Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ New Love ❯ Chapter 18

New Love

 

Chapter 18

 

Cloud opened his eyes and groaned, closing them again. Too early, he didn't need to look at the clock to know that. He turned his head and rolled over.

 

“AH!”

 

Cloud let out a cry as he hit the carpet with a loud thump, his head tingling. He let out a lower, longer groan and momentarily wondered why he was sleeping on a couch. Then, he remembered.

 

“Cloooooud! What did I tell you last night?” Yuffie's voice came from down the hall. Cloud rolled his eyes and sat up, rubbing his head.

 

“Don't roll off the couch in your sleep,” he grumbled.

 

“What did you just do?”

 

“That's different, I was awake!” Even as he spoke, Cloud mentally slapped himself for how stupid that sounded. Yuffie had given him fair warning to be careful the previous night. He should have listened to her.

 

When he'd hung up on her, he'd quietly packed a couple changes of clothes and left, Tifa not even looking up at him as he walked past. He hated leaving her like that, but any attempts to console her likely wouldn't help. He'd gotten in his car and driven to Yuffie's house. True to her word, she'd put up the couch for him. After she'd gone to bed, Cloud had spent half the night awake thinking.

 

Cloud put a hand on the couch and pushed himself up. He heard a door open and looked over at the hallway. Yuffie walked out of the hallway in a light green robe, grinning at him.

 

“Morning blondie,” she smiled, heading past the couch into the kitchen.

 

“Don't tell me you're a morning person,” Cloud said, laying back down on the couch.

 

“The day is too short to spend even a minute of it half-asleep!” Yuffie called. “Coffee?”

 

“You planning to make it right this time?”

 

“Yes,” Yuffie said, coming back out. “How about some breakfast, how do you like your eggs?”

 

“Hatched, grown into a chicken and baked at four-fifty degrees,” Cloud said dryly. Yuffie didn't move, and he sighed. “I don't like eggs all that much.”

 

“Scrambled?”

 

“Whatever.” Yuffie returned to the kitchen as Cloud looked at the clock display on Yuffie's VCR/DVD combo. It was roughly an hour before he normally left for work. Normally he would wake up now or a few minutes later, but the previous night had left him tired.

 

“What am I gonna do?” Cloud thought, closing his eyes. He couldn't hide in Yuffie's apartment for the rest of his life, sooner or later he'd run out of clothes. And next week Aeris would come back to work. He knew by then, he'd have to have something to tell her.

 

“So how long are you planning on crashing here?” Yuffie called from the kitchen.

 

“How long can you put up with me?” Cloud said.

 

“I'm serious Cloud.”

 

“So am I. I don't know, really. I'm not at all looking forward to going back to Tifa, if she'll even take me back.”

 

“Do you want her to take you back? Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't you end up sleeping in my living room due to a chain of events caused by you're being in an unsatisfying relationship?”

 

“I hate you when you're right,” Cloud muttered. Yuffie came back in the living room and sat down beside Cloud.

 

“So…how're you doing?” Yuffie asked. “How did it go with her, you never told me.” Cloud sighed and scrunched up his face.

 

“It was strange…I expected her to yell and scream at me, part of me felt like I should yell and scream at her. But when she opened the door…I just felt so…so…drained. I was surprised when she reacted as she did…I think I wanted her to yell at me, make me feel bad, but she didn't.”

 

“Tifa never did strike me as the yelling type much,” Yuffie agreed.

 

“Yeah, but…I would have rather she yelled at me then do what she did. She just seemed so…”

 

“Crushed? Heartbroken? Emotionally shattered beyond any hope repair?”

 

“Yeah, thanks for the help,” Cloud said bitterly. Yuffie grinned and patted him on the back.

 

“I try.”

 

- - - - - - - - - -

 

“A compendium of ways Jamie and I have been wrong.”

 

Click.

 

“Hey, don't you talk that way to me boy!”

 

Click.

 

“Our next guest hails from Mideel and is engaged!”

 

Click.

 

“When did I suddenly stop having a life?” Aeris asked herself, flipping channels. Still in her nightgown, the brunette had her legs drawn up on her couch as she searched for something to watch. Monday had reminded her that, when she didn't go out, didn't go to work and didn't use the Internet except for work, life as she knew it didn't exist within the walls of her apartment.

