment of the infirmary I managed to find an instrument that would serve my needs. It was metal, shiny, and looked rather unpleasant especially given what I would use it for. After hunting down some gauze to take care of the bleeding, I was ready but not necessarily willing. I was still trying to find another solution as I made my way back to the mirror in the bathroom, stalling my actions as much as I could. Barnabas had to have some means of hiding who he was. He couldn't have functioned in the world with such an obvious indication of his true nature. I considered everything from painting the fangs black to casting a spell on the others so they wouldn't see. None of these were feasible given my current situation and what items I had access to. I had to do something and at least this solution allowed me a reasonable explanation.

 

I held my self over the sink with the water running as I placed my mound of gauze down and gently gripped my right fang with the instrument. If my lungs drew breath I would have been hyperventilating at this point. I watched myself in the mirror with wild fear-filled eyes. As I tightened the pliers around the large tooth and began to pull, every muscle in my body tensed up. I couldn't feel any pain yet, but there was a strong unpleasant pulling sensation. As I applied more force to the action the feeling grew stronger. I began to whimper in fear despite myself. At the last minute I released the fang from the pliers grip and slammed the instrument down beside the sink with a loud clattering sound.

 

I was gripped by the fear of pain, the fear of self-mutilation. But could I really consider these hideous teeth to be parts of myself? No, they were not. These fangs protruding from my upper jaw represented nothing more than a perversion of my true self. If I was to advance from this moment and find a cure for this vampirism they had to go. Part of the problem seemed to be that I hadn't taken the time to meditate since the night before. My emotions kept getting in the way of my actions; I needed control if I was to move forward. I had to hold onto the hope that Starfire would be as verbose as she could possibly be from now till I was finished.

 

With a sense of urgency, I sat cross-legged on the tile floor of the bathroom. Gaining some sense of composure I began to chant my mantra, slowly and deliberately as I relaxed every muscle in my being. “Azarath, metrion, zinthos,” I chanted feeling myself levitate off of the floor letting go of all earthly concerns. “Azarath, metrion, zinthos,” I chanted feeling the calming effects of my meditation washing over me. “Azarath, metrion, zinthos,” I chanted as I felt a sudden strange friction or vibration within the confines of my mouth, as though my teeth were grinding together.

 

Bringing myself back to earth I again stood before the mirror, still not ready to perform my tooth extraction but now more curious about what I'd just felt. As though my wish to find another solution had been answered, I now found both fangs in my upper jaw had been drawn back into my jaw and appeared no different from my other teeth, despite the fact that they were still as sharp as they were before. Retractable fangs. At this point, part of me actually wished that Barnabas, my malefactor, hadn't left me laying there for my friends to find. I would have liked it if I didn't have to discover all of this by myself, it would have been significantly less of a physical and mental strain. Now, though, I would endure without his help.

 

 

My shoes made dull thuds that reverberated through the stairwell as I climbed step by step. I decided to take the short walk up the stairs from the infirmary rather than take the elevator. It would be less noticeable than simply stepping out of the elevator and it would also give me a moment to organize myself before I “ran the gauntlet,” so to speak. I felt open and vulnerable wearing only my black leotard and part of me wished that I'd had gumption to bring my cloak along despite the bloodstains. It was too late now, though.

 

The main stairwell as well as the elevator ran the full height of the tower starting at the lobby on the ground floor and going all the way up to the heliport on the roof. The tower was intentionally designed, as a security measure, so that the most important areas were on the upper floors while the areas of least importance were on the lower levels. For instance, the gymnasium was located in the shaft of the T while the evidence room was located in the east wing of the upper floors. The living quarters, infirmary, and common room were located in the upper wings as well.

 

I now stood before the door leading to the common room; beyond I could clearly hear Starfire still in the middle of her self-righteous tirade while Robin tried vainly to calm her down. I took a calming breath and opened the sliding doors. I was thankful to find the nighttime scenery of Jump City greeting me from beyond the large windows rather than blinding sunlight. The common room was the single largest room in the building, almost taking up two full stories with its elevated ceiling. To the immediate right of the entrance was a small kitchen area with the essentials: a stove, refrigerator, cabinets of china and silverware. It wasn't anything elaborate but it was serviceable.

 

To the left was a small sitting area used primarily for meals. Again, it wasn't anything extraordinary. It was only a simple arrangement of seats around a single yellow table capable of seating all five of us. It had once sat six, but those days are long gone. A large red carpet shaped like a T ran the full length of the room, branching off when it reached the entertainment area. A large curved couch faced an even larger plasma screen television mounted directly in front of the two canopy windows. Ladies and gentleman, behold your tax dollars at work.

 

Between the television and the couch was a small, circular coffee table upon which Starfire now stood regaling her captive audience with a speech about how wonderful I was and why I should be avenged with haste. Robin, Beast Boy, and Cyborg would have probably gone their separate ways by now if they hadn't feared the unusual amount of anger the alien girl was displaying. The only other time I'd even seen her acting in a similar manner had been during the celebratory banquet that was held on her home world upon our arrival, providing you could call that predatory display a “banquet.”

