Fan Fiction ❯ Teen Titans: Arachnophobia ❯ Of Clapper and Slurpie ( Chapter 3 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Spider-Man is getting settled in as Titan. Slurpie madness with Carnage and Venom. The two bump into our most favorite blue magician. Will the craziness stop? Heck no!

Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy / Adventure / Action | Type: Crossover | Uploaded On: 03.16.2005 | Pages: 13 | Words: 12.0K | Visits: 297 | Status: Completed

Just imagine for a second that you've been taken from your home and then suddenly were forced to move fifty miles away in about uh… let's just say thirty minutes. That's bad right?

Sure it is!

Okay! Now let's just imagine you've been taken away from the current country you live in and are forced to move to another country in oh… let's just say fifteen minutes. That's really bad right?

Sure it is!

Alright let's do this now shall we? Let's imagine that you've been taken from the very plane of existence you have lived in for your whole entire life. And in a split second, tossed into a place that you're so unfamiliar with, your head feels like it's spinning like a merry go round just trying to make any sense of it all. That's really really really really bad right?

Duh! Sure it is! You'd be a completely lagged! You'd be completely gagged! You might even be completely zig-zagged! (Heavy breathing)

Well, if you would feel this way (And I know you would!), then all that should be said to you is this.

`Welcome to the Amazing Spider-Man's world.'

Yesire, this was exactly how our favorite wall crawler felt at this particular time, probably even worse. And who could fault him? Taking into account that the `really really really really bad' stuff always happened to him? He should be irate! It truly seemed like no matter how `good' he was, or what noble deeds he performed, or how many lives he saved, this kid always got the short end of the stick.

Always.

But little did this inter-dimensional traveling hero know that this whole `Larry' accident, just like the one he received with the spider bite, had the potential to be one of those rare blessings in disguise. And as the boy in red stared at the sight in front of him, he finally began to catch a glimpse of the potential.

“Whoa.” Spider-Man muttered. The Titans of course got an amused chuckle out of the Keanu Reeves like expression.

Robin nodded. “Gets that kind of reaction every time eh Cy?”

“I built most of it man, of course it's gonna get that reaction every time.” The half-droid bragged.

Spider-Man scratched his head. “So this is where you guys live?” He slowly lifted his head up staring at the sky scraping `T', feeling totally belittled. “Not bad.” He gulped.

“Yes friend, this is our home! I cannot wait to be able to share with you the gloriousness of our dwellings. We will have much fun! The excitement will rival our celebrations of Tamaran's annual Zorchnar festival!” Starfire replied joyously. This alien always loved having company as one could easily tell.

Spider-Man nodded blankly, disregarding the words `Tamaran' and `Zorchnar' of course, still mesmerized by the tower.

Titans Tower in all its magnificence and splendor like Cyborg and Robin were discussing, always had that affect on first timers. Let's see… towers to visit off the top of the head… there's the Eiffel tower, the Sears Tower, the Leaning Tower of Pisa, and then of course the one we all love the most… Titans Tower.

People would flock from all across the U.S. of A just to take a gander at this technological marvel built by S.T.A.R. Lab technologies. Obviously most of that had to do with the popularity of the Teen Titans themselves, but the Tower itself was just plain impressive as well, in both a technological and artistic sense.

“Yea dude, it totally gets the job done that's for sure.” Beast Boy complimented. Spider-Man shot the green kid a look. No, a small room in your Aunt's house `gets the job done'. This… this is just sweet.

“Heh, if you're impressed of the outside, just wait till you see the inside.” Robin added.

“Yep, a lot of hard work went into this baby.” Beast Boy said rubbing his gloved hands together with a sense of accomplishment.

Cyborg snickered. “Yea B. And you had nothing to do with it.”

Beast Boy attempted to fire a witty comeback, but like that was gonna happen. “Well yea, you're… right. But hey! No one asked me to.”

The most silent of the group, being Raven of course, spoke with a bit of irritation. “Can we go in now?”

Cue the mutual nodding.

“Oh yeah, good call Rae Rae. What were we thinkin'?” Cyborg muttered as he sent a digital signal into the Tower and the giant doors automatically opened.

“Man oh man oh man!” Cyborg yelled as he admired the items in his boxed munchies in his arms. “Nothin' like fresh donuts out of the box baby, yes! That's the way! Uh huh uh huh! I like it! Uh huh uh huh!” The `cyborg' grinned as he took a whiff of the five boxes of fried sweets. “You guys should've got some for yourselves ya'll, you're definitely missin' out.”

