Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Blood, I've Wept ❯ Hurt Yet Healing ( Chapter 4 )

Disclaimer: I don't own Furuba.

Author's Note: Once again, I would like to thank Ali for helping me write this thing. 50% credit goes to her.

Author's note 2: Not much happens in this chapter…but, it's still important. No skipping, yes? So…yeah, enjoy…

Blood, I've Wept

Chapter 3

Hurt Yet Healing

Meanwhile, back over at Shigure's, Yuki was pondering some rather interesting thoughts. It had occurred to him some few minutes before that he hadn't actually seen himself since he'd been changed. He wondered idly how different he looked---if at all.

Shigure was, maybe, thinking about calling Hatori to ask if Kyou needed anything... But then became conveniently distracted by the little vampire.

"I never did ask Yuki-kun. How did you manage your first day of school as a blood sucker?" he teased gently.

"I...survived." He frowned at the poor phrasing. "In a manner of speaking..."

The dog came to sit near the boy. Unlike Kyou, he was not in the slightest bit bothered by Yuki's new development. He found it quite fascinating actually.

"Good, good. Saki-chan didn't give you any trouble." he gazed up at the ceiling absently. He was quiet for a short amount of time. But this is Shigure: "Kyou-kun didn't ever show up to school?"

Guilt flooded through him, but he didn't mention that he was the reason Kyou had run off to begin with, shaking his head instead and replying with, "No."

Shii chuckled lightly and smiled.

"Such a skittish kitty." he shook his head in amusement "I do hope he doesn't give Haa-san any trouble." His perverted little mind already supply plenty of unlikely troubles Kyou could give Hatori.

Yuki bit his lip lightly, trying to distract himself from the immense guilt by asking,

"Shigure? I was wondering..." He paused, choosing his words carefully. "Do I look any...different?" His eyes sparkled with curiosity as he looked up expectantly at the Dog.

He took his gaze down from the ceiling, and replaced it on the little vampire next to him. That look on his face was cute. Shigure sat up straight and then placed a finger softly on the rat's lips, where he'd been biting.

"A little," he admitted, "Fangs will alter your appearance a bit. You were always pale though, so that's really about it." The dog ruffled his own brown hair quickly with both hands. He couldn't resist the snort that followed."I haven't seen the rest of your body though, so I can't give a full account on your appearance." Yes, Shi-chan cannot resist making such a joke.

And, like Shigure couldn't resist his joke, Yuki couldn't resist what he asked next.

"Do I look...scary?"

The dog blinked at him,

"No?" he asked, sounding amused and confused as he raised an eyebrow. "There has never been anything scary about you Yuki. A pair of fangs is not going to change that." He raised his other eyebrow to meet the other. "Why would you think you look scary?"

He seriously considered actually telling him the truth. That Kyou had called him scary and really hit a nerve, but simply shook his head.

"It's...not important." He assured the other, though his tone rang not quite true.

"Yuki, I always thought your lying skills were better than that." He laughed out without looking down at the rat.

"They usually are." He grumbled in response, furious with himself for his transparent lie.

Shi snorted "Normally, when someone catches you in a lie Yuki. That's a sign to start telling to truth?" It was a harmless enough suggestion.

"Kyou...called me scary earlier." He scowled, glaring at the floor. "And I was just wondering if everyone else thought that too."

"Kyou-kun?" he breathed out, heavy in amused amazement. "Is that why he ran off, Yuki-kun?"

"I guess so..." He didn't mention that he was unintentionally picking up other people's thoughts. Or, maybe it was just Kyou's. That's all he heard so far. That might change Shigure's mind about the Of Course You're Not Scary ideal.

An honest to god comforting smile crossed the dogs face for a moment. "Don't let the silly kitty bother you, Yuki-kun. I think, if he talks to Haa-san, he'll talk some sense into him and Kyou-kun will come back." Maybe, I would rather not have an upset Yuki-kun in my house. "Kyou-kun's being ridiculous about it, and Haa-san's good with things like this."

"I told you before, it's not important." Yuki reminded him, not looking at him for a minute. He still felt guilty and depressed, but tried not to let it show.

"Oh hush, you." Shii snorted looking over at him. "You're doing a horrible job of lying AND masking how you're feeling."

"Gee, thanks." He rolled his eyes, before they finally landed on the Dog, and ceased moving.

He smiled again, titling his head in the process like a dog would.

"It's my duty, as a master of the art, to point it out to you."

Those eyes then slid away from him again, landing on his wrist. The back was paper white, with no traces of blue. He wished that Tohru hadn't interrupted him while he had had it in his grasp. Now, he had a problem, and he didn't know how to fix it.

"I am supposed to take care of you." Shigure interrupted him, sighing as if irritated by the fact. "And you're obviously not fit to lie, so spare me and tell me what the problem is, Yuki-kun."

Yuki held his wrist out to show him, palm up.

"I don't want to hurt anything or anyone." He stated flatly, eyes never leaving the flawless white flesh.

"I don't think it can be avoided, Yuki-kun." He chided a little.

Yuki's eyes snapped up to him, flashing with anger and apprehension.

"I am not going to become a murderer because of this." He nodded down to the exposed wrist, before withdrawing it. He had been raging a mental war over it since the realization that he couldn't change what he was. He had come to the conclusion that he could no more change WHO he was than what.*

"Aaah, so you're just going to die then?" Shigure snorted. It went through his mind that he didn't really believe Yuki would do something so horribly cowardly.

"I'm already dead anyway, aren't I?" He asked, his tone soft and dark. "And... Would you really call this life?"

"Don't be dramatic, Yuki-kun." The dog stated simply. "You would really just die? I had honestly thought both you and Kyou-kun were really beginning to live, now that Tohru-kun is here at least. Was I wrong?" No, Shii-chan can't be wrong.

He would feel bad about just leaving Tohru like that, but he ignored that question in lieu of, "You're one to talk about being dramatic, Shigure."

The signature move: "I don't know what you're talking about."

With a dark snort, he simply went back to, "I'm not going to kill anything."

"When you get hungry enough, I think you'll change your tune." The dog pointed out.

Yuki shook his head stubbornly. He was already hungry, he wouldn't do it. "I am not a canable." He stated frankly.

"Silly, Yuki-kun. Of course you're not a canable" Shigure laughed "Of course not! You're not human anymore. Didn't you notice?"

