Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Fire Doesn't Burn Like Ice ❯ Chapter 1

I don't own anything but my own ideas.

 

XXX

 

Yuki bit back a sigh, strangling it in his throat before it wormed his way past his lips. His arms were sore from carrying the groceries and this plant all the way back from the store, he could feel the difficulty breathing building up in his chest, which the hot, dry, early fall air didn't help. Student council had run late again today, and then he had gone straight from school to pick up Tohru from her job. It wasn't any big deal, seeing as it was basically on his way anyway, but she was still promising her left arm to thank him. Instead of going home, Tohru announced that they didn't have enough things for dinner, and Yuki didn't feel like explaining that Kyo would probably make something for himself because they were already late and Shigure was at the main house. At the store, his cough turned irritating with the cold air in the freezer isle as Tohru chose Kyo's favorite fish carefully, and now the plant in his arms was irritating his throat even more. Catnip. Tohru had said something about Uo getting a new kitten. He wasn't sure; he hadn't really been paying attention by that time. And now he still had to go home and do his homework before bed. It would be after midnight by the time he actually got to sleep, and that was if he didn't eat that night.

 

He bit back another sigh and forced himself not to rub his eyes in aggravation. He knew if he did Tohru would pick up on his bad mood and immediately jump to the conclusion that it was her fault, even if it wasn't. Too bad it was this time. He wasn't blaming her, he never did, but something kept reminding him that if he'd just gone home instead of gone to pick her up… he wished he could shut his mind up better.

 

“Yuki, what would you like for dinner?” Tohru asked happily, despite how long she'd been going today too. Yuki had to keep telling himself that she'd been going as long as he had to avoid picking up his pace and leaving her behind in order to get home quicker. Why did girls always walk so slowly? Kisa and Kagura were the same way, well, Kagura if Kyo wasn't around.

 

“I can do rice quickly, I know it's late. I'm sorry you came to pick me up, I would have gone to the store myself—”

 

“Miss Honda,” Yuki cut her off quickly before another round of thanks and apologies bombarded his ears. He couldn't handle any more tonight, in the morning he would listen to her and assure her it was no trouble, but he couldn't deal with it now.

 

“If it would be all right, do you think you could make something with the peppers from the garden? Before they go bad.”

 

“Oh my gosh! Is it already that late?! I'm sorry! I would have picked them sooner—”

 

“That's all right, Miss Honda,” Yuki closed his eyes, willing his patience to stay in place. He didn't think it was possible to be this tired and still awake. “I didn't feel like eating them earlier, but they sound good tonight, if you wouldn't mind picking them.”

 

“Of course!” Tohru smiled happily as they walked in the front door. “I'm sorry, Yuki, but could you put the catnip in my room?”

 

“Of course,” Yuki smiled, waiting until she was gone into the woods for the peppers before he dropped it, his fatigue showing clearly in his eyes.

 

Yuki trekked up the stairs, holding the box delicately. It was small, no bigger than the size of a shoebox, but the dirt made it heavy and Yuki was so tired he could feel himself loosing sensation in his toes. Maybe he wasn't loosing feeling in them; maybe his mind was just too tired to pick up whatever they felt. He didn't even really register what he was hearing until it was too late.

 

Kyo yanked open his door, halfway through his rant about how late it was and that there was nothing in the fridge so he couldn't even make himself something, but like Yuki, Kyo didn't register that someone was in front of him until he had walked out of his room and straight into the box in Yuki's hands.

 

Yuki stumbled back, his shoulders hitting the wall behind him as he tried to hold the box steady so the delicate plants wouldn't tip over and possibly break. The second he was sure he had a tight grip on the box again, he sent Kyo the darkest glare he could under his exhaustion. If any of the dirt had fallen on him, Yuki would have shoved the cat down the stairs. He didn't have the energy to shower tonight.

 

“Damn rat!” Kyo barked, his feet instantly apart in a fighting stance, his fists tight by his side. “Why can't you watch where you're going?!”