Spider-Man eyed the boxes of grease and fat. “Yeah, on about thirty pounds.”

The team broke out in a mused laugh.

“Hah! Thirty pounds. Good one.” Beast Boy chuckled.

“Pretty funny.” Cyborg pointed at the jokester. “So a sense of humor huh? Man I think you're gonna fit right in around here. If the New York City you came from is even remotely similar to the one I know? You'll do fine. Say, is Hell's Kitchen, literally Hell's Kitchen in your alternate universe?”

“Oh yeah. Definitely.” Spidey nodded noting the couple of times he's helped Daredevil around those much troubled parts.

The crimson hero sighed as he was reminded yet again of how far away from home he was. The Tower had caught his attention for awhile but ultimately he was still a bit shaken and concerned about his current predicament. Sure the Titans have been more than friendly so far, and he was certain that they were a good bunch. But he had responsibilities back `home' after all, and the sooner he could go back to his `world' the better.

Although surprisingly. He shrugged. Oh well, whining never gets you anywhere Pete. Who knows? Maybe a little downtime from the NYC is just what you need. These guys seem like a cool bunch. How does that saying go again? Oh yeah! Whenever life hands ya lemons, ya make lemonade right?

Funny he thought that, because as we all know, this kid has been handed enough lemons to fill the Great Lakes with lemonade. And that is a damn fact!

Besides better be positive and get your money's worth Spidey, because when you get back. You're so getting grounded. Spider-Man gave it his best to be positive and perked up with a new sense of optimism. The Titans noticed this in his strut as he didn't look like he was half a zombie anymore.

The teens all made their way inside, except for Raven who suddenly turned towards the beautiful city view across the Jump City bay. Robin also turned, always seeming to be the one noticing these little disturbances when it came to his teammates. One of the many reasons he was their leader mind you.

The Boy Wonder curiously glared. “Is there a problem?”

Raven sighed. “You mean besides the fact that we're letting a total stranger into our team hastily yet again, and not learning from our past mistakes?” She asked sarcastically. “Yea I guess you could say so.”

“Heh, maybe we are, but if it's true that this guy had to deal with Larry and his antics. I think he deserves some slack.” Robin countered, knowing first hand the headache that comes when dealing with the abomination known as Larry. “Anyway, what's the matter Raven? Are you getting bad vibes from him?”

Raven didn't turn and only shrugged. “Sad to say… but I'm not. He seems to be sincere.”

Robin then raised a brow. “Then uh… what's the matter?”

“I don't know, but I am feeling something troublesome, although it's not from him. There's something or some `things' out there that shouldn't be here.” Her eyes closed.

There was a pause.

“Well Raven, whatever it is we'll be ready.” Robin grinned. “We always are, remember?”

Raven just `uh huh'd' him and then quickly made her way into the building while Robin stood a bit concerned at his friend's brief revelation. He ultimately shrugged and soon all six teens were inside the most prestigious base this side of the west coast, with of course Spider-Man actually finding something to look forward to for a change.

“Um, ya know guys. Maybe this guy… is Larry?” Beast Boy asked Robin who, like the changeling, was also staring blankly. Actually the whole Titans team was staring blankly. Anyone would really, at the rate Spider-Man was moving around, examining every nook and cranny of the Titans living room.

Wall crawling… examining. Super jumping… examining. Back flipping… examining. Spider sprinting… examining. You get the picture don't ya?

This madness had to have gone on for about ten minutes as the self-proclaimed tech geek took his frantic gander around, totally psyched about what was in this tower of a `teenagers dream'.

”Dude, ya gotta check out the clapper Cyborg just installed in the kitchen.” Beast Boy hinted.

A clapper? NO WAY!

The arachnoid hesitantly clapped twice with a surplus of anticipation that would rival a toddler during Christmas Eve. The Titan's kitchen lights `magically' came on. He repeated the claps a bit quicker this time and they went off. Spider-Man paused and grinned behind his mask like a devilish child. It was officially jingle time and the Titans gave BB a stern stare as they knew what was coming.

“Clap on!” (Clap, Clap!) “Clap off!” (Clap, Clap!) “Clap on! Clap off! The Clapper!” (Clap, Clap!)