Yuki stiffened, quite a bit actually, before standing up and moving toward the door. Shigure didn't need to put it so...bluntly. He was very aware of what he was, and didn't need to be reminded.

'Sorry to put it so bluntly...' he thought sadly shaking his head. 'I'm just concerned for you..." But he couldn't exactly up and admit that. It would go against his happy-go-lucky-not-concerned image quite a bit. Instead he settled for watching the rat go sadly without so much as a word.

Yuki froze when he heard that. Damn, so, it wasn't just Kyou, it worked with everyone. At least to some extent, anyway. Slowly, he turned back, shaking slightly.

"Please tell me you just said that out loud?" He requested, his tone bordering on pleading. He didn't like mind reading, it hurt.

Okay, the dog was a little bit shocked by that. He was more than happy to admit it. He blinked at Yuki a couple times; thoughts about how Yuki's shaking worried him flitted in and out of his mind before he could stop them. But then he simply cleared is throat and replied:

"Nope, sorry, Yuki-kun. Didn't say a word."

"Damn." He swore, leaning against the wall and sliding down it. He felt like this was a disease, and was spreading. Fluxuating and overwhelming his mind and body. He couldn't stop it, he knew that. No matter what he tried, it would eventually destroy him. Shii-chan moved over by him quickly, kneeling in front of him.

"What other interesting secrets is it hiding?" he mused to himself aloud with a slight smirk.

His eyes flickered up to land on him, dull and tired.

"Unintended and uncontrolled teleportation," He counted off wearily. "And uncontrolled random bursts of hyper speed."

He ruffled his hair in an uncontrolled bout of affection.

"I'm sorry this is so hard for you Yuki-kun." he started quietly, barely audible. "But I think you'll get used to it eventually. You may never like it... but you'll probably come to accept it."

A moment of silence before,

"It scares me." He had pulled his knee up to his chest, and spoke into it, muffling his voice. He wasn't sure why he was admitting this to Shigure, but he felt like, if he just did, Shigure would make everything better.

"Yuki..." he forgot to add the title as concern over rode his brain. Shii scooted next to him, and not quite embraced, but placed his arms on comfortingly. "It'll be okay, I'll get Haa-san to come back tomorrow, and we'll try again to think of something for you..."

The overwhelming emotions permeating his mind were straining his resolve not to cry, as he slumped against Shigure's chest, letting his face rest against the soft cloth of the other's kimono.

"I..." He half choked on his words, and had to try again. "I don't want to hurt anyone...I don't want anyone to be afraid of me."

That forced the dog to complete his embrace. It really did hurt to see the rat in such a state. "I'm so sorry, Yuki, if I could just fix this for you... I would, in a heartbeat. But I can't... If," he whispered the last part and but he did emphasize IF "It makes you feel better, I'm still not scared of you."

"Thank god." He half hissed, half sobbed, his eyes very bright with tears. He didn't think he would be able to stand it if one more person told him he was scary.

"Now, now." he murmured smiling and then leaning his neck slightly so his lips met the teens cheek for a moment. "There's no need to hiss at me now is there? I'm only trying to help you feel better." His tone had regained that lilting quality.

Yuki looked up at him, revealing those bright, bright eyes. He would have dearly loved to kiss him back, but didn't dare. Instead slowly murmuring,

"Shi...gure...?"

The dog cocked his head to one side slightly perplexed, but also raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, Yuki-kun?" Shi-chan asked smiling away his confusion.

"What...are you doing?" He questioned with an honest to God bewildered expression on. Poor thing may have been intelligent enough, but he was still utterly clueless in some areas.

"Trying my very best to make you feel better?" he offered with a snort of amusement. "Am I not aloud? Would you rather I just leave you in here by yourself?"

"I don't know." He admitted, burying his face helplessly into Shigure's chest.

He really didn't know what he wanted, but this was the man who had--for the most part anyway--rescued him from Akito, maybe he could save him again?

Gure tightened his embrace, only slightly, on the boy, so that his arms fully circled him. He still had to figure out a way to get the stupid little vampire to feed... But for now, Yuki wasn't crying, and that was a good enough start. The dog just held onto him protectively for a while.

"It's...strange...almost." Yuki mused softly, after several moments of almost-comfortable silence. And, really, it was. He had spent his whole life trying to convince himself that, even as a member of the zodiac, he was still a human. Still allowed to feel a human's weaknesses. Tohru had actually had him convinced about that, for a while. But now...now he really wasn't a human. And in an extremely uncomfortable tone, he voiced this to Shigure, trailing off at the end of his small speech to hear the Dog's reaction. Half of him prayed that he would actually take him seriously about it; the other half was somehow hoping that he would just laugh it off, as usual.

He shook his head sighing softly. Shii felt horrible that all this was happening to Yuki, he'd already gone through more than anyone his age should. But he really wasn't sure if he could help the rat this time. But he just smiled down at the teen: "You may not be human anymore, Yuki-kun, but you're still allowed to feel all those things." Shigure assured him, and simply because he can't be serious he chuckled a bit and ruffled the purpely hair with one hand.

He wanted to cry. He honestly wanted to cry. But he couldn't cry, it wasn't an option. Not here, not now, not in front of Shigure. There was more than just pride holding the tears back; there was the fact that he hadn't cried since a week before he left the Main House. Exactly seven days before he'd gotten out...there was no way in hell he was going to start again now.

Shii snorted in amusement again, he's seen enough people to cry to know the signs. The poor little rat's body was tensed up holding it down. "Yuki-kun, it doesn't have to be like that... I'm only here to help you, if you want to let it out you can." In his personal opinion Yuki had every right to cry. "But if not, then cheer up. I promise I'll try to find some way to help you with this."

'I won't get a chance to if he dies from blood loss first though.' he thought sourly

Yuki let out a small grunt of pain, barely noticeable if you weren't listening for it, as the thoughts hit him. Hard. And then? He snapped. And the tears? Those lovely little tears that had been so happy to just stay right where they were attached to his eyeballs a few minutes before? They weren't so content any more, and started fleeing from that place, via a scenic rout down his cheeks, inducing bit back sobs and other less than pleasant side effects that usually accompany crying.

The dog nodded in satisfaction as he finally pulled the rat into a full embrace. See, he still knows how to manipulate people into doing things. "Hmm, it's okay Yuki, I'm here for you..." he murmured soothingly, then dropping to a whisper even though he knew Yuki would still be able to hear him, "as long as I live..." Luckily Kyou was still at Hatori's and Tohru was at work, or else this would be awkward.

