Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ Misunderstood ❯ In the Name of Science ( Chapter 2 )

Lucrecia's POV

 

Episode 2: In the Name of Science

 

At one point, I may have loved him.

 

I'm sure there was a time when all that mattered was being with him. After all, even thirty years later, he was still on my mind. When he came here, angry with the papers, the proof of my betrayal, I could scarce speak. I wanted him to be here to stay with me, I was so lonely. And my guilt and sorrow was so heavy, I wanted to share the burden with someone who would care, someone who had loved me as well.

 

But that was not why he came.

 

He was always so sweet, dear Valentine. So tender, every touch or caress determined to show me how much he cared. He whispered soft words into my ears as he took me gently. To him, it was all about me. My pleasure came first, my smile.

 

He never even knew it was all a ploy, so well did I play my role.

 

Still he fought for me, died for me, tried to protect me and my unborn child. He didn't know whether Sephiroth was his or Hojo's, but that didn't matter to him. In his eyes, the life in my womb was an innocent, no matter its genetics, and didn't deserve what was done. He had such a strong heart and mind, loyal and steadfast. He thought with his heart, though his friends oft thought him cold and unfeeling. I remember Raven once commenting on his partner being about as conversational as a wall.

 

He was a Turk; yes, and what a fine Turk he made. I would almost swear they made those dark blue uniforms just to fit a man of his stature, he wore it so well. He was good at his job, seemingly detached when he needed to be and a brilliant thinker at that. Always quick to act when the need arose. He was an excellent marksman… I suppose all these qualities were what made him do so well as Commander.

 

I don't know why the President gave him and his partner to us. I oft wondered what it was he had done to piss off Mr. ShinRa himself…

 

Thirty years… it was a long time ago… those events that irretrievably changed the lives of the world. Even now, when I think about it and remember, I still find it hard to believe that I was led so easily. I still want to believe that it was all for the good of the future. The Jenova Project was supposed to be a brilliant divesture into an unknown science, a new frontier for those bored of conventional studies.

Imagine! The Promised Land! A place of wonder and intrigue, filled to the brim with power and energy, enough to make everyone happy for the rest of their lives. Jenova, the Ancient, as such was too big to pass up. I would have been an idiot to stand in the way of that science, and I was no fool. True, it required sacrifices… but for the good of mankind, I would do anything.

 

Even seduce a man so that he would become pliable.

 

I won't forget the day we first met. It was long before that day in Nibelheim, back in the ShinRa building when I started to work for my dear Hojo in the beginning. I was nothing but a young, impressionable assistant when I became lost, trying to find Hojo's laboratory. I was wandering around the many floors of the ShinRa building, looking every bit the weak and lost female. I suppose he thought he was coming to my rescue; the second time I nearly fell to the ground after someone rudely pushed me out of the way.

 

He had the most extraordinary grey eyes, I remember. Granite and strong, like storm clouds of a fiery nature with so much passion and intensity behind them. They were eyes I could have fallen in love with, had I not then met the man who would be my husband.

 

Valentine was quiet as he asked me if I needed help that day. He glared at the man that had pushed me and offered out an arm like the gentlemen he proved himself to be. I could only blush and take his arm as I directed him towards the science department. I had made up my mind to get to know this man… until the moment I walked through the door and met the wonder, who was to be my superior as we studied with Professor Gast. He took my breath away.

 

Hojo had grey eyes, as well, a startling paradox, I realize. But his eyes were a dark grey, so dark they were nearly black. They drew me in like a black hole on the horizon, pulling me so close that I dare not escape. I didn't want to, I was hopelessly ensnared and forever his. He eclipsed Vincent… everything about him was inherently more powerful.

 

After that, Vincent never had a chance.

 

But I see now, perhaps my fascination with Hojo was a bit unhealthy. My love for him was too strong, causing me to make foolish mistakes. In the end, for Hojo, it was about the child. I died alone, with my sorrows and pain as I listened to the frightened and pained cries of a son I never even got to hold. I was merely a tool, just as dear Valentine was.

