Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ Reborn ❯ Chapter 3
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: MikariStar 
Non Anime: Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Adventure / Comedy / Drama | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 07.23.2012 | Pages: 5 | Words: 6.8K | Visits: 319 | Status: Completed
Non Anime: Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Adventure / Comedy / Drama | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 07.23.2012 | Pages: 5 | Words: 6.8K | Visits: 319 | Status: Completed
Reborn: Memory III
Incident 21: Taking Turns
Rude managed to give Yazoo a haircut without any major troublesome incidents occurring, though it was only a small haircut, a mere two inches. Then of course, Rufus had to keep his word and wash Yazoo's hair, and while this was being done, Kadaj frowned. "How come daddy didn't wash my hair?"
Rufus was getting tired of all of this. Washing someone's hair was harder than it looked. Though ironically, he could spend hours washing his own. "Alright, I'll wash it again," Rufus grumbled.
"How come you're only washing my hair once?" Yazoo complained.
Rufus mentally counted to ten, "because that's all it takes for it to be clean, and Kadaj I'll wash your hair next time."
"Why not now?" Kadaj whined.
"Because it's already clean," it was logical, Rufus thought, but those three boys knew nothing about logic. Then Loz started wailing full force, causing Rufus and the Turks to jump in surprise. "Loz, what's wrong?"
"I'm not getting any attention at all!" Loz cried.
"I'll wash your hair too when I'm done with Yazoo," Rufus offered.
But that wasn't quite enough for little Loz, "how come I have to go last? Am I your least favorite?"
Rufus's teeth were clenched, his eyes were twitching and he was forcing himself to smile, resulting in the creepiest expression the Turks ever saw; but nobody cared as long as it was somewhat of a smile. "You'll be the first next time."
"I want to be the first! If I have to wait until next time for you to wash my hair, then I should be first!" Kadaj stomped his feet.
"What about me? I was second today and I have to be second again the next time?" Yazoo complained.
"I want to be first!" Loz added.
"Stop it! Stop arguing!" Rufus yelled at the top of his lungs.
Then the three remnants grimaced in a chorus, "am I your least favorite?"
Rufus looked at the Turks searching for help, they had been awfully quiet letting him handle the situation and the young president didn't like it at all. Tseng opened his mouth to say something, thought better of it and closed it again. Rude remained as quiet as he always was and Elena looked like she was in deep thought.
After the long pause, Reno spoke, "I think," and four hands belonging to Rufus, Tseng, Rude and Elena were simultaneously thrown over his mouth. When Reno started a sentence with 'I think' it usually meant trouble, because everyone knows that's a lie.
After Reno was silenced and some more careful thinking was put into the dangerous situation, Elena proposed a solution. "Next time, you can take a bath and have your hair washed in the pool at the same time."
"But I want to be first!" The remnants complained in unison.
"You will all be first," Elena assured.
Finally, the rain that had started up outside ceased, the wind that was beginning to pick up died down and Reno's random aches and pain stopped, indicating that a good enough consensus had been reached with the three remnants.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 22: Training
After the haircut ordeal was over, instead of being thankful he survived and keeping a low profile for at least the rest of the day, Rufus wasn't satisfied. "We're going to see the designer."
"No!" Reno wailed in agony. He hated Darla and the way she always criticized him for being sloppy and making the Turk suit she designed look 'cheap'.
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I agree with Reno," Elena spoke the words she never thought would come out of her mouth. Though Darla had nothing to say about Elena's attire, she always went out of her way to compliment Tseng and Elena didn't like that at all.
Rude remained silent as usual and Tseng decided that it was in his best interest to remain silent even if he was very surprised by Elena's statement. Then Rufus pouted and declared, "we're going!"
The remnants looked unsure. Their father wanted to go see this person for a reason that was unknown to them, but both uncle Reno and aunt Elena seemed to dislike this designer their father spoke of. Normally, they would trust their daddy's choices, but after the haircut disaster they weren't so sure. Unfortunately the logic of he remnants would turn out to be very difficult and inconvenient for Rufus and the Turks to deal with, when it doubt, cry. Thus the silver haired trio began to cry and once again the skies turned dark, rain began to pour and wind started to blow.
"What's wrong now?" Rufus asked exasperated.
"You're not protecting us, you're letting mean people hurt us!" Kadaj yelled; eyes filled with tears, cheeks red from crying, his expression matched that of his brothers.
"What are you talking about? You three are the dangerous ones!" Rufus was telling the truth, but it was a truth that should not be spoken.
Tseng was seriously starting to consider finding a way to cast a permanent spell of silence on Rufus. Sure his paycheck would be in danger, but the Turk leader reasoned that he would have no use for gil if he was killed in action before the next payday. If only everyone would learn that following Rude's example was a good idea. Tseng came to truly admire Rude's superb survival skills.
However, the bald Turk wasn't completely mute, he remained quiet most of the time but he spoke when he needed to speak, saying only what needed to be said, "training."
The cries of the three sons of Jenova came to an abrupt halt, as did the bad weather and Reno's sickly sensation. "Training," the three silver haired boys whispered in unison.
"Daddy is training us to be strong like our big brother Sephiroth..." Kadaj reasoned, "I knew that!" Thus the emergency was solved with a single word from Rude; it was all about knowing what to say and when to say it.
But of course, the chorus of "no you didn't," from Yazoo and Loz, followed by "yes I did," from Kadaj, soon filled the air. At least they weren't crying.
Rufus massaged his temples and shook his head. "Designer now, and then we're going home." Rufus really needed to rest, but he couldn't be associated as the father of three boys who were not up to date with the latest fashions. After all, vanity was a high priority for Rufus Shinra.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 23: Fashion Criminal
"What darling children!" Darla squealed at the top of her lungs. Though she was a well known professional designer and the clothes she made and sold were always exquisitely elegant, the clothes she designed to wear herself more often than not looked awful. It was a strange ironic contradiction that no one understood. Though for anyone else wearing stripes and spots was a capital sin, she wore them all the time and it was perfectly fine.
Every time Rufus saw the designer he wondered how such an eyesore could make him look so good. Today Darla's outfit consisted of a chocobo yellow shirt with cotton candy pink vertical stripes, a lime green skirt with red polka dots, which was cut diagonally making it knee length on the left side and ankle length on the right side. Her shoes were purple with an overload of royal blue glitters, her earrings were tribal style wooden hoops and she had a delicate golden tiara with pearl decorations as a diadem.
Darla's hair was also a fashion crime, it tried to be blond but in the end it was a strange mossy green. Distracted as she was, she must have forgotten one of her contact lenses and she saw the world with one brown eye and a silver one.
Yet somewhere, underneath that catastrophe that Darla dared to call an outfit, a perfect model body was hidden. It was a fact that became apparent when she wore decent clothes, fixed the color of her hair and didn't get her contact lenses mixed up. Why didn't she look like that all the time? Nobody knew. Maybe she was insane; but insane or not, she was still considered a fashion genius.
"Tseng you look wonderfully handsome today!" Darla complimented the Turk leader who unconsciously backed away, while Elena glared daggers at Darla but said nothing.
Elena couldn't believe herself getting jealous of that insane train wreck, even if she could be beautiful when she tried.
Then Darla gave Reno a disapproving look, "sloppy, terribly sloppy, you look awful!" She shook her head disapprovingly in an exaggerated way, flipping her long hair from side to side.