If anything, Yuki cried harder at that very last bit. Frustration and self-loathing and fear all soaked into Shigure's kimono. He could actually feel his fingernails through the cloth; he was gripping it so hard.

Shii-chan just let him stay like that for what seemed like hours. But it was probably only a few minutes. Eventually though, he nuzzled his nose against the rats hair, picking him up. Yuki's a fairly small thing, so Shigure had no trouble with it. The dog took Yuki up to his room and set the both of them down on the edge of his futon, still hugging Yuki to him tightly.

It was becoming an increasingly difficult task to keep his affections out of his thoughts... He felt so wrong about Yuki knowing about such a thing.

So, Yuki ended up crying himself to exhaustion and falling asleep, right there in Shigure's lap. One must admit, it was a mighty impressive cry, that one. And even more so, considering it was Yuki who preformed it.

That's what Shigure had expected, and wanted. He tucked the boy into his bed, and then exited to go sulk in his own room. Not that he'd ever admit to sulking, of course.

"I'll call Haa-san later..." he murmured morosely to himself as he shut the door behind him. The dog didn't even get all the way into the room, just sunk down against the back of the door and buried his face in his hands.

~*~

So, speaking of Hatori, he was feeling several different things at the moment. Among which were anger, jealousy, and a feeling of...failure? He was pretending to do work, but in truth, he had finished about five minutes ago, and had proceeded to spend the following time staring blankly at his filled paperwork and occasionally glancing up at Kyou. He felt terrible that he had let it happen to begin with---even though it wasn't exactly his fault---and even worse that he wasn't able to do anything once it was over.

The poor kitty would squirm slightly each time the doctor glanced up at him. He was feeling slightly nauseated right now, his stomach was clenching in a very unpleasant manner. And he was a death, literal drop dead, kind of tired. But there was absolutely NO way he would sleep. He couldn't. So they ended up sitting like that for a while. Kyou just about jumped out of his skin when the phone rang, he paled and stared at it, waiting for Hatori to answer it. But well, it's only Shigure, silly kitty. No need to worry.

"Hello?" Hatori greeted, also feeling tired, but managing to keep it out of his tone, masking it with his usual calm. "Shigure? What is it?"

"Haa-san!" The dog cooed, he was being excessively cheerful. It was the only way to cover up how fucking crappy he felt inside. "I'm calling about a certain kitty who skipped school today. How long do you think he'll be there?"

"I...don't know." He admitted. He couldn't exactly explain about what had happened. He probably wouldn't have, even if Kyou hadn't been in the room but..." He's having some...problems. I'll try to get him there Monday, though." It was only Tuesday, that would give him plenty of time to convince Kyou to go...hopefully.

"All right," he agreed, "Can the two of you come here for a short while tomorrow?" Shii-chan asked hopefully "I need a bit of help with Yuki-kun, and Kyou-kun will need a change of clothes at some point." His tone made it clear, he wasn't going to talk about just what he needed help with.

"I'm...not sure about him, but I'll be there." He agreed with a nod that Shigure couldn't see. "And I can try to get him over there." He wasn't going to force Kyou to go, if he didn't want to, he would just grab some of the Cat's clothes while he was over there, if it came to that.

"All right," Shii murmured in agreement again. "Thank you Haa-san, I'll see you then I suppose." And that was the end of the great phone conversation. Kyou hadn't been listening to a word Hatori had said into the phone, so he just stared blankly at the doctor. Waiting to see if Ha'ri would tell him who had been on the phone.

"Shigure." He offered, noticing the look. Then elaborated with, "He's having a bit of trouble with Yuki, and wanted to see if I could help." He paused before musing, mostly to himself, in fact, completely to himself, "Though, I don't see anything I could do for him that he couldn't."

The cat ran his hands through his flame coloured hair, then rested his forehead on the heels of his hands.

"Okay... they... don't want me back, do they?" He really didn't want to go back. But he wasn't sure whether he'd be happy or sad to hear it IF they did want him to come back. Kyou's eyes drooped wearily as he leaned his head back against the couch waiting for the dragons reply again.

"Quite the contrary." Hatori replied softly, snatching up a near-by pack of cigarettes and a matchbook, holding one of the nicotine sticks between his teeth as he light the match and the filter in turn. "Shigure was very interested in you, he requested that you come with me tomorrow." He let out a long puff of smoke through his nose before adding, "But I'm not going to force you, if you don't want to."

Kyou's body stiffened and he sunk back into the couch, but he didn't have energy for anything beyond that. He opened his mouth a couple times without success before he finally managed: "I... could... but... Yuki...." If he were to go to the house, Yuki would find out about him being raped. The rat would either laugh, or tell everyone who it was who had raped him. Maybe even both. And Yuki had been on that friendship kick... He shook his head very quickly. He was scared to be in any kind of relationship with anyone now, even just friendship. He wasn't sure if he could even stomach being around Tohru right now.

'Stupid vampire, can't just hate me.'

"Isn't going to hurt you." Hatori assured him, misreading the hesitation. It didn't happen often, but Hatori too misread people.

"S'not that. Even though I know he could and I couldn't stop him." the kitty added the last part sourly, but then continued his explanation. "I wouldn't be able..." he paused again, and finished with a sad whisper, "to hide what happened from him."

Hatori didn't say a thing to that, simply watched him. Of course he understood that Kyou wouldn't want Yuki to know but...

"I don't think he'd say anything, if that's what you're worried about."

"N--no! You can't understand... b--because you don't know that it was.... don't know who it was." He honestly was about to tell Hatori who, but changed mid-sentence. The cat's body burned unhappily at the memory of Haru's hands on him. He pulled in on himself, trying to make the feeling go away. "He'd tell someone who it was, because... he'd think he was helping. But I don't want anyone else to know."

"I'd know if you told me." Hatori pointed out, by no means in a tone that demanded a response. He knew how to deal with traumatized children, Yuki had taught him that. Patience was the key to dealing with such things.

"There'd be no point" he responded shortly staring at Hatori over the tops of his pulled up knees and through a curtain of orange hair.

"It might make you feel better if you told someone." He offered with a small shrug. "But, if you don't want me to be that someone, it's perfectly understandable."