Sweat drops to the floor galore.

“Sweeeet.” was the only word Spidey muttered as he continued his self-exploration of Titans Tower.

“Well at least he's easily entertained.” Raven muttered to the group as they continued to stare down a finally `upbeat' Spider-Man.

“I told ya'll he'd fit right in.” Cyborg said who was infamous for his simple tastes in life as well. This of course consisted of cars, women, and videogames mainly. But seriously folks! Aren't all teenage males like that? Oh please, don't lie to yourself guys!

Spider-Man gave the `awesome' room a good hard stare down. “Man this is straight out of MTV Cribs or something.” He suddenly grew puzzled. “So let me get this straight, you guys have this place, just because you guys are super heroes?”

“Uh, just because we're super heroes?” Raven asked with a sense of insult. The crimson hero quickly back pedaled. “Hehe, sorry, I didn't mean it to sound that way. It's just that… where I come from, I hardly get this kind of treatment.”

“Wait… so how do ya get treated?” Beast Boy asked. Spider-Man scratched his chin. He wanted to say `like crap' but decided to go with a more clean reply.

“Like dirt.”

Pause.

“Wait a sec. You save people's lives and they treat you like… `dirt'?” Cyborg inquired a bit surprised.

“Uh yeah, like trash, like mildew, like cow dung, like dookie. Yep all those things, but I think `like dirt' will do fine.”

The Titans looked at one another, not understanding why or how something like that would occur. These five teens were literally idolized by their fellow Jump City citizens, and rightfully so. How could a hero be treated so lowly? Was he exaggerating? Of course we all know the answer to that one. HELL NO!

“Friend Spider-Man, what does your dwelling resemble?” Starfire chimed in. The crimson hero, who was quite intrigued by this girl's elegant yet twisted English, was about to reply but almost felt ashamed at the truth; especially after seeing this wonderful complex known as Titans Tower.

He quickly looked for a way out of the question. “Uuuh, that's not important… but uh…”

Glancing… glancing… more glancing… and BINGO! He found it.

He slowly walked over to the large T.V. screen that clearly stood out most in the Titans living room, bringing everything to a screeching halt. The teen fell on his knees at the shear beauty and size of this mega sized HD flat screen TV. “It's… too… beautiful… for… words…”

Beast Boy, Robin and Cyborg quickly joined him in admiring it. Cyborg muttered wide eyed. “She's a beauty ain't she?”

“Good times. Good times.” Robin added with a nod.

“So many memories...” Beast Boy sighed, his green eyes being just as large as his two closest friends'. Ah yes! The `can't lose' combination of this leviathan of a T.V. and an in mint condition Gamestation XL 2000. Slap in a `Joe knockoff Halo 2' Disc and it was a teenager's shrine to eternal bliss one could call it.

The four wiped their eyes as if a tear of utter appreciation had literally run down their faces. Starfire and Raven looked at one another with shrugs, still to this day not completely understanding their male teammates' urges to prove dominance through using pixilated robots to destroy one another.

“Hey I know we're having fun glaring and all, but before we set you lose Spidey we gotta register you with the people at S.T.A.R. Labs. So, you can go on payroll of course.” Robin intervened.

“S.T.A.R. Labs huh? Hmmm they're not going to test me like some sorta lab rat are they?”

“They might.” Raven said, clearly with intentions to worry the newbie. Spider-Man became a bit alert, not too familiar with this girl's infamous cynicism just yet.

“No,” Cyborg shot a look at Raven and turned back. “They won't.”

The sorceress rolled her eyes.

Spider-Man suddenly realized Robin said the word `payroll'. “HOLD UP! You get paid for being a super hero?”

“Well yea duh. How else are we supposed to survive?” Beast Boy retorted. Spider-Man shrugged. If the Titans only knew the feeling of trying to keep two jobs, having to go to school, and being a super-hero for `free', they'd be bowing to this kid in red. They get paid?! And get this palace for free? Spidey, you're definitely living in the wrong universe. Oh yeah.

After about five minutes of Cyborg setting up an over the phone appointment, which consisted of being bumped around by the operator for a good four minutes, the half-droid finally succeeded. Spider-Man stood ready to be examined by a female S.T.A.R. lab representative over a satellite connection.

“So let me guess here… you're from Dakota?”

