FLCL Fan Fiction / Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ n00b Genesis Evangelion ❯ Part 7 Side Story ( Chapter 9 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Misato studied the file before her. "Name: Nagisa, Kaoru. Nationality: German.
Date of birth: the day the Second Impact occurred. Place of birth: redacted.
Father, mother, legal guardian: redacted. Known relatives: redacted." The
tactician sighed. "She's like Rei; it's as if she didn't exist until the day
she came to NERV Headquarters."

Makoto nodded. "I hacked into Section 2's database, but it's as blank as the
Marduk Institute's," he referred to an agency under NERV, which tested Children
as potential Eva pilots.

"But the risk..." The woman was uncertain how to complete the sentence.

"It was worth taking, if only to know what we didn't know," the man finished.

Another sigh. "Anything else I should know?"

"Yes, but it's a spoiler. Can we...?"

"Go ahead," Misato replied. "It can't be anymore shocking than what the
author's doing."

Makoto shrugged. "Haruhara-san believes Pilot Nagisa is the last Angel. Should
we...?"

"Shinji-kun thought a 10-kiloton yield was 'necessary to kill' the Ninth Angel,"
the woman recalled. "What will he think is necessary to kill this one?"

The man shivered. "Good point."

***

N00B GENESIS EVANGELION, Part 7 Side Story

A 'Neon Genesis Evangelion' story by Sidewinder (aim9snake@hotmail.com), 2010.
Characters created and owned by Gainax. Gunblade based on Nomura Tetsuya's
design for Square Enix. Special thanks to Alain Gravel.

***

"Excuse me, Fräulein Horaki."

The Class President turned to the speaker. "How may I help you, Kaoru-kun?"

"I wish to join the Kendo Club. I apologize for what inconvenience my recent
transfer caused--"

"It's no trouble," Hikari assured. "But the school has no Kendo Club.
Regulations state a club needs at least five members to qualify for school
sponsorship, and faculty approval to reserve the gym for activities; there
wasn't enough interest to start one."

"Pity. What club is Herr Ikari in?" the 5th Child asked.

"He's in-- what did Aida-kun call it-- the Scale Modeling--"

"How can you say the A-91 is worse than useless, when you've yet to handle it?!"
Kensuke drew attention to an issue of Guns & Ammo magazine, with an article on
the A-91 bullpup rifle.

"A right-handed shooter must take his hand off the trigger to manipulate the
safety," Shinji pointed at a lever near the A-91's butt. "If either hand is
injured, I might as well shout, 'Give me a second to arm this ergonomic
nightmare, before you kill me!' The HK416 and HK417 have an ambidextrous safety
above the trigger guard, which both thumbs can manipulate-- a bonus in urban
warfare, where I might switch to shoot from cover."

The 4th Child pointed at a lever on the rifle's foregrip. "It does have a
safety on the left...!"

"For its integral grenade launcher."

"Excuse me, Herr Ikari." Kaoru approached the Stormbringer pilot. "You seem
interested in military history. May I...?" A stranger knocked the 5th Child
off her feet. "Hey!"

"Oomph!" a boy exhaled when Kaoru bumped into him.

"You warmonger-- you monster! How can you discuss murder so casually?!" the
stranger condemned Shinji.

The Stormbringer pilot raised a skeptical brow. "Anne-Marie?"

"My name is Amano Rei, Hero of...!"

"Yaaaa!" Kensuke drew all eyes on his prosthetic leg-- now a flapping, avian
wing that lifted him upside-down, scattering paper like snow in a blizzard--
with one exception.

The 5th Child stared at the leg transformed by her touch. 'I didn't know I
could do that,' Kaoru thought.

"You will kowtow and apologize to me, or I shall avenge my honor!" Amano's
demands were ignored as Shinji, Toji, and Hikari tried to help their friend.
"Then you leave me no choice!" The parody drew a katana-- Japanese long sword,
and... Wham! Kensuke dropped the table he hoped would anchor him, onto Amano's
head. The parody's toupee flew off, exposing surgical scars from a recent
operation-- or lobotomy. Shinji, Toji, and Hikari's attention remained on the
one-winged boy; none noticed the now unconscious Amano, lying on the floor with
footprints covering his back.

"What did I do to deserve this?!" Kensuke cried.

*

Keel frowned at the footage from the classroom surveillance camera. "Herr Rei's
performance was most disappointing."

"I thought the First Children was a girl?" a black monolith-- the form a SEELE
member adopted when using telepathy or astral projection-- asked.

The SEELE leader sighed. "I'm referring to Amano Rei, the-- what did he pilot,
a Gumbo-- we're evaluating as a replacement for the Third Children."

"You mean the Gunboy?" "I thought it was a Gundamn?" "It's the 'Bad Anime'
parody of a Gundamn; the author has a poor opinion of the franchise." "Why was
a parody used instead of the actual article? We can't achieve our goals with
half-baked plans." "Why are we evaluating replacements for the Third Children?
He has exemplary performance against the Angels."

"Because his father is Gendo Ikari, who plans to betray and replace us as God--
the Third Children is his instrument, not ours!" Keel took a deep breath.
"Contact Sotsu, Sunrise, and MBS," the copyright holders. "Evaluate the Gundamn
pilots, and set their-- our best against Ikari's."

***

Pen-Pen toured a commercial district on Planet Mauser. 'Got to love a
government that names planets after gun manufacturers.' The penguin approached
a replicator booth, caught a familiar face, and approached the blue-haired
albino, holding a sign labeled, "AYANAMI REI? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

The girl raised a skeptical brow. "Have we met?"

"I'M PEN-PEN". The penguin saw no change in Rei's expression. "MISATO'S PET--
MASCOT FOR 'NEON GENESIS EVANGELION'", he added.

"Misa-- you mean Major Katsuragi?" The girl shook Pen-Pen's flipper.
"Greetings, Pen-Pen. I'm Lingbo Ling," she caught the penguin's raised eyebrow,
"Rei's sister; it's complicated. What brings you to the Gung-Ho Republic?"

"I'M GETTING A GUN AND A KATANA-- THEN I'LL KICK CMDR IKARI'S ASS UNTIL SHIT
STAINS HIS TEETH", which made Ling laugh.

"How about a gunblade?" With that, the replicator began assembling a knife with
a clip point.

'A Bowie,' Pen-Pen's eyes widened at the 91-centimeter-long blade, 'saber? No,
it's a handgun-saber combo.' The unique sword had a .44 caliber revolver as its
grip, and a cutout in its basket-hilt for the revolving cylinder; the frame was
labeled, "10.9x 33mm R". Like katana, the blade had layers of hard and soft
metal-- folded around a gun barrel, the muzzle visible behind its clip point.

Ling handed the gunblade to the penguin. "Think you can handle it?"

Pen-Pen slashed at his shadow; the momentum near-swept him off his feet, but the
heavy weapon promised serious injury to a target, even one in body armor.
"WHERE CAN I GET AMMO?" the penguin asked.

"It's chambered in .44 Magnum-- .44 AutoMag with moon clips," Ling stated.

"EXCELLENT".

***

End side story.