Fan Fiction ❯ So this is love ❯ When will I be Happy? ( Chapter 2 )

At our college we got out really early so mid terms came quickly after spring break and Chris and I saw each other at least once a day still I couldn't stop thinking about him. He was so irresistible, he was smart sweet and I just wanted to be with him.

The weekend before finals I went to his frat party and I decided to just cut all ties with him because it was just too painful for me to deal with anymore. He was the sober brother but I had a drink. I saw many of my friends that I had known from the frat and some of my floor mates from my dorm. We didn't really have alone time because he ha to monitor the party. He took his break and we went upstairs to one of the frat rooms and made out for the entirety of the break.

At Chris' next break I decided that I would finally confront him. I told him we needed to talk and he became nervous and fidgety. We went outside for some privacy.

-Chris…I just don't know if I can do this anymore. I want to be with you but I want to be your girlfriend. Whatever it is we are doing I just don't understand it.

-Dorina as you know, I have been hurt in the past and I just don't want to label anything now. Yes we are dating and we are basically in a relationship but I just can't give you what you want right now.

-Chris, you want a relationship and I do as well. Why the fuck can't we have what we want? Why do we have to both just be hurting? Why this stress and pain? Chris I just want to be with you what is wrong with that? I will stay like this if its what you want but I want you to know that my feelings have grown and will continue to grow whether we are officially bf and gf or not. We promised not to keep anything from each other so this is how I feel.

-Okay Dorina. Let's get back inside and we can talk more tomorrow.

-Alright.

We headed back inside and when the party died down at around 2 am he walked me home. I definitely cried myself to sleep that night.

The next day I was volunteering at my dorm's sponsored carnival. I worked arts and crafts and I happened to bump into Chris during my 2 hour break.

-Hi, Dorina.

-I called your phone Chris.

-I left it in my room. I was actually not going to see you today.

-Oh ok.

-Do you want to go for a walk?

-Sure.

We went out to the cathedral lawn and sat down on a bench. We were both extremely quiet until he spoke.

-Dorina, I think we should just be friends over the summer. I was talking to my friend Steve, well he knows you and said you are a wonderful girl and I am just hurting you. I can't give you what you want right now and I think we should stop being intimate.

-Well, Chris I have been thinking and I think we should stay the same. It would be a compromise and maybe it will hurt but I want be able to be with you even if you aren't my boyfriend. Okay?

-If that's what you want Dorina, I can agree with you.

So we were right back to where we had started. Great. In the next few days I talked to my best friends Joni and Leigha about him. Slowly but surely I realized that in the past three months I had fallen in love with him. I was afraid and decided not to tell him yet.

A couple of days later he slept over again and we slept in bed together but we decided not to have oral sex anymore. I just felt wrong and didn't want it without the relationship. The next day was he last night at school and he came over and watched Donnie Darko. I got to introduce him to my friends and I was happy for one night. The next morning after I turned in my final paper he called me and I met him in the lobby. His dad was parked outside and he was ready to go home for the summer. I walked him to his van and he introduced me to his dad. His dad left to sign him out for the last time and we shared our last few moments together. I kissed him and hugged him for a long time. His dad came back and I watched them leave me. I stood there for a moment, as I thought about the man who I loved, who was gone.

Oh and not sure if I told you that this is a true story…I have some more details to get down but I will update soon….please review!!!