“Uh no. But just outta curiosity do you mean North Dakota? Or South Dakota?” Spider-Man suddenly remembered he wasn't in his `universe'. “Or would it be East Dakota? Or maybe West Dakota? No! It's South-west Dakota isn't it? Or maybe-”

Thankfully Cyborg intervened (God bless his soul). “He's from New York City. But tell me. Why the heck would you think he's from Dakota?”

“Well, whenever I see these whacked out colorful costumes, I always assume that. That city has some really funky dressed heroes that's for sure.”

“Hah, Static would love to hear that.”

“Heh, I'm sure he would.”

Spider-Man nodded slowly. “Oh so there's a Dakota `City' now... figures… but HEY! Hold on a sec! What's wrong with my costume?”

Laughs from most of the Titans and the S.T.A.R. labs official were his only reply. After about ten more minutes of questioning that consisted of the basic `How old are you?', `Do you have any allergies?', and `Aren't those Spider tights uncomfortable?' ultimately it came down to one more test. They wanted to see Spider-Man run through the gauntlet at least once, to see just how `real of a deal' he was.

Oh yeah! The gauntlet! The Titans ultimate crime fighting training program! The same program Terra had to run through when she first became a Titan. The one where she broke the record, set by the teen that created it himself, Cyborg. But one has to also remember that she literally tore down the training structure as well. Would Spider-Man have a similar run through?

The Teen Titans would have to wait to find out because the `When there's trouble you know who to call' beeping tone came off on all Titan communicators. Spider-Man put his hands at waist feeling a bit left out. “Hey if I'm gonna be a `Titan' don't I get to have one of those?”

“Sure you do, but you're forgetting one thing.” Raven smirked. “You're not a Titan yet.” The girl finished with the slightest hint of malice which Spider-Man easily sensed. I guess someone's still bitter. I said I was sorry already. Sheesh.

Robin looked towards Spider-Man. “Titan or not you're training on the job. We got trouble, it's Mumbo Jumbo.”

“Aw man, not that blue geezer again.” Cyborg sighed. Beast Boy also became a bit bummed. “Dude doesn't that guy ever run out of tricks? I mean you can only pull a rabbit out of a hat so many times ya know?”

“Do not be saddened friends! Let us stop the Mumbo Jumbo again!” Starfire yelled as she prepared to take off.

Spider-Man rubbed his chin. “Er… what's a `Mumbo Gumbo'? Sounds kinda tastey.”

There was a pause and the scene could be basically described with two words really…

`Blank stares'

Oh yea that's right. Just `Blank Stares'

“Okay… uh… Titans uh… go.”

And the Titans were now officially off to the races!

( - Jump City's Most Popular The Quik-E-Mart - )

Alright who doesn't love magic tricks?

The answer is no one of course! They are just too fun and too entertaining! Oh you know it! From the simple `pick a card any card' trick, to the more complex `Siegfried and Roy white tiger on a unicycle' trick (Poor Roy) they all make our inner child laugh with glee.

But this certain magician, unlike David Copperfield, was one you wouldn't want to run into. That is, unless you wanted to be stripped of all of your belongings through the use of a vacuum like hat trick of course. You want a first hand testimonial to this? Just ask this poor convenient store clerk, who is tied from head to toe with `magic' ribbons over here. He was learning it the hard way obviously.

“Behold! I the great Mumbo Jumbo shall perform one last trick for your distinct pleasure.” The blue skinned magician removed his hat and tapped it twice with his magical wand. “Hocus, POCUS!”

Suddenly the cash register to the `Quik-E-Mart' convenient store shot open and the `green' began to pour into his hat like junk food into Cyborg's mouth. After about ten seconds of nonchalant whistling the `trick' was complete and Mumbo swiftly placed his hat atop his head.

Ladies and gentlemen, you have just experienced the vacuum like hat trick. (Applause)

“Thank you, thank you, thank you! You have been a wonderful audience! The Amazing Mumbo must now take his leave. You've been too kind!” The magician quickly made his break for the exit but was stopped via the store door slamming into his face. The blow sent the `great' Mumbo soaring back in a dazed heap. Two easily recognizable voices filled the room.

“Venom, come on! I've been dying to know.”

Sighs. “Well go `semi-hero' and find out for yourself. We did for awhile and it wasn't all that bad.”

“Me? Carnage? A semi-hero? BWAHA! Don't give me that crap daddy-o. Just tell me! How was it working with her?”