 

Kyo's eyes burned like fire, but before Yuki could send back the nastiest retort he could manage, Kyo's eyes suddenly went wide before his lids fluttered again for a moment, his bright red eyes going from a burning flame to a glowing ember. Yuki blinked, shocked at how fast Kyo's eyes seemed to glaze over. Further inspection told him that though Kyo's hands were still fisted, his muscles were relaxed.

 

Yuki's eyes popped when Kyo's hand suddenly snapped out of nowhere to grip his wrist, and the redhead leaned in. Yuki yanked back, pushing past his cousin in an effort to get away from him as fast as possible before something else happened, but he hadn't even been able to turn around before Kyo launched himself at Yuki, sending both of them and the box flying. Yuki landed with a grunt on the floor, dirt raining down on him and bits of the tiny white flowers landing on his shirt and tangling themselves in his hair, the box landing with a dull thud somewhere to his right, and all of a sudden Kyo's hands were at his shoulders.

 

Yuki pressed his back into the floor, trying to get away from Kyo as the cat leaned in, the same dazed and glazed over expression in his eyes. Yuki was wide-awake now. Kyo grabbing him without the apparent desire to fight had been a shock, but Kyo above him had sent a lightning bolt through Yuki, jolting him awake like he had just woken up from a week's worth of sleep.

 

Kyo's hands were firmly on his shoulders, his knees on either side of Yuki's hips, but even though Yuki cringed when Kyo leaned in, the cat didn't seem to notice him. The only thing he seemed intent on getting to—Yuki realized with horror—was the pieces of the plant on Yuki's shirt and in his hair.

 

Kyo hovered above Yuki for a moment, sniffing at the small flowers and the light green plant. When Yuki's mind finally caught on to just exactly what was going on and where he was in relation to Kyo, his hands jumped to Kyo's shoulders. He braced his back against the floor so he could put as much power as he needed into the throw, when a loud gasp erupted from his throat as Kyo's nose suddenly nuzzled at a catnip leaf on his neck.

 

“Kyo, stop!” Yuki yelled, trying to shove his cousin away, but the start from the contact had knocked all of the power from his arms. He couldn't throw Kyo off of him, not until he got his bearings at least, and when Kyo's tongue found another part of the catnip plant on his collarbone and sent a jolt of electricity through his mind, rendering his arm useless, it seemed that would never happen.

 

Yuki squeezed his eyes shut, considering yelling for help when Kyo carefully pulled a flower from Yuki's hair with his teeth, chewing it before he swallowed, when he remembered that he was alone in the house. Even if he wasn't, he didn't think he could handle the humiliation. Shigure would never let him live this down if he was here, Kyo pinning him to the ground like a cat above helpless baby rat.

 

“Kyo!” Yuki yelled again, trying to get his knees through Kyo's to use the leverage and shove him away, but even though he was awake now, his body was still bogged down with exhaustion. He didn't have the strength.

 

Kyo's nose nuzzled Yuki's neck again, making him twitch, when all of a sudden the cat leaned up just a little bit, and his tongue flicked right under Yuki's jawbone.

 

Yuki couldn't explain what happened. Another bolt of electricity, his arms almost going limp again, but the thing that truly shocked him beyond his thinking at the time was that something had jumped behind his naval. Kyo hadn't stopped nuzzling and licking him during the time that he had frozen, and to Yuki's surprise, his skin almost started to buzz with the touch, something behind his naval leaping erratically, like he was falling.

 

The sound of the front door opening gave Yuki the strength he needed, and with one heave he threw Kyo off of him, scrambling back before someone came in and saw them like this.

 

“Yuki! I have the peppers!” Tohru called from the stairs. The sound of her coming and Yuki throwing him back must have woken Kyo up, and he was now pressed against the far wall, his hand over his mouth and nose, his eyes wide. Yuki didn't think he was breathing for fear of smelling the catnip yet. Yuki wasn't entirely sure that he was breathing either.

 

And his skin was still buzzing pleasantly.

 

“Yuki?” Tohru called, appearing at the top of the stairs. It took her about ten full seconds to realize what she was looking at before she exploded.