"Who cares," Reno stuck out his tongue, "the fan girls think I'm hot so there!" He pouted and tried to ignore Darla's annoying precense for the rest of the visit.
"Hmp!" Darla threw her head back, ignored Elena and Rude, and turned her attention to Rufus and the children. "Tell me darling, are these lovely children related to you?" She batted her long fake black eye lashes at Rufus and smiled, teeth painted maroon from her lipstick.
"Yes," Rufus declared with more pride than the Turks would ever expect. "They're my sons, Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz."
While the Turks, Reno included, were shocked to silence, Darla squealed happily. "Come my three little darlings, come to Darla!"
Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz had looked rather nervous from the start, but they tried to keep their cool and be brave for daddy. However, this was too much. Training or not, they knew they weren't ready to handle this. "No clown!" The three remnants screamed and ran outside crying.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 24: Big Brother Black Sheep
The screech of tires was heard as Fenrir came to a sudden halt in the street outside Darla's fashion designing studio. "Watch where you're... going?" Cloud couldn't believe his eyes. His heart was pounding fast enough because he almost ran over three kids who dashed into the road unexpectedly, and he nearly went into cardiac arrest when he took a better look at the three boys.
"Big Brother Black Sheep!" As the remnants yelled out to Cloud, the ground shook, extending the cracks that had formed on the road due to the recent series of earthquakes and crazy weather. Light rain fell, and the three remnants and Cloud were soaked as the kids hopped on their big brother's lap, trying to sit there together despite there hardly being enough for three children.
Cloud was shocked, to say the least. The weather had been positively insane, but even so he braved the random storms to deliver packages, however the journeys had not been easy. Now he was starting to suspect that maybe Sephiroth was behind all this and maybe that's why he found three little kids who looked like younger versions of Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz. "Seph... Sephiroth..." Cloud whispered the name as if he dared not say it aloud for fear of the legendary First Class Solder appearing before him as if being summoned.
"I wish Big Brother Sephiroth was here too," Kadaj agreed, accompanied by the nods of Yazoo and Loz. Although their silver haired older brother, mother's favorite, wasn't around to protect them, Big Brother Black Sheep, also known as Cloud Strife, turned out to be enough to calm them.
"You'll protect us from the clown, right?" Loz asked with hope in his teary eyes.
"Clown?" As if finding three boys who looked so much like the remnants of his rival wasn't strange enough, now those same boys were asking to be protected from a clown.
"She's in there," Yazoo pointed at Darla's studio, in front of which Rufus and the Turks stood in shock as they witnessed the scene.
"I... ah... Strife... Go!" Rufus stumbled on his words before finally sending the Turks into action.
With the rain gone along with the tears, Reno had another quick recovery from his pains and joined Tseng, Elena and Rude in the mission of recovering the remnants before Cloud caused any trouble. Or at least they assumed that's what Rufus was asking them to do by telling them to 'go'.
"We'll take them back to their father now," Tseng spoke with complete seriousness, despite having to look at the strangest, most confused expression he had ever seen upon Cloud Strife's face.
"Come children, daddy's waiting for you," Elena smiled sweetly, Rude nodded reassuringly and Reno tried to hold back his laughter.
Rufus was not happy, he was not happy at all, and when Rufus was not happy, the Turks were in trouble. But that would have to wait until later, because the young president had a strong feeling that it would be very troublesome if he lost the trust of the remnants and they turned to Cloud for protection. "It's okay; daddy won't let the mean clown lady hurt you, let's go home now."
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 25: Excuses
Cloud Strife had not lived an easy life. Though there was a time when he feared he would be an ordinary country boy forever, lately there were times when he wished he had remained a simple country boy. The illusionary Soldier First Class turned delivery boy, had seen many shocking things in his life. He saw a legendary hero become insane and burn down his home town, he watched as his long time crush endured hardship and got tangled up in his confusion, and he witnessed many dear friends pass on to the life stream.
All of those things were surprising and unnerving, many of those events even being classified as traumatic. But it all fell short of the pure shock that Cloud was feeling right now. He was in fact less surprised when he admitted he was the master of his own illusionary world in comparison to what he was seeing now.
"Ru... Rufus..." The name was pushed out with more effort that it should require. "Shinra..." Cloud's mako glowing eyes were wide, his jaw hanging open after uttering those two words. Did his eyes deceive him? Was this all a dream? Or could it be that Rufus was indeed the father, adoptive Cloud assumed, of three little boys who looked too much like Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz?
The three little boys looked at their big brother then back at their father. Finally, Kadaj, the leader for whom Yazoo and Loz were waiting to make a choice, nodded and went back to Rufus followed by his brothers. Cloud continued to stare, taking a moment to rub his eyes and shake his head, still having some difficulty believing that this wasn't a dream. Then, after the obligatory father and sons hug, Rufus glared at Cloud and at the Turks, before walking off with the remnants towards the helicopter. Tseng, Elena, Reno and Rude followed the young president turned unwilling father, leaving Cloud without a much needed explanation.
"Wait!" Cloud called after the group. "What's this about? Are those really the remnants of Sephiroth?" At this point he gripped his sword, "if so then..."
Elena looked at Cloud disapprovingly, "could you really? They're just children."
"But they're dangerous..." and yet so small that Cloud could hardly see them as a threat and had to convince himself they were, though they were indeed far more deadly than he imagined. "I don't know what you're up to, but I won't allow it."
"Alright, enough jokes," Rufus decided it was time to interfere. "Just because they look like the remnants doesn't mean they are."
"But they mentioned Sephiroth," Cloud argued.
"It's from that children's book," Rufus tried to explain.
Cloud had seen the aforementioned book back in Nibelheim years ago, when Sephiroth was still a legendary hero. It was one of those 'be good' educational books with pictures of 'big brother Sephiroth', the hero whom so many people admired. "That's not even being printed anymore, is it?" Cloud doubted they had Sephiroth's permission to print it in the first place anyway.
"I have a copy," Rufus replied. The remnants remained oblivious as to what was happening, assuming they should just ignore the grown up talk they didn't understand. Then Rufus made a shocking revelation, which was obviously a lie, but still made him shudder. "They are my children, they just look like their mother, that's all."
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 26: Hair
Though it wasn't all that late, Rufus and the Turks were already exhausted. The trip back to Healin Lodge went by relatively uneventful after they managed to get away from a shocked Cloud Strife. Rufus wished for nothing more than some peace and quiet. The young president collapsed into a luxurious chair in the living room, while the remnants watched cartoons in the high-tech big screen TV.
"I don't know if I should ask," Elena began, "but I'm curious," the way her sentence started could only indicate the coming of an unwanted question. "Reno, why is it that Rude cuts your hair?" The fact had been made known at some point among the chaos of the day and Elena wanted more information, just for the sake of knowing, to satisfy her natural curiosity.
"Because," Reno obviously avoided the question.
Elena then directed her curious gaze towards Rude, "why?"
Rude merely nodded as if repeating Reno's answer in a silent form. There was a pause during which Elena insisted with her eyes and Rude finally shrugged.
A moment of silence went by and Tseng became curious, "what is the real reason?"
"No reason," Reno pouted, he didn't like where the conversation was going.
"Did you have a traumatic experience in a hair salon?" Elena inquired.
"Looks like the kids like the Powerpuff Girls Z," Reno abruptly changed the subject and on cue the tree silver haired boys blushed.