Even more sighs. “Remind us, because we've honestly been trying to channel your voice out the last hour. How was it working with `who' again?”

Cassidy gave a blank stare. “HOW WAS IT WORKING WITH MRS. FANTASTIC GOD DAMMIT?”

“Oh right, her!” Venom nodded with a smile. “It was great offspring. We thoroughly enjoyed kicking your ass along side her.” (BTW that Jessica Alba (New Fantastic Four movie!) is just pure SIZZLE isn't she? OH YEAH!)

Carnage only scoffed at the memory. “Yea well, honestly? That girl can kick my ass anytime she wants to.” Carnage's eyes turned into hearts. “Why oh why can't there be a girl just like her that would actually enjoy a good innocent decapitation here and there? Now that would be a dream date wouldn't it?”

“Uh yeah sure, whatever.” Venom muttered.

With that funny look on his face, Carnage sighed as he slowly peered downward, noticing a certain magician's hat and wand.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa Brock. Well if it isn't my lucky day?”

“Well it certainly isn't ours.” Venom replied. Cassidy made a grab for both of the items. He tossed the hat to Eddie. “Well, now it's you're lucky day.”

Venom raised his brow at the hat. “Awesome, we can now die happily.”

Carnage began waving the wand around like an orchestra conductor, chanting a `devil's chant. “SUPER CALI FRAGILISTIC EXPEE ALLEY DOCIOUS! SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING ATROCIOUS!” Carnage pointed the wand at Venom. Of course nothing happened. Carnage quickly grew angry.

“Dude this thing is just a piece of crap.” Cassidy grabbed the wand and snapped it in half, tossing the remains outside the door.

“NOOOOOOOOOOO!”

The two symbiotes heard the scream and turned to look at a furious blue man, who was now actually a bit `red'. “YOU FOOLS! THAT WAS MY WAND!”

Carnage and Venom looked at one another with a shrug. They then glanced back at the one and only Mumbo Jumbo. Cassidy smirked. “Well I guess now you have two wands. Hehe.”

“Why you little-” Mumbo yelled but remembered he had more important business to attend to then to mess with two `kids'. He quickly turned towards the teenage Brock who was holding his still in one piece hat. “Now be a dear boy hand over the hat, and I'll let you two kids run along. You're wasting my time.”

Eddie only laughed. “Sorry `blue', but finders keepers, losers weepers.”

Cassidy scoffed. “Man you must buy a lot of tissues eh?” The two disguised symbiotic teens hooted at Mumbo who began to give an even more intense shade of red. “Do you brats know who you're dealing with?”

The two neo-teens suddenly struck a thinking pose. They mockingly stood in the pause for about half a minute. “OH I KNOW-I KNOW-I KNOW-I KNOW!”

All ears were with Carnage.

“You're POPPA SMURF!”

Venom began to point and stutter. “HOLY SHIT! IT IS!! THIS IS SMURFIN' FANTASTIC!” The older symbiote mocked. “You all look so much smaller on T.V.”

The teens laughed their heads off as Mumbo had just about enough. “Give me that!” The magician made a grab at his hat but Venom pulled it away. “Now come on. Let's be reasonable shall `we'? By law this hat is now mine isn't it? But we'll be a nice symbiote today! Why don't we share it?”

Venom then literally tore the hat right down the middle and handed half of it to Mumbo who was boiling angry. Carnage noticed the man's irate look. “Aw come on `blue', it's not the hat or the wand that makes a magician.”

Mumbo scowled. “The great Mumbo Jumbo will not be lectured on `magic' by some snot nosed kid. Besides what do you know about magic?”

The two symbiotes paused trying to come to grips that someone would actually name themselves `Mumbo Jumbo'. Ultimately they shrugged and Carnage continued. “Oh come on! Don't judge a book by its cover. Behind this handsome face is a magician waiting to be unlocked. Wanna see?”

The blue skin man was totally intrigued and besides himself in laughter. “Fine, let us see a trick. This oughta be good.”

Carnage looked at Venom who motioned with his hands that the stage was his. Cassidy cracked his knuckles and rubbed his hands together. “Alright! The great Cletus Cassidy will now perform his signature trick called… er… `The great Cletus Cassidy's signature trick'. Basically I will make you disappear, my blue friend.”

“Hah! You're going to make me disappear?”

