Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ My Happy Ending ❯ Broken Cid ( Chapter 18 )

Chapter 18: Broken Cid

“And it's been awhile

Since I can say that I wasn't addicted
And it's been awhile
Since I can say I love myself as well
And it's been awhile
Since I've gone and fucked things up just like I always do
And it's been awhile
But all that shit seems to disappear when I'm with you.”

-Staind “It's Been Awhile”

Cid yawned and stretched as he meandered his way up to the hangar, still quite tired, even after having drank two warm cups of tea and carrying a thermos with the hot liquid in it to keep him warm. It was still rather early outside, and the frosty grass crunched beneath his feet, the chill mists that rose clinging to his ankles, as he strode toward the building that housed the Bronco. The biting air made him shiver, even though he was already wearing a grey thermal undershirt beneath his tee shirt and jacket, which he eventually found in his clean laundry.

Despite the weather, Cid did his best to ignore the cold and concentrate more on whatever it was that had gotten itself lodged within the Tiny Bronco. Cid soon found that the hangar was warmer than outside but still had a nippy tinge to the air. He turned on a small heater he brought from his house and set it up, soon falling into a routine of work.

Noon came with Cid bent over the nose of the Tiny Bronco, his sleeves rolled up past his elbows, swearing loudly so that his voice both muffled and echoed all at once, his head half-hidden within the innards of his airplane. Under one wing, Captain whuffed his agreement every now and then when Cid's explicatives reached new levels of creativity.

This was the condition that Raye found him in when she drove up in her father's truck, loaded with various scrap metal, another order of parts, and a bundle of recipe cards in the passenger seat.

“Cid!” the redhead called rather awkwardly. His name always escaped her mouth as though she could hardly stand to say it. It made her feel embarrassed for some reason, and she stood a reasonable distance from where Cid was working. He was still bent into the inner workings of the plane, most of his head and shoulders hidden from view. The pilot had shed his jacket and tossed it onto the floor where Captain promptly found the garment and curled up in the warmth of its folds.

She noticed the rolled up sleeves, despite the cold, and his sweating. His shirt bunched up a little around his waist, exposing a small strip of skin on his lower back. Faded and slightly too tight, the thin material clung to his broad shoulders, showing every distinct surface of bone and muscle underneath.

Raye pulled her eyes away, more like dragged them, and fixated instead on the way the feet of the ladder he was on wobbled dangerously every now and again.

“Cid!” she repeated, this time a little more clearly.

This time his muffled cursing paused.

“Oh, hi!”

Cid's voice floated out to her as though it were the Tiny Bronco itself speaking to her and not its owner. “Gimme a sec, okay? This bitch is getting damned pushy!”

He jerked again, on whatever component was giving him a hard time for emphasis. The pilot gave an aggravated growl, repositioning himself so his right arm up, braced against the sturdy framework, and his left arm still somewhere deep within. Bracing himself, Cid gave a final yank, and there was a loud clunk followed by a muffled thud, a loud crack, and a yelp of pain from Cid.

“Augh! Fuck!”

Lighting quick, he reached in with his free hand to pull something away. It fell with crash to the floor and shattered, and Cid pulled his arm up. The redhead watched as Cid straightened up, face ashen. Raye frowned worriedly.

“Cid, get down from there before you fall!” she yelled.

The man nodded mutely, hopping down nimbly, except for how he stumbled as he landed. He held his left arm clutched to his chest, and as he looked up at Raye to try to offer her a smile, his eyes glazing over rapidly.

“…Cid?”

He took a few steps toward her, staggering a little.

“'M feelin' a little bit woozy…” he managed to mumble, voice dropping hollowly and his speech slurring just slightly.

A concerned look crossed her features.

“Cid, sit down,” she told him worriedly. He was beginning to sway as though he might pass out.

Cid obeyed, flopping right down on his backside where he stood. He came down like a sack of bricks, emitting a low gasp of pain, his grip on his arm tightening before he finally went limp and sank to the floor, eyes visibly rolling back into his head before he passed out completely.

Raye gasped.

“Cid!” she yelled, closing the distance between them and skidding to kneel at his side.

