Fan Fiction ❯ The Sparrow's Burden ❯ Mandibore ( Chapter 6 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

The Sparrow’s Burden

6
Robin now ran behind the fastest guard, not taking the lead himself simply
because he didn’t know the way to conference room seven. The warden and several
guards ran behind him. The group turned a final corner and Robin followed the head
guard through an open door.

The medical teams and some security were already there. Robin took a moment
to notice the overturned table, the two lawyers huddled behind a shield of three guards,
and Sparrow. He was sitting straddled in a corner, his head moving slowly from side to
side, and his prison uniform stained red. Two paramedics attempted to work on him, but
he refused to let go of the object he had plunged into his ribcage. Robin squinted to see
what it was, and quickly noticed.

“Sparrow stabbed himself with a pen,” he confirmed out loud. Clearly Sparrow
was here to sign some kind of confession, which would explain the lawyers. On instinct,
Robin moved towards him, but was quickly stopped by nearby security.

His sense of urgency grew. Robin had to get to Sparrow. He had to find out what
he had done to Raven, what Raven had done to him. It was why he came all the way here
and why he didn’t sleep at all the previous night. Was Raven in danger? She was
certainly different, and when Sparrow died, any answers he carried would be gone too.

Robin began to try to force his way past. The two guards in his path held him by
the arms. Robin didn’t want to get his hands dirty, but he would do what he had to. Just
in time, though, Warden Bauer ordered the guards at ease, and they quickly complied.
Robin stepped between the two much taller men, and knelt beside the struggling
paramedics. Sparrow was fading, his breathing slow and shallow.

Upon seeing Robin, Sparrow let up on his grip of the pen, and the medics sprang
to work. He grunted as they tended to the wound. “Robin...” The dying boy whispered.
“For what it’s worth...”

“I know.” Robin yielded to his final apology. He felt ashamed at what he about
to ask next. “Listen man, about the girl you fought after me... “

“Raven.” Sparrow spat the name, as if it had not left his thoughts since that night.
“That’s no girl. I saw her Robin, I saw her mind.” His face went white. “It’s why I had
to do this. I couldn’t take knowing what she knew.”

Robin didn’t want this guy’s final moments to be anything but peaceful, but he
wasn’t making a lot of sense. “Sparrow, I don’t know what it is you’re trying to tell me.”

Sparrow was barely alive. His eyes were wandering around the room, they
tightened as though someone was holding a flashlight to his face. The sweat on his body
had dried up, and all remaining colour was drained from his complexion. “I have a lot...”
He tried to swallow, but there would have been no moisture left in his throat. “I have a
lot to make up for, man. Please, just be careful. You don’t know her like you think you
do. I don’t even think she knows.” He began waving a frail palm in front of him as
though he were reaching for something not far from his face. Robin, consumed with
sympathetic helplessness, retrieved Sparrow’s hand with his own. At the touch, Sparrow
struggled to unearth a final smile. “My family wasn’t your fault. I wasn’t your fault. I
know that now, I just hope...”

Sparrow’s words trailed off, and now his open eyes stared blankly past the walls
of the room. For a moment, Robin still held his hand. If any part of Sparrow was still
left, he wanted him to know that someone was there with him past the end. The room lay
still, the paramedics had stopped working and now readied a body bag.

It was not sorrow that Robin faced, it was not even grief. He was not sure if he
acted on any more than a respect for the dead when he gently laid Sparrow’s lifeless hand
by his side. Robin stood up to allow the medics to move into position and quietly turned
to leave. Not looking past his feet, he felt the watch of every person in the room on him.

“Robin,” the somewhat confused Warden Bauer said as he passed. “Was he a
friend of yours?”

Robin didn’t stop walking. His unfeeling stare remained to the floor as he
responded. “No,” he passed through the doorway and towards the exit. Quietly to
himself, Robin conceded; “but he could’ve been.”

*

All Raven could seem to do was back away slowly as the reptile advanced on her.
All of it’s extra arms wound back, ready to impale.

Her knees felt like they were encased in concrete. Whatever happened that night
with Robin and Sparrow, now it was affecting more than just her inhibitions, she had lost
most of her telekinetic power. In the course of the battle, Raven attempted to summon
large, solid objects to hurl at her foe. Through a very sobering few minutes, she found
that the most she could hit this thing with were objects of no more than ten pounds or so.
Raven may as well have challenged it to a pillow fight.

Now, suddenly her flight was gone. There was no escape from the top of the
building on which Raven now faced an infinitely superior opponent. She had seen what it
had done to Beast Boy and Cyborg, and knew the boys were out of the fight. For the first
time, Raven was trembling.

Gathering every ounce of composure, Raven met eyes with the demon. She
silenced the voices in her head telling her to run, cry, or pray. If this thing was going to
end her, then she was going to make sure it ended her way. She forced her hands to stop
shaking, her legs braced themselves against the roof.