"It wouldn't help." Kyou was on the verge of crying again, so he put his shoulders down further, hiding behind his hair and knees rather than looking through them. "If I told you... you would probably confront him... and he'd hurt you..." his voice was muffled "I don't want the bastard to hurt anyone else."

"Kyou," Hatori sighed. "As shocking as you might find this, I'm not stupid." He felt he should point out. "I'm not going to rush off and physically confront someone who was strong enough to overcome you." No, he would find a more...roundabout method of doing it.

"It wouldn't matter... If he found out I'd blabbed to someone he'd get mad. Even if he didn't hurt you he'd come back for me." That was when Kyou realized something. White Haru probably didn't even know what had happened. Kitty definitely couldn't tell anyone now... It would probably end up punishing White for something he didn't do.

"Whatever you think is best." Hatori relented, standing to go prepare some food for them. "Think about going with me tomorrow." he commanded over his shoulder. "I'll get you some clean clothes, while I'm over there, if you decide not to."

Kyou was thankful that that particular conversation was over. Now he really had to think about going to Shigure's. He didn't like being cowardly and avoiding the house. But that damn Yuki. Maybe he could just keep it off his mind while he was there?

"I'll go..." he muttered just loud enough to hear. Maybe if he asked Yuki not to tell anyone he wouldn't... Either way, his pride was speaking now.

The barest traces of a smile flickered momentarily on his face.

"I'm glad to hear it." Hatori announced, before going to get that food.

~*~

And, before either of them had noticed the time had passed, school was out the next day. So, they set out for Shigure's house. (Hatori had wanted to wait for Yuki to actually get home, after all.)

Tohru had scampered off to work, so that left Shigure to answer the door. He beamed happily at his, as usual, sour faced cousins.

"Haa-san, we really must stop this habit... of you showing up with my little housemates in tow." the dog waggled a finger playfully at them, winking. Kyou fidgeted nervously with the string of his jacket from where he was sort of hiding a step behind Hatori.

He was having second thoughts about going into the house.

"You should feel lucky he came at all." Hatori pointed out in a very low tone, before returning it to his normal level and questioning him with, "Now, what seems to be the trouble with Yuki you were talking about?"

"Uhm, eating... like you said was my problem Haa-san." He sweat dropped and scratched his head. "He doesn't want to, and I promised to help think of some other way for him to go about it." Because this is Shigure he laughed "Besides the usual, you know, going into town grabbing someone sucking their blood out and leaving their dead body in an alley way?" Kyou hurried up past them too his room, hopefully no Yuki would appear.

"Is he telling you WHY he doesn't want to eat?" Hatori questioned, leaning against the wall as he listened. "Or is he just...not?"

"He doesn't want to hurt anything." The dog sighed sadly. "And I really don't know how to go about getting blood without hurting SOMETHING."

"What about a blood bank?" Hatori offered with a dry look. "Granted, an injection wouldn't have QUITE the same effect, but frequent exposure should sustain his existence."

"You'll have to help with that then Haa-san." Yeah, Tori is a doctor. "They won't just give me blood after all."

"I know that." Hatori sighed, a sour expression on his face. It shouldn't be too hard to get some blood out of a bank, but it would still be a pain. Hatori went into a bad profession for someone who hated paper work so much.

Shi-chan stuck out his tongue at his best friends face.

"Yuki-kun will appreciate it, and it saves me a lot of trouble." He laughed. "Now... I got out of Yuki-kun why Kyou-kun left, but now I would appreciate you telling me why he's staying for so long Haa-san."

"I told you, he's having some personal problems." Hatori replied vaguely, glancing around for the cat, lest he return to find Hatori and Shigure talking about him. "I'll tell you..." He continued, lowering his tone slightly, despite having assured himself that Kyou was nowhere in hearing range. "But not here."

Shigure raised an eyebrow and snorted at Hatori.

"Haa-san, secrecy much?" he shrugged and the two of them set off for somewhere else to speak.

~*~

Kyou, the pretty kitty, was up in his room searching for baggiest pants he had, and a large unflattering sweater. His thoughts?

'I'm going to hide in the damn things... No ones gonna be able to find me in these fucking clothes.'

He was close to seething as he was forced to remember Haru all over his exposed body.

~*~

Once they were in Shigure's office, and Hatori was firmly in possession of a cigarette, he took a deep breath and mumbled around the burning filter,

"Someone raped him."

"What?" the dog turned around to look at the dragon, chuckling in disbelief. Seeing the serious expression on his childhood friends face Shigure stopped his chuckle. He ran a hand through his hair, going in search of a cigarette of his own. "When'd this happen?"

"My guess is yesterday."

"He didn't tell you? No, I take that back... I guess I'm surprised he told you at all?" Shi-chan mused quietly, then made a triumphant 'aha' as he found his cigarettes.

"He didn't want to." Hatori admitted, letting out his previous drag through a long puff out his nose, relishing the stinging sensation.

"Any idea who?" the shorter asked lighting up and puffing happily on his stick of death. "Or is that what he's keeping to himself?"

"He wouldn't tell me." Hatori shook his head. "But, if he's telling the truth, Yuki should know before too long." He added thoughtfully. "Maybe you can get that little detail out of him."

Shigure laughed, "Yuki-kun might tell me. But, if Kyou-kun asks him not to, he might not."

"Oh?" Hatori chewed idly on the end of his cigarette as he leaned against Shigure's desk. "Shigure? Don't tell Kyou that I mentioned it."

The dog blinked at him, a bit confused, but whatever.

"Okay?" he agreed shrugging, then smiled "You'll take good care of our Kitty for us, Haa-san?" Shi-chan asked in a silly voice.

An actual honest to god smile surfaced to that.

"If I hadn't intended on doing that, he would have been home yesterday."

The smile startled Shigure, but he didn't show it.

"The silly thing needs someone to take care of him." he mused softly to himself. "He deserves someone to protect him, even if it's just for a little while. I'd do it, but for some reason I'm quite sure I'm not the person for the job." he returned his attention to Hatori as he flicked the burnt out cigarette out the window. "Not to dump him on you or anything, Haa-san. But he doesn't have to come back here until he's ready."

"I'm not even going to try to send him back to school until Monday." Hatori informed him, smothering the burning embers of his cigarette between his thumb and index finger, out of habit, before spitting it out the window, after Shigure's.