 

“AH! OH MY GOSH! WHAT HAPPENED?! ARE YOU BOTH OK?! WERE YOU FIGHTING AGAIN?!”

 

Yuki steeled his face, clenching his fists as he pushed himself off the ground and dusted the dirt off of his shirt. “The stupid cat ran into me,” he said vapidly, past Tohru down the stairs. “I'm sorry Miss Honda, I'll go get a broom and I'll replace your plant.”

 

He tried to ignore it, but even his legs were buzzing, making his trip down the stairs a little wobbly. He also couldn't seem to block out Tohru calling for a response from Kyo multiple times before he reached the kitchen and couldn't hear them anymore; Kyo hadn't said anything.

 

Three Days Later

 

I did not like it.

 

He didn't. But that was the only explanation as to why he kept remembering that his mind could come up with.

 

No. He didn't like it.

 

…But it was also the only explanation he could come up with as to why his manhood literally jumped when Kyo ran his tongue across Yuki's neck. If it hadn't been Kyo… he might have really liked it. Except that he didn't. He just didn't.

 

It was Kyo. The cat. The spirit that had hated his for generations. There was no way in seven hells that he could have done anything but be disgusted by it.

 

…So why did he wake up wishing Kyo would do it again? Run his tongue and nose across Yuki's skin. Put his hands on Yuki's shoulders. Nuzzle into his collar and neck. And Yuki could have sworn he heard a light rumbling from Kyo's chest, and because of the cat relation to the catnip, Yuki could only think that it had been a purr. With all of the yelling Kyo did… Yuki almost wanted to hear him purr again—no he didn't.

 

Yuki had always had sort of a “greater respect” for Hatori, more than anyone else. Only now, because of what Kyo did, was he considering that he might have felt that for Hatori because…

 

There was no way he was gay. It was impossible. He was the rat. The perfect spirit of the zodiac. And Tohru was… Tohru was what? His friend? A very close one, but… that was really all she was. A friend who accepted him and always tried to be there for him, who always tried to make sure he was ok.

 

He hadn't felt that way for Hatori for a long time, but now that he thought about it, he really could have been… for Hatori…

 

Was it possible? Was he really gay? Had he really been into Hatori years ago?

 

But then what about Kyo? Yuki pressed his hand over his mouth, pretending he was just trying to cover the oversized bite he had accidentally taken. Ever since the incident three days ago, Kyo had been nowhere. He went to school early, left school without anyone to get home, was always on the roof or in his room, and to Yuki's knowledge, he hadn't come down to eat in those three days just to avoid him.

 

“Kyo isn't coming down again?” Tohru asked. It sounded like she was close to tears with worry now that he hadn't been down to eat in three days. He never took the food left outside his door, and he wouldn't answer when Tohru knocked. And it irked Yuki that Kyo would do that to Tohru just because he was mad about what happened.

 

Yuki looked over as he finally swallowed his bit—several rounds of chewing after he should have swallowed—and sighed. She was about to cry. He could see that in her eyes and the way her hands were clasped tightly around the table edge.

 

“It isn't your fault Miss Honda, Kyo might just not feel like eating,” he said, keeping his voice as steady as possible. His voice was jumping again, along with his skin buzzing. There it was again, the feeling of Kyo's nose nuzzling into his neck, right by his shoulder. Yuki immediately stamped on the feeling.

 

“You don't think he's sick, do you?” Her voice had cracked.

 

Yuki sighed again and put down his chopsticks. He grabbed a tray from the counter and loaded a plate of food onto it. He waited for a moment for Shigure to see something, but the dog had his nose buried in the newspaper, even though Yuki knew he wanted to say something, so he left before Shigure could decide to say it. If it was taking the dog that long to decide whether or not to let it out of his mouth, it wasn't anything Yuki wanted to hear. He knew what Shigure would say anyway.

