Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge. ❯ Mayhem. ( Chapter 6 )

For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge.

~ A Kitty and Eoko Fanfiction.

 

Warnings: Swearing! (In case you hadn't noticed that by now.) And boy/boy relations (In case you hadn't worked that out by now.)

 

Disclaimer: Eoko and I do not own the FF8 characters. T_T Such a sad, sad thing. We don't even make any money off of this. Woe.

 

Author's Notes:

 

Kitty: I am highly amused that "Mayhem" is actually listed as a charge on the website I'm using to pick the names for the chapter. Granted, it actually refers to causing injury on purpose, which has nothing to do with this chapter at all, but the whole chapter is filled with mayhem anyway. Who knew Mayhem was a felony?

 

Eoko: As that is probably not a Canadian or Australian site- well at least not Canadian, I will ignore that classification as a criminal act. Also, yay for chapter.

 

Kitty: I think it's American, since there's no country add-on thingy after the URL. But it was the only one I could find with more than about five charges on it. -_-

 

Eoko: I think you're right, since it uses felony.

 

Kitty: Probably. Nevermind though, eh? I don't even know how long since we last uploaded. I am very slack and forgetful.

 

Eoko: Yeah... worse than me. *grins*

 

Kitty: Shut up.

 

Eoko: You shut up, and update.

 

Kitty: I'm going to. That's why we're doing these Author Notes.

 

Eoko: *looks at them* I think that's good. ^^

 

Kitty: Kay~ *prances off*

 

Chapter 6 - Mayhem.

 

Zell had stayed with Javier for the remainder of the noon lock up, not that there was much time left to spend idly after discussing matters with the Elites, sucking off Seifer and then taking the boy that was presently resting next to him. Still, it was a pleasant way to pass the time until the cell doors opened again.

 

He and his boy had gotten dressed again after they'd caught their breath, and now awaited the opportunity to go to dinner. When the doors opened Zell shooed the raven haired boy out and off to his meal.

 

The tattooed man headed over to Seifer's cell to make sure he and Irvine were both in fact alive. He was fairly certain that his impromptu blow job had effectively calmed the mob boss, but he wasn't sure exactly how long that calm would last.

 

He smirked when he got to Seifer's cell, the occupants already moving to go to dinner. “Glad to see you both survived.”

 

“Like he could do anything to me, Ink. Fuck, you crazy?” Seifer said, motioning with his hand and chuckling.

 

Zell glanced over at the hitman and cocked a brow. “I'm sure he's got something up his sleeve, or down that hidden pocket he's somehow managed.” He smiled pleasantly as sky blue eyes glared menacingly at him.

 

“You're starting to look pretty beat up, Paris,” he commented offhandedly, joining Seifer as he left his cell and headed toward the mess hall.

 

Irvine glared harder and followed behind the two. “Funny that. Here I thought beatings were, like, good for the complexion.”

 

“I see your `good humor' is still intact,” the taller blond said, nudging the shorter in the arm and snickering.

 

- - -

 

The rest of the evening was uneventful, even for the displeased cell mates. Irvine had actually managed to go several hours without being hit. He was finding that it was much more enjoyable to not get hit. Now, if only he could fuel that fire in his green eyed cell mate and avoid having his own go black.

 

When the bell for night lock up sounded everyone made their way back to their little box homes and began to settle down for the night. Zell rested his arms on the reinforcing bar of his cell, hands dangling out into the hall.

 

“Is it Tuesday, or Wednesday?” the blond asked, face turned to the left and towards Seifer and Irvine's cell. They were only two down.

 

“Wednesday, why?” Seifer asked, taking up a similar position at his own cell, face turned right.

 

“We'll have to do introductions then.” He chuckled and ran his fingers through his hair.

 

“Introductions for wh- oh… right. I forgot they were in tonight. Well, better to shock him all at the beginning.”

 

“Shock who, bout what, when, and what the fuck?” Irvine's voice floated down to Zell's ears, though not nearly so clear as Seifer. The guard suspected he was further back in the cell, maybe brushing that silky looking hair…

 

“Just a couple guards…” Zell replied, trying to decide if that was the best word to describe them.

 

“Oh joy. Couple more arseholes like Captian Hardarse? Are you goin' to tell me to, like, suck up to them and be a good little prison boy scout?”