 

There she stood, her eyes ablaze with an inner green light, her fists clenched. As she spoke she made wild gestures with her hands that gave one the impression that she was striking at unseen foes that had dared to threaten me. It was very heartening to see that my death would elicit this type of response and it brought the faint glimmer of a smile to my lips. Starfire continued her speech as if it was long rehearsed, her gestures didn't even seem to be directed at the three mourners that made up her audience but were directed all over the room. It was the randomness of these gestures that finally brought her gaze upon me. Her speech came to a sudden halt as all her movements ceased and her eyes returned to normal. For the longest time she simply stared at me with an indecipherable look upon her face. I suppose the best way to describe it would be as a look of placid shock. The expression she bore was neither overly shocked nor overly relaxed, merely somewhere in between.

 

“Ra…Raven?” Starfire spoke at last with a slight stutter.

 

“Showtime,” I thought to myself. “Guys, its not that I don't appreciate all this, because I really do. Its nice to know that I'd be missed if, heaven forbid, something ever happened to me. But, I'd say it's a bit premature at this point,” once I'd spoken the other three turned towards me with similar looks upon their faces, placid shock. They'd apparently been so certain of my death any joy was quickly overridden by the shock of seeing me up and about. “Well, if you'd like I could head back down to the infi…,” I didn't even have time to finish my witticism as Starfire rocketed across the room from her perch upon the coffee table, arms spread, and knocked me to the floor with the force of her embrace.

 

“Oh, Raven!” she squealed with joy as she dragged me to my feet, “you are alive and well. We thought we'd lost you forever most precious friend. It is a miracle, a wonderful, wonderful miracle. Friend Raven, you've come back to us.” It was here that I came to realize just how great the change I'd undergone was. Starfire's hugs were generally…suffocating, so to speak, and were known to occasionally leave bruises. Yet, here I felt none of that. No shortness of breath (which I expected) and no pain due to the force of the embrace.

 

But also, I now noticed how cool my body had become, to a point that Starfire seemed to shiver slightly as she tightened her embrace. She seemed so warm, and I felt so cold by comparison. I hadn't even noticed it before. I could even feel the warmth of her tears soaking in to the fabric of my uniform. As undeniably pleasant as Starfire's warm hug felt, I wanted this to be over and done with soon so I could decide my next move. “Thanks Starfire,” I mimicked the sound of a person being choked, “but I'd like to breathe if you don't mind,” I lied.

 

“Oh,” she withdrew her arms from around me, “I sincerely apologize for harming you friend, it was not my intention. But I am simply overjoyed beyond reason to see you. We all were overcome by a most terrible grief for you, Raven.” By now the initial shock the others had experienced had worn off and they'd come to join Starfire in celebrating my resurrection.

 

“Ha haaa,” Cyborg chuckled pleasantly, “Christ Raven, you really gave us a scare. I mean, we all really thought you were dead. Hell, I called the coroner and everything. How'd you make it? Are you feeling all right? Who attacked you anyway?”

 

“I was merely in a meditative trance which allowed me to heal from my wounds. Apparently I was so seriously injured that it put me into a death-like state. Sorry if I worried you but I'm perfectly fine. As for my attacker, I'm afraid I didn't' get a good enough look at him to tell you much,” I would like to thank the Academy.

 

“Well, I'm glad to hear you're alright in any event” Robin finally spoke up. Robin was the type of person who made a point of distancing himself emotionally from a situation. This was a condition he maintained most of the time, except when it came to Slade of course. Slade seemed to strike Robin in just the right manner, igniting his passions to a point where they transcended all notions of good and evil. “Though, are you sure you really are ok Raven. You don't look very well, you seem…paler than usual,” he continued.

 

“Relax, it's just a side effect of the meditation I used to save myself. I swore to only use it for the most serious situation because the trance it would put me in had some abnormal side effects. Like my new eye color?” I said gesturing towards my newly red eyes, “I'm hoping its temporary.”

 

“It's an interesting look, I'll admit. But, Raven, are you sure that there isn't anything we can do to help. We are your friends, after all.”

 

“Robin, there's nothing I need help with. All I need is a good night's rest. That's all.”

 

“Same old Raven, you won't accept any help at all, will you.”

 

“Not unless its absolutely necessary,” I droned. “Now, what about you Beast Boy? Do you have anything to say to me?” the green skinned changeling had been just as shocked as the others to see me but hadn't taken the initiative to speak yet. He hung back from me, as though he were trying to decide what to say, and having great difficulty in finding the proper words.

 

“Its alright Beast Boy,” I assured him, “I don't blame you for anything. It was my decision to leave the tower last night. Any part you played in that decision was minimal at best. You have nothing to feel guilty over so you can relax. So…how was the movie last night? Any good?”

 

Beast Boy seemed to brighten up almost upon the moment the words left my lips. “Well, aside from the cheesy dialogue, simple plot, and the occasionally bits of nudity, yeah it was pretty good. I think you'd like it,” he repeated my words from the night before as he walked towards me. “It isn't due back till tomorrow if you want to…”

 

“Thanks for the offer but I'd better not.”

