Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Drunken Melodies ❯ JFLS ( Chapter 1 )

Drunken Melodies

A Rather Perverted One-Shot

 

THE ONLY PERSON WHO'S IN CHARACTER IS KYOU.

The other two are drunk, so it's okay that they're little crazies

 

Warnings: Sexual references, lots of 'em, and I guess it's pretty damn close to pornographic. It's dirrrty. The most dirty thing I've ever written.

Yuki tries to get in Kyou's pants. And so does Tohru.

 

 

 

 

 

"Tell meh how I'm 'uppoed to breath wit no air." Tohru sang, in her pretty high voice that made her slurred melody sound actually kind of nice. Sure, American Idol would have booted her butt off the stage - mainly that counter by the backdoor in the kitchen - but they weren't in America, were they? Naw, they were in Japan, where almost everything goes.

 

Especially violet-hued haired boy's shirts.

 

"Can't leeve, can't breath wit no air," Yuki sang back, throwing his bare arms above his head, empty bottle of sake glinting in the overhead light as he crossed his arms at his wrist and clumsily swayed his hips back and fourth before rolling them to the left, muscles in his abdomen flexing quite beautifully.

 

Tohru groaned, hugging the cabinet, dressed only in her yellow-paid pajama pants and a tank top as she shifted her weight on the countertop, heels precariously off the edge as she rolled her shoulders back, one at a time, twisting a bit at the waist.

 

"That'z how eye feel wen eva yer not there," the girl continued, more enthusiastic with her vocals this time, really belting it out into the cabinet as she swung a door outward, towards her chest, nearly knocking her off balance and a good three feet off the counter and onto the unforgiving floor and/or sexy-dancing Yuki.

 

"There'z no air, NO AIR!" Yuki continued, not noticing, as he dropped his arms and rocked his hips forward and back slightly for a lingering second, before prancing around the room barefoot, pulling stunning little moves and ranking his hands down his chest in a very seductive manner whenever he stopped his gallivanting to do very naughty things with the air.

 

If any of the fan girls had been watching, they would have already had about three orgasms just thinking about that lithe body doing those moves against them.

 

"Ya got mee out hurr in the wadda so deeepppp," Tohru sang, her voice deepening as she sang the male part, her version of deep coming out like Depp. Exhaling sharply as Yuki yelled the next part, Tohru mumbled with a red-hot blush, "Oh, I love me some Johnny Depp."

 

The brunette licked her lips and hugged the cabinet again.

 

"Tell meh 'ow ya goin' bee witout meh," Yuki yelled as Tohru did the preceding, swaying his hips for the trillionth time, except this time a little more like a salsa dancer, knees bending as he rolled his hips downward, the waistband of his dark slacks- which were for, whatever random reason, unbuttoned - falling even farther down his hips.

 

Orgasm number eleven had the fan girls been around.

 

 

"Take it off, b-by!' Tohru screeched, leaning forward and pressing her breasts against the cabinet, jutting out her butt and swaying her hips too, nearly loosing her balance on the counter again. Before turning forward quickly and squatting, she somehow managed to not fall and simply just landed hard on the countertop, her butt underneath her.

 

"As you wish," Yuki smirked clumsily, the usual cool movement of lips twitching into a smile, a frown, and even a little 'o' that made his pretty face just look plain stupid. Yuki padded/skipped and took a place in front of the girl, dropping the sake bottle to the floor. Rather boyishly, he simply pushed at the cloth that sat just below his butt and it came to a rumpled mess at his feet on the floor. He didn't even bother to step out of the cloth before he inserted a thumb into either side of his blue briefs on his hips, just next to the pretty little curve of bone that jutted slightly at the V of his pelvis.

 

Tohru clapped, tried to whistle - but it sounded more like a raspberry than a cat-call - and winked, trying to play the part of a paying mistress but looked more like a one-eyed monster, with her scrunched nose, Sid Vicious lip and barred teeth.

