Fan Fiction ❯ Spirit of the Dragon ❯ Looking to Spring ( Chapter 15 )

Chapter Fifteen

The winter days drifted by in a daze for Acanthus. It was the first season since the War that fighting ceased. A hovering cloud of impending doom lifted, and for once he could actually enjoy his life. So he used this time to get closer to Crowe.

His affection for her was blatantly obvious. Even King Cornelius, who hardly knew his son, had caught onto the infatuation. It became the center of castle gossip. Nobles would hush whenever he passed. Servants snapped their mouths shut and averted their eyes. Many of them were not bothered by Crowe, but they were bothered by a relationship between her and Acanthus. Letting a Gardrothian into the Drunesmerrian Court was surely an act of social suicide.

But Acanthus was blissfully unaware of their qualms. He was too wrapped up in his fantasies, walking through the halls in a daydream.

Acanthus was convinced he could win her over. So he visited her whenever there was a letup in his princely duties (recently this involved nothing more than cities' trivial reports of progress). Often this meant during her lessons with Oria. If the old woman noticed her old student returned more often, she was silent about it.

Crowe smiled whenever he came, and then went back to playing while he took his rightful place on the bench. Neither would speak. They just sat there beneath the snowflakes, basking in the pleasure of each other's company. Their moments in the garden were too precious to waste on words.

It became a routine for him. And on the rare occasion that a meeting did not let up in time to join her, his heart ached. Because their time together was his breath, and to be apart from her made him weak.

She became the essence of his cogitation. She was the center, and all other things branched from his fervor. If there ever came an instant where his mind strayed, he remembered her again with a rush of elation.

Whenever he was near her, he endured a swirl of chaotic thoughts. Many of them were carnal in nature, for his masculinity had him bridled. But when he was not thinking of erotic fancies, he was thinking of tender ones, and it became immeasurably strenuous on his ego to resist her. He had to though, because he dared not advance on her without knowing the magnitude of her feelings towards Ronori. And he was afraid to ask. He wanted to cling to this feeling of euphoria, not hear that she was in love with another.

Winter was already nearing a close by the time he thought of another excuse to spend time with her. The idea came to him on a brief mission into the City to speak with Lord Oxalis. He was meeting him there to discuss the reconstruction of Veridea. And so Acanthus rode out on his father's dappled gray, Moonstruck, and on his way he passed a pair of lovers in a sleigh.

"Excuse me, for a moment." Prince Acanthus stopped directly in front of them, so that their driver had to tug on the reigns. Two white ponies tossed up their heads indignantly.

"Prince Acanthus…" The woman recognized him first. "To what do we owe this honor?" It was customary for lessors to touch their knees to the ground, when addressed by the Green Circle. But he raised a hand, gesticulating that they avoid the hassle of leaving their nest to crouch in the snow. "I only have a question…" Moonstruck took a sidestep to nuzzle one of the ponies' noses. "It is about this sleigh. Is it a service?"

"Aye." The driver spoke up. He was seated up high in a front seat. "I'm Winward, Sir Prince. And I just bought this sleigh to make money when farming's impossible. If yer at all interested…" He trailed off as Acanthus tossed him a gold coin.

"Come to the Castle at nightfall, and there is more in it for you."

"A mistra?" Winward slipped the coin into his vest. "You are most generous, Sir!"

Acanthus moved out of their way, and watched for a moment as the open sleigh proceeded down the country road. Now came the question of how he would broach the subject to Crowe.

Luck was on his side, however. After a productive meeting with Oxalis, Moonstruck trotted merrily back to the castle, hooves kicking up tufts of snow. And they found Crowe almost immediately, looking restless in the dying light.

"Acanthus!" She greeted him in relief. "Thank goodness! I was going bored out of my mind!"

It was all too easy: "How about a sleigh ride into the City?"

"Are you kidding? Of course!" Crowe's mass was concealed in a heavy coat. It seemed lately that she was ashamed of her pregnancy.

But why? Moonstruck sidled over to her, and Crowe patted the gray muzzle absently. She looks lovelier each day.

"So when do we go?" Crowe asked him.

"As soon as our ride gets here." Acanthus dismounted, and led Moonstruck towards the stables. One of the servants ran out to take him on a lead rope.

Not long after, a little sleigh appeared along the moonlit road, led on by two prancing white ponies.

"Oh, it's perfect!" She ran passed him to the gate. "Hello, there!"

Acanthus motioned for the guards to let them out, and they barely had obliged him before Crowe dashed over the metal-plated boards.

"Whoa, there..." Winward pulled the sleigh to the halt, and the ponies whinnied. "Good evenin', lass. Well then this must be the Gardrothian that has charmed our nation's prince." Of course the gossip had reached the City.

Acanthus blushed deeply, but she was turned away and did not see it.

"I'm Winward," The driver went on, "and these little ladies are Singsong and Rosemary." He was nodding at the ponies.

"They're very pretty." Crowe said, petting each one in turn. "Well, should we go?" Before he could offer to help her, she was hoisting herself up into the back seat.