 

“Aw, come on Raven. All you have to do is admit when your scared and we'll be fine.”

 

“Cute Beast Boy but that's not the problem. I'm just a little exhausted after this whole experience and want to get to bed early so if you don't mind…”

 

“No, not at all, maybe some other time then.”

 

I didn't exactly know why I felt the need to act so nicely towards Beast Boy. In truth I'd still rather have gone for another late night walk instead of watching that movie of his. Even though on some level I felt he was right in feeling some responsibility for what happened, I suppose I just didn't want him to have to bear that kind of burden. I can be understanding when I want to.

 

After I took the time to bid the others goodnight I turned to leave for my room. Before I could reach the door out into the hall, Starfire flew up behind me and stopped me.

 

“Raven, are you really leaving us so soon. I was going to prepare a traditional Tamaranian feast to celebrate your miraculous recovery. Will you not stay and enjoy it with us? This is an event that needs to be commemorated in some form,” she implored me.

 

As much as I respected Starfire's distinctive personality and culture, her taste in food was suspect at best. “Thanks Star, but I'm really not that hungry right now. Maybe some other time.”

 

“Oh, but Raven…” she now gave me the most sympathetic stare that she could possibly have summoned. She looked as though she would break down and cry if I didn't at least make some concession.

 

I sighed, “All right, save some of it for me in the fridge and I'll have it for breakfast, how's that,” I conceded.

 

“Oh thank you Raven, I promise you that it will be the most wonderful breaking of the fast that you have ever ingested. And do not worry, the boys and I will be sure to leave you a sampling of every dish I prepare.”

 

I forced myself not to grimace as the thought, “Thanks Star, I'll look forward to it. Good night.”

 

“Yes friend Raven, good night. May you have many pleasant dreams, friend. I will see you for the breaking of the fast.” And with that I left headed for my own room. I didn't need to look back to picture the looks of feigned joy upon the boy's faces. Before they had been Starfire's captive audience during her self-righteous rant, now they were faced with a situation that was arguably far more unpleasant. I was never gladder to be an invalid in their eyes, however misplaced that belief may have been.

 

 

 

When I finally returned to my own room, locking the door behind me, I half expected to find it changed on some way. Although only a day had passed since I'd last been here, the wide range of events that had occurred recently made it seem as though more time had passed. My book still rested upon my bed where I had abandoned it the night before, an empty teacup sat idly upon my nightstand. It seemed as though I had never left the room at all.

 

I didn't even bother to turn the lights on, as I no longer needed them. As I fell backwards onto my bed, I couldn't help but wonder how I would function during the day from now on. Even if I could find a cure I would still have to live like this for some time, at least. Worse, I knew nothing of what I was to experience in the coming days. I already found that the truth about vampires was slightly different from what I had read in books and seen on television. The sunlight should have engulfed me in flame; instead it only blinded me, however powerful the effect was. I wondered what else had the world been wrong about?

 

One thing I was certain of was my newfound blood thirst. The irrefutable fact was that I would need to consume some amount of fresh blood on a daily basis to stay my hunger. No other food was capable of sustaining me. I readily recalled the stock of IV bags I had sampled once I had awoken in the infirmary, but that blood was reserved for another purpose entirely. I could easily imagine the darkly humorous scene. Someone, perhaps Robin, would be terribly injured in a fight to the point that he would require a transfusion to survive. “Sorry Robin,” I'd say, “there isn't enough blood to save you. I'm afraid I drank it all. It was good though, if that's any consolation.” An extreme example, I know, but not entirely outside of the realm of possibility. That blood was meant for medical emergencies, but what other choice did I have as this point?

 

So I waited. I waited for the others to finish eating. I waited for them to finish watching television and playing their video games. I waited until I had heard the tell tale sounds of each and everyone of my friends venturing off to the land of nod, and then waited a few minutes more to be sure that my actions tonight would remain secret.

 

Once I was absolutely certain that all was still, I left my room, gliding along the hallways towards the common room first then the infirmary. I emptied out an entire 8 oz. bottle of Coke I'd found left in the refrigerator and scoured the cupboards for the smallest glass I could find. My plan was simple. I would take what blood I could from the infirmary, but only as much as I felt I could, not as much as I was capable of taking. The loathing I felt for what I had become meant that I would not satisfy this need totally.

 

In truth, I never once considered that this would last very long. I felt undeniably confident that I would find a cure in a matter of days, perhaps even the very next day if I looked in the right place. And so, confident that this was only a temporary situation, I closed the curtains, undressed, and crawled into bed.

 

As I expected, sleep never came for me that night. For all intents and purposes I had become something nocturnal. However, it wasn't simply that sleep wouldn't come for me; I found that I was now physically incapable of sleeping at night. I merely lay there, waiting for the morning to come and with it the prospect of a cure for this disease I had been afflicted with. I have come to realize, though, that things rarely turn out the way you expect them to.