Fan Fiction ❯ The Game We Play ❯ Terrible For You ( Chapter 20 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Dark Jester 
Consequences suck.
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Adventure / Angst / Drama / Psychological / Romance | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 12.18.2002 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.6K | Visits: 268 | Status: Completed
Consequences suck.
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Adventure / Angst / Drama / Psychological / Romance | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 12.18.2002 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.6K | Visits: 268 | Status: Completed
Chapter 20 - Terrible For You
For the twentieth time in about fifteen minutes, Bruce kissed the pale, green-fringed forehead belonging to his lover. For the twenty-second time, he traced a circle around the tip of a delicate shoulder with his fingers. He felt good, but it was mixed with a hint of guilt. He didn't feel like he'd really been able to communicate the depths of what he was feeling yet, no matter what he did.
Still dozing peacefully, Joker made a soft noise and shifted, tickled by Bruce's fingers on his skin. He muttered to himself while burying his face in his arm, talking to somebody Bruce couldn't see. "We'll... hehe.. stray so far... hee..."
Bruce tilted his head down to watch the Joker's dream conversation. He tried to guess who he was talking to.
"No, you don't," Joker protested weakly, his words all slurring together. "I'm... better... hee..." The clown shifted again and straightened out his arm - which made itself comfortable underneath Bruce's chin. "...'e doesn't need you..."
Bruce grinned. Was he talking to Robin?
All at once, Joker was wide awake and blinking repeatedly to get his brain going. "Bruce?" he asked, yawning afterward.
"Mmm hmm." Bruce said, pulling him into an embrace.
Joker smiled happily and snuggled into the large chest in front of him, letting loose another, longer yawn. He closed his eyes and let himself simply drift.
"I'm not getting rid of Robin." Bruce teased gently, wondering how the Joker would react.
"Hm?" Joker squinted and tilted his head to look meet his lover's pretty blue eyes. "Why not? I'm at least ten times the fighter he'll ever be." He giggled softly and balled a fist into Bruce's chest.
"Because sleeping with me is totally out of the question for Robin." He kidded.
"Ohhhh, well that makes sense, then." Joker couldn't help the feeling of pride that spread itself around his thoughts. "Where IS Robin, anyway? I haven't seen him roosting here. Does he not live with you? I thought you said he was your so-... hey! Bruce Wayne adopted a boy from the circus, didn't he? The Flying something-or-others... Is that Robin?"
"No." Bruce said. "That's not Robin. Dick's a cop in Bludhaven."
Joker's forehead wrinkled thoughtfully. "But you've had several Robins, so of course that isn't him NOW. That means... WAS he once Robin? This Dick fellow?"
"I'm not at liberty to say." Bruce said diplomatically.
With a frown, Joker grumbled, "I'm disappointed. But it doesn't matter. I can tell your answer would've been yes had you told me. Otherwise you would've very definitely said no. So there. Ha!" He stuck out his tongue and made a face.
"I'm not at liberty to say." Bruce repeated with a grin.
"Idioso," Joker teased, bumping his forehead into Bruce's chin. "You big weirdo."
"Littler weirdo." Bruce shot back.
Joker started laughing harder, immediately noting the absurdity of the comment. "I may be smaller, but I'm prettier."
"Okay, I'll give you that one."
Joker smiled contently and laid on Bruce's pillow. He reached up to stroke the chin he'd memorized over the years. "I was wondering..." The pale man licked his lips and swallowed. "...about my sickness. If you were... theoretically speaking, able to save me... I wanted to know... I mean that I... what... would you do with me?" Joker averted his eyes, afraid of the answer.
Bruce thought about this for quite a while before answering.
"That would depend on you." He finally said.
"How do you mean? Wouldn't you just take me back to Arkham?"
"No." That answer came immediately.
"Why not?" Joker lifted a curious eyebrow. "You have no practical use for me."
Bruce's expression became pained and confused. "After what just happened, do you think that practicality actually comes into play here?"
Joker winced and felt his face get warm. What Bruce said hurt... it struck a chord. "You won't even admit to who Robin was... What would make me think you'd want me around indefinitely? And what about your duty to the city? Your little clan? What about them? What happens when they come around with questions? What happens when the Commissioner wants to know what happened to me?" He was brimming with questions, and terrified that he'd never live to see the answers.
