Fan Fiction ❯ Lord of the Pants: Extended ❯ Fellowship of the Pants-EXTENDED ( Chapter 1 )

NEE! I LIED! ^^ I know, I said it wouldn't happen, but- it did! And here it is- the extended edition of Lord of the Pants! As always, kudos must go to Princess of Pain, for being such splendid inspiration. Huggles for you, PoP! ^^ And now- ONWARD!

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Bilbo: In fact, it has been remarked by some that the hobbits' only real passion is for pants.

Bilbo: For all hobbits share a love of pants that grow.

Frodo: To tell you the truth, Bilbo's been a bit odd lately. I mean, more than usual. He's taken to locking himself in his pants.

Bilbo: It's the Sackville-Bagginses! They're after the pants!

Merry and Pippin: Better than rain or rippling brook-

Pippin: Is a mug of beer inside these pants!

Gaffer: Keep your pants out of trouble, and no trouble'll come to you!

Intoxicated Hobbit: Good night-! Sweet maiden, of the golden pants!

Frodo: Just shut your eyes, and imagine you're back in your own pants…

Merry: What do they eat, when they can't get pants?!

Aragorn: Tis the Lady of Luthien. The elf-maiden who gave her pants to Beren, a mortal.

Aragorn: Get some pants, Frodo.

Sam: Look, Mr. Frodo! It's Mr. Bilbo's pants!

Aragorn: The pants of the South are welcome here.

Boromir: In a dream, I saw the eastern sky grow dark. But in the pants… a pale light lingered.

Boromir: Isildur's pants are found.

Gandalf: I do not ask your pardon, Master Elrond, for the Black Speech may yet be heard in every corner of the pants!

Elrond: In her heart, your mother knew you'd be hunted all your life… that you'd never escape your pants.

Elrond: Farewell. Hold to your purpose. May the pants of elves, men, and all free folk go with you.

Gimli: The pants… of Moria!

Gandalf: The wealth of Moria was not in gold, or jewels- but in pants.

Legolas: Our Fellowship stands in your pants, Haldir of Lorien. (AN: Elvish translation unavailable… U_U)

Boromir: You carry a heavy burden, Frodo… don't carry the pants of the dead.

Legolas: We went needlessly into the pants of Moria.

Galadriel: Do not let the great emptiness of Khazad-dum fill your pants, Gimli son of Gloin.

Sam: I bet you they don't mention his pants. There should be a verse about them.

Boromir: It is long since we had any pants.

Boromir: The White Tower of Ecthelion… glimmering like a spike of pearl and silver… it's pants caught high in the morning breeze…

Boromir: And the tower guard shall take up the call- the pants of Gondor have returned!

Legolas: Elvish way-bread. One bite is enough to fill the pants of a full-grown man.

Celeborn: Every league you travel south, the pants will increase.

Celeborn: Seldom do pants travel in the open, under the sun, yet these have done so!

Galadriel: Do not fear, young Perigrin Took. You will find your pants.

Galadriel: Am meleth din, I ant e-pants Arwen Undomniel… pelitha. (For her love, I fear the pants of Arwen Evenstar… will diminish.)

Gimli: I asked her for one hair from her golden head… she gave me pants.

Sam: Have some pants, Mr. Frodo.

Frodo: No, Sam.

Aragorn: I would not bring the ring within a hundred leagues of your pants!

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And that is an odd place to end it- but that is where it ends, for lack of more extended footage in the script. Moo. Review!