Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ When I Faltered ❯ Chapter 5 ( Chapter 5 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

 

Disclaimer: Don't own it.

 

Chapter Five:

 

Ever the ivory butterfly, she blinked for good measure in the mirror. She had been reminded of the King and Queen, their five year old daughter in attendance as well.

 

It had been Cid's smile alone that put her mind at ease when the attendants reprimanded and instructed her to be mindful of the Rulers, forgetting that it was her wedding day.

 

Spidery lace were her fingers as they clasped onto her intended's own, a playful smirk tickling the edges of Cid's mouth when she spoke her vows. His own promises were spoken quite eloquently with a secret hand at her ribs that purposefully tickled. She had almost laughed before she slyly stepped on his foot discreetly, the two looking at one another with silly smiles on their faces.

 

Dutifully, she had played her part. The pride swelled in her chest at her careful grace and her joyous union to her husband (although his current consumption of the drink was getting the better of him).

 

Merely sixteen, yet her mind was calm and calculating. She knew right from wrong, reasonable from absurd. Cid had made habit to call her ' The Little Woman, ' always laughing when she bristled, causing her to laugh in turn.

 

When dusk had sighed into night, she was taken to a spacious room filled with several ladies. They gave knowing smiles and flushing advice about her intended intimate events for the night. She was dressed in a sheer and ever-wistful gown that would have beckoned the longings of any man who had view of her state. Her hair had been brushed with almond and honey-spice, small wavelets of golden tresses falling feather-like on her shoulders.

 

The woman lit candles and blew kisses before they left the golden-gilded room and she waited nervously upon the bed. And waited.

 

And waited.

 

Quite the embarrassment for the Lady of Lindblum when Regent Cid Fabool was found naked in the arms of another the morning after…

 

'Were you made up in white? The silk virgin? '

 

Amusement flickered within his eyes. His fingers danced about in the air, a habit she noticed whenever he was excited.

 

She couldn't help but laugh at his child-like behaviour. They were sitting down on the floor outside like small children, the wind tossing their hair.

 

' Well? 'A raise of a silver eyebrow sent her to an immediate answer despite the impatient pout that was beginning to work on his lips.

 

'Yes, I was. '

 

His eyes became slightly lidded, a languid smile added to his mouth, ' And the wedding night? '

 

She didn't hesitate nor still at the question. These few months had taught her to never be off guard. Kuja prodded with no regard to feelings. His goal was for knowledge and curiosity despite what others would feel. And after all, she was his prisoner. His social eloquence was not needed for her benefit although he didn't waver much from giving it.

 

She knew his thoughts centred on perverted and private details; however, it never failed to amuse her to surprise him.

 

' Alone. Cid consummated our marriage with another woman. ' Kuja noticed a bitter smirk upon her lips, one he doubted she was aware of. She had expected to surprise him, but rather, she had ignited a small fury within the mage.

 

'It seems...almost fitting, really, ' he whispered slightly, looking toward the horizon in the distance off the airship. He turned to her, a twisted smile etched about his face, ' But what truly amazes me is you, pretty Hilda. '

 

Her breath caught in her throat as she met his gaze full on, clouded with something she was having trouble to name, ' Through our very first discussions, I had deducted you were not as stupid, ' in which he said the word quite harshly, ' as I had originally thought. For what could anyone think of a woman who smiles at her husbands discretions with a mere comment of 'oops!' '

 

His gaze was intent upon her stunned face, his voice turning sing-song, ' I know a woman who disregards hurt in favour of appropriateness. I know a woman who keeps me interested in wit for hours yet can easily dismiss her own humiliation in favour of grace. You don't love him, 'it was here his smile disappeared in favour of a reprimanding tone, 'It's dead and I've learnt that you cannot bring dead things back to life. It's not ignorance I speak of but your stupidity. If you were truly intelligent you would have recognized during the first affair that there would only be repeats. It was your wedding night. And you forgavehim. And every time after that, what did the pretty lady do? Is your love so moving or was it the public face that demanded so? 'Now it seemed as if he was mocking her, but what she saw in his eyes made her heart clench in regret.

 

Pity.

 

He pitied her. A look she had always known and never recognized. She could have sworn bile was rising in her throat, she was so disgusted. She didn't want pity. Yet it was his that made something snap within her self-respect.

 

Kuja was a symbol of strength, a challenge in wit, and an equal. However, she didn't notice until now that the scale had always been tipped. He felt sorry for her.

 

He stood silent as he watched her. No response emitted from her mouth. Her eyes were wide, not registering the tears coursing down her face, her body slightly trembling. Her knees gave under, causing a surprised cry to ring from her mouth. He caught her and wrapped her in his embrace, wiping away the tears with his bell-like sleeves. The night was approaching fast and hard, pink dying into purple's awaiting arms. 'We do as we are told and learn late to break off. 'A breathy whisper against her ear, ' You fell without ever knowing that you were falling. Do you want to return to Lindblum? '

 

She looked to the sky, letting the silence fall as she closed her eyes, emotions thrashing about her being. Her whisper was barely audible when she answered.

 

' Never...'

 

And, 'unladylike', she silently cried upon his shoulder as she mentally reviewed all the woman that smiled at her across a dinner table only to find out much later her husband had been in better acquaintance. She heaved shuddery breaths when remembering the years when Cid's attention began to fade and he no longer cared for discreetness. A single, silent sob racked her shoulders at the casual girl in his lap, followed by a shrug and playful grin from the man when the hurt had crossed her face. And the most heart-clawing memory of them all:

 

'A man who loves more than one is admirable, Hilda. '

 

The knowledge that he truly never loved her.

 

After the first affair, he realized her hurt and had apologized tremendously. Yet after time, he came to ignore, shoving the facts into her face, mocking her in front of everyone.

 

And her enemy pitied her…

 

She howled.

 

And she never cried because she was the pretty Lady of Lindblum and that was just unreasonable.

 

'Reason ' had the biggest wings of all...

 

A thread unmercifully pulled at his chest as he watched her cry, making him flinch outwardly. However, she never noticed as her hands clenched his sleeves, giving her firmer purchase, her voice ringing in his ears.