 

Aeris hit the Mute button as she flipped to a game show and stood up, moving into the kitchen. It was only ten-thirty, too early for lunch, but she was hungry now, who was keeping track? Aeris opened the cupboard over the stove and pulled out a small plastic container of instant macaroni and slipped it into the microwave. She punched in the time and hit Start, watching as the tray in the microwave rotated.

 

She had to pull a string with an old friend to get off work for a week. She hated to take time off even when sick, but this time she made an exception. Working alongside Cloud all day, considering what he was going through, what had happened…it would be too stressful for the both of them to handle. Regardless of what Cloud did or didn't want to do with her once he got his affairs in order - Aeris winced at the word her mind used - she couldn't work at Shinra anymore if he was going to be there.

 

“So, I guess I'm quitting then,” Aeris sighed. “I can't work with him, even if…” Aeris stopped the thought before she completed it. Cloud had to sort out his feelings for her and Tifa and it wasn't her place to interfere, she'd done enough of that already. Still, where was it written that she couldn't hope he chose her?

 

“So I like him…that's understandable, given…” Aeris mumbled, lowering her eyes. She felt the familiar guilt rise up from her. She wanted to be with Cloud. That, according to simple logic and common sense, meant he couldn't be with Tifa. She felt like some sort of interloper or whore who told her friend's boyfriend. “But I am, aren't I?” Aeris asked herself. She hadn't planned for Cloud to fall for her, or for her to start falling for him in turn, but it had somehow happened. Didn't that absolve her in any way?

 

The microwave bell chimed as the macaroni finished cooking. Aeris grabbed a spoon from the drawer and opened the door. No, not really, regardless of her intentions or initial desires, in the end nothing would change what had happened. Tifa had gone, and she and Cloud had slept together. Did Tifa even know the full story of what had happened? Or did Tifa think she had planned it out like some sort of seductress, waiting for her to leave before she stole Cloud for herself?

 

“She probably hates me,” Aeris said bitterly, tearing the covering off the plastic container. “Can't say I blame her.” The secretary walked back into the living room of her apartment and sat back down, stirring her quick snack absentmindedly. Had their positions been reversed, she may have hated Tifa, though she wasn't sure. Then again, had Aeris been the one dating Cloud and Tifa was his co-worker…Aeris shook her head to disperse the idea. That was a line of thought that lead to another road of bitter, angry feelings that she had no desire to go down. She wasn't Tifa, she wasn't in Tifa's position. She couldn't imagine how she felt right now.

 

- - - - - - - - - -

 

Zangan lifted a thick eyebrow as Tifa's fists and feet slammed at the training dummy, the blows landing hard and fast. Tifa was sweating and panting heavily, her bangs sticking to her forehead. Zangan watched her silently. She was leaving herself open to counter-attacks from all angles, but he doubted she'd want to hear that. Thus far she'd gone five minutes without stopping. She was likely exhausted but she wouldn't stop. Tifa landed two more punches and spun to kick.

 

“Tifa, that's enough,” Zangan said, taking a step forward. Tifa spun around and slammed her heel into Zangan's jaw. The instructor cried out as he was knocked back across the room, spinning around and falling forward onto the training mats below.

 

“Oh my god, Zangan!” Tifa cried, running to him. “Are you alright?”

 

“I think…I may have a concussion,” Zangan groaned, shakily climbing to his feet. He stumbled slightly and blinked rapidly. “Give me a moment, Tifa.”

 

“I'm so sorry, I didn't see you,” Tifa said, leading Zangan to a bench by the training area. Zangan held his head and looked up at Tifa as he sat down.

 

“Tifa, you've been absent-minded all day,” Zangan said. “What's going on?” Tifa's eyes widened slightly, and she turned away.

 

“I…” Tifa hesitated for a moment. “When we were at the exhibition, Cloud, he…someone else…” Zangan's eyes narrowed.

 

“I see,” he said lowly. “Permit me to be blunt; who, and why?”

 

“His secretary, and he says he's in love with her.”

 

“Hmmm….” Zangan thought for a moment. “And you?”

 

“Huh?” Tifa turned her head back. “What do you mean?”

 

“I'm asking how you're handling, though if your distracted performance today is any indication I have a rather good guess,” Zanfan said. Tifa bit her lip.

 

“I just want him to be happy,” she whispered. “And I want it to be with me, but…”

 

“He isn't happy,” Zangan finished.