"Girls have cooties!" Kadaj pouted. "All girls do, except auntie Elena and Blossom," he blushed at the mention of the pink puff's name.
"Bubbles doesn't have cooties either, she's cute," Yazoo defended.
"I like Buttercup," Loz shyly added.
A few more minutes passed with the discussion of the Powerpuff Girls Z and which was the cutest. Then another moment of silence settled in when the final battle of the episode came on and the remnants were too busy watching to continue the conversation.
Finally, the topic of Reno's hair came to light again. "Reno, about your hair," Elena insisted.
"Just leave my hair alone!" Reno really didn't want to talk about it.
Tseng raised an eyebrow suspiciously. "Why are you getting defensive?"
"I'm not!" Reno continued to pout childishly.
Elena wanted to ask if Reno actually glued a wig to his head and only pretended to get haircuts, with Rude as the only person to know the truth. Reno would only tell him since they were best friends and Rude was bald so he would understand. But to avoid possibly offending Rude, who wouldn't have been offended anyway but Elena could sometimes be self conscious about what she said, thus avoided suggesting the possibility of Reno being bald. However, she would still continue her curious inquiry in a relatively less sensitive direction. "Is it that your hair isn't really red?"
"It is red!" Reno tried to defend his hair, but the argument wasn't very convincing given his avoidance of the subject.
"Is it blond?" Elena continued asking.
"It's red!" Reno insisted.
"Is it white? Are you embarrassed to have white hair at such a young age so you dye it red? You shouldn't be embarrassed, I once heard a legend about these rabbit people called viera, and having white hair was an honor for them. Of course that's just a legend and having white hair at your age would be very odd. Silver is fine, but white? Still, there's no need to hide it, you can trust us with your secret; we won't tell anyone." Elena's ramblings were not helping Reno feel any better.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 27: Temper, Temper
Fed up with everything, Reno finally admitted the truth about why Rude cut his hair. "It's because my hair is too bright and shiny and if I go get a haircut they always ask me a billion questions about how I keep it this way. They won't believe me when I say I don't do anything special and keep asking for my 'secret' over and over. It's so annoying! And, and… when I was a little kid they would always call me Cutie Carrot-top!"
After a moment of silence, Elena finally nodded, "well, I guess your hair is kind of pretty, but you never brush it. Really Reno, you should take better care of your appearance. I like Tseng's hair best; it's so long and soft." Elena blushed realizing what she was saying, and soon after quieted.
Then it was up to Tseng to fill the silence, "you like my hair?" It was an unusual compliment to say to a man, but he was flattered none the less.
Before Elena could reply, Rufus yelled, "shut up, you're all giving me a headache and turn the TV off, I want total silence!" Rufus promptly grabbed the remote control and turned the TV off. That, combined with his yelling, sent the remnants into a fit of cries and wails, and the planet responded with a violent storm.
As the world outside threatened to fall apart; the Turks threatened to make Rufus combust with their deadly glares, save for Reno who looked like he was in a great deal of pain.
Rufus growled and stood his ground, "I've had enough of this!" Lightning struck Healin Lodge, making a hole in the ceiling and crashing right into Reno. Elena screamed and lashed onto Tseng, while Rufus fell back in wide eyed, open mouthed shock. The young president saw his life flash before his eyes; his headache had made him foolish enough to disregard the deadly risks of upsetting the silver haired trio, Rufus had simply snapped. "Stop, don't cry!"
Rain and hail fell into Rufus' home through the hole in the roof, while Reno lay motionless on the floor and Elena panicked and nearly chocked Tseng clutching him so hard. "Stop, please!" Rufus begged, "you can keep the TV on, I'm not mad at you, really! Don't cry anymore, I love you, I really do!" Rufus rushed to hug the three crying boys, protecting them from the rain and hail that was flooding the living room and scaring them further.
Finally the boys calmed down enough to actually listen to, and understand, words. They sniffled and pouted, their faces red and their eyes puffy. The hail stopped, the lightning ceased and the rain became light. "You're not mad?" Kadaj finally asked.
"No, I'm not, I'm really not mad, I'm just tired..." Rufus felt his heart slow to a normal rhythm, almost fearing that it would stop beating altogether.
The three silver haired boys nodded, Elena stopped panicking, and Tseng was able to catch his breath, while Rude checked Reno's vital signs. Then, in a massive burst of electricity, Reno woke up, his eyes glowing with lightning reflected on them. "I feel great!" The redhead declared at the top of his lungs, and once again, if only for a moment, all was right in the world.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 28: There is no Calm in this Storm
Some people spoke of the calm before the storm and others of the solemn tranquility after its end; but the few moments of peace in between the waves of furious onslaught of a storm that had no end in sight, were no where near as calming as either of the other two.
Before a storm, if one did not know of it, everything could be at peace with a little ignorant bliss. Some would say it's best to know and be prepared, when preparations are possible, but even then it is natural to hold on to a certain degree of optimism that underestimates what is to come. Then there's the absolute peace after the storm passes. Though it may bring mourning, it's all over.
However, those tiny moments of peace in the middle of a storm, though not long enough to be restful, are vital. They are vital, because the human mind can only take so much chaos before snapping and giving a new meaning to the phrase 'limit break'. Even if it was with great difficulty, Rufus and the Turks did their best to push away their stress and focus on their very important mission during the little time they had that wasn't occupied by panic.
Rufus' breaths were labored and heavy, Tseng's heartbeat was so fast it resembled a buzzing sound, and Elena's face was ghostly pale, as if the blood had evaporated from her body. Rude was apparently nonchalant, but that was only on the surface. The tall, bald Turk seemed to eradiate heat as he stood perfectly still with an unchanging serious expression; he was like a time bomb.
Reno was the one who differed most from the other adults. One could say it was his childish manner, or more likely his jubilant attitude. He was smiling cheerfully, as if all his troubles were long since forgotten. The redhead looked normal enough, save for the flash of blue lightning in his eyes, which he was happily oblivious to.
Rufus sighed gravely, he was about to say something, but his mind was blank from all the disarray he had been subjected to in a single day, and that day wasn't even half over.
Before the young president could come up with anything to say, Reno asked. "Is your hair green?"
Rufus gave Reno an odd stare, which was a mix of annoyance and pity. The redhead must have been affected by the lightning more than it appeared. "There's something wrong with your eyes, my hair is blond, golden."
"Um, sir..." Elena muttered, with worry in her voice. "I kind of... could my eyes also be?" She trailed off.
Tseng caught on to Elena's train of though and confirmed, "I see it too." Then Rude nodded in silent agreement.
"See what?" Rufus finally asked, the remnants had been hugging him and cuddling him the entire time. Rufus had posed no resistance to avoid provoking their destructive cries.
"Daddy's hair really is green!" Kadaj pointed to Rufus' head, while his brothers nodded energetically and pointed as well.
"What's wrong with my hair?" Rufus immediately panicked. He dashed towards the backroom, leaving the remnants behind despite the risk of upsetting them, and stared at his face in the mirror while chanting, "oh no, oh no, oh no!"
The bathroom was luxurious of course, it was a fact that showed, aside from the expensive shiny tiles and the golden lined details, because of the variety of expensive hair products amassed in it.
"Why? Why?" Now it was Rufus' turn to cry.
Rufus was in fact blond, but his hair was a little sensitive so he had to wash it with special shampoo, apply a generous amount of a specific conditioner and use only a certain brand of gel. Rufus knew this, his stylist knew this, but it was otherwise a deep dark secret.