 

"Give it to me, b-by," Tohru purred, smirking, fixing her face, clearly out of her mind. Dirty talk without the sex in Tohru's voice was like dirty talk with the sex in Shigure's voice. It didn't sound nice, nor did it sound right. Because, psh, everyone knew Shigure didn't get laid.

 

"Oh, ya kno I can't bree-thee witout ya," Yuki grinned stupidly, hair all mussed up and sticking to his cheeks and his left eyelash. He started to pull down…

 

Orgasm number twenty-two, had the fan girls been around.

 

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!?" a loud voice attached to a very angry orange haired teen yelled just as Yuki started to show some pubes. The sliver-haired boy stopped his actions but didn't remove his hands, glancing over his shoulder and to the entry-way to the kitchen, replying with a small smile, "Showin' thee goods, silly kitty."

 

"TO WHO?" Kyou demanded, glaring intently at his flushed cousin. His eyes darkened when Yuki tried to smirk again and nodded over his shoulder. The orange haired teen moved his gaze and fixed it onto the brunette still sitting on the kitchen counter, who was eyeing the area between Yuki's legs very carefully, a little pout on her swollen lips.

 

"He waz strippin' for mee, Kyou," Tohru mumbled, the right strap of her tank top falling down her shoulder. "Why'd ya make him sh-top?" She glanced up and met his gaze, crimson eyes widening to near damn saucers.

 

The boy stomped over to the brunette, dropping the bag that had been slung over his shoulder on the kitchen floor, contents - books, notebooks, a condom? [1] - messily falling out for drunken eyes to see.

 

Placing a hand on Tohru's forehead, Kyou bent slightly at his waist to meet the girl at the level of her eyes. He smelled the liquor, not exactly the sake but something fruity with a tang of alcohol.

 

"Shigure's damn wine coolers," Kyou growled, in his throat, Adam's apple dropping. Tohru's eyes fell along with it, seemingly glaring at his chest through the dark-shirt he wore. She licked her lips again, Kyou standing up straight and freezing when he saw the action, dropping his hand from her feverously warm forehead.

 

Spreading her knees, Tohru scooted her butt forward, so she was practically sitting on the edge. In one swift movement that seemed too quick for a drunk, the "adventurous" brunette caught a finger in a belt loop of Kyou's cargos and jerked his hips towards her, catching his frame between her knees as she leaned up slightly and captured his lips with her own.

 

She was messy, first pressing a kiss to the side of his mouth before pressing her lips directly against his. She flicked her tongue out almost immediately, quickly tracing his lower lip with her salvia before biting down on it, causing the stunned teenager to gasp and press his lips back when her teeth fell away. Kyou squeezed his eyes shut, feeling her hands fall away from his pants and caress the back of his head, fingers tangling themselves in his hair.

 

A second later and Tohru was in his mouth, pressing the tip of her tongue to the roof and drawing it quickly forward, causing Kyou to shudder and accidentally bite down on the brunette's appendage. The girl groaned against his mouth and responded by tugging hard on Kyou's hair, the vibration from her moan and the electricity ignited by that pull of his locks sending shockwaves down his spine and into his pelvis.

 

Only when he felt the slight filling of his pants and heard Yuki whisper something to their left did Kyou regain enough response-power to pull away and stare stunned at not only Tohru, but his cousin as well.

 

"Let'me git in on tat action," Yuki repeated, a bit more impatient this time, as he grabbed fist full's of Kyou's shirt and spun him around to face the him. Haughtily pressing his chest against Kyou's after dropping his hands, Yuki pressed a full kiss against his cousin's lips, reaching around and grabbing the orange-haired teen's ass with both of his hands

 

It didn't take Kyou even a half a second to respond to Yuki, and he wasn't gentle as he pulled back and smacked the gaudy teenager across the face with his right palm before socking him in the jaw with his left. But damn it, Kyou suddenly felt his knees give out from beneath him when Yuki knocked him backward, onto the floor, and pawed the left side of the orange-haired teens face while straddling his chest.

 

"Bad kitty," Yuki purred, pawing him again, sticking out his tongue. "I'm going to punish you by leaving unsatisfied."