First came a brick from where Cyborg went through the wall. The monster was
ready, the brick was knocked aside before it could complete the path to it’s head. Raven
focused on several pieces of glass from another collision next and fired. Again, it
expectedly failed. Then another object, and another miss. Raven’s direction quivered as
she saw that the beast actually seemed to be amused at her last stand. He could have
closed his advance on her and finished it, but instead he seemed to wait for her next shot.
And they came, and they went.

Raven, who laughed at the idea of surrender, thought the fiasco would continue as
long as the beast kept her alive. She was proven wrong when a blurred purple streak
crashed into the back of the creature, creating a billowing cloud of dust and asphalt as it’s
massive body was driven into the roof of the apartment.

When the dust settled, she saw that the creature had not even lost it’s footing.
Raven’s hopelessness and small surprise grew to unequalled affliction as she watched
Starfire rise into view. Her fists pulsing with power, her eyes zealously green; the poise
was of a stirring warrior. Raven could not help but feel in awe of the majesty and
courage of the girl.

But, courage and vigor were not enough. The monster forgot about Raven and did
not hesitate to give everything he had to the more potent of the girls. With little effort,
Starfire was immobilised. The forceful tentacles wrapped around her body and lifted her
high into the air.

The panic in Starfire’s eyes mirrored Raven’s. She could not lose Stafire, not
now. Every fiber of Raven’s soul cried for Starfire to be put down gently and for the
lizard to turn his attention back to her again.

Desperation drove out fear and Raven lunged forward, grabbing the creature
around it’s massive waist and hitting it with every melee attack Robin had taught her.
Into her punches and kicks she drove her hopelessness, her fury, and her desire. Even
with all this, she did little more than catch the monster’s attention. As though swatting a
bothersome insect, Raven was sent soaring off the building.

She did not remember what happened next, only that her last waking thoughts
occurred as she landed in an open dumpster. Raven had lost all will to move. As she
drifted into unconsciousness, she grieved for the one she let down. “Starfire, I’m so
sorry...”

*

Raven awoke on the levitated stone that was all too familiar to her. She was
standing and her mind was clear. The knowledge of what was happening in the physical
world strayed from her thoughts. Raven was not sure why she had come, only that she
did not want to remember.

There was something different about where she was. It was the same rock she set
foot upon when she meditated, but different. It was different everywhere, albeit remotely,
something had changed in the atmosphere. What it was, Raven could not put her finger
on it, but it was an improvement, no question.

She did not know why she was here. She had not meditated nor had she used her
“portal mirror”. But what other way was there to get here? Possibly a dream, Raven may
well have been asleep in her bed. She dreamt of such things on occasion.

“Hello Raven.” The voice from behind caused her spine to jolt upwards. The
words were not familiar, but Raven knew the speaker was. She spun her body around
into a defensive position and stared Sparrow straight in the eye.

“How did you get here?” She asked only so she would know what entrance to
seal before blowing him away.

Sparrow did not retort in kind. He spoke softly, almost with empathy. “I’ve been
here ever since the fight with Robin. I guess when I read you, something of me got left
behind.” He began to pace, his sight wandered around the void. “It’s really not so bad in
here, just have to know what to admire.”

Raven saw no challenge in his face, no tension in his poise. For whatever reason
he stood before her, combat was not one of them. She lowered her guard. “Is this a
dream?”

Sparrow chuckled. “You could call it that. I wouldn’t.” He stopped his roaming
and focused on her. His demeanour fell to one of grave circumstances. “Raven, don’t
panic. Think to what happened before you came here.”

Raven’s puzzlement only lasted a moment. Then Raven covered her ears as
everything rushed back. The battle, the loss of her powers, and Starfire.

“Starfire!” She was dying as they spoke. Raven’s skin went cold, her arms
immediately broke out in a drenching sweat. “I have to--”

“No you don’t.” Sparrow cut her off. Against every instinct in her body, Raven
allowed the words to calm her. Some unknown force was putting her trust in him. This
was not the same boy she duelled with atop the church. He had some kind of dominion
here, and if wanted to hurt her, he would have done it already. “The state you’re in right
now is a little different than your meditation state. Time has no meaning here, it doesn’t
pass. We have matters to deal with.”

Raven had sedated her urge to wake up. She knew he spoke the truth. “Matters?”
she scoffed. “Like how to save Starfire?”

“Like why you couldn’t save Starfire.” Sparrow’s words struck a nerve. He had
answers, all the answers she sought over the last few days. It was because he had
something to do with it.

Anger rumbled within Raven. “You did this to me.”

“Yep,” he quipped. He looked to see her reaction, her face was not one of
forgiveness. “Not on purpose. Your powers are drawn from your inner struggles, right?
The tension you bear, the misery and anger you suppress are channelled to give you some
impressive abilities.” He rubbed the side of the jaw where his tooth had been knocked
free. “...Very impressive.”

Raven nodded, knowing full well the capabilities of her demonic body, but
confused how Sparrow knew so much. He continued. “I forced you to share those
burdens with me. When you share something so profound with someone, even by force,
it becomes lighter, easier to carry.”