"I wish we didn't have to send him at all. He probably won't feel very good about being around other people for awhile." Shii conceded, looking out the window at some birds. "I could ask him, but Akito-san would not be very sympathetic to Kyou-kun. Yuki-kun or one of the others, maybe. But definitely not Kyou-kun."

"I think you're overestimating his lenient nature toward Yuki." Hatori mused, grabbing another match and another cigarette, lighting up again.

"Oh, he'd probably let Yuki-kun quit school. But, he'd probably demand that he go back to the main house." he smiled grimly "But that's not really what we were talking about." Shigure was beginning to wonder why he hadn't heard Kyou's thundering footsteps coming back down the stairs yet. This was mostly because, Kyou had packed what he needed, but then huddled in the corner between the futon and window. Unable to make himself move any further.

"So, speaking of Yuki," Hatori changed the subject quickly. "Aside from the not eating thing, how's he adjusting?"

That caused the dog to sigh. "Tohru-kun and I have both assured him we aren't bothered by it. But Kyou-kun's fear really hurt him. A lot. He's scared of all these new powers he suddenly has. Oh, and he doesn't want anyone to be scared of him." He rubbed his eyes "It will take awhile, but I think he'll be able to adjust eventually."

"That reminds me..." He was doing that thing again, where he chewed on the cigarette filter. He knew he shouldn't, but then, he probably shouldn't be smoking to begin with. "What exactly are his powers? The last time I saw him, they hadn't developed enough to tell."

"Mind reading, teleportation, and hyper speed." he quoted the little rat directly. "There might be more, but that's what he told me when we spoke last night."

"Interesting..." Like Shigure, Hatori was approaching the situation with fascination, rather than fear. Seeing the creatures of myth come alive before him was sending him into an almost cruelly excited state. However, he could also see why Yuki might not like it. To go from already having the Zodiac Curse to this must be pretty tough on him...

"Have... you talked to Kyou-kun about why he's so afraid?" Shi-chan asked, "It would help Yuki-kun a lot if we could help Kyou-kun to stop being so frightened." he thought about it a moment longer and sighed. "But after what's happened to him, he may not be willing to interact with someone who can over power him like Yuki-kun can now." What a wretchedly frustrating situation!

"Yuki could easily overpower Kyou before, I don't think that's the issue." He shook his head. "Unfortunately, I'm not sure if even Kyou knows why he's so scared."

"Not everyone finds vampires interesting like us, Haa-san." the dog stuck out his tongue again. "Most people are frightened of vampires, and I really don't BLAME Kyou-kun for being one of those people. But it is hurting Yuki-kun, and in general I think things would be easier if they just kissed and made up."

"No you don't." Hatori pointed out, trying to keep the amusement and teasing out of his tone. "You don't want anyone to kiss Yuki."

Yes, Hatori knew. And had for quite some time. He'd even confronted Shigure over it at some point, but that had been the end of the conflict on the subject. And, really, it had been more of a demand for an explanation than an actual conflict to begin with. Shigure sighed in exasperation.

"Haa-san, please. That boy is around here somewhere, and I'd rather him NOT hear that." he smiled over at his friend. "It was only a figure of speech, and of course I want SOMEONE to kiss Yuki-kun. Namely me." Which he had done, last night.

"You do realize you won't achieve anything with him, unless you tell him, right?"

"I don't want to achieve anything, Haa-san!" the poor dog whined, "How many times have I told you this? Please count with me, one... two.... three..." he paused thinking of each time. "At least four times."

So said the man who had prompted Hatori into kissing Kana that first time. The remembrance of such an event birthed a small frown, but for both of their sakes, he didn't mention it.

Shigure snorted in triumph, but didn't miss the rebirth of that frown.

"Shall we go find your kitty then, Haa-san?" he offered, even though he wasn't really offering, he was exiting the study to go look for him as well as figure out where Yuki was. There hadn't been any fighting yet, so the two teens must not have met up yet?

There was a very good reason for this, as Shigure would soon find out. The little vampire-rat was in the exact same position he'd been in since he got home, sitting on his bed--still in his uniform, he'd yet to bother to change--staring rather blankly at the wall, in an almost catatonic state, determinedly ignoring the goings-on of the world around him.

The dog poked his head in the door,

"Yuki-kun?" he cooed in a silly voice, but not waiting for a reply. "Yuki-kun, if you wanted to try and speak with Kyou-kun again nooows your chance. He's in his room."

Without a word, Yuki shook his head, eyes never moving from that point on the wall. He had come to the conclusion that if Kyou was going to be afraid of him anyway, what was the point in merely provoking him?

The older came a little ways into the room,

"All right, hmmm what else." he paused there had been something else he wanted to tell the vampire. But the boy had this irritating habit of making him forget his train of thought. "Oh yes, I spoke with Haa-san for you. He'll fill out some paperwork and we should be able to get you food from a blood bank." Shi-chan's tone changed to kind of hopeful.

"Is that all right Yuki-kun?"

Finally, Yuki blinked, looking over at him at last, and replying with a small nod.

Shigure sighed, wishing Yuki wouldn't do that. But left the room to find Kyou. He did, and finally rousted the cat from where he'd been sulking in a corner. The thing looked kind of silly in the large sweater he'd donned but mentioned nothing. Just herded Kyou down the stairs.

"Haa-san, your lovely kitten has been found." he announced, half expecting Kyou to beat him. But the teen just waited anxiously in the living room, he hadn't even heard what Shigure had said.

"He's not mine." Hatori felt inclined to point out, whapping the dog gently on the back on the head as he went to go retrieve Kyou from the living room.

"Oww Haa-san!" he whined, even though the hit hadn't hurt. "But you're the one taking care of him right now. He is yours!" Kyou heard that one.

"I'm not fucking anyone's, Shigure you bastard!" He didn't want to be anyone's, because techniqually his body was already claimed by Haru. Again those god-awful memories surged up in him. Kyou drew in on himself looking down at the floor in pain.

Steering him toward the door, neither of them noticed a certain little vampire peeking down at Kyou and cringing visibly from the top of the stairs, as Hatori spoke to Shigure.

"I'll be back as soon as I can get that blood for Yuki." He promised the Dog with a small nod.

Meanwhile, Yuki's eyes widened as the word 'Haru' entered his mind. Oooooh shit.

The kitty-cat didn't cringe away from the doctor, and allowed himself to be moved towards the door. It was starting to hurt to be moving around, and he just wanted to go cry on Hatori's couch. But knew he couldn't do that, so he settled on just wanting to go back to Hatori's.