If any strange substance came into contact with Rufus' hair, such as the remnants' earlier breakfast experiments, even if it was washed off, as it had been, there was still a risk that his hair would be affected. Rufus was devastated, his precious shiny blond hair had started to rust into a repulsive shade of green, and it was getting worse.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 29: Hats
Due to the exposure Rufus' hair received to the remnants' breakfast experiment earlier that day, when he fainted after partially consuming it and his head fell in it, plus the stress of a hectic fight for survival during the course of the day, the president's hair had turned green. Rufus stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror at Healin Lodge in horror. Pretty soon, the hints of shiny blond that were left would be completely gone, to be replaced with a moldy shade of green. "Oxygen!" Rufus yelled, "keep the oxygen out of my hair!"
Elena acted fast; apparently exposure to air was bad for Rufus' hair in its current state. In a way, the odd situation was similar to rust, except it was green and it was on his hair. She dashed to the kitchen and brought back a plastic bag, which Rufus put over his head.
"Auntie Elena!" Kadaj called, "I want a hat like daddy's!"
"Me too!" Yazoo added.
"Me three!" Agreed Loz.
"It's not a hat, it's a plastic bag," Elena began to explain, but the other Turks shook their heads urgently. "I mean, sure, I'll get you all hats just like your daddy!" She rushed to the kitchen once more, but much to her dismay, there was only one other plastic bag left. Elena returned with the only bag and gave her fellow Turks a grave look.
Tseng's eyes traveled to Elena's hand where she held the plastic bag and he immediately looked alarmed. The Turk leader's worries increased when the three remnants extended their little arms towards their auntie, each expecting to receive his own plastic bag.
"Supermarket," Rude spoke and the room was filled with a collective sigh from the Turks; Rufus was too busy holding back tears.
"Right, the supermarket, we're going to get more plastic bags, I mean hats, so don't worry. You won't cry, right?" Elena smiled hopefully and nervously.
The three little boys looked at Elena, then at each other, then at the plastic bag and they let out a unanimous battle cry, "mine!" Healin Lodge became a battle field for the three miniature silver haired warriors, as they fought for the plastic bag. They all wanted to wear the hat that matched their father's. The inevitable happened and the fierce tug of war caused the fragile plastic bag to be torn into three pieces, cue massive amounts of crying.
"Everyone listen to me!" Before the storm clouds even had a chance to gather above Healin Lodge, Rufus' voice silenced everyone. "Kadaj, Yazoo, Loz, there's no need for you to cry. You will all get your plastic bags and even bubble wrap to play with." Rufus knew how much kids loved bubble wrap, even he used to like it as a child. "But you have to be good and patient, your uncle Reno will take you to the supermarket and buy you some bags, I mean hats, and cookies too. Daddy has to take care of some business, be good and I'll be proud of you. I'll see you later today."
The three silver haired boys nodded vigorously with a unanimous cheerful, "we will!" It looked like Rufus was finally starting to take control of the situation, even if he still looked like he was going to cry.
"Reno, I don't know what's going on with you, but I don't want weird stuff happening near me right now, this is an emergency. Rude, ready the chopper; Tseng and Elena, pack my hair products and get ready to perform emergency first aid on the way to the salon," Rufus commanded.
Tseng wasn't comfortable with leaving Reno alone in charge of babysitting the three terrors. "Sir, I think it will be better if-"
"Silence, I need both you and Elena with me, Rude has to pilot and Reno is the one with the strange things happening to him, so it's best that I don't bring him along this time." The remnants didn't understand what that was all about, but as long as they got their hats they would be happy, besides, they had to behave to make daddy proud.
"Sir," Elena began to protest as well.
Rufus raised his hand in a sing for silence, "there will be no more arguments, you are Turks; you should know where your loyalties lie."
The four Turks nodded, "yes sir," there would be no arguing or reasoning with Rufus while his precious hair was in a state of emergency.
So it was done, Rude piloted the helicopter while Tseng and Elena applied hair products to Rufus and massaged his hair and scalp, sticking their hands uncomfortably under the plastic bag to avoid further damage to his hair by exposure to air.
Meanwhile, Reno was left with the task to drive the three remnants to the supermarket and somehow prevent the place from ending up in ruins.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 30: Peaceful Supermarket
Reno wondered if Rufus would yell at him for not insisting on the remnants wearing seatbelts, or if he wouldn't really care. Of course, in his current state, he only had room to think about his hair, but Reno briefly wondered how it would be if Rufus was in a normal state. The thought vanished as soon as it came and Reno focused on the road.
The three silver haired boys had not given him any trouble so far. They happily got in the car, all three cramming into the front seat, successfully resolving the argument about who would ride in front before it even started. They were very amused by the sound of sirens and the cars with the blue lights chasing after Reno, who tried to lose the cops in the highway.
Reno glanced at the three boys for a split second, then looked back to the road, making a sharp turn. The remnants bounced in their seats, on purpose because of their amusement and abundant energy, or because of the car's movements, Reno didn't know, maybe it was both. He was at least glad they were entertained enough not to cause him any trouble.
The fast, shiny black car, which looked like something out of a spy movie and was secretly armed as such, easily lost the police cars chasing it, outrunning them with a wide margin. Reno drove around the highway and made his way to the supermarket. He was lucky to find a good parking spot near the entrance and rushed to it, coming to a sudden halt. He stretched his right arm over the passenger seat, just on time to catch the three boys and stop them from colliding with the dash, but the remnants only giggled, still amused by the ride.
"We're here," Reno exited the car and the remnants followed him happily. The four entered the supermarket, ignoring the shocked looks of the people who had seen their arrival in the parking lot.
Inside the supermarket, a variety of aisles stood before them, Reno knew he needed plastic bags and cookies. He might as well pick up a few other things, he had his Turk credit card funded by Shinra and this was technically a mission so Rufus wouldn't complain about anything that Reno claimed was purchased to keep the boys under control. He would make the best of it and stuck up on snacks to last a while.
Reno intended to buy a lot of things, so he grabbed a shopping cart and made a bee line for the snack aisle, with the three boys following him, watching the variety of the supermarket in amazement. They reached the aisle where the cookies were kept and the remnants' eyes lit up.
"I want that one!" The three boys each pointed at a different cookie box.
It looked like they would argue, but Reno quickly stopped them, "we'll get all three." The redhead watched the boys' expression cheer up, then fall into a look of thoughtfulness. "We'll get three of each kind."
The remnants smiled again and nodded energetically. "We'll help!" Each started to pile three of each type of cookies into the shopping cart, while Reno went to get the plastic bags and tossed them in the cart.
Reno continued to watch the remnants and grinned to himself, "I'm a genius," this way the remnants would be satisfied by the selection of cookies, even if they changed their minds about what they wanted and they wouldn't have to share. Everything was going surprisingly smooth. The remnants were happy, Reno was relaxed; everything was perfect.
"There they are!" The perfection melted away, giving way to the prospect of chaos, when Cloud pointed at Reno and the boys from the opposite end of the aisle. Tifa, Marlene and Denzel were with him, shopping for groceries and they all curiously approached.
End of Memory III
Disclaimer, I don't own Final Fantasy VII or Powerpuff Girls Z. Darla is my original character. There is a reference to Final Fantasy Tactics Advance in Incident 26. Special thanks to sareyva for giving me the idea to elaborate on the topic of the trust that was lost during the haircut incidents on Incident 22. Incidents 28 and 29 were inspired by Silver Horror asking about Rufus' real hair color.