Carefully she rolled him onto his back and felt his face. He was clammy and coated in a cold sweat that made her cringe. His lips had a bluish tinge to them, and the girl let out a sympathetic sound, moving carefully to remove his left arm from where he still protectively held it to his chest.

The first thing Raye noticed was the shattered face of Cid's watch. He was even bleeding slightly from where a few shards of the glass face cut his arm, which was quickly swelling up on both sides of the leather band. Raye carefully removed the object from his wrist, hoping to get some blood flow back into his bluing fingers.

Once the watch was off, Raye could truly see the disfiguration of his wrist, clearly broken in at least one place and maybe fractured in another. Raye heaved a slight sigh, a little uncomfortable at the sight. After carefully placing Cid's hand down on the pavement of the hangar, she pulled out her phone and called a doctor.

In a town full of engineers and mechanics, injuries such as in Cid's case was inevitable, so it was with skillful ease that the doctor reset the break, bandaged Cid's arm, and built the cast on the spot. The blond lay unconscious the whole time, which, the physician told Raye, was a good thing. The woman agreed. After having been through several breaks herself, Raye knew how excruciating resetting a break could be.

Once the doctor left, Raye sat on the cold hard floor of the hangar and waited for Cid to come around so she could get him to his house. She covered him with his jacket, and rested his head in the lap of her crossed legs. Beside her, Captain sat faithfully as well, and together they waited in silence. The girl sighed as she played with a scrap of aluminum shaving she'd found, currently wrapping it around a bit of wire in some kind of deformed piece of abstract art.

When Cid finally came around not too long after, it was with a slight gasp and a muffled curse.

“Fucking ow…,” he said plainly, cracking his eyes open slightly enough to peer up at Raye. He shivered. The floor was cold, even with his jacket covering him, and Cid struggled to keep his teeth from chattering.

“You broke it,” Raye stated, giving the pilot a stern look.

“The part?” he asked dumbly. He was still a little separated from reality and had not yet made the connection that the pain he was feeling was an injury. Raye offered an irritated snort.

“No, dumbass, your arm!” she said sharply.

He sat up suddenly. “Come again?”

“You broke your arm,” Raye repeated.

“WHAT?!” he yelled. “Ahh, FUCK!”

Gasping, Cid sagged back to the floor quickly, feeling rather ill. His arm was throbbing from his fingertips well into his shoulder.

“Fuck…ow!” he whimpered. “Fuuuck…”

He hoped he wouldn't puke. His ears were ringing and his heart was pounding away. He struggled for breath, sweating uncomfortably, and he turned his head to look up pathetically at Raye.

“It hurts,” he cracked.

Raye wasn't sure if she felt comfortable hearing his voice so docile.

“It's your own fault,” she said trying her best to sound genuinely unconcerned.

Cid sighed, finally noting his cast. “The doc, came?”

“Yeah. You were out a long time.”

“How long…until it heals…?” Cid asked, unsure if he wanted to hear the news.

Raye chewed her bottom lip and hesitated a moment.

“The doctor told me you have to stay out of that cowling for two months,” she finally said.

Cid's eyes changed instantly, glassing over and crinkling. If Raye had only seen his expression and not known the situation, she would have sworn he'd just been slapped.

“Shit.”

Cid felt like he could just scream any moment. Or cry. Or even both.

“You fucking moron, you,” he muttered bitterly to himself. “You were in such a fucking hurry to get yer old ass back up in the air that you rushed like some snot-nosed novice fresh outta flight school and went and fucked yourself up even more…goddamn it, Highwind, you're a fucking dumbass.” Cid raised his uninjured arm over his head, staring at his trembling hand. “Two months…two fucking months…goddamn!”

Raye sighed softly, empathy kicking in as she watched Cid beat himself up.

“Look, it may not be as bad as you think…” she began.

The pilot sat up abruptly, eyes flashing.

“IT'S TWO FUCKING MONTHS!” he cried, voice cracking. “You know how long I've had to wait already?!” He gasped, sinking back to the floor, turning his head away. “Damn. I'm sorry. Never mind. I know I ain't makin' shit fer sense right now.”