“That's right.” Carnage began to wiggle his fingers as he pointed them at Mumbo who was only staring in amusement at the `mocking' magician. Cassidy's hands suddenly exploded towards the blue skin man. “ALAKABOOM!”

To no surprise nothing happened which made Mumbo laugh hysterically. “Leave the magic to us real magicians kid. And by the way it's not `Alakaboom', it's `Alakazam' ya nitwit.”

Carnage raised a brow. “Really? Wow, I could've sworn it was Alakaboom. Let's give it another shot shall we?” The symbiote got back into his `mocking stance'. “Alaka-”

Suddenly a red tendril shot out of Cassidy's hand and slammed into Mumbo sending him on a wild ride across the room. Eventually the blue man met the wall making a noise that certainly brought some `glee' into Carnage's system.

BOOM!

“Hah! I totally knew it!” Carnage laughed as he had just K.O'd Mumbo Jumbo.

“Well now if we don't gotta natural Houdini on our hands.” Venom mocked.

“Damn straight we do.”

“Oh please offspring. That was a mediocre trick.”

Carnage snickered. “Well I was going to do that whole `saw the assistant in half and put the assistant back together again' trick, but it would have been against my nature to do that second part, if ya know what I mean.”

Venom only chuckled as the boy in black made his way over to the machine that these two symbiotes have been searching of for the past half hour. Carnage followed and the two began to stare at their `quest item' in such awe that you would swear they were staring at the Ring of Power and they themselves were the `Fellowship'.

It was the always infamous!

SLURPIE MACHINE!

The two symbiotes looked at one another and grinned as to them they had just found heaven.

“CHA-CHING!” They both said in unison.

( - Ten Minutes Later - )

The Titans quickly filed into the parking lot of the Quik-E-Mart led by of course Robin, who took a look at the relatively calm surroundings. It was unusual to say the least, especially because the Titans knew how big of a loud mouth Mumbo was.

“Uh, where's Mumbo?”

“He's probably still inside.” Cyborgs answered. Just then two boys, in their early teens, walked out the convenient store completely wide eyed. The Titans peered over to that direction with confused faces. The boys began to speak to one another.

“Uh… Kale… did you just see what I saw?” The black haired boy muttered blankly. The brown haired one spoke just as zombie-ishly. “I think so Orion, I think so…”

The two then suddenly screamed. “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

The Titans quickly rushed over to the distraught boys who were now on the floor looking to the sky as if God himself had forsaken them.

“What happened?” Robin asked. The two just shook their heads. “It's too awful… too awful…” The boys muttered.

Robin turned to the rest of the Titans. “Guys, we better be careful. We don't…”

Suddenly the door to the convenient store shot open as our favorite arachnid hero shot into the store, apparently this guy was still used to being the `solo-act'. He ran into the store. “Alright whoever you… WHOA!”

CRAAAAAAASH!

“Uh that doesn't sound too good.” Beast Boy said as the rest of the Titans carefully made their way into the store. Robin busted the door open and the Titans couldn't help but sweat drop at what they saw.

Spider-Man was on the floor totally laid out and covered with cans of Pepsi cola. He rubbed his head as he lifted himself into a seated position. Cyborg started to tremble. “Is that… melted Slushie all over the floor?”

GASPS.

The half-droid then took a gander over at the Slushie machine in the corner and his eyes doubled in size. “What… kind… of… monster… would… do… this?” He said, being way too dramatic if you'd ask any of the other Titans.

Spider-Man gave a “Ugh.” as his costume was totally soaked in Slushie. “Darn, that'll leave a stain.” He commented as he pulled at his suit.

“And that is why Robin is the one that usually leads us in.” Beast Boy snickered. Spider-Man nodded with a half-assed thumbs up, “Yea, I'm really not used to this whole `team' concept thing yet.”

The Titans then suddenly heard a groan from across the room and took note of the huge hole in the wall that had been created. Raven quickly phased over to take a peak. “Well guys I think I found Mumbo… or at least parts of Mumbo.”

The Titans made their way over.

“Um, the Mumbo looks extremely hurt, we should aid him.” Starfire said with concern.

Robin scowled. “I guess someone got to him first. We better get an ambulance over here, he doesn't look too good.”

“Man! We don't need an ambulance! We need a Slurpie machine repair man!” Cyborg yelled. He was justly ignored.