 

“Looking back, he hasn't been, I don't think,” Tifa said. “Cloud has always been the quiet type, even around me. For so long I thought that was all right because I still knew him, but now I'm not so sure. I don't want to think he's been unhappy, though. I've always been there for him any way I can, but…I guess that hasn't been enough.” Tifa closed her eyes and hung her head.

 

“Be strong,” Zangan said sternly. “Tifa, you've strength within you and I don't mean your muscles. You're a strong woman, you can handle this.”

 

“Handle that I could lose the man I love because I'm not good enough for him?” Tifa spat.

 

“That's rather cynical. Don't say that, you know Cloud wouldn't. He does love you, but perhaps he simply loves this other woman more. There is nothing you can do for this. The heart will want what it wants, and using the brain to worry and fret about it will do nothing but confuse them both.”

 

“I just…can't help but feel this is my fault,” Tifa admitted. “Did I do something wrong, or not do something? Could I have adverted this?”

 

“Tifa, you are a loving, caring, intelligent, beautiful young woman. You've done nothing wrong here and have no business sharing the blame. It wasn't you who cheated, after all. I don't want to seem cruel, but if you must blame someone, I'd say the blame lies with Cloud”

 

“But you said it yourself,” Tifa lifted her head and opened watery eyes. “The heart wants what it wants. If Cloud's heart lead him away from me, how can I blame him, or Aeris? If I'm not to blame, and neither are they, whose fault is this?” Zangan took a deep breath and paused.

 

“I don't know.”

 

- - - - - - - - - -

 

“Look buddy, I advise you to run, run far away, before she tightens the noose and hangs you out to dry. Find someone who doesn't drag you around by the balls, unless she does it in private too. See ya later.” Reno hung up, and Cloud, not for the first time since listening to the broadcast that day, narrowed his eyes. He reached over and picked up the phone receiver and dialed.

 

“Alrighty, we got time for one last call today!” Reno said

 

Cloud looked up at the radio on his desk as he listened to the phone ring. Finally, it picked up.

 

“Red Hot Radio, hurry up we're almost outta time,” the women on the other line said.

 

“Hi, my name is Steve, I called Reno earlier in a month about a problem with my love life,” Cloud said.

 

“Great, he loves follow-ups, we'll patch ya through.”

 

“Thanks.” The line went on hold, and Cloud drummed his fingers on the desk.

 

“For our last call, we got an old buddy dropping in with an update over some love stories for us,” Reno said on the radio. The line clicked in Cloud's ear, and he was listening to Reno in stereo. “Hiya Steve, how they hanging?”

 

“Hello Reno,” Cloud said dryly. “Remember me? I called a few weeks ago dating `a goddess' as you said, being unsatisfied.”

 

“Nope, don't ring a bell, but let's keep going,” Reno replied.

 

“Well, I just wanted to thank you for your advice,” Cloud said.

 

“Sure, no prob man.”

 

“It really made me realize that the two of us were both idiots that day,” Cloud continued.

 

“Yeah, well I…wait, what?” Reno cried.

 

“I was an idiot for thinking someone like you could help me,” Cloud said, “and you were an even worse idiot for thinking you could too.”

 

“Hey, listen buddy!”

 

“No, you listen!” Cloud snapped back. “And all of you out there tuned in, listen too! I talked to this guy, my best friends, a psychiatrist, my secretary, and my mom, and you know who helped me? I did, me. I made the choice, I made the move, and I'm dealing with the consequences. And looking back I realize what a fool I was for asking others to make that choice for me.” Cloud took a breath and calmed down slightly.

 

“We all want help making the tough choices, but in the end it's on us. Reno, you don't have my job, my life or my girlfriend, so how can I possibly trust you to make help me with my decisions? None of us can, instead of looking to others for help, maybe we should try looking at a mirror instead. Because if we can't rely on our judgment, then it won't matter what decision we make because it'll never feel right. And if you're going to let someone else make your choices, you may as well trust some street performer or a rival co-worker instead of this guy because none of them will make the right one. Especially this guy.”

 

Cloud hung up as Reno sputtered on the radio.

 

“I…listen up, you son of a-”

 

“I don't think so.” Cloud reached up to the radio and slowly turned down the volume, Reno's shouts and rants fading away.

 

I had wanted Cloud to have a follow-up with Reno with his newfound sense of confidence and assertion, so here it is. Otherwise this chapter is meant to give insight into the three LT members, and really just to drag out the drama.

 

Next chapter will be the third-to-last! Don't miss it!