Raye closed her eyes. She reasoned that Cid must be pretty messed up to crumple in front of her like this.

“No, no…I know how long you've been working on this thing,” she said sympathetically. Raye paused. “…I can help you if you want.”

Cid went still, actually holding his breath as he pondered the idea a moment. Finally, he let out a shaking breath.

“You dun wanna do that,” he said softly. “I'd end up pissin' ya off is all.”

Raye sniffed. “Well, fine, if you really wanna be behind and all…” she shot him a sideways glance.

“N-no!” Cid sat up all the way this time, his momentum actually bringing him to slump forward on Raye after a moment of dizziness. Raye jumped a little, catching him by the shoulders and supporting him.

“Ugh…” he groaned. “Shit…I'm all fucked up…I s'pose I went out pretty bad, huh?”

Raye nodded. “Yeah, you came down like a ton of bricks. I'm just glad you got yourself off that ladder before you passed out or you woulda had a cracked skull to answer for, too.”

Raye paused noting that he wasn't recovering at all as he shook raggedly in her hands, clearly still in shock.

“Have you…eaten anything?” she inquired.

The pilot gave a small shudder. ““No… and don't make me either! If I had anything right now I'd fucking puke!”

Raye scowled a bit, but decided there was no way she was going to deal with puking on top of the rest of the mess Cid was in. Therefore, she didn't argue for the time being. She sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time in the last thirty minutes.

“Alright. Can I get you anything at all, then?” she offered.

With a little bit of help from Raye, Cid managed to pull himself into a sitting position, cross-legged and cradling his broken wrist against his stomach with his good hand. Cid shook his head, unable to answer and wondering if he might be sick after all, food or not.

“Well, I guess it's study time for me,” Raye said, distracting Cid from his nausea enough to spare him from himself.

“Do what?”

“I said I was gunna help you!” Raye said shortly, crossing her arms over her chest. “Airplanes aren't my exactly my forte, you know.”

Cid blinked at her but managed a small smile. Slowly, his movements shaky, he lurched onto his feet, swaying just a little before regaining his balance.

“C'mon,” Cid said voice unusually low. “I got somethin' fer ya.”

He took a step and swayed a little, which concerned Raye, but he managed to keep his stability.

“Can you make it?” the redhead asked.

Cid nodded. “Yeah, I think so.”

He was already making his way out of the hangar, Captain following behind, and she could do nothing more than to follow.

“Alright, then. What is it you got for me?” the girl inquired.

She hovered at Cid's side, worried he would keel over any moment. Raye didn't like how pale he was, but she figured there wasn't much she could do about it until she was able to get him to eat something, and there was no forcing Cid Highwind into anything.

“Got a bunch `o books ya might like ta look through…”

Cid waved his hands as he talked, but put them down abruptly, hissing in pain. Any movement at all in his left arm was excruciating, and he wasn't quite adapted to not using it.

“Fuck…” he muttered, cradling his cast-bound arm.

“You may have to put that in a sling, Cid,” Raye piped, watching him sternly.

The pilot grumbled with her a little, but didn't disagree, either.

“Yeah…c'mon,” he said, stepping through the back door of his home with Raye following.

She did a quick glance around to find that he was doing a pretty good job at keeping his house clean.

“You know, I've broken my arms enough to know all about this sort of thing,” Raye said, casting him a gentle smile.

Cid looked up at her startled. “Fuck, it's my first go at breaking anything,” he told her.

“Seriously?!”

With as crazy as Cid seemed to be, the girl had a hard time believing that. Shutting the door behind him, Cid staggered to the couch and flopped down, and Raye sat next to him.

“I've cut myself up real bad a few times, though.” He paused leaning back heavily. “Damn…still woozy…” he added softly.

Well, I've broken a bunch of bones,” the redhead announced, oddly proud. “Each arm at least for times a piece, my leg once, cracked my ribs…let's see, what else…?”

Cid turned and stared at her, jaw hanging. “How the fuck do you survive?!”

Raye laughed a little.

“Having five brothers make you pretty tough, you know,” she said. Then she blinked. “Oh! And I've had a fractured skull with about nine stitches in it, too.”