 

Seifer nearly choked, and then proceeded to almost have a head on collision with the bars of his cell. “Oh hell. No. They aren't like the captain. Not at all. They're worse.”

 

“Scary as all hell. Even I'm terrified. Rikan!” Zell called to his right. “You know who I'm talking bout, right?”

 

“Fuck yea,” the voice of the robber joined the conversation. “Terrifying… those two. Man, when they're together, better to play dead.”

 

“Or you could just do that twenty-four seven and make all our lives more enjoyable, twit,” Seifer added, then resolved he'd say nothing more to the spiky haired man that evening.

 

“Don't worry, Lock,” Zell purred. “Some of us like you well enough.”

 

“Whore!” Seifer accused as his face twisted into a look of anger. Rikan didn't deserve Zell's attention. Not when he was joking and especially not on the rare occasion he got it. The thief wasn't even recognized as being in existence to Prof, he wasn't anywhere near the top of the heap, and frankly only managed to stay relatively safe because he was too annoying to deal with or rape.

 

“Gah!” Seifer exclaimed. “Get off me!”

 

Zell moved to the farthest right of his cell and pressed his face against the bars to catch a glimpse of the two guards of the hour, each with their middle finger and thumb pinching one of the taller blond's own fingers.

 

He pulled his hand back and inspected it as if worried he been infected by something astronomically dangerous and most likely deadly.

 

The shortest of the two guards, and actually shorter than Zell, giggled merrily and swatted the taller in the arm. “Helloooo, Seifer.” She beamed at him and he took a step back.

 

“Where's the fish?” the taller woman with bleach blond hair asked, pushing her cap up with her night stick and peering into the cell.

 

“Yeah!” the brunette beside her just short of cheered. “Heard he's a bit of a looker.”

 

“A bit?” the silky, accented voice of Irvine Kinneas inquired, stepping to the side, and thus out from where Seifer's mass had been obscuring him.

 

“He's a cowboy!” the shorter girl said gleefully. “Say `Hyowday, pardner'!” she commanded, going so far as to point at him.

 

“Fuck no,” Irvine replied, staring openly at the little brunette. He turned his head to the taller woman when he heard a low, approving whistle escape her lips.

 

“How is he?” she asked, eyes moving from the long haired inmate to the blond. “Looks like a screamer to me.”

 

“Eoko!” the spunky woman said, giggling and swatting the arm of her friend once again.

 

“He wouldn't know,” Irvine said dryly, climbing up onto his bunk, and began attempting to ignore the obviously crazy women posing as correctional officers.

 

“That so?” the woman, now known as Eoko, asked. She let her night stick fall into her open palm before wrapping her fingers around it and moving them `absently' up and down the metal shaft. “Haven't fucked that sweet arse yet, Almasy?”

 

“How would you know?!” Irvine cried, glaring over the side of his bunk.

 

“I'm biding my time,” Seifer ground out between clenched teeth. He and the guards ignored Irvine this time. The brunette because she had fallen into another one of her giggle-fests and no one could say when she'd finish.

 

“Stop molesting your poor baton!” Zell cried, nearly dying of laughter, clutching the bars of his cell for dear life.

 

“Fufufino likes when I molest him, thank ya very much, Mr. Dincht!”

 

“Zelly!” the shorter woman cried and skipped, yes skipped, over to his cell and knocked him very lightly against the forehead with her own baton.

 

“My name is Ink, Kitty.”

 

“No s'not,” she sang and giggled again.

 

“Oh my fucking gods! What are you on, and does she ever stop?!” Irvine exploded, leaning over the edge of the bunk and glaring so hard at Eoko she even so much as raised a brow. Seifer got ready to catch him should he over balance.

 

“There's a reason they're called `Perv and Giggles',” he said, shaking his head.

 

“Let me guess who's who…. Fucking lunatics…”

 

“We like to think so,” the bleach blond said, smile spread wide across her face. “Well, I better save Ink from Giggles…” she trailed off as her attention turned towards the brunette.

 

“Stop. Poking. Me. With. Your. Baton!” Zell said, getting only a single word out between pokes.

 

“Sephiroth commands you to step away from the cell bars, Mr. Dincht!” she grinned, then giggled when her comrade began humming the villain's theme song.

 

“Fuck me, you should have called them Beavis and Butthead!” The hitman threw himself face first into his pillow and proceeded to whimper.