 

Yuki shifted the tray to one arm outside of Kyo's door before knocking, though he wasn't sure why he did. He never had before. When Kyo didn't answer—as he'd been expecting—Yuki just closed his eyes and willed the feeling of Kyo's nose away before he pushed open the door.

 

Kyo whirled to the sound of the door opening, and at the sight of Yuki he almost flew to the other side of the room to get away from him.

 

Yuki's eyes narrowed and he set the tray down on the floor. “I don't have anymore catnip, and I washed my clothes and showered the first second I had.”

 

“I'm not scared!” Kyo shot back haughtily. Yuki bit into his lip, smothering the smile dawning on his face. Odd. It was almost a relief to hear Kyo's voice after three silent days with none of his yelling. But he didn't like it. He didn't.

 

“Eat. Miss Honda is worried that you're sick,” he said simply before walking out, but before he could shut the door, Kyo had appeared behind him with the tray in his hands. At first Yuki thought Kyo was going to try and give the tray back, but when he said nothing and kept his eyes diverted, Yuki turned back around and kept on down the stairs, Kyo following behind him. Some things were better not to question.

 

“Well, how on earth did Yuki get Kyo down here when even our sweet Tohru couldn't?” Shigure was smiling. He'd finally said what he was holding back earlier, and from the happy smile on his face, he was enjoying this.

 

Stupid dog. Yuki sat down heavily and picked up his rice, starting to nibble on it, but he should have known Shigure wouldn't shut up.

 

“Or more importantly, why?”

 

Yuki almost choked. There was no way the dog would know, he couldn't, but even though Yuki knew he couldn't Shigure's snake-oil merchant tone still sent shivers up his spine. What if someone found out? Kyo looked frozen in front of his food too, but at least it wasn't showing on his face.

 

“Oh, I-I don't know,” Tohru said, trying to be helpful and keep the fights to a minimum. “I'm just glad Kyo isn't sick, o-or still mad, or…” She wasn't helping, thought it was still sweet of her to try. Yuki managed a smile in her direction, even while choking silently on his rice, willing it down his throat before he died of suffocation.

 

“Thank you, Yuki,” she smiled again.

 

“Yes, we must all thank the rat for returning our cat to us, I know we all missed him,” Shigure said again, looking pointedly at Yuki. Of course, this flew twenty feet over Tohru's head, though neither Yuki nor Kyo missed it, and the shock from the sentence jolted the rice down Yuki's throat so he could at least breathe.

 

Yuki shot a warning glare at Kyo out of the corners of his eyes, daring him to say anything that might give what had happened away. No one could find out.

 

Instead, Kyo—just as flustered—just snapped, “Shut up, you damn dog!” his bowl tight in his hand.

 

“There is nothing strange with me going to retrieve him for Tohru. She was worried and it wasn't right for him to scare her, and you certainly weren't doing anything to help but say stupid things,” Yuki said stiffly, taking another bite of rice.

 

“Maybe it's because our dear rat doesn't hate the cat as much as he says,” Shigure offered innocently. Yuki glared, but like normal, it did nothing to faze his older cousin.

 

“Maybe your hate is just a cover up for your love for him, Yuki.”

 

Because of his thought process earlier, before he had gone to get Kyo, instead of brushing the idea away as easily as he would have anything else, he considered it.

 

That was all it took.

 

Yuki believed Shigure, even shadowed with doubt he believed and considered what the dog said, just for that spilt second, but that was all it took.

 

That spilt second was all it took, and Yuki's heart spluttered in his chest, like it couldn't believe either, that he had just fallen hard for Kyo.

 

His food was frozen halfway to his mouth at the realization of what Shigure's little comment had done, rice falling off of his chopsticks as Shigure started to sing.

 

“Yuki and Kyo sitting in a tree! K-I-S-SI—”

 

Before Kyo's own return was even past his voice box, Yuki had dumped his rice bowl over Shigure's head and calmly left the room.

 

Well, he looked calm; inside he was shaking like his heart was creating an earthquake in his chest, a hurricane of emotions, horrors and recognition. He was in love with Kyo, the cat of the cursed Chinese zodiac.