Cid smirked at that.

“This noggin's too thick to crack,” he replied, pointing at his own blond head, belatedly realizing that using his left arm in any fashion was a bad idea. “Shit! Ow!”

Cid leaned forward grasping his upper arm tightly to compensate for the pain.

“Fuck…hey…” he looked over at Raye with pleading eyes. “You know yer way around my house…can ya go into the john and dig out a bottle of aspirin from the top cabinet over the sink?” He took a wavering breath and added, “This sucks…”

Raye giggled a bit at his whining, though she knew he had every reason to complain.

“Sure,” she warmly said, climbing out of his old sagging couch.

Raye wandered down the hall into the bathroom, quickly emerging with the painkillers. She made a brief pit stop in the kitchen to fetch him a glass of water because she would be damned if she let him swallow the pills dry. Returning from the front room, she handed the bottle to Cid and placed the glass of water on the arm of the sofa. The pilot glanced quickly from the pills, to the water, and then up to Raye, smiling sweetly.

“Yer a saint,” he said with much sincerity in his voice.

Gingerly holding the bottle in his bad hand, he shook out a double dose and quickly downed the pills and the entire glass of water. Raye cringed.

“Cid! You took too much!” she scolded. The man was going to burn his stomach out that way, she was certain.

Cid only shrugged carelessly, irking her. “It ain't gunna kill me.”

“It'll make you feel worse than you do now!”

Cid snorted derisively. “Ha, that's fucking impossible.” He sank back in the couch, closing his eyes for a moment. Raye sighed and sat back down beside him.

“It's very possible, Cid.” She warned. “I did that once…oohh boy was it bad.” Cid shrugged again.

“Never been a problem before.” he drawled.

Raye sighed.

“Whatever…”

Leaning forward to rest her chin in her hand, she tilted her head to look at Cid. After a moment, he glanced back at her, noticing her intent look and stared right back.

“What?” He asked flatly. Raye straightened up.

“Nothing…So where are these books at?”

Cid blinked hazily.

“Oh yeah…” With a grunt and a little bit of a struggle, Cid climbed back to his feet. “C'mon, they're back here.”

He was already making his way toward the back room.

“You don't have to get up, Cid.”

“Well I'm up.”

He lead her back into what had once been Shera's room, cringing slightly at the flood of memories that came the moment he stepped through the threshold of the near-empty room as Raye followed closely behind.

Stepping up to the large bookcase, Cid gestured, carefully, with his uninjured hand. “I don't think I should be pulling these out just now, but if I point kin' ya grab `em?”

Cid's voice came out a little dour and Raye snorted, attempting a joke.

“Yeah, yeah. I'm not a weakling, ya know.”

Cid frowned slightly.

“I didn't mean it like that…” he said softly.

Raye laughed.

“I know that! I was teasing you!”

“Oh. Sorry.”

Cid looked away from Raye, biting his lip. Raye frowned for a moment before going back to laughing.

“Oh come on!” She laughed, punching in the arm playfully.

Raye didn't realize her mistake at first. The rippling wave of agony the good-humored punch to his left bicep had stunned him badly enough that not a sound would come out of his throat. White, and silent, Cid could only sway dizzily. However, his silence in itself was enough to cue Raye.

“SHIT! Sorry! Oh my god! I'm so sorry!” Raye watched in horror as Cid lost another shade of color, his skin turning from ashen to almost sheet white. He turned glazed and watering eyes on Raye. His gaze was forgiving, but it didn't make the girl feel any better.

“Geez, I'm sorry, Cid,” she repeated softly.

Finally, Cid managed to gasp some breath back into his lungs.

“Heh…” He shook, swaying. “Ughh….” Giving up on speech, and holding himself up fully, he pitched foreword slightly to drop his forehead against Raye's shoulder. In the back of his mind, he realized that she probably wouldn't appreciate the invasion of her personal space, but she was there, soft, sturdy, and…she smelled good. He closed his eyes slowly, leaning into her shoulder, and took a shuddering breath trying to still his spinning world. It didn't help much, and Cid felt himself slide off Raye's shoulder, inanely wondering if he would fall to the floor. Raye, sensing his dilemma, and still feeling bad for setting off another wave of clammy shock, caught him by the shoulders, holding him up. Her voice was whisper soft when she spoke.