 

“Wouldn't account for their infatuation with watching us fuck,” Seifer said, leaving Zell and the girls to themselves and moving over to Irvine's bunk. He lifted a hand and brought it to the auburn haired man's shoulder, rubbing there. “Scared the shit out of me too. Don't know how they ever got hired.”

 

“They… watch…?” Irvine asked, completely oblivious to everything else said and done after that statement.

 

“Mhmm, and just short of eating popcorn while doing so, too. I think they said they were `fangirls' or something.”

 

“And fangirls just go around watching gay sex to get their rocks off??” Sky blue eyes clearly showed the distress and shock evident in his voice.

 

“Their kind do. Hold on.” He turned his head back toward the bars. “Perv! What do you call watching us, the smartsy one?”

 

“Entertainment for the heterosexually uninterested?” she asked, voice lifting enough to easily carry back to him. “Or anal confections?”

 

“Not the second one!” Zell screamed and made a motion to attempt to smack the perverted woman. “I told you to never utter that phrase again!”

 

Irvine wrentched his head around and stared in absolute horror in the direction the voice had floated. “Does she have no shame?!”

 

“None to speak of. Miss Lens wants to study them.”

 

“I ain't never getting fucked with them around!” he cried and returned to whimpering into his pillow. “I'd rather shove seven or eight inches of Alastar down my throat and be done with it!”

 

One of Seifer's golden brows rose into a lovely arch. “Who's Alastar?” he asked, voice deep and dangerously quiet.

 

“My gun,” Irvine sneered. “My rifle. And in case I say the same but with Exeter, she's my shotgun.”

 

“You name all the `guns' you're so intimate with?” the green eyed man asked, lips spreading into a devilish smirk. “Should I tell you what to call mine, or will you grace it with a name all your own?” (1)

 

“Like fuck your little pin-dick is getting anywhere close enough to be intimate! Fuck the hell off, and get off me!” Irvine lashed out with his hand to dislodge Seifer's on his shoulder, only to get that grabbed up instead.

 

The blond gave a vicious pull, arm already bent at an awkward angle and forcing the hitman to arch and twist more in order to limit the pain shooting up to his brain. Seifer brought his lips to the slender man's ear and nipped once, then spoke. “You ran outta luck a long time ago, what you're running on now, I got no clue, but eventually it'll run out too. And if you keep this shit up, you better get used to calling my gun your worst nightmare.”

 

With that he threw the assassin roughly back down onto his mattress and stalked off to the sink to clean up for bed.

 

Kitty and Eoko stepped back in front of Seifer's cell. He could see them look at each other, then disapprovingly at him. They encouraged the openly gay and bisexual inmates to form healthy, safe relationships, not rape whoever they wanted. He lifted his middle finger over his shoulder at them and went back to brushing his teeth.

 

The brunette sighed and reached into the pouch at her side. The taller woman reached into her pocket. Each withdrew one item and moved to the side of the cell nearest the bunks. They reached in and lofted both items up onto Irvine's bunk before continuing on their rounds.

 

Irvine cocked a brow and slowly lifted himself from the position he had been thrown. He curled up his knees and leaned up, looking down at the foot of his bunk where the two `gifts' sat. He reached out and picked them up, looking at them closely. One was a tube of face and hand lotion with aloe vera, the other was medicated lip chap. His brow arched again, higher and he looked out past the bars of his cell.

 

“What'd you get?” Seifer asked, laying down in his bed.

 

The hitman blinked and tucked the items into his pillowcase. “Lotion with aloe and lip chap.”

 

“Guess they heard you were getting roughed up.”

 

“They give everyone gifts?”

 

“Only those they expect to watch. Guess you set off their gaydar.”

 

“They're women!” he protested.

 

“Bisexual women to be precise. They have it too.” Seifer grinned to himself at that. Not that his own senses weren't telling him that Irvine would in fact enjoy being with him. But it was nice to have the outside perspective on his side as well.

 

Irvine groaned loudly at the exact same time the lights went out and he fell once again with his face buried in his pillow. “I hate it here…” he murmured.

 

- - - - - - -

 

(1) Gold. Pure gold. This is one of my favourite lines in this fic, and that's saying a lot since I think there are a lot of good lines that came from us both. But this is just made of epic win. ILU, Ko-Ko~