"Very well, then…" Acanthus followed and sat to her right. When they both were situated, the sleigh gave a jerk and was underway.

The road into the City was a winding stretch of glistening silver. It wound its way up and down, the only break between sparsely pined hillsides.

"Is this all part of Azalea?" Crowe wondered.

"Yes. Really this whole plot of land is considered `the City', but usually when we say it, we only refer to the civilized part."

"I see…" Crowe peered away from him, letting cold wind whip at her face.

"In the spring, this whole area is a meadow." Prince Acanthus told her. "I should take you back here, to see it."

"That would be nice." She looked up at the darkening sky. Stars began to twinkle down at them.

He was painfully aware that he had nothing more to say to her, and he feared that the rest of their evening would be dull. But when they reached the City, her mood lightened, and she was suddenly quite easy to talk to. Everything he said became witty to her, and her wonderful laughter rang in his ears.

They went to dinner, and then strolled through the city together. Many onlookers regarded the pair in surprise. Something told Prince Acanthus it wouldn't be long before the entire castle knew of this outing.

Shopkeepers lined the streets, even though it was after dusk. It was nearing the season of holidays, and they were looking to make a tidy profit.

Acanthus caught her eyeing a cashmere blanket. It was an exquisite piece, hand-crafted with the finest of quality. Before she could stop him, he purchased it.

The two of them threaded between the glinting lights, until at last they returned to the City Square, where Winward was waiting for them. He nodded in greeting, and this time Acanthus helped Crowe into the sleigh, because she was too tired to beat him there. He stepped up backwards, and pulled her after him. But when they sat, he wouldn't let go. Instead he tightened his grip, moving his hand into hers so that their fingers intertwined. She watched him, breathless in the blue moonlight. What are you doing? He couldn't bear it any longer. He had to know if there was a chance. Even if it meant risking his happiness.

"There is something I must ask you." He waited for the lurch of the vehicle, and for the city lights to fade away before he went on. His voice was low so that not even Winward could hear. "Are you still in love with him?"

Crowe's brow creased and she looked down at their hands. For a moment, no words came to her, and he watched in apprehension as her head swayed with the sleigh.

"Well?" His voice cracked.

"I don't know."

"How can you not know?" He was bordering on outrage. "I mean, really…

"It's complicated." She hissed, her icy eyes defiant. "In case you hadn't noticed, I'm carrying his child."

He dropped her hand abruptly and looked away from her. He knew it was a mistake to bring it up. Now their evening was spoiled.

She let out a huff of annoyance. "Oh come now, Acanthus. You can't take it personally."

"How can I not?" The outrage held a twinge of despair. "I have worn my heart on my sleeve around you. And yet you cast me aside-"

"When did I do that?" She demanded. "When, Acanthus?"

He shook his head. "I cannot say exactly, but it seems to me…" He gave up. "Oh, never mind. What is the use?"

"No Acanthus. You started this argument and now you're going to finish it. I want to know when."

"Well alright, then. At my party."

"I thought we discussed this." She said.

"Well no, not exactly. Why did you run from me, Crowe? Was it because you were angry?"

"Not at first." She admitted.

"Then why?"

"Because I…" Crowe bit her lip. "Because I was afraid."

"You were afraid."

"Yes. I was afraid."

"Of me?"

"Of you. Of the way you looked at me. When I sang that song, I was only singing. I didn't hear the words until after." Her voice was calm now; the defiance was gone. "That's why I ran. Because I couldn't stand for it to happen again."

"For what to happen again?" He felt he were on the brink of unveiling something critical.

"Have my heart broken."

His expression softened, and he moved closer to her. "I know a little of that, dear Crowe."

"Yes, I think Oria mentioned something."

"Did she? Yes, I suppose that would make sense. There was a time when she knew of my romantic conquests. So you heard of my beloved Lady Viena, and her running away with my closest friend?"

Crowe blinked. "I heard it a lot more vaguely than that. Acanthus, that's horrible."

"I thought so." They sat there, reveling in each other's words.

"I'm sorry." Crowe whispered at last. "I just can't get involved with anyone. Not until I have closure with Rono."

"Rono? Oh." He realized who she was talking about.

"I haven't even seen him since our fight. Joriah, what if I never see him again?" This had never truly occurred to her until that moment. She looked ill.

"Look at us." He told her. "We are nothing more than wounded wretches."

She gave him a weak smile. "I guess you're right."

He turned to her intently, and slowly an arm came to settle over her shoulders. She accepted the comfort of his hold and let her head fall to his chest. He could feel her body quivering in the cold; her quaking sighs. He wished more than anything to rid her of her sorrows. He longed to banish them far into the stars.

"Are you cold?" Acanthus inquired.

"A little." Crowe admitted.

"Here…" He reached for the blanket and pulled it around them, letting it enfold their chilled bodies. "Better?"

She nodded sleepily and closed her eyes. He watched her. He watched the way soft moonlight shone in her hair. The way her lips trembled with every breath. He wanted so much for her to love him. But he couldn't have that. At least not yet.