“You need to sit down, Cid.”

The pilot could only groan, afraid to move, even with her support. He plastered his face to her shoulder, crushing his eyes against the cool fabric of her shirt. An embarrassed blush crept across Raye's face as Cid nuzzled her. She hadn't a clue how to react to his actions, but she only knew he couldn't stay the way he was, at least not for long. Glancing past Cid, she spotted the couch she'd slept on during her previous visit and moved her own body under Cid's enough to prop his limp form up against her, using her own balance to move him.

“Hey, come on. You need to lie down awhile,” she whispered.

He nodded into her neck, right hand coming up to clutch at the back of her shirt in an attempt to support himself as she led him the short footsteps to the couch. After two unstable steps, Raye was helping to ease Cid down into a slumped but sitting position. Sprawled weak and pale, Cid allowed his head to drop back as he let out a groan.

“Mmmph… 'M so fucking dizzy…”

Raye watched uncomfortably as his face went from simply pale to an ashen grey.

“Cid? You gonna be okay?”

Cid's only response was a last whine of discomfort as his eyes visibly rolled back into his head before he passed out completely, slumping against Raye as the last of his strength gave into unconsciousness.

Raye let out a long, tired sigh as Cid's eyelids fluttered shut and his pained breathing finally began to even out. Cid's head lolled on her shoulder, and, blushing slightly, Raye let her gaze wander about the small room for a moment. She huffed, and sighed, and finally relaxed.

I'd better just stay a while so he doesn't kill himself…

She hated her magnanimous nature, at times. Shifting awkwardly under Cid's weight, she wiggled about in her seat until she could pull her cell phone out of her front jeans pocket, and with a final huff, quickly dialed her home number. She turned her face away from Cid's limp figure as she listened to the ring tone, and finally to the rich, welcoming sound of her father's voice answering.

“Hi, Dad.”

She paused as he replied to her with a cheerful, “What's up?”

She blew a stray bit of hair out of her face, glancing back at Cid's now peaceful face as her father spoke. “Are you on your way home, kiddo?”

“No. Look, your idiot buddy has gone and nearly killed himself today, so I gotta stay around for a while.”

“Almost killed himself? How?” Rick asked concerned.

“Oh, he went off and broke his arm trying to manually bully a busted part out of that airplane of his,” Raye explained to her father. “And on top of that, I think he's been sick, and this whole arm thing just aggravated it even more.”

“How's he doing? Is he awake?”

“No, he passed out…I don't think he takes pain too well.”

Rick Shields' laughter tinkled out of the tiny speaker in Raye's phone, and she smirked at his response.

“So what will you do now? Are you gonna go ahead and come home later?”

“I dunno. He's unconscious again. It's pathetic, Dad, but I can't just leave him here! I guess I'll let you know later.”

“Okay. About what time, do ya think?”

“Huh? Oh, I don't know. As soon as possible, though. I hate this dump!”

“Well, alright then. You do what you feel you need to do. Brad and I can manage.”

“I'm really sorry, Dad.”

“No, no. It's alright. Ol' Highwind needs a little tender lovin' care right now.”

Raye rolled her eyes. Cid needed care, but it wasn't going to be anywhere close to tender and loving, that was for sure.

“Yeah, yeah. Well I'll see you later, then.”

She hung up and set her phone on the table beside the couch, then glanced down at Cid, who had slid almost all the way down her front. She propped both hands under his shoulders and eased him into a laying position, his head resting on her thigh.

“You sure are a peaceful sleeper,” she told him in a low whisper. Cid, of course, could not hear. “Almost like you're an entirely different person…”

Reaching up, Raye grabbed a blanket that was resting on the back of the couch, and laid it out over him, tucking the edge in around his bad arm, to help keep it still in case he decided to move in his sleep. Satisfied with that, she carefully pulled his goggles away from his forehead, unconsciously letting her fingers thread through his unruly, but soft hair. Cid stirred slightly at the touch, giving a soft sigh and relaxing further into sleep, smiling softly. When she removed her hand, setting his goggles beside her phone, her fingers were warm.