"Robin's identity isn't my secret to tell." Bruce explained. "I used to think it was, but I understand better now. As for the other things, I'm doing my duty to the city by getting a violent criminal off the streets, and just because people ask questions doesn't mean I have to answer them."
"I'm not a criminal," Joker immediately argued. He made a face and put his hand over his mouth. "Forget I said that. I don't want to talk about it. But... would you really keep me around...?"
"Of course I would." Bruce said tenderly. "I have a habit of falling in love with people who are no good for me. Granted, all the others were WOMEN. . ." He trailed off, grinning.
Joker closed his eyes and snuggled into Bruce's arms, his face serene. "That means you love me...?" He paused to wait for an answer... but then his eyes snapped open as he realized something. "Hey! You were suggesting I'm no good for you! You dirty little rodent!" He growled and bit the other man's chest lightly.
Bruce jumped, then started laughing. "You're terrible for me!" He exclaimed. "And now I need a tetanus shot!"
Joker put a playfully surprised expression on his face and pinched Bruce's stomach. "Watch it! I'll give you cooties if you don't play nice!"
"If you've got cooties, I've already got. . . them. . ." Bruce's eyes widened. "Oh God."
Joker snickered and settled down again... but then looked back up at Bruce, his eyes serious. He didn't dare speak.
Bruce groaned and dropped his head forward. "I wasn't thinking." He grumbled. "Damn it."
All the blood drained from Joker's face as he stared in shock up at Bruce. "No," he whispered. Quickly, he sat up in bed and moved away, his heart jumping and skipping beats every few moments. "NO!"
Bruce nodded, his emotions shutting down again. "It's a distinct possibility."
Joker snarled angrily and climbed out of bed, pulling on his clothes as he went. He was helpless, lost and brutally ashamed... sickened to the core. A wave of tension threw him for a loop as he stumbled to get a good hold of anything. The nearby medical table served the purpose, and the Joker stood there, panting. "I'm sorry," was all he could manage.
Batman shook his head in small, quick, side to side motions. He was obviously deep in thought. "Could be nothing. Had it been the other way around, I'd be worried, but. . . Could be nothing."
"What... what about the bullet wound on your thigh?" Joker inquired, his voice catching in his throat.
Batman's eyes narrowed as he thought about that point, then he shook his head. "The odds against that having any effect are astronomical." He said. "Unless you bled on my leg at some point."
In a low growl, Joker answered, "Which would have been very possible... I AM terrible for you."
Batman shrugged. "I've been dying before. I'm still here."
"And I'm dying right now, and I'm still here. But for how long?"
Intense blue eyes met his. "Neither of us is going to die."
"I am," Joker responded blandly. "And you know it." He swallowed hard and sank down onto the floor.
"You're stronger than that." Batman snapped. "Fight it."
"I can't." Joker didn't even think about his answer when he gave it. He sank into a well of self-hatred and bent over on the floor, holding his head in his hands.
"Damn it, Jack! Think about someone other than yourself here!" Batman shouted.
His thundering voice echoed out of the Batcave, and resonated into the ears of a peeping butler. Alfred had been listening in since they'd started talking.
"Don't SCREAM at me!" Joker snapped, his face contorted with anger. "I only think of you!"
"THEN YOU'LL. . ." Batman cleared his throat and started again, quietly. Controlled. "Then you'll stop talking about dying. I don't want you to die. I need that cycle to end."
Joker nodded quietly and reached up to rub the back of his neck, feeling it suddenly turn rigid. Right about then, he noticed all of his limbs felt awkward, suddenly - tense. "I need to know you love me."
Bruce blinked rapidly, clearing away the shadows that came over his view of the world when the Bat took control. He nodded slightly, and his eyes softened. "I don't know why you don't already know." He said. "But if you need to hear me say it. . . I do love you."
Joker nodded and smiled affectionately. "I did need to hear it. You have no idea how badly. I... won't talk about dying anymore, Bruce."
Bruce nodded. "It's kind of lonely over here." He hinted.
"Sorry," Joker muttered again. He climbed up to his feet and took a few steps toward the bed, but lost his footing suddenly and tripped over nothing, catching himself on the foot of the bed. "I think it's happening again." He squeezed his eyes closed and crawled up onto the covers.
"What's wrong? Are you dizzy?" Bruce asked, concern evident on his face.