“...But it sapped my power,” she finished. Sparrow could not be trusted, but
things made sense. Raven’s telekinesis had always been drawn from well-balanced
passions. By confining them to herself and never allowing one feeling to dominate
another, she could control and release them at her bidding. But like all people, Raven’s
emotions became particularly stout because she could never share them with anyone,
which contributed to the scope of the power.

She did not need him to explain the rest. When Sparrow experienced all of
Raven’s inner demons, he took a lot of the load off. Raven had less to hide and less to
lose by releasing feelings. Her behaviour the last while suddenly became clear to her. It
was as though she was thinking and feeling for the first time.

But as her world opened up to her, the lack of mounting inner chaos would have
to be seen sooner or later, and it was just dumb luck that Raven’s sorcery abandoned her
during the battle with the lizard monster.

Knowing all this, Raven was far from having closure. There were countless
questions to be asked. “Why are you doing this, Sparrow? Last time I saw you, we were
trying to kill each other.” Sparrow turned his back at her question. Her slowly wandered
to the edge of the platform, not answering for several seconds.

“You have a decision to make,” he announced. “Whenever it’s made and you
wake up, I’ll be gone.” There was a pause, “I’m dying, Raven.”

Raven froze. She did not know what to say to him. Despite all that he was
currently doing for her, she still viewed him as an enemy. But compassion was all she
now felt. Sparrow knew his physical self would soon be no more, and he must have been
terrified.

He turned to her, briskly approached and laid his hands on her unwavering
shoulders. “I told Robin moments ago I have stuff to make up for. So you need to decide
what it is you want me to do.”

Raven’s stare had not faltered from Sparrow’s eyes. There was a sense of duty in
them, almost of urgency. Whatever followed would be his utmost effort to aid her.
“When I go, I can give back all that I’ve taken from you. Your feelings will once again
be your own, and you’ll have to bury them again.” Raven instinctively rejected the
thought, she could not go back to what she had once been, not after the things she had
seen and felt. It was too much, he may as well have asked her to give her life. “Or,” he
continued, noticing the repulsion in Raven’s reaction. “I can take them with me.”

An impulse filled Raven to answer immediately, but she repressed it. Her
telekinesis would inevitably fade into memory without mental turmoil to fuel it. She
would no longer be able to be a Teen Titan, which was a thought that did not cause Raven
absolute grief. She could have a life. She made no defence that she was tired of fighting
all the time.

But she had a responsibility. She had the ability to protect those who needed it. It
would not be right to throw that away, regardless of her personal desires.

Raven could not answer right away, not before another question of hers was at
ease. This one had burned her since last night, and it had to be cleared before she could
decide. “What about Starfire?” The words choked her, they almost seemed to try to force
their way back down her throat. She was not ready to know what she was asking.

Sparrow smiled, seeming to anticipate the question. “Oh,” he looked past
Raven’s shoulder. “I think you should talk to her about that.”

Following the path of his sight, Raven turned to see the girl in platinum floating
onto the rock She landed softly beside her master and began to speak right away. “You
are aware of who I am.”

Raven could not look at her, for she knew exactly who the emotion was. The
answer had confused and scared her, and until now, she had pushed it aside. Although
she knew it could be nothing else, she could not deal with the truths she bared. Raven did
not know how. “You are . . . my feelings for Starfire.”

The emotion spoke pleasantly and without prudence. “You love her, Raven.”

Raven felt her chest tighten as tears gathered to her eyes. Even now, she was
clawing through a barrier and, finally, was about to break through. She just had to stop
fighting. “I’ve never loved anyone,” sobs forced their way through the words. “I don’t
know what it feels like, but I know I love her.”

Raven could not remain standing. A great sense of release filled her body and she
fell to her knees. She continued to cry, and for a long time, neither Sparrow or the girl
approached. Raven did not know what could be said to quiet her. The tears were not of
sorrow nor of joy, they were of trauma. She was reacting to her first knowing of the most
powerful emotion capable, and Raven crumbled at it’s presence within her.

When Raven was able to contain her weeping, Love knelt before her, reaching to
her face and gently wiping away the lingering tears. “I am not sure what will happen to
your feelings for Starfire if you decide to regain your burdens,” she hushed. “They may
fade or they may become something else you will have to repress.”

Raven knew repressing something like this would destroy her. Her other
emotions were hard, but this would be impossible. But she could not bear it to fade,
either. For love to be gone would be for her world to disappear. Raven would become a
soulless corpse.

“So when I wake up, Starfire will still be in the arms of that monster?”

Sparrow nodded. “Like I said, you’ll be back the moment you left. Not a moment
will have passed.”

The answer forced Raven into a decision. It was one that pained her more than
anything she ever known was possible, but Starfire was everything to her. She was ready
to sacrifice all things for her love.

Once more before awaking, Raven spoke; “Sparrow, I’ve made up my mind...”