Upon seeing the small smile gracing Cid's lips, Raye's own expression softened.

Maybe you're not so bad after all… she thought, brushing his hair away from his forehead gently, watching in warm bemusement as his features relaxed even further, the underlying pain in his expression fading away. She combed her fingers through his hair once more before she suddenly realized, with a fierce burst of heat to her face, what she was doing. Alarmed, she snatched her hand away from him, holding it up in the air in a moment of indecision.

Gawd! What was I doing?!

After a moment, her arm started to get tired and she slowly lowered it to his shoulder, letting it rest there. He was cool to the touch, and she pulled the blanket up a little further up his chest. Finally relaxing again, she glanced back down at Cid to see that he was still smiling softly in his sleep.

“Asshole,” she growled, sinking back in defeat.

Raye catnapped on and off throughout the afternoon, letting Cid have his rest. He hadn't woken up once, and she was content to sit and think for a while, napping between thoughts. She was irritated with herself for going into her super-mom mode with Cid, but then again, she reasoned, he sort of needed it. She couldn't imagine what would have happened to him had she not been there, and she didn't even want to think about what he might have tried to do afterwards, regardless of his weakened state.

It was well past midnight and she found her mind tripping over the days' events, mingled with her own misgivings and self-irritation once again. Despite all her internal grumbling, she did have to admit that she rather enjoyed the warm-fuzzy feeling that came with doing a good deed, especially the type that involved caring for others. Cid may think she's an acidic bitch, but she really did have her warm side. He just pissed her off so much that he probably would never see it. She sat, wondering at this, chin propped in one hand, gazing out the now moonlit window, other hand idly tracing faint circles across Cid's shoulder in slow, soothing strokes. She had resisted the urge to comfort him at first, but it had quickly become evident that he relaxed so much more easily with a little physical contact. All she had to do was keep a hand on him, and he slept peacefully. Raye told her self she didn't care so much how he slept, but when he tensed up in pain, his shoulder blades dug into her thigh rather painfully, and she started to lose circulation.

Her gaze aimed out the window, Raye didn't notice immediately the slits of shining cobalt that appeared as Cid's eyes drifted open. Groggy, and still mostly incoherent, he stared up at the woman above him for a long while, trying to remember what he'd done to land himself in such a position. It was hazy, but he remembered getting hurt…and passing out…standing up….Raye…He closed his eyes again, giving a deep sigh that caught Raye's attention.

“Hm? You awake?” she whispered. Cid opened his eyes again, shooting her an almost alarmingly clear and sincere smile. Raye unconsciously held her breath.

“Y' stayed…” Cid said. His voice was low, his words slurred, but the way he spoke, it was as if heaven itself had fallen to earth.

“Well duh.” Raye said trying to ignore the weird fluttering the look he was giving her caused deep in her belly. “I couldn't let you just flop over and die.”

Cid's lips quirked and he laughed silently, pushing himself up on his elbow suddenly. Not having a half second to anticipate the sudden movement, Raye could only gasp as Cid's lips suddenly connected with hers, just for the barest of moments. The kiss was caste, but the warmth and softness of his lips were surprising.

How do they stay so soft, with all the hard words that come out of his mouth…?

In that split second, Cid pulled away again and settled into her lap once more, eyes fluttering shut.

“Thank you.”

Sighing, he careened back into unconsciousness, body relaxing again suddenly. Raye sat gasping for a few moments, staring in wide-eyed disbelief at the man in her lap, half wanting to kick him off her. Yet, her merciful nature restrained her from doing so. Was it the double dose of pain pills? Was he just dreaming? Whatever it was, this shit was messed up - and dangerous.

“…Cid?” she asked, not quietly. Wake up damn it, and explain what the fuck that was all about?!

She tried being angry, but all she could think about was the slide of warmth that was still radiating in flickering sparks from her lips down her throat and into her chest, where it fluttered stubbornly, refusing to die.

Cid slept on, not answering, and Raye eventually gave up on consciousness as well, drifting off to sleep once more.