Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Custody ❯ Everything begins to make sense ( Chapter 30 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Momo didn't know how long she sat there in silence. It took her a while to come to terms with the fact that she was not alone after all: she had an older brother. Better yet, she had an older brother who she had chosen with all her heart long before she learned the truth.

She had a million questions, of course, but she knew that she would always love her brother, regardless of the answers to them.

-“Onii-chan?” She looked around the dining room for Momiji, but he wasn't there. Before she came up with the idea of looking for him, she broke down in tears and giggles. Just saying the word produced an overwhelming feeling inside her. Her life-long dream had come true.

`I have a big brother.'

Her hand went to her eyes to wipe away the tears, laughing all the while out of real happiness for the first time in what felt like forever to her. When she opened her eyes again, she noticed Momiji's plate still on the table, in front of his empty seat. A horrible thought crossed her mind, and she got scared. She then remembered him telling her that he was sorry, and her reply that he had nothing to feel sorry about… or did she just think of saying the words?

`He said he wouldn't leave without telling me.'

She heard the front door open and close.

`That must be Grandma.'

Momo walked to the living room to meet the old lady, but when she got there she found it empty. The smile disappeared from her face as she ran to Momiji's bedroom, calling his name. He wasn't there.

His things were gone too, as she discovered when she opened the closet to find it empty. There was no trace of him.

`He's gone. He left without telling me.'

Her first impulse was to run after him, but on second thought, she decided to let him go. There was no point in following someone who wanted to leave. Besides, maybe it was for the best now. She needed to think.

`What can I say to him? What if I say something that I come to regret later? What if I hurt him with my words, with my questions?'

She knew that she was happy to have a brother, but she couldn't sort out her feelings about the whole situation: `Why didn't anyone tell me before? Why did we have to grow up separated? Why didn't our parents ever talk about him? How could they forget..?'

She sat on the neatly made bed …his bed. She faintly recalled that Momiji's room back in Japan looked somewhat like this one. `…must be the furniture.'

Now that she knew about her brother, some other things finally started to make sense. She found that she understood her father a little better now: The longing in his eyes, the sadness all about him, the wistfulness in his voice, and lately, the idea of going back to Japan by himself `to visit'.

`He wanted to see his son. He probably wanted to go to his graduation too, but the recital was on the same day.'

Her mother, however, was a puzzle to her, and she couldn't figure out what the missing piece was and where it fit.

`He is her first born, her child. How could she leave and move away from him? How could she bear to be separated from her son? Mama never looked sad, whereas Papa sometimes gave me this look… He missed Momiji, and I guess he saw a little of him in me.'

-“Momiji nii-san.” She didn't get a chance to call him brother after he told her what she wanted, no, demanded to know. Her hand went to her neck instinctively and gripped her rabbit charm to get some comfort from it. The glint of the bracelet in the dim light of the lamp next to her caught her attention and she admired once more the beautiful gift from her brother. The charm in her hand grew warm while she held it. Momo realized that it was the first time she touched it like that since the day Momiji arrived. She smiled.

-“Why would I need to hold you, when I had my big bunny brother to hold instead…” she trailed off. The smile disappeared from her face as she said the words. She got the feeling of falling suddenly into a pool of ice cold water. Momo looked at the moon and the rabbit hanging from the bracelet. Her eyes filled with tears as realization struck her. Once again, the answers to her questions had been given to her long ago in riddles. His words came back to her.

`Momiji is the rabbit.'

Everything made sense to her at last: His rabbit-like nature, his kindness, the longing in his eyes, his eternal sadness… She knew that deep down, her brother was always sad, and that he wanted to make people believe that he was happy so that nobody would worry about him. He had done it to protect her.

`He said that the rabbit is always sad because he can never go back to his family… Who made you believe that?' Her eyes filled with tears once again.

`Do you really believe that you don't have a family anymore? What about me? Don't you know that I need you? …that I need my brother?'