 

One Week Later

 

Yuki tried to smother his feelings. But they made his heart leap and his vision go fuzzy in ways he had never felt before. It was an addiction; his body wouldn't let him ignore his feelings once he had felt them. Every time Kyo walked by, Yuki's heart would splutter and he would instantly walk the other direction just to end it.

 

He tried to ignore Kyo. He tried not to look at him during everything. The way he held his chopsticks during meals, the way he walked on the way to school and back—clumsy or not, Kyo really was graceful even with small movements like walking, truly like the cat—coming out of the bath with just a towel on—that had only happened once and Yuki had made damn sure since that it wouldn't happen again. He could only get so red from blushing before his head popped off of his shoulders.

 

He stuttered when he saw the tanned inch of stomach under Kyo's black t-shirt, the one that was just too small for him; and he couldn't get over how cute Kyo looked when he yawned. Yuki was never up early enough to see Kyo yawn then, and he himself was too tired to even yawn in the morning, but at night Kyo would yawn, the tiredness creeping up on him. Yuki wondered what it was like, to start feeling just a little bit tired. After years with Akito's visits and “punishments”, Yuki had learned to block out everything expect what he needed to stay out of danger. He was awake, and then he was smashed over the head with just how tired he really was. He had wondered, if he had shut everything else out, then why did his heart leap when he was around Kyo? But the he remembered he had never felt anything like this before, not with Akito shutting him down like an animal, a pet or a slave at every turn. His body wasn't accustomed to this emotion; he didn't know how to barricade himself against it to protect himself from Akito.

 

And Yuki was determined to learn how to choke these feelings. Even before he knew himself sometimes, Akito knew. He couldn't risk Akito finding this out. Every chance he got to get away from Kyo, he took, so presently he was at the grocery store again with Tohru as she fussed over what spices to buy for the beef that night.

 

Yuki turned, surveying the store so no little girls ran into him again, when something crossed his vision. He couldn't tear his eyes away.

 

…And the worst part was that he wasn't sure he wanted to.

 

Sitting on a high shelf of the flower isle, for bouquets and such, was a small, downy green plant with tiny white flowers at its tips.

 

Yuki tried to look away, his hands clenching in his pockets, but he could already feel it. Kyo's tongue at his neck, his hands on his shoulders, his nose nuzzling into his shoulder, his tongue flicking over Yuki's collarbone. Yuki closed his eyes and let his head roll back a bit before he realized what he was doing and snapped back up.

 

The tiny white flowers kept drawing his gaze, no matter where he looked or what he looked at. A three year old had just pulled over an entire display of cereal and Yuki couldn't even keep his eyes on them long enough to see if someone from the store came to help them.

 

The tiny flowers were there, so small but so powerful, swaying in the September breeze coming in through the doors every time they opened. It was almost like they were calling to him—no, scratch that, that was just himself, begging him to buy the plant, to be able to feel the touch again that he had never felt before. Akito had touched him, but it was never like that. Never.

 

And… he did want to feel it again. He wanted Kyo to touch him, to hold him, to pin him down again if necessary.

 

With that thought, not allowing himself to think anymore about it just incase he had second thoughts, he picked the plant up off the shelf and pinched a sprig off, tucking it in his shirt pocket before he handed the plant to Tohru.

 

“For the one Kyo and I broke,” he explained at he perplexed expression.

 

“Oh no! It was ok! I didn't mind! Really!” Tohru blubbered instantly, waving her hands in front of her like a lunatic.

 

“Please, Miss Honda. I feel bad for destroying your plant. At least take it for Miss Uotani's cat.”

 

Tohru blinked for a moment before smiling hugely and nodding, taking the plant from him and placing it in her basket. Just before it left his fingers, a thank you slipped through his lips quiet enough for no one to hear, and he could have sworn he saw it nod when Tohru put it down, but that could have just been another breeze coming through the open doors.

 

Later

 

Yuki watched Tohru as she left, waiting until she was up the driveway before he turned for this stairs.