Incident 21: Taking Turns
Rude managed to give Yazoo a haircut without any major troublesome incidents occurring, though it was only a small haircut, a mere two inches. Then of course, Rufus had to keep his word and wash Yazoo's hair, and while this was being done, Kadaj frowned. "How come daddy didn't wash my hair?"
Rufus was getting tired of all of this. Washing someone's hair was harder than it looked. Though ironically, he could spend hours washing his own. "Alright, I'll wash it again," Rufus grumbled.
"How come you're only washing my hair once?" Yazoo complained.
Rufus mentally counted to ten, "because that's all it takes for it to be clean, and Kadaj I'll wash your hair next time."
"Why not now?" Kadaj whined.
"Because it's already clean," it was logical, Rufus thought, but those three boys knew nothing about logic. Then Loz started wailing full force, causing Rufus and the Turks to jump in surprise. "Loz, what's wrong?"
"I'm not getting any attention at all!" Loz cried.
"I'll wash your hair too when I'm done with Yazoo," Rufus offered.
But that wasn't quite enough for little Loz, "how come I have to go last? Am I your least favorite?"
Rufus's teeth were clenched, his eyes were twitching and he was forcing himself to smile, resulting in the creepiest expression the Turks ever saw; but nobody cared as long as it was somewhat of a smile. "You'll be the first next time."
"I want to be the first! If I have to wait until next time for you to wash my hair, then I should be first!" Kadaj stomped his feet.
"What about me? I was second today and I have to be second again the next time?" Yazoo complained.
"I want to be first!" Loz added.
"Stop it! Stop arguing!" Rufus yelled at the top of his lungs.
Then the three remnants grimaced in a chorus, "am I your least favorite?"
Rufus looked at the Turks searching for help, they had been awfully quiet letting him handle the situation and the young president didn't like it at all. Tseng opened his mouth to say something, thought better of it and closed it again. Rude remained as quiet as he always was and Elena looked like she was in deep thought.
After the long pause, Reno spoke, "I think," and four hands belonging to Rufus, Tseng, Rude and Elena were simultaneously thrown over his mouth. When Reno started a sentence with 'I think' it usually meant trouble, because everyone knows that's a lie.
After Reno was silenced and some more careful thinking was put into the dangerous situation, Elena proposed a solution. "Next time, you can take a bath and have your hair washed in the pool at the same time."
"But I want to be first!" The remnants complained in unison.
"You will all be first," Elena assured.
Finally, the rain that had started up outside ceased, the wind that was beginning to pick up died down and Reno's random aches and pain stopped, indicating that a good enough consensus had been reached with the three remnants.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 22: Training
After the haircut ordeal was over, instead of being thankful he survived and keeping a low profile for at least the rest of the day, Rufus wasn't satisfied. "We're going to see the designer."
"No!" Reno wailed in agony. He hated Darla and the way she always criticized him for being sloppy and making the Turk suit she designed look 'cheap'.
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I agree with Reno," Elena spoke the words she never thought would come out of her mouth. Though Darla had nothing to say about Elena's attire, she always went out of her way to compliment Tseng and Elena didn't like that at all.
Rude remained silent as usual and Tseng decided that it was in his best interest to remain silent even if he was very surprised by Elena's statement. Then Rufus pouted and declared, "we're going!"
The remnants looked unsure. Their father wanted to go see this person for a reason that was unknown to them, but both uncle Reno and aunt Elena seemed to dislike this designer their father spoke of. Normally, they would trust their daddy's choices, but after the haircut disaster they weren't so sure. Unfortunately the logic of he remnants would turn out to be very difficult and inconvenient for Rufus and the Turks to deal with, when it doubt, cry. Thus the silver haired trio began to cry and once again the skies turned dark, rain began to pour and wind started to blow.
"What's wrong now?" Rufus asked exasperated.
"You're not protecting us, you're letting mean people hurt us!" Kadaj yelled; eyes filled with tears, cheeks red from crying, his expression matched that of his brothers.
"What are you talking about? You three are the dangerous ones!" Rufus was telling the truth, but it was a truth that should not be spoken.
Tseng was seriously starting to consider finding a way to cast a permanent spell of silence on Rufus. Sure his paycheck would be in danger, but the Turk leader reasoned that he would have no use for gil if he was killed in action before the next payday. If only everyone would learn that following Rude's example was a good idea. Tseng came to truly admire Rude's superb survival skills.
However, the bald Turk wasn't completely mute, he remained quiet most of the time but he spoke when he needed to speak, saying only what needed to be said, "training."
The cries of the three sons of Jenova came to an abrupt halt, as did the bad weather and Reno's sickly sensation. "Training," the three silver haired boys whispered in unison.
"Daddy is training us to be strong like our big brother Sephiroth..." Kadaj reasoned, "I knew that!" Thus the emergency was solved with a single word from Rude; it was all about knowing what to say and when to say it.
But of course, the chorus of "no you didn't," from Yazoo and Loz, followed by "yes I did," from Kadaj, soon filled the air. At least they weren't crying.
Rufus massaged his temples and shook his head. "Designer now, and then we're going home." Rufus really needed to rest, but he couldn't be associated as the father of three boys who were not up to date with the latest fashions. After all, vanity was a high priority for Rufus Shinra.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 23: Fashion Criminal
"What darling children!" Darla squealed at the top of her lungs. Though she was a well known professional designer and the clothes she made and sold were always exquisitely elegant, the clothes she designed to wear herself more often than not looked awful. It was a strange ironic contradiction that no one understood. Though for anyone else wearing stripes and spots was a capital sin, she wore them all the time and it was perfectly fine.
Every time Rufus saw the designer he wondered how such an eyesore could make him look so good. Today Darla's outfit consisted of a chocobo yellow shirt with cotton candy pink vertical stripes, a lime green skirt with red polka dots, which was cut diagonally making it knee length on the left side and ankle length on the right side. Her shoes were purple with an overload of royal blue glitters, her earrings were tribal style wooden hoops and she had a delicate golden tiara with pearl decorations as a diadem.
Darla's hair was also a fashion crime, it tried to be blond but in the end it was a strange mossy green. Distracted as she was, she must have forgotten one of her contact lenses and she saw the world with one brown eye and a silver one.
Yet somewhere, underneath that catastrophe that Darla dared to call an outfit, a perfect model body was hidden. It was a fact that became apparent when she wore decent clothes, fixed the color of her hair and didn't get her contact lenses mixed up. Why didn't she look like that all the time? Nobody knew. Maybe she was insane; but insane or not, she was still considered a fashion genius.
"Tseng you look wonderfully handsome today!" Darla complimented the Turk leader who unconsciously backed away, while Elena glared daggers at Darla but said nothing.
Elena couldn't believe herself getting jealous of that insane train wreck, even if she could be beautiful when she tried.
Then Darla gave Reno a disapproving look, "sloppy, terribly sloppy, you look awful!" She shook her head disapprovingly in an exaggerated way, flipping her long hair from side to side.
"Who cares," Reno stuck out his tongue, "the fan girls think I'm hot so there!" He pouted and tried to ignore Darla's annoying precense for the rest of the visit.