 

"UNSATISFED?" Kyou choked, not comfortable with their closeness. "YA DAMN RAT, GET THE HELL OFF'A ME!"

 

"As you wish," Yuki smirked, saying that Princess Bride line with a little slur again, bowing his head down in a mock formality. Standing with a little hop, Yuki padded/skipped again from the room singing a nursery rhyme before claiming he was going to go get laid. Kyou imagined Haru jumping the boys sloppy bones just on the deck outside.

 

And the orange hair teen made a mental note NOT to go outside even if he head strangled screams and the Black One's voice. The bastard would get what he deserved. (Not that Kyou believed his drunken cousin deserved to get molested, but he reasoned, it would teach the boy a lesson in personal bubbles and unwanted affection.)

 

"Kyou you're pretty."

 

A tan chin angled itself backwards, meeting the ever-more hazy gaze of his brunette roommate. Crimson eyes narrowed sharply as a blush crossed darkening cheeks. Tohru didn't have her shirt on. And, fuck, she was unclasping the back of her bra.

 

"STOP!" Pretty kitty demanded, spinning-jumping to his feet, glancing down at the half-naked girl kneeled at the place just above where his head had been. She blinked up at him, in her innocent drunken way, and dropped her arms.

 

"Why?" she inquired, tilting her head so her hair fell over her shoulder, half-covering a breast that was slightly exposed in that lacy, black, push-up bra Ayame had acquired and forced upon the girl. "I thought boys liked boobs."

 

She wasn't slurring quite as much, and her voice wasn't quite as uneasy and high, but she certainly couldn't have been sober. Not sober enough to agree to sex, anyway.

 

It was that last thought that kept Kyou's dick in his pants and his eyes off of her chest.

 

"She's my beautiful innocent, flower!" Shigure's spirit whispered to the mind not exactly on the teen's shoulders. "Deflower her and I'll be sure Akito gets her fair share of your ASS."

 

"Some boys do like -swallow- boobs," Kyou said uneasily, his tone coming out softer than usual. "But Tohru, you don't have to do that. Not for me."

 

She put on that pout again, her swollen lips protruding out farther than they usually did.

 

"Then how do I get you into my pants, Kyou? Do you want me to touch you?"

 

Oh, he had a full blown hard on now. So he FUCKING turned as quickly as his cat FUCKING reflexes could FUCKING make him FUCKING move.

 

OoOoohhhh shit. Everything seemed to scream FUCK at him now.

 

"I - ahh - think you should maybe -ahhhh - get ta sleep, Toe-ahhhhhh-roo."

 

Everything time an "ahh" came out of his lips, it sounding like a suppressed moan, it got the image of the brunette under him, or on top of him, or ahhhh her all sweaty and back pounding into the FUCKING kitchen floor.

 

"Are you okay, Kyou?" Tohru inquired. Every vibration of the floor send a shitload of electricity from the balls of his bare feet to his dick as she stood and padded behind him. When her fingers slid down his spine he nearly came all the way from the very place she was touching with those delicious fingers.

 

 

"I'm. Fine." He replied, voice tight. Wishing with all his mighty-cat might that the girl would leave so he could finish himself off. Not that it would take a lot. He was already ready to go now.

 

"Let meeeee," Tohru purred, hand tracing along his side and across his waist, fingers splaying across Kyou's taunt stomach that convulsed at her feather touch as she traveled farther south, nearly at…

 

"TOHRU!" Kyou squeaked, very girly like, as he jumped away from her, slightly ashamed at the knowing fact that if she had just moved even an inch farther, he probably would have ground his happy-place into her hand through his pants before probably bumping back into her and turning himself into his pretty-kitty self.

 

Well, maybe that wouldn't have been so bad. Then he could have been a cat and you can't really tell when a cat has a boner, right? Then maybe drunken Tohru would have tried to stop being with him inappropriately and maybe then drunken Tohru would have just wandered off and fell asleep on the dining table only a room away.

 

He considered turning around and hugging her. Not too much scarring would have ensued on her part. She probably wouldn't remember it touching her for a brief moment when she woke up in the morning.

 

And if she did - well, Kyou was a good liar.

 

"You bastard," Tohru was hissing. "You BASTARD!"

 

Oh fuck, he was being tackled now. Turned and tackled, and the brunette was on top of him, straddling his chest the way Yuki had been. Her breasts were pretty much falling out of her bra, and her hair was all around her flushed face in a way that made her look like she'd been doin' some serious nasty. Her ass was so dangerously close to the tent in his pants, which in turn made Kyou pant, pant like some dog.

 

"Why don't you want me?" Tohru demanded, spit falling across Kyou's red cheeks. "WHY?"

 

He wanted to push her off, push her away and run, run, run. But, the fear of her accidentally sliding back on his erection in that push made him freeze. He didn't know what to say, so he just dug his teeth into his lower lip and prayed she'd get up before he lost control.

 

"I have needs too," Tohru explained, sighing, shoulders slumping forward so her arms upper arms came inward and pressed her breasts together, nearly freeing the left one from the bra. "I have needs like boys do. I want to be touched. I want to feel like I'm wanted and needed by someone."

 

OH HOLY HELL. Tohru was out of her mind. Or maybe Kyou was the one out of his mind, because he responded with probably the worse thing he could have said.

 

"Move back and feel that yer wanted., Tohru"

 

Kyou flinched and moaned when Tohru lifted her hips and moved back, pressing her lower half slightly into his. Her cheeks suddenly exploded even more into color, and she smiled softly, like a child.

 

"Oh."

 

She then responded by grounding her hips downward into him, circling her pelvis.

 

He damn near screamed her name. No fucking way that chick could be a virgin. No way in hell. Not with that trick that nearly made him cum all over her through his cargo's.

 

"I read 'bout that," she grinned, slurring, moving back onto his thighs, parallel to his it. "It's better if yer inside me, though."

 

It took all self-control with that one, too. Lord, he never knew he was this good at keeping it from exploding all over the place. Then again, he'd never really tried. He moaned and bucked his hips up a little bit, though he was weighed down by Tohru's body. Kyou felt animalistic, his eyes growing wide with the desire had tried so hard to contain.

 

"Let'me fix it, b-by," Tohru purred, much, much like Kyou's inner cat, "Let me make you cummm."

 

She was reaching for the zipper of his pants, her fingers wiggling all drunken like in excitement, when someone bust through the door in the kitchen, singing.

 

 

"High school girls, high school girls, all fur me… high… school…"

 

Shigure stopped singing and glanced down, eyeing the place where Tohru's hands had nearly fallen on, but had frozen mid-air. A smile crept onto his perverted lips as the dog took a step in and quickly slid-shut the door. He nodded once in approval before saying with a nod.

 

"Oh please, don't stop on account of me entering the room, little flower. Let me see what you can do."

 

 

Oh, and Tohru did.

 

Until Kyou hit Shigure upside the head with Yuki's sake bottle and knocked him out less than a half a minute later, when Tohru - in her slowed, drunken animation - had yet to touch him.

 

"Lets go to bed, Tohru," Kyou suggested blandly, not knowing where the question came from in his brain mind. Because, of course, it had came from IT'S mind.

 

"Um, bed sounds nice," Tohru whispered, not really meaning sex but meaning sleep, as she groaned and fell forward a bit, getting two fist full's of KYOU-GOODNESS in her hands without even really realizing it.

 

Interesting things ensued, mainly that noise that rose from the orange haired teens chest that almost sounded like an extremely loud mew, before suddenly oblivious Tohru retracted her hands and got up, swaying while her bra straps fell over her shoulders, exposing both breasts as she dragged her feet from the kitchen and up the stairs, to her bedroom where she entered and shut the door with a slam.

 

And Kyou lay all messy on the kitchen floor. Alone and cold.

 

Go figure.

 

[AU: So I totally meant this to be more… funny than sexy. So hopefully ya'll found the humor in Tohru trying to be a little ho. Lol.]

 

[1]; SAFE SEX, BABY. ^_^