 

…This is stupid. I'm such an idiot; I have to take this stupid plant out of my shirt. I'll just chuck it out the window when I get to my room, I can't do this. Maybe I'll put it Kyo's food to get rid of it. If he acts out again, at least Tohru will think it's because he loves her food. Almost as an apology for making Kyo miss all of those days of her cooking.

 

Yuki was so busy kicking himself for even buying the plant in the first place that he hadn't even noticed Kyo coming down the stairs. Not until the cat had slowed to a stop at his side, his head tipped in the air, did Yuki notice. He pressed a hand over the sprig in his shirt pocket, not daring to move until Kyo had, but he hadn't wanted Kyo to move toward him.

 

Kyo was looking around in confusion, and it only took Yuki a second to realize he was sniffing the air. He's already smelled it.

 

That thought was fortified when Kyo's eyes suddenly glazed over and he leaned toward Yuki, his arms hanging limply by his side. Yuki didn't dare move an inch. And out of nowhere, Kyo swooned, tipping backwards on the stairs. Yuki instinctively knew that Kyo would have been able to take the fall, but his hand still shot out and grabbed Kyo's arm to keep him from sprawling down the stairs. Kyo tipped forward again suddenly and grabbed onto Yuki's shirt needily, making them stumble back into the wall.

 

Yuki instantly grabbed Kyo's shoulders and tried to shove him back. Kyo would regret it later; he would wish he were dead. Last time he didn't come down in three days, what would he do this time?

 

He braced his foot against the wall, going to throw Kyo back if that was what it took, when Kyo suddenly dipped down and nuzzled Yuki's shirt pocket, brushing over his hardened nipple, and it was all Yuki would do to choke down a moan.

 

Yuki shook his head with a snarl, determined not to lose his bearings and grabbed Kyo's shirt to throw him back down the stairs when Kyo nibbled on his neck.

 

Yuki latched onto Kyo's shirt, unconsciously pulling the cat into his body, his eyes wide from the shock of how gentle Kyo's teeth had been against his skin. It almost… tickled it was so gentle.

 

He'll hate it!

 

That thought gave his arms the jolt they needed, and he hurled Kyo back, tearing the cat's grip off of his shirt and flinging him back into the opposite wall. When Kyo's head cracked against the wall, Yuki winced but Kyo's eyes flashed with life again, and in a second Kyo had gripped the banister and covered his mouth and nose with a hand so tightly Yuki was sure he couldn't breathe.

 

The new emotion behind Kyo's eyes made Yuki wince again, and he flew up the stairs before Kyo said something.

 

There had been horror in Kyo's eyes.

 

Idiot! He was such an idiot! He knew Kyo would hate it from last time, why would he… what possible possessed him to want to do it again?!

 

Yuki slammed his door behind him, only to whirl back around when the sound of the wood snapping into skin and Kyo's, “Ow! Damn it!” echoed around his room.

 

Yuki watched warily while Kyo shook out his hand to relieve it of the pain, before those red hot, angry eyes snapped to him. There was no horror now, just rage and confusion.

 

…I'm such an idiot.

 

“Why the hell did you do that?!” Kyo roared suddenly, his fists tight by his side, his feet in a fighting stance.

 

…I don't know.

 

Yuki didn't have an answer for Kyo even if he had been able to force on up his throat. He steeled his expression, envisioning himself as a rock, and glared back at Kyo, which only pissed the cat off more.

 

That's right, a rock, that's what he needed to be. To hide from Akito. To keep himself safe. From hurt, from pain, from everything. He needed to be a rock. No feelings. He felt nothing for Kyo.

 

“You knew what would happen because of last time!” Kyo continued hotly, taking another step into Yuki's room and forcing the rat back. “With that damn plant in the damn hall… way…”

 

Kyo trailed off, his eyes going wide with realization, which only horrified Yuki.

 

No! He can't know! There is nothing!

 

“You… knew what would happen…”

 

“So what if I did?!” Yuki snapped, smothering the desperation in his voice as he shoved his way past Kyo and into the hallway when Kyo grabbed his arm, forcing him back around.