"All right Haa-san!" Shigure smiled, and waved to Kyou, but was ignored. "Take good care of the silly thing," he reminded.

Yuki watched with a horrified expression as Hatori steered Kyou out of the house. Haru had raped him? Haru didn't do that. He just...didn't. Of course, the fact that the little mental rendezvous had left him with a pounding headache didn't really help any.

If it hurt Yuki's head, imagine Kyou's head as he remembered what he'd experienced first hand. He was becoming increasingly agitated with each replay of it too. It continued until he was pretty much throwing himself into the car and staring with pleading eyes at Hatori to please, for the love of god, just take him back to his house.

"Did you have a pleasant visit?" Hatori questioned him, in that usual calm tone, climbing into the driver's seat and starting the ignition.

~*~

Yuki meanwhile, had sunk down to the floor at the top of the stairs, clinging to the banister as he tried not to keel over and roll down the stairs. Somehow, he had a feeling that doing so would not help his headache any.

~*~

"I didn't see the rat. So it was fine..." the kitty replied, leaning fully back into the seat and swimming in the ridiculous sweater he'd gotten from his closet. He had the bag of clothes situated on his thighs.

~*~

Shigure turned around from where he'd been waving off his cousins. As he turned, he spotted his other relative.

"Yuki-kun?" he asked, raising an eyebrow and heading up the stairs

The rat looked like crap.

"Oh...god..." He stammered, eyes still wide, He was getting physically ill from the images he had just unwillingly witnessed. Haru--HIS Haru--...ravaging Kyou. The same Haru that had just clung to his sleeve as usual that morning, and every time he'd seen him before since the Ox was five years old...

The rest of the stairs were climbed quickly and the dog was kneeling down by him. Supporting him softly, but firmly with his arms.

"Yuki-kun? What's wrong?" Shigure couldn't or wouldn't hide his concern.

Yuki literally clung to him when Shigure reached him, breathing heavily as he leaned into him for support.

"I really, REALLY hate this mind reading thing." He mumbled, as much to himself as to Shigure.

"You saw who raped Kyou-kun?" the dog asked, hoisting him up, not waiting for an answer and taking the nezumi back to his own room.

"Mmhmm." He nodded, still shaking and with no intention of letting go of Shigure anytime soon.

Well okay then, if the rat wasn't going to let go.... Shigure set them both onto the bed and leaned back against the wall.

"Want to tell me?" he asked raising an eyebrow, but still petting the purpely hair comfortingly.

"He'd hate me even more if I did." Yuki pointed out, though the desire to confess the images and words was almost overwhelming.

Shii nodded "Probably." The dog snorted "But I think Haa-san really wants to know." The doctor could deny it all he wanted, but Hatori did not smile. He did not smile when he thought about Kana; he did not smile when he thought about Tohru. He did not smile. But he had smiled, and he had been thinking about Kyou.

"Besides, it's obviously really bothering you." he added in a soothing tone.

It took him several times to finally get it out, and when he did it was barely a squeak.

"Haru."

"Oh." was the only intelligent thing Shigure could think to say. It had been surprising enough to hear Kyou had been raped. But, by the Ox? Who always got his ass kicked by Kyou? How had he managed it?

"Did... You get everything that happened from Kyou-kun's mind?" he inquired really, honestly curious as to how the younger teen had over powered their ferocious kitten.

Slowly, still trembling, Yuki nodded, tightening his grip on Shigure's kimono. He REALLY hated reading people's minds...

"Aww, Yuki-kun." Shigure chuckled. "I'm sorry, I know those aren't things a child should see." The fucking bastard could not resist his joke.

"I...can't believe he would do that." He rambled, shaking his head the slightest bit. "I mean...it's Haru! HARU!" He was still having trouble grasping it.

"White, no," he admitted "Black, I'm not surprised." There wasn't any nicer way to put it. Sighing, he couldn't help but rest his cheek on the top of Yuki's head. The dog was slightly angry at Haa-san for bringing up his feelings. He hated talking about feelings, especially ones he had no intentions of acting on.

'I had better not tell Haa-san... He'll be even more furious.' he noted mentally.

Yuki's trembling slowed slightly as he looked up at him with a confused look on his face.

"Why are you angry at Hatori?" he questioned curiously.

"Hmmm?" the dog immediately pushed his thoughts away. "Not so much angry. Just some mutual teasing about certain delicate areas between the two of us." he explained vaguely.

"Do you ever not tease him?"

The older really had to think about that.

"When the occasion demands." he smiled "But those occasions do not arise very often."

He supposed that was good. Because, whenever Shigure couldn't make light of a situation, it must mean the end of the world. And he said as much.

Poor Gure snorted helplessly.

"Are you sure? You were quite angry when I was making light of your situation just the other day." he pointed out, still smiling.

"I still am." Yuki assured him, his tone taking on a slightly cooler edge.

The dog raised an eyebrow at him, and then kissed his cheek, quickly like he had the night before.

"Aww don't be mad, Yuki-kun. I'm sorry." he grinned, his voice not serious in the least. Shigure vaguely remembered the conversation he'd had with Haa-san about 'Kissing and Making Up'.

That odd little desire to kiss him rushed back, and for a moment, Yuki was relieved and thrilled that he couldn't blush. He had similar feelings that Shigure couldn't read HIS mind.

He nuzzled playfully against Yuki's cheek.

"Am I forgiven Yuki-kun?" he asked in the same lilting tone that had immerged before.

"No." He sniffed huffily. Shigure should care that he'd died, damnit!

"Aww," came the cooed response "What do I have to do to make it up to you, Yuki-kun?" Maybe this wasn't a good game to be playing. But Shigure couldn't find it in himself to stop.

Yuki pondered that almost limitless offer, but then came to what he really wanted at that moment.

"Wilfully tell me what you're thinking right now." He ordered, sitting up straighter in Shigure's lap.

"Hmmm?" It would be a direct lie to himself if he tried to say he wasn't surprised by the request. He went over what he was thinking, and decided it wouldn't hurt him too badly to tell the rat. He could always fall back on his usual laughing it off.

"I was thinking, how I wish Haa-san wouldn't tease me about much I care for you. And how I wish he'd stop trying to get me to confess it." He laughed and shook his head. "The mans a horrible hypocrite if you ask me."