"Hmp!" Darla threw her head back, ignored Elena and Rude, and turned her attention to Rufus and the children. "Tell me darling, are these lovely children related to you?" She batted her long fake black eye lashes at Rufus and smiled, teeth painted maroon from her lipstick.
"Yes," Rufus declared with more pride than the Turks would ever expect. "They're my sons, Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz."
While the Turks, Reno included, were shocked to silence, Darla squealed happily. "Come my three little darlings, come to Darla!"
Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz had looked rather nervous from the start, but they tried to keep their cool and be brave for daddy. However, this was too much. Training or not, they knew they weren't ready to handle this. "No clown!" The three remnants screamed and ran outside crying.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 24: Big Brother Black Sheep
The screech of tires was heard as Fenrir came to a sudden halt in the street outside Darla's fashion designing studio. "Watch where you're... going?" Cloud couldn't believe his eyes. His heart was pounding fast enough because he almost ran over three kids who dashed into the road unexpectedly, and he nearly went into cardiac arrest when he took a better look at the three boys.
"Big Brother Black Sheep!" As the remnants yelled out to Cloud, the ground shook, extending the cracks that had formed on the road due to the recent series of earthquakes and crazy weather. Light rain fell, and the three remnants and Cloud were soaked as the kids hopped on their big brother's lap, trying to sit there together despite there hardly being enough for three children.
Cloud was shocked, to say the least. The weather had been positively insane, but even so he braved the random storms to deliver packages, however the journeys had not been easy. Now he was starting to suspect that maybe Sephiroth was behind all this and maybe that's why he found three little kids who looked like younger versions of Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz. "Seph... Sephiroth..." Cloud whispered the name as if he dared not say it aloud for fear of the legendary First Class Solder appearing before him as if being summoned.
"I wish Big Brother Sephiroth was here too," Kadaj agreed, accompanied by the nods of Yazoo and Loz. Although their silver haired older brother, mother's favorite, wasn't around to protect them, Big Brother Black Sheep, also known as Cloud Strife, turned out to be enough to calm them.
"You'll protect us from the clown, right?" Loz asked with hope in his teary eyes.
"Clown?" As if finding three boys who looked so much like the remnants of his rival wasn't strange enough, now those same boys were asking to be protected from a clown.
"She's in there," Yazoo pointed at Darla's studio, in front of which Rufus and the Turks stood in shock as they witnessed the scene.
"I... ah... Strife... Go!" Rufus stumbled on his words before finally sending the Turks into action.
With the rain gone along with the tears, Reno had another quick recovery from his pains and joined Tseng, Elena and Rude in the mission of recovering the remnants before Cloud caused any trouble. Or at least they assumed that's what Rufus was asking them to do by telling them to 'go'.
"We'll take them back to their father now," Tseng spoke with complete seriousness, despite having to look at the strangest, most confused expression he had ever seen upon Cloud Strife's face.
"Come children, daddy's waiting for you," Elena smiled sweetly, Rude nodded reassuringly and Reno tried to hold back his laughter.
Rufus was not happy, he was not happy at all, and when Rufus was not happy, the Turks were in trouble. But that would have to wait until later, because the young president had a strong feeling that it would be very troublesome if he lost the trust of the remnants and they turned to Cloud for protection. "It's okay; daddy won't let the mean clown lady hurt you, let's go home now."
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 25: Excuses
Cloud Strife had not lived an easy life. Though there was a time when he feared he would be an ordinary country boy forever, lately there were times when he wished he had remained a simple country boy. The illusionary Soldier First Class turned delivery boy, had seen many shocking things in his life. He saw a legendary hero become insane and burn down his home town, he watched as his long time crush endured hardship and got tangled up in his confusion, and he witnessed many dear friends pass on to the life stream.
All of those things were surprising and unnerving, many of those events even being classified as traumatic. But it all fell short of the pure shock that Cloud was feeling right now. He was in fact less surprised when he admitted he was the master of his own illusionary world in comparison to what he was seeing now.
"Ru... Rufus..." The name was pushed out with more effort that it should require. "Shinra..." Cloud's mako glowing eyes were wide, his jaw hanging open after uttering those two words. Did his eyes deceive him? Was this all a dream? Or could it be that Rufus was indeed the father, adoptive Cloud assumed, of three little boys who looked too much like Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz?
The three little boys looked at their big brother then back at their father. Finally, Kadaj, the leader for whom Yazoo and Loz were waiting to make a choice, nodded and went back to Rufus followed by his brothers. Cloud continued to stare, taking a moment to rub his eyes and shake his head, still having some difficulty believing that this wasn't a dream. Then, after the obligatory father and sons hug, Rufus glared at Cloud and at the Turks, before walking off with the remnants towards the helicopter. Tseng, Elena, Reno and Rude followed the young president turned unwilling father, leaving Cloud without a much needed explanation.
"Wait!" Cloud called after the group. "What's this about? Are those really the remnants of Sephiroth?" At this point he gripped his sword, "if so then..."
Elena looked at Cloud disapprovingly, "could you really? They're just children."
"But they're dangerous..." and yet so small that Cloud could hardly see them as a threat and had to convince himself they were, though they were indeed far more deadly than he imagined. "I don't know what you're up to, but I won't allow it."
"Alright, enough jokes," Rufus decided it was time to interfere. "Just because they look like the remnants doesn't mean they are."
"But they mentioned Sephiroth," Cloud argued.
"It's from that children's book," Rufus tried to explain.
Cloud had seen the aforementioned book back in Nibelheim years ago, when Sephiroth was still a legendary hero. It was one of those 'be good' educational books with pictures of 'big brother Sephiroth', the hero whom so many people admired. "That's not even being printed anymore, is it?" Cloud doubted they had Sephiroth's permission to print it in the first place anyway.
"I have a copy," Rufus replied. The remnants remained oblivious as to what was happening, assuming they should just ignore the grown up talk they didn't understand. Then Rufus made a shocking revelation, which was obviously a lie, but still made him shudder. "They are my children, they just look like their mother, that's all."
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 26: Hair
Though it wasn't all that late, Rufus and the Turks were already exhausted. The trip back to Healin Lodge went by relatively uneventful after they managed to get away from a shocked Cloud Strife. Rufus wished for nothing more than some peace and quiet. The young president collapsed into a luxurious chair in the living room, while the remnants watched cartoons in the high-tech big screen TV.
"I don't know if I should ask," Elena began, "but I'm curious," the way her sentence started could only indicate the coming of an unwanted question. "Reno, why is it that Rude cuts your hair?" The fact had been made known at some point among the chaos of the day and Elena wanted more information, just for the sake of knowing, to satisfy her natural curiosity.
"Because," Reno obviously avoided the question.
Elena then directed her curious gaze towards Rude, "why?"
Rude merely nodded as if repeating Reno's answer in a silent form. There was a pause during which Elena insisted with her eyes and Rude finally shrugged.
A moment of silence went by and Tseng became curious, "what is the real reason?"
"No reason," Reno pouted, he didn't like where the conversation was going.
"Did you have a traumatic experience in a hair salon?" Elena inquired.
"Looks like the kids like the Powerpuff Girls Z," Reno abruptly changed the subject and on cue the tree silver haired boys blushed.
"Girls have cooties!" Kadaj pouted. "All girls do, except auntie Elena and Blossom," he blushed at the mention of the pink puff's name.
"Bubbles doesn't have cooties either, she's cute," Yazoo defended.
"I like Buttercup," Loz shyly added.