"Yeah... and I feel heavy." Joker reached out for Bruce and grabbed onto his knee. Slowly, things changed... the throbbing in his head dulled and his body started to shift back toward being normal. "I'm okay, I think..."
Bruce pulled him up into a tight embrace. "It'll be okay." He said. "It'll be okay."
*
For the twentieth time in about fifteen minutes, Bruce kissed the pale, green-fringed forehead belonging to his lover. For the twenty-second time, he traced a circle around the tip of a delicate shoulder with his fingers. He felt good, but it was mixed with a hint of guilt. He didn't feel like he'd really been able to communicate the depths of what he was feeling yet, no matter what he did.
Still dozing peacefully, Joker made a soft noise and shifted, tickled by Bruce's fingers on his skin. He muttered to himself while burying his face in his arm, talking to somebody Bruce couldn't see. "We'll... hehe.. stray so far... hee..."
Bruce tilted his head down to watch the Joker's dream conversation. He tried to guess who he was talking to.
"No, you don't," Joker protested weakly, his words all slurring together. "I'm... better... hee..." The clown shifted again and straightened out his arm - which made itself comfortable underneath Bruce's chin. "...'e doesn't need you..."
Bruce grinned. Was he talking to Robin?
All at once, Joker was wide awake and blinking repeatedly to get his brain going. "Bruce?" he asked, yawning afterward.
"Mmm hmm." Bruce said, pulling him into an embrace.
Joker smiled happily and snuggled into the large chest in front of him, letting loose another, longer yawn. He closed his eyes and let himself simply drift.
"I'm not getting rid of Robin." Bruce teased gently, wondering how the Joker would react.
"Hm?" Joker squinted and tilted his head to look meet his lover's pretty blue eyes. "Why not? I'm at least ten times the fighter he'll ever be." He giggled softly and balled a fist into Bruce's chest.
"Because sleeping with me is totally out of the question for Robin." He kidded.
"Ohhhh, well that makes sense, then." Joker couldn't help the feeling of pride that spread itself around his thoughts. "Where IS Robin, anyway? I haven't seen him roosting here. Does he not live with you? I thought you said he was your so-... hey! Bruce Wayne adopted a boy from the circus, didn't he? The Flying something-or-others... Is that Robin?"
"No." Bruce said. "That's not Robin. Dick's a cop in Bludhaven."
Joker's forehead wrinkled thoughtfully. "But you've had several Robins, so of course that isn't him NOW. That means... WAS he once Robin? This Dick fellow?"
"I'm not at liberty to say." Bruce said diplomatically.
With a frown, Joker grumbled, "I'm disappointed. But it doesn't matter. I can tell your answer would've been yes had you told me. Otherwise you would've very definitely said no. So there. Ha!" He stuck out his tongue and made a face.
"I'm not at liberty to say." Bruce repeated with a grin.
"Idioso," Joker teased, bumping his forehead into Bruce's chin. "You big weirdo."
"Littler weirdo." Bruce shot back.
Joker started laughing harder, immediately noting the absurdity of the comment. "I may be smaller, but I'm prettier."
"Okay, I'll give you that one."
Joker smiled contently and laid on Bruce's pillow. He reached up to stroke the chin he'd memorized over the years. "I was wondering..." The pale man licked his lips and swallowed. "...about my sickness. If you were... theoretically speaking, able to save me... I wanted to know... I mean that I... what... would you do with me?" Joker averted his eyes, afraid of the answer.
Bruce thought about this for quite a while before answering.
"That would depend on you." He finally said.
"How do you mean? Wouldn't you just take me back to Arkham?"
"No." That answer came immediately.
"Why not?" Joker lifted a curious eyebrow. "You have no practical use for me."
Bruce's expression became pained and confused. "After what just happened, do you think that practicality actually comes into play here?"
Joker winced and felt his face get warm. What Bruce said hurt... it struck a chord. "You won't even admit to who Robin was... What would make me think you'd want me around indefinitely? And what about your duty to the city? Your little clan? What about them? What happens when they come around with questions? What happens when the Commissioner wants to know what happened to me?" He was brimming with questions, and terrified that he'd never live to see the answers.
"Robin's identity isn't my secret to tell." Bruce explained. "I used to think it was, but I understand better now. As for the other things, I'm doing my duty to the city by getting a violent criminal off the streets, and just because people ask questions doesn't mean I have to answer them."