 

And, yet, I still love that scientist to this day. The ways he made me feel could not be compared. Both the pleasure and the pain… he used me.

 

Here I am alone now, by myself in this cave I had set up to house my seemingly immortal soul and body. I can't die that easily, and I am far too squeamish to take my own hand to end my torment. My son… was dead as Vincent told me. My dear sweet Sephiroth with his beautiful grey eyes when he was born. Grey that then became clouded with the green of the mako. My husband was dead and gone, destroyed by the man who had harbored hatred for him. And abandoned, turned away by the one man I thought would never want to leave my side. I suppose, even in the end, he understood the truth.

 

Vincent was the only one who truly cared, and I trampled his feelings, using them against him.

 

That was my purpose. That was the task that Hojo had set forth for me. He saw the way that Vincent looked at me… I saw the way that he watched me. He was starving for affection, as if he had never really known love… It was easy.

 

A shy smile, a look from beneath curled lashes, casual gentle touches with my hands when he wasn't prepared, and he melted to my charms. It wasn't long before he found his way to my bed, where I entrapped him within my own web of deceit and seduction. The web so tight and encasing that even I was not sure who the father of my child was.

 

I would seduce Valentine by day but return to the arms of my Hojo every night. Each time, my scientist would claim me, as well, as if to mark me as his own, something that was already well ingrained into my head, no matter what he asked me to do. Some might say that would make me a slut or other unrefined slurs.

 

But they don't understand. It was all in the name of science. For the glory of science, I would sell my soul, and, in a sense, some might argue that I did.

 

Valentine was necessary for the experiments we planned to run. We needed an able body and a sound mind, and he was the perfect choice. He had already been trained in the ways of war and tactics. All he needed were some physical augmentations.

 

I don't know what changed in my husband. Perhaps he had always been that sadistic, something I hadn't noticed. But it became more than science for him, more than the truth and the results.

 

I would lay upstairs, completely bedridden and weak thanks to the child that was nearly due and the mako and Jenova that had been pumped into me, and listen to his cackling laughter as he worked his tests on the Turk. I knew what he was doing, and I was powerless to stop.

 

And the pain, gods the pain! Giving birth was something I would never wish to do again! It felt as if he were tearing the literal life out of me as he came into this world. I lay back on blood-soaked sheets and held out my arms to hold my son, but Hojo stormed in, grabbed up the grey-eyed child, and left the room, sparing me naught a glance and breaking my heart all in the same instance.

 

My world shattered. I wanted my son… I wanted my husband back. But I was ignored and left to die. Useless, no longer of any worth, that was what he had muttered as he left the room, eyes glinting in a way that reminded me of a time he had found a new test subject. And he had… in our Sephiroth.

 

Vincent… he doesn't know. With any luck he won't remember. Perhaps he might still love me somewhere in there, maybe I can still know the feeling of being loved. But if he knew…. if he ever found out what I had done, in the dark hours of the night or the dim hours of the morning, my efforts to reclaim a husband lost to sanity… he might never forgive.

 

Because you see… I was the perfect wife. Stood by my husband's side through everything… no matter what he said or did… I even helped him.

 

I had to, you see, I had to prove I was no longer useless, that I could still entertain him, that we were alike. And I must admit, the science intrigued me. How much pain could the human body withstand? If this much mako were absorbed, how would it react? What would the Jenova cells do when combated with this? And the demons, how would they merge with his body? It was all so fascinating.

But the arm… and the gauntlet… those were my idea. That's why I said, he could never find out. He doesn't know what I did….

 

The things I was injected with, like him, I will live for the Planet only knows how long, maybe forever. Perhaps that will be my punishment, to live alone without my child, my husband, or the man that had loved me.

 

The man that I had hurt, deceived, and desired… all in the name of love… and science.

 

* * *

So, anyone still hate Lucrecia? Or are we feeling sorry for her now?