A few more minutes passed with the discussion of the Powerpuff Girls Z and which was the cutest. Then another moment of silence settled in when the final battle of the episode came on and the remnants were too busy watching to continue the conversation.
Finally, the topic of Reno's hair came to light again. "Reno, about your hair," Elena insisted.
"Just leave my hair alone!" Reno really didn't want to talk about it.
Tseng raised an eyebrow suspiciously. "Why are you getting defensive?"
"I'm not!" Reno continued to pout childishly.
Elena wanted to ask if Reno actually glued a wig to his head and only pretended to get haircuts, with Rude as the only person to know the truth. Reno would only tell him since they were best friends and Rude was bald so he would understand. But to avoid possibly offending Rude, who wouldn't have been offended anyway but Elena could sometimes be self conscious about what she said, thus avoided suggesting the possibility of Reno being bald. However, she would still continue her curious inquiry in a relatively less sensitive direction. "Is it that your hair isn't really red?"
"It is red!" Reno tried to defend his hair, but the argument wasn't very convincing given his avoidance of the subject.
"Is it blond?" Elena continued asking.
"It's red!" Reno insisted.
"Is it white? Are you embarrassed to have white hair at such a young age so you dye it red? You shouldn't be embarrassed, I once heard a legend about these rabbit people called viera, and having white hair was an honor for them. Of course that's just a legend and having white hair at your age would be very odd. Silver is fine, but white? Still, there's no need to hide it, you can trust us with your secret; we won't tell anyone." Elena's ramblings were not helping Reno feel any better.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 27: Temper, Temper
Fed up with everything, Reno finally admitted the truth about why Rude cut his hair. "It's because my hair is too bright and shiny and if I go get a haircut they always ask me a billion questions about how I keep it this way. They won't believe me when I say I don't do anything special and keep asking for my 'secret' over and over. It's so annoying! And, and… when I was a little kid they would always call me Cutie Carrot-top!"
After a moment of silence, Elena finally nodded, "well, I guess your hair is kind of pretty, but you never brush it. Really Reno, you should take better care of your appearance. I like Tseng's hair best; it's so long and soft." Elena blushed realizing what she was saying, and soon after quieted.
Then it was up to Tseng to fill the silence, "you like my hair?" It was an unusual compliment to say to a man, but he was flattered none the less.
Before Elena could reply, Rufus yelled, "shut up, you're all giving me a headache and turn the TV off, I want total silence!" Rufus promptly grabbed the remote control and turned the TV off. That, combined with his yelling, sent the remnants into a fit of cries and wails, and the planet responded with a violent storm.
As the world outside threatened to fall apart; the Turks threatened to make Rufus combust with their deadly glares, save for Reno who looked like he was in a great deal of pain.
Rufus growled and stood his ground, "I've had enough of this!" Lightning struck Healin Lodge, making a hole in the ceiling and crashing right into Reno. Elena screamed and lashed onto Tseng, while Rufus fell back in wide eyed, open mouthed shock. The young president saw his life flash before his eyes; his headache had made him foolish enough to disregard the deadly risks of upsetting the silver haired trio, Rufus had simply snapped. "Stop, don't cry!"
Rain and hail fell into Rufus' home through the hole in the roof, while Reno lay motionless on the floor and Elena panicked and nearly chocked Tseng clutching him so hard. "Stop, please!" Rufus begged, "you can keep the TV on, I'm not mad at you, really! Don't cry anymore, I love you, I really do!" Rufus rushed to hug the three crying boys, protecting them from the rain and hail that was flooding the living room and scaring them further.
Finally the boys calmed down enough to actually listen to, and understand, words. They sniffled and pouted, their faces red and their eyes puffy. The hail stopped, the lightning ceased and the rain became light. "You're not mad?" Kadaj finally asked.
"No, I'm not, I'm really not mad, I'm just tired..." Rufus felt his heart slow to a normal rhythm, almost fearing that it would stop beating altogether.
The three silver haired boys nodded, Elena stopped panicking, and Tseng was able to catch his breath, while Rude checked Reno's vital signs. Then, in a massive burst of electricity, Reno woke up, his eyes glowing with lightning reflected on them. "I feel great!" The redhead declared at the top of his lungs, and once again, if only for a moment, all was right in the world.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 28: There is no Calm in this Storm
Some people spoke of the calm before the storm and others of the solemn tranquility after its end; but the few moments of peace in between the waves of furious onslaught of a storm that had no end in sight, were no where near as calming as either of the other two.
Before a storm, if one did not know of it, everything could be at peace with a little ignorant bliss. Some would say it's best to know and be prepared, when preparations are possible, but even then it is natural to hold on to a certain degree of optimism that underestimates what is to come. Then there's the absolute peace after the storm passes. Though it may bring mourning, it's all over.
However, those tiny moments of peace in the middle of a storm, though not long enough to be restful, are vital. They are vital, because the human mind can only take so much chaos before snapping and giving a new meaning to the phrase 'limit break'. Even if it was with great difficulty, Rufus and the Turks did their best to push away their stress and focus on their very important mission during the little time they had that wasn't occupied by panic.
Rufus' breaths were labored and heavy, Tseng's heartbeat was so fast it resembled a buzzing sound, and Elena's face was ghostly pale, as if the blood had evaporated from her body. Rude was apparently nonchalant, but that was only on the surface. The tall, bald Turk seemed to eradiate heat as he stood perfectly still with an unchanging serious expression; he was like a time bomb.
Reno was the one who differed most from the other adults. One could say it was his childish manner, or more likely his jubilant attitude. He was smiling cheerfully, as if all his troubles were long since forgotten. The redhead looked normal enough, save for the flash of blue lightning in his eyes, which he was happily oblivious to.
Rufus sighed gravely, he was about to say something, but his mind was blank from all the disarray he had been subjected to in a single day, and that day wasn't even half over.
Before the young president could come up with anything to say, Reno asked. "Is your hair green?"
Rufus gave Reno an odd stare, which was a mix of annoyance and pity. The redhead must have been affected by the lightning more than it appeared. "There's something wrong with your eyes, my hair is blond, golden."
"Um, sir..." Elena muttered, with worry in her voice. "I kind of... could my eyes also be?" She trailed off.
Tseng caught on to Elena's train of though and confirmed, "I see it too." Then Rude nodded in silent agreement.
"See what?" Rufus finally asked, the remnants had been hugging him and cuddling him the entire time. Rufus had posed no resistance to avoid provoking their destructive cries.
"Daddy's hair really is green!" Kadaj pointed to Rufus' head, while his brothers nodded energetically and pointed as well.
"What's wrong with my hair?" Rufus immediately panicked. He dashed towards the backroom, leaving the remnants behind despite the risk of upsetting them, and stared at his face in the mirror while chanting, "oh no, oh no, oh no!"
The bathroom was luxurious of course, it was a fact that showed, aside from the expensive shiny tiles and the golden lined details, because of the variety of expensive hair products amassed in it.
"Why? Why?" Now it was Rufus' turn to cry.
Rufus was in fact blond, but his hair was a little sensitive so he had to wash it with special shampoo, apply a generous amount of a specific conditioner and use only a certain brand of gel. Rufus knew this, his stylist knew this, but it was otherwise a deep dark secret.