"I'm not a criminal," Joker immediately argued. He made a face and put his hand over his mouth. "Forget I said that. I don't want to talk about it. But... would you really keep me around...?"
"Of course I would." Bruce said tenderly. "I have a habit of falling in love with people who are no good for me. Granted, all the others were WOMEN. . ." He trailed off, grinning.
Joker closed his eyes and snuggled into Bruce's arms, his face serene. "That means you love me...?" He paused to wait for an answer... but then his eyes snapped open as he realized something. "Hey! You were suggesting I'm no good for you! You dirty little rodent!" He growled and bit the other man's chest lightly.
Bruce jumped, then started laughing. "You're terrible for me!" He exclaimed. "And now I need a tetanus shot!"
Joker put a playfully surprised expression on his face and pinched Bruce's stomach. "Watch it! I'll give you cooties if you don't play nice!"
"If you've got cooties, I've already got. . . them. . ." Bruce's eyes widened. "Oh God."
Joker snickered and settled down again... but then looked back up at Bruce, his eyes serious. He didn't dare speak.
Bruce groaned and dropped his head forward. "I wasn't thinking." He grumbled. "Damn it."
All the blood drained from Joker's face as he stared in shock up at Bruce. "No," he whispered. Quickly, he sat up in bed and moved away, his heart jumping and skipping beats every few moments. "NO!"
Bruce nodded, his emotions shutting down again. "It's a distinct possibility."
Joker snarled angrily and climbed out of bed, pulling on his clothes as he went. He was helpless, lost and brutally ashamed... sickened to the core. A wave of tension threw him for a loop as he stumbled to get a good hold of anything. The nearby medical table served the purpose, and the Joker stood there, panting. "I'm sorry," was all he could manage.
Batman shook his head in small, quick, side to side motions. He was obviously deep in thought. "Could be nothing. Had it been the other way around, I'd be worried, but. . . Could be nothing."
"What... what about the bullet wound on your thigh?" Joker inquired, his voice catching in his throat.
Batman's eyes narrowed as he thought about that point, then he shook his head. "The odds against that having any effect are astronomical." He said. "Unless you bled on my leg at some point."
In a low growl, Joker answered, "Which would have been very possible... I AM terrible for you."
Batman shrugged. "I've been dying before. I'm still here."
"And I'm dying right now, and I'm still here. But for how long?"
Intense blue eyes met his. "Neither of us is going to die."
"I am," Joker responded blandly. "And you know it." He swallowed hard and sank down onto the floor.
"You're stronger than that." Batman snapped. "Fight it."
"I can't." Joker didn't even think about his answer when he gave it. He sank into a well of self-hatred and bent over on the floor, holding his head in his hands.
"Damn it, Jack! Think about someone other than yourself here!" Batman shouted.
His thundering voice echoed out of the Batcave, and resonated into the ears of a peeping butler. Alfred had been listening in since they'd started talking.
"Don't SCREAM at me!" Joker snapped, his face contorted with anger. "I only think of you!"
"THEN YOU'LL. . ." Batman cleared his throat and started again, quietly. Controlled. "Then you'll stop talking about dying. I don't want you to die. I need that cycle to end."
Joker nodded quietly and reached up to rub the back of his neck, feeling it suddenly turn rigid. Right about then, he noticed all of his limbs felt awkward, suddenly - tense. "I need to know you love me."
Bruce blinked rapidly, clearing away the shadows that came over his view of the world when the Bat took control. He nodded slightly, and his eyes softened. "I don't know why you don't already know." He said. "But if you need to hear me say it. . . I do love you."
Joker nodded and smiled affectionately. "I did need to hear it. You have no idea how badly. I... won't talk about dying anymore, Bruce."
Bruce nodded. "It's kind of lonely over here." He hinted.
"Sorry," Joker muttered again. He climbed up to his feet and took a few steps toward the bed, but lost his footing suddenly and tripped over nothing, catching himself on the foot of the bed. "I think it's happening again." He squeezed his eyes closed and crawled up onto the covers.
"What's wrong? Are you dizzy?" Bruce asked, concern evident on his face.
"Yeah... and I feel heavy." Joker reached out for Bruce and grabbed onto his knee. Slowly, things changed... the throbbing in his head dulled and his body started to shift back toward being normal. "I'm okay, I think..."
Bruce pulled him up into a tight embrace. "It'll be okay." He said. "It'll be okay."
*