"Or you are." Yuki offered with a small shrug. To tell the truth, the main reason he had asked was because he hadn't been able to hear it on his own. And had been honestly curious, besides, this was a much less painful method, as far as Shigure was concerned.

"Ow! Touché." the dog nuzzled the younger's cheek again lightly with his nose, smiling. "But, in case you didn't notice now I have indeed confessed. He can shut up about it. And I did as you requested." He sounded quite smug about it too. "You must now forgive me."

"Forgiven." He agreed, his head still pounding, though he did try very hard not to show it, and he snuggled down against Shigure's chest, taking in the warmth. He wasn't going to kill him, he didn't want to hurt him, but that didn't mean he wouldn't cuddle, by god!

"Yay!" Shigure chirped, his emotions somewhere in-between mock and real honest to god glee. Either way, he planted a soft kiss onto the pretty purple hair. It was probably the latter, seeing as Yuki wasn't crying like he had been the previous night. That made things worlds better. That and Yuki was cuddling him out of his own free will. Not just clinging because he was vulnerable and upset.

~*~

Anyways, Kyou about fell asleep in the car on the way back. He hadn't slept the previous night. He'd only managed to stay awake thus far because of a lot of coffee, and even now the effects were waning. As he and the doctor entered the house, he murmured in a horrified voice: "Gods, I have to sleep..."

"Do you want a couch, chair, or a bed?" Hatori questioned him courteously. No way in hell was he going to make Kyou take whatever was left over.

The cat blushed furiously. Where wasn't the problem?

"I---I---" he didn't know how to tell Hatori what he needed. "W-where ever." was what he ended up murmuring. It really didn't look like him. Kyou didn't feel like himself. But then again, he had a right to be a little changed after being savagely raped by a cousin who, until yesterday, he thought he could trust.

"Anything else you need?" Hatori questioned him, flipping on the light. "Tea? Coffee?"

"N-no." Kyou replied, trying his very hardest to get his voice under control. He ended up curling up in the corner of the couch again. It was slowly becoming his customary spot. "Thank you..."

"Kyou..." He sighed, feeling incredibly awkward by this point. "If there's something you want to talk about...I'll listen, if you want me to." Hatori had no idea that Kyou himself had uttered almost those exact words to Tohru in the past.

The creature on the couch swallowed nervously. After his afternoon at Shigure's he wanted nothing more than to tell the doctor who had raped him. He was certain that Yuki had found out, he was pretty sure it was Yuki he'd glimpsed just briefly up the stairs, anyways. But he wasn't sure if he could trust the doctor with that much, just yet.

"Thanks, Hatori," was what the dragon got. "But I'm okay."

"That's fine." He nodded, walking toward his room. "You'll either need to go back to school by Monday, or go warn Kazuma that they'll be calling him." He added as an after thought. "But, as a warning to you, he'll probably want to know why."

Kyou stiffened on the couch as he watched Hatori. The older Sohma was almost all the way in his room when the cat shot up, going about half way between across the room to him. Mewling in complete and abject terror: "Hatori!" But then he stopped, realizing what he'd just done. His crimson eyes got wide, and they got watery.

He turned back to face him, eyebrows high in a mildly curious expression.

"Yes?"

That was a bit too much for him; a couple of tears worked their way out of the neko's eyes. "P-please don't leave me out here." He stuttered. It was hidden in the ridiculously large sweater, but he was shaking. He didn't know how else to ask, but he hadn't been able to sleep the previous night. He'd been too busy watching the room, horrified that Yuki, or Haru would show up if he went to sleep.

"I offered you my bed before, and the offer still stands, if you wish to accept it." He pointed out, feeling unusually patient with the poor ostracized boy. "I assure you, I have no arguments about sleeping on the couch."

He had gotten more than used to it during the earlier stages of his relationship with Kana. It was what had kept his sign a secret as long as it had been. He felt a little awkward doing it, but took a step back towards Kyou, and gently wiped the tears away with his index finger.

Kyou's face turned red, and he wiped the rest of the tears away furiously with the sleeves of his humongous sweater. He looked fucking adorable as he did it.

"No... You don't understand... it doesn't matter where!" he cursed, giving up on trying to make the tears stop. He took one half step closer, he sobbed into his hands, which were covered by the long sleeves. But he was leaned against Hatori's chest. "I just can't be alone again damnit!"

Grasping his shoulders, Hatori steered him into his room, shutting the door behind him. Hatori's bedroom wasn't exactly equipped for two people. A single person futon in the corner of the room, a closet on the opposite side, a small nightstand with some basic things on it, and not much else. So, he turned the light on, and did what he had done with Kana, he pulled out the big blankets.

Gods was Kyou ever embarrassed, he'd just asked someone to sleep with him, and he couldn't believe he'd done it. (Not that kind of sleep with) But he simply collapsed where the dragon motioned for him to go. The cat honestly couldn't do much once he'd fallen down. Simply curled up, that sweater very convenient for doing just that. Then he was out. His pretty, but tear streaked face finally relaxing a little.

With a nod of satisfaction, Hatori put his blankets down next to his futon and--not even undressing--laying down onto the plush material, after watching for a few minutes, to make sure that Kyou was okay for the time being, he too drifted off to sleep.

Of course that couldn't last. It wouldn't be fun if the obligatory nightmare didn't occur. To summarize: Kyou was vividly remembering being raped. To the point where he was protesting the touches just like he had the first time.

"Haru! Don't." and then whimpering, "S-s-stop..." He'd been held when he was raped, so he didn't thrash now. But he did break into a cool sweat and his face was twisted in pain.

Hatori had been awake for about three minutes, listening to him verbally struggle when he heard that. Frowning deeply, he actually grabbed Kyou's shoulder. Haru couldn't have done it. It was...well, Haru!

The cat gasped and opened his eyes when he felt someone touching him. Recognizing it as his big strong dragon, Kyou scrambled up wrapping his arms frantically around the older neck. He closed his eyes as he shook and buried his face in the crook of Hatori's neck. He wasn't aware of speaking aloud as he'd experienced his dream rape. Now he was a bit busy wondering why he'd thought of Hatori as his.

"Why didn't you tell me it was Hatsuharu?" Hatori questioned him, apparently calm, but Kyou couldn't see the cold glare in his eyes as he awkwardly pat the boy's back, trying to calm him.