If any strange substance came into contact with Rufus' hair, such as the remnants' earlier breakfast experiments, even if it was washed off, as it had been, there was still a risk that his hair would be affected. Rufus was devastated, his precious shiny blond hair had started to rust into a repulsive shade of green, and it was getting worse.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 29: Hats
Due to the exposure Rufus' hair received to the remnants' breakfast experiment earlier that day, when he fainted after partially consuming it and his head fell in it, plus the stress of a hectic fight for survival during the course of the day, the president's hair had turned green. Rufus stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror at Healin Lodge in horror. Pretty soon, the hints of shiny blond that were left would be completely gone, to be replaced with a moldy shade of green. "Oxygen!" Rufus yelled, "keep the oxygen out of my hair!"
Elena acted fast; apparently exposure to air was bad for Rufus' hair in its current state. In a way, the odd situation was similar to rust, except it was green and it was on his hair. She dashed to the kitchen and brought back a plastic bag, which Rufus put over his head.
"Auntie Elena!" Kadaj called, "I want a hat like daddy's!"
"Me too!" Yazoo added.
"Me three!" Agreed Loz.
"It's not a hat, it's a plastic bag," Elena began to explain, but the other Turks shook their heads urgently. "I mean, sure, I'll get you all hats just like your daddy!" She rushed to the kitchen once more, but much to her dismay, there was only one other plastic bag left. Elena returned with the only bag and gave her fellow Turks a grave look.
Tseng's eyes traveled to Elena's hand where she held the plastic bag and he immediately looked alarmed. The Turk leader's worries increased when the three remnants extended their little arms towards their auntie, each expecting to receive his own plastic bag.
"Supermarket," Rude spoke and the room was filled with a collective sigh from the Turks; Rufus was too busy holding back tears.
"Right, the supermarket, we're going to get more plastic bags, I mean hats, so don't worry. You won't cry, right?" Elena smiled hopefully and nervously.
The three little boys looked at Elena, then at each other, then at the plastic bag and they let out a unanimous battle cry, "mine!" Healin Lodge became a battle field for the three miniature silver haired warriors, as they fought for the plastic bag. They all wanted to wear the hat that matched their father's. The inevitable happened and the fierce tug of war caused the fragile plastic bag to be torn into three pieces, cue massive amounts of crying.
"Everyone listen to me!" Before the storm clouds even had a chance to gather above Healin Lodge, Rufus' voice silenced everyone. "Kadaj, Yazoo, Loz, there's no need for you to cry. You will all get your plastic bags and even bubble wrap to play with." Rufus knew how much kids loved bubble wrap, even he used to like it as a child. "But you have to be good and patient, your uncle Reno will take you to the supermarket and buy you some bags, I mean hats, and cookies too. Daddy has to take care of some business, be good and I'll be proud of you. I'll see you later today."
The three silver haired boys nodded vigorously with a unanimous cheerful, "we will!" It looked like Rufus was finally starting to take control of the situation, even if he still looked like he was going to cry.
"Reno, I don't know what's going on with you, but I don't want weird stuff happening near me right now, this is an emergency. Rude, ready the chopper; Tseng and Elena, pack my hair products and get ready to perform emergency first aid on the way to the salon," Rufus commanded.
Tseng wasn't comfortable with leaving Reno alone in charge of babysitting the three terrors. "Sir, I think it will be better if-"
"Silence, I need both you and Elena with me, Rude has to pilot and Reno is the one with the strange things happening to him, so it's best that I don't bring him along this time." The remnants didn't understand what that was all about, but as long as they got their hats they would be happy, besides, they had to behave to make daddy proud.
"Sir," Elena began to protest as well.
Rufus raised his hand in a sing for silence, "there will be no more arguments, you are Turks; you should know where your loyalties lie."
The four Turks nodded, "yes sir," there would be no arguing or reasoning with Rufus while his precious hair was in a state of emergency.
So it was done, Rude piloted the helicopter while Tseng and Elena applied hair products to Rufus and massaged his hair and scalp, sticking their hands uncomfortably under the plastic bag to avoid further damage to his hair by exposure to air.
Meanwhile, Reno was left with the task to drive the three remnants to the supermarket and somehow prevent the place from ending up in ruins.
xoxox xox xoxox
Incident 30: Peaceful Supermarket
Reno wondered if Rufus would yell at him for not insisting on the remnants wearing seatbelts, or if he wouldn't really care. Of course, in his current state, he only had room to think about his hair, but Reno briefly wondered how it would be if Rufus was in a normal state. The thought vanished as soon as it came and Reno focused on the road.
The three silver haired boys had not given him any trouble so far. They happily got in the car, all three cramming into the front seat, successfully resolving the argument about who would ride in front before it even started. They were very amused by the sound of sirens and the cars with the blue lights chasing after Reno, who tried to lose the cops in the highway.
Reno glanced at the three boys for a split second, then looked back to the road, making a sharp turn. The remnants bounced in their seats, on purpose because of their amusement and abundant energy, or because of the car's movements, Reno didn't know, maybe it was both. He was at least glad they were entertained enough not to cause him any trouble.
The fast, shiny black car, which looked like something out of a spy movie and was secretly armed as such, easily lost the police cars chasing it, outrunning them with a wide margin. Reno drove around the highway and made his way to the supermarket. He was lucky to find a good parking spot near the entrance and rushed to it, coming to a sudden halt. He stretched his right arm over the passenger seat, just on time to catch the three boys and stop them from colliding with the dash, but the remnants only giggled, still amused by the ride.
"We're here," Reno exited the car and the remnants followed him happily. The four entered the supermarket, ignoring the shocked looks of the people who had seen their arrival in the parking lot.
Inside the supermarket, a variety of aisles stood before them, Reno knew he needed plastic bags and cookies. He might as well pick up a few other things, he had his Turk credit card funded by Shinra and this was technically a mission so Rufus wouldn't complain about anything that Reno claimed was purchased to keep the boys under control. He would make the best of it and stuck up on snacks to last a while.
Reno intended to buy a lot of things, so he grabbed a shopping cart and made a bee line for the snack aisle, with the three boys following him, watching the variety of the supermarket in amazement. They reached the aisle where the cookies were kept and the remnants' eyes lit up.
"I want that one!" The three boys each pointed at a different cookie box.
It looked like they would argue, but Reno quickly stopped them, "we'll get all three." The redhead watched the boys' expression cheer up, then fall into a look of thoughtfulness. "We'll get three of each kind."
The remnants smiled again and nodded energetically. "We'll help!" Each started to pile three of each type of cookies into the shopping cart, while Reno went to get the plastic bags and tossed them in the cart.
Reno continued to watch the remnants and grinned to himself, "I'm a genius," this way the remnants would be satisfied by the selection of cookies, even if they changed their minds about what they wanted and they wouldn't have to share. Everything was going surprisingly smooth. The remnants were happy, Reno was relaxed; everything was perfect.
"There they are!" The perfection melted away, giving way to the prospect of chaos, when Cloud pointed at Reno and the boys from the opposite end of the aisle. Tifa, Marlene and Denzel were with him, shopping for groceries and they all curiously approached.
End of Memory III
Disclaimer, I don't own Final Fantasy VII or Powerpuff Girls Z. Darla is my original character. There is a reference to Final Fantasy Tactics Advance in Incident 26. Special thanks to sareyva for giving me the idea to elaborate on the topic of the trust that was lost during the haircut incidents on Incident 22. Incidents 28 and 29 were inspired by Silver Horror asking about Rufus' real hair color.