The Titans looked over Mumbo with a look of pity on their faces. Beast Boy gave a `whoa' type look at the hole in the wall. “Dudes, who did this?”

“A monster I tell you… a psychotic monster…” Cyborg muttered, still crying over the defunct Slurpie machine. “Don't worry I'll fix you baby, we have had way too many good times together. Don't leave me now!” The half-droid hugged the machine in a consoling type manner.

“The guy really loves his slushies doesn't he?” Spider-Man asked.

“You don't even want to know.” Raven replied. The always crime fighting minded Robin rubbed his chin with his gloved hand. “Who could've done this?”

“Who knows? Maybe there's new heroes in town or something.” Beast Boy said as he stretched. Raven scowled. “I highly doubt that.”

“Yea, A hero wouldn't have done this B! No way!”

Beast Boy sighed. “Oh God, Cy will you get away from the Slurpie machine already?” Cyborg reluctantly complied walking over to his teammates with his head hung low. Obviously he was taking this way too hard, but we all know about grieving... it's a process no matter how inane the cause of it is.

Robin disregarded all the hoopla and brought some focus back to the group. “Well team, I guess our job here is uh… done. Let's regroup at the tower and try to get to the bottom of this.”

“Alright Robin. That sounds super but uh…” Spider-Man took a glance at his soaked costume. “When we get back, I gotta change into my-”

The beauty of epiphanies cannot be described better than how Spider-Man did it. “Oh boy.”

“What is the problem friend?” Starfire asked.

“Well I uh don't have any spare costumes with me, and call me crazy but I really don't wanna be marinated in Cherry slurpie for too long ya know? Five minutes is okay… but I don't think I can take much more than that.”

“Good point.” Cyborg said. The team was silent, but Starfire quickly had an idea. “Friends! Why not we all go to the Mall of Shopping so friend Spider-Man can choose different attires?!”

“Sounds like an awesome plan to me.” Beast Boy said with a nod. Robin gave a questioning glare. “I don't know guys…”

Starfire, Cyborg, and Beast Boy became wide-eyed and squealed the word. “Puuuhlleeeeeeeeeeeze.”

Robin sighed in defeat. “I guess a little stop wouldn't hurt `too' much.”

Spider-Man chuckled. “I hope this isn't too much trouble.”

“Do not worry friend Spider-Man. I will aid you in your selection! We will be having the `grandest of times'.” Starfire said happily as she took the web head's by the wrist to drag him out of the store. “For some reason… I highly doubt that.” Spidey muttered worryingly as he was being forced to be Starfire's Ken doll for the day.

“You know I almost feel sorry for him.” Raven commented.

Robin, Beast Boy, and Cyborg couldn't stop laughing as they quickly followed, not wanting to miss out on the fun. Of course Raven was the last one out. She took a quick look around getting the bad same vibes she did awhile ago. “Who did this?” she scowled.

( - Downtown Jump City - )

Venom and Carnage sat literally hunched over and limp on a street curb, which was littered with cups and cups and cups and cups of empty and half-empty Slushie remains. The two literally looked sick to their stomachs and Cassidy attempted to get up only to grab at his head.

“Oow…”

“What?” Venom asked as he was on his furious decent from his `sugar high'.

“This is wicked… and I mean wicked… BRAIN FREEEEEEZE!” Cassidy screamed as he shook his head wildly. Venom clutched at his stomach. “Please offspring… don't mention `food' to us right now.”

Ah yes, `Brain Freeze'. A symbiote's favorite frozen desert.

The two symbiotes slumped over clearly over `Slurpied'. A voice suddenly shot out to the two teens.

“Looks like you two need assistance.” The voice said.

The half-dazed symbiotes just groaned as they slowly got up. Venom rubbed his head, forcing himself into a state of concentration. “And who the hell are you?”

“You can call me a friend.”

“Hmm, why don't I just call you my next victim?” Carnage shot as he lifted his face off the ground to join his `dad', still reeling off his slurpie binge. The voice laughed.

“Intensity, I like it! I can sense the emotions needed to be great killers in the both of you.” The owner of the voice turned to Carnage. “And that horrific transformation you pulled back awhile ago. I must say I am impressed.”

Carnage and Venom looked at one another with a shrug. “What do you want?”

“The potential in the two of you is limitless, I can feel it. You both can be molded into quite the villains.”