"How---" Kyou started, he was unwilling to relinquish his hold on the other or open his eyes, so he wouldn't see that look. But then he tried to answer Hatori's question: "Because." Was all the doctor was offered at first.

"It's not nice to withhold information from people who are trying to help you."

"I didn't tell you because, even once I told you, what were you going to do?" the boy demanded angrily, even though his never slackening hold spoke differently about how he was feeling.

"There's...not much I can do." He murmured softly, admitting it to himself as much as to Kyou. He was no match to Haru, White or Black, so confrontation was out of the question. He wouldn't have been able to squeeze any favours on the matter out of Akito, and even if he had been able to, he knew what the family head did to people he didn't like. He'd never wish that fate on anyone, no matter what their crime.

"EXACTLY!" the cat began crying again. It was so goddamn humiliating! Hatsuharu, his younger cousin, the one he took to the bathroom when he was little, the one he always beat without any trouble. Hatsu-fucking-haru was the one who had gotten the best of him, then fucking raped him. He voiced most of that in a hissing tone that sometimes hitched from crying. "I hate him... White probably doesn't even know about it too..."

"This is probably a bad time to remind you but...you need to make a decision on whether you'd rather go back to school, or go speak about this with Kazuma." Hatori reminded him, the awkward pats slowly developing into a full-blown comforting embrace.

"Be humiliated, by having to tell my Master and father figure I was raped. Or suffer through school." he mused; absolutely loving being held by someone who he was positive wouldn't rape him. But Kyou managed to sniffle out sarcastically, "You've put me with such and easy choice Hatori..."

"It's not my fault, those are you're only options." Hatori pointed out, his tone clipped, though his eyes were gentle, and his just-reached embrace told other wise of his mood. "And, if you don't go to school, they'll call him to see where you are anyway. So, if you're going with that option, it's just sooner or later that you'll have to explain things to him."

He didn't want to see Tohru. He didn't want to see Yuki. He didn't want to see the Yankee or the psychic. He didn't want to see Momiji. He. Didn't. Want. To. See. Haru.

"That's fine... he'd have found out eventually anyways." the cat decided quickly. "I can't face all those people at school right now." He murmured. It hurt his pride a lot but he really couldn't deal with anyone other than Hatori.

"That's fine, I'll take you to find him tomorrow." He nodded calmly. "Oh, and, Kyou? Yuki...knows what you're going through. To be hurt and scared of someone. If I know him at all, he won't tell Honda-kun anything he might know, if you're worried about that."

"Even if he didn't understand... he wouldn't tell her. It would upset her even more. Neither of us ever want to upset her." the cat stated, the sobs finally stopping so his tears flowed silently. Kyou squirmed closer to the dragon and relaxed slightly. Enough about Yuki! Thank god for Hatori!

~*~

The next day, Kazuma Sohma was just finishing up a lesson when Hatori all-but shoved a very tired looking Kyou up to the front of his dojo. He greeted them with a friendly smile and the standard 'what a surprise' reaction, before looking expectantly between them for some sort of reason for Hatori to be escorting Kyou to a place he knew perfectly well where was.

Kyou was once again, completely embarrassed. Damnit, why couldn't Hatori do it! And if the stupid doctor wasn't going to, why couldn't he leave and let him talk to master? He shook his head, holding tightly to edge of yet another stupidly large sweater.

"Uhm, Master, I kind of need to talk to you..." the pretty kitty murmured glancing at the dragon out of the corner of his eye.

"I'll leave you two to that then, shall I?" Hatori offered, bowing politely, just the slightest inclination of the waist, to Kazuma, before turning to leave. The teacher waved him off, then turned back curiously to his young charge.

"Yes? What is it?" He had always been patient with Kyou, and this was no exception as he waited for Kyou to answer.

"Hatori, wanted me to," he started, fidgeting slightly. "He wanted me to warn you that the school might call you... To ask where I am." He knew well enough that Kazuma would not be happy with just that. But, he can always hope, can't he?

Indeed, that did birth a small frown on his face. "Why were you with Hatori? And you weren't in school because...?" He let that question hang in the air, to allow Kyou to finish it with a statement.

"Uhm, Hatori's been taking care of me." the cat licked his dry lips and swallowed anxiously. "And I... couldn't go to school, I'd... I'd see him there." This was a lot harder than he'd anticipated, and his face was slowly beginning to turn red with embarrassment. It was a lucky thing that Kazuma is patient, or else Kyou would have really been pushing it.

So, yes, Kazuma was getting that distinct feeling that he should be sitting down for this.

"You aren't in school because you'd see who?" He prompted, resting his chin on his pulled up knee.

"Hatsuharu." he answered shortly, closing his eyes and pulling the sweater down around him.

That one threw him for a loop.

"Since when are you so reluctant to see him?"

"Since... since...." Kyou's eyes snapped back open, they were sad and hurt things. Begging Kazuma to be able to read his mind like Yuki and spare him the trouble of saying it. "Since he raped me in the dojo showers two days ago." he blurted out quickly, tensing and waiting for the teacher's reaction.

Now, most people would have reacted negatively to hearing that. But Kazuma simply stared at him, his expression utterly blank for a good long moment before asking,

"We are thinking about the same Hatsuharu, correct?"

The kitty rubbed his upper arm nervously through the cloth and looked away, more than ashamed.

"Yes..." he really wanted Hatori to come back now. But he finished with a murmur: "He was Black though..."

That still didn't answer his question of why, but he didn't ask. Instead he questioned Kyou with,

"Why aren't you at Shigure's?" Where he had left him, asking him to stay a very long time ago.

"Yuki..." God, such a coward. Now he definitely couldn't look Master in the eyes.

"Kyou," he sighed deeply. "I'm aware you're not fond of him, but didn't we decide that living there was GOOD for you?"

"I'm sorry Master! It wasn't that! Since Tohru came, we were getting along fine... He even said he wanted to be my friend, but now he's a VAMPIRE!" Kyou shivered "You can ask Hatori if you don't believe me... But--but I was scared of him, I didn't know where you were so I went to Hatori. Then the next morning I came here and Haru... and I can't go back and worry Tohru now."

"A...vampire." He repeated, looking thoroughly confused and reluctant to accept it. "As in a European mythological blood-sucking fiend?" Yeah, because that REALLY sounded like Yuki.

Kyou grimaced, running his fingers through his flame coloured hair tiredly. "I know it sounds like a load of crap. But it's true."