 

“Then why did you…?” Kyo asked quietly. Yuki dipped his head, waiting until Kyo dropped his arm before he dashed down the stairs and outside.

 

His garden, he could go to the garden… he needed to think. To figure out how he was going to destroy these feelings. It wasn't enough to hide them, he couldn't, they were too powerful. He'd never felt anything like it before, and now he couldn't hold it back. Maybe Hatori, if he didn't tell Akito, could erase his memories that the incident had ever happened.

 

Four Days Later

 

The last few days had been very awkward. Both had avoided each other to the point where Yuki came home from school, went straight to his garden and didn't physically walk into the house until he was sure Kyo would be in his room or on the roof. For the times he was in the house to keep Tohru from worrying too much, Kyo was nowhere to be seen except for the occasional appearance by the fridge before he went upstairs. They both went to dinner for Tohru's sake, to show that they weren't sick or didn't like her cooking anymore, both of which she would worry about, but neither said anything. It was almost like they weren't there for the other. To Shigure and Tohru it seemed the two of them wanted to look at each other about as much as they wanted to meet eyes with Medusa.

 

Yuki spoke to Tohru and occasionally Shigure. Kyo spoke even less, but then it was only to Tohru and to yell at Shigure for something stupid he said. They never talked or looked at each other at school. Kyo was up and off to school usually even before Yuki was awake. Yuki took Tohru to the store and Kyo would do whatever he needed to when they were gone.

 

It was like Kyo didn't exist, and that made it easier for Yuki to kill the feelings struggling for life in his chest. They were like fire in his veins, a fire that had ignited like wildfire when Kyo had first touched Yuki and had fought to keep burning, to let him keep feeling the touches and feelings burning in his chest, but now Kyo was gone and Yuki was dousing the fire, making it splutter like embers and coals.

 

Yuki was sitting in his room, looking over the vocab for that week and trying to commit it to memory. It wasn't sticking, nothing seemed to be over the past four days, but it was getting easier. Four days ago after the incident on the stairs, Yuki hadn't even been able to process what had been said to him. it took two or three times of repeating a single question for him to understand it and form an answer. Now he was remembering what people asked him at the beginning of the day so they could go over it again at the end of the day during the student council meeting.

 

Except for the vocab. The vocab was just not fixing in his mind no matter how many times he read over it.

 

His door banged open suddenly, and Yuki whirled, his eyes going wide as he saw Kyo snarling from the doorway.

 

Kyo just looked back at him, his lip pulled back to reveal his slightly sharper canines, before he stepped in and slammed the door behind him again. Yuki wasn't sure if he could move, he was to busy staring into Kyo's eyes, burning like the flame trying to catch again in his heart. He doused it with thoughts of Akito, pushing it back until it was almost as inexistent as it had been before, and made sure his voice was flat before he said, “What?” as calmly as he could.

 

Rockets were going off behind his eyes, and he was buzzing in his skin again, something in him trying to get him to touch Kyo again, to feel the warmth and fire from Kyo's lips and hands, but he couldn't let any of that show. He needed to destroy any existence of the feelings. He felt nothing.

 

And then Kyo growled again, pressing a hand over his eyes as he leaned back into the wall.

 

“Ever since that thing four days ago,” he spat, cutting off quickly like he didn't know how to finish what he wanted to say.

 

There is nothing to feel. Numb. Cold. Blank. There is nothing to feel. Yuki repeated to himself over and over again, forcing images of Akito through his head. The fire was dying again, spluttering and flickering in him, but it was dying, getting smaller by the second.

 

And then Kyo said it.

 

“I can't get you out of my goddamn head!”

 

The fire roared up again, streaking through Yuki's heart and shooting to every corner of his body. He tried to smother it, but even his thoughts of Akito were burned away with the heat of memories of Kyo. Kyo's fiery eyes as the cat yelled at him. Kyo's fist flying for his face. Kyo's eyes as he stared at Yuki during one of their fights.

 

And