“Newsflash old man! We're already quite the villain.” Venom said clearly talking only about himself, which made Carnage a bit perturbed. Of course the person speaking to them couldn't catch the `detail'.

“I see. Well allow me to introduce myself anyway. The name is Blood.” The white haired man smiled. “Brother Blood.”

Carnage slowly nodded. “Well my name is Bond. James Bond.” The two symbiotes laughed but quickly clutched their heads from post stinging `brain freeze'.

Brother Blood shrugged. “Let's cut to the chase shall we? I own a `school' for gifted teens, just like yourselves. It is a school that can teach you the ways to becoming the perfect villain. Preparing you for any problem the `noble' ones could give you.”

Pause.

“A school huh? And let us guess. You want us to join this school of yours we are assuming?” Venom asked.

“Perceptive.”

“Sorry, but we're not interested. School is totally not cool.” Carnage replied.

“Hah, this isn't like any school my friends. Here,” Brother Blood quickly reached behind his robe and pulled out a `brochure'. “Read this.” Venom and Carnage shrugged as the man handed it to them. Carnage took it and began looking over it.

“The H - I - V - E?” Carnage asked as he glanced at the cover. “This doesn't have anything to do with the Y M C A does it?” (IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE H I V E! IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE H I V E HE!)

Venom and Carnage gave worried looks at the thought of that. Blood scowled, getting a bit perturbed by their idiocy. “No.”

The two symbiotes sighed in relief as they went down the list. Carnage's eyes grew a bit wide. “Whoa wait a second here… we get all this?!”

Brother Blood nodded.

“A video arcade, your own room, free food, target practice dummies and a fifty dollar gift certificate to Evil R Us?!” Carnage extended a hand. “Dude screw it. I'm in.”

Venom quickly batted his offspring's hand away. “Hold on. What's in this for you?”

Blood smiled. “Why you'd be under my supervision of course. You'll have to obey my orders and show up to class. Simple really.”

“Hah, sorry old man, but we're no one's pawn.”

“But Brock there's a freakin' weight room!”

Eddie paused. “Holy crap really?”

Brother Blood smiled as his eyes began to give a red glow. Venom suddenly grew a bit alert as he felt something in his mind click. The symbiote quickly shrugged it off. Wait was that? Yes… yes it was a mind trick. Heh we are intrigued, if it weren't for the symbiote Brock's mind would've been at his mercy. Hmmm, maybe we can learn a few tricks after all.

Venom slowly nodded playing along. “Actually the weight room does sound good. And it did say free food right?”

“No freakin' shit it does. But who cares about that crap? We get our own dorm rooms man! Totally boss. We're definitely taking the offer.” Carnage pranced. Brother Blood smiled. “Excellent. But before you two can join, you both are going to have to pull a job to prove your worth. I am confident you two will get it done.”

The symbiotes then did something that they usually never did. They listened attentively.

“I have three students that need to be freed from prison.” Blood handed Venom a piece of paper with the information needed for the mission.

Carnage scoffed. “Prison huh? Why does that word always seem to hit home with me?”

“You two will strike tonight and when you succeed? You will be invited to become part of the most prestigious school of villains in the world. The H.I.V.E.”

The two symbiotes snickered as they were definitely familiar with Jail breaks. The two began to telepathically speak to one another via the alien suits.

“This is perfect offspring, we can use this hidden base of his as a hiding spot till we decide to pounce on Spider-Man.”

“Oh right… but who gives a flying hoot? We get our own dorm rooms man!”

“(Sigh)”

“What?”

“You know… you… you… Grr, you should just shut the hell up.”

Throat clear. “So you now know my name. I would like the same from you.”

The two symbiotes grinned.

“Venom.”

“Carnage.”

Blood laughed. “Hmmm, strong names. I only hope you two can live up to those names.”

Venom and Carnage only snickered at the comment because they knew if one would ask any being who has had to deal with these two particular freaks of nature. They would answer that statement with one simple yet loud resounding…

`YES!'

Jump City was in trouble, oh yes it freakin' was!

A/N: You're done playa! ;) Wasn't that fun?! Time to answer reviews!

Chaos Damn It! : Man that a flattering review ;). I appreciate it! And yea it seems like not a lot of people like to review. But it's all good. Your review was worth the work. Teehee. Anyway glad you enjoyed the first two chappies. I hope this one will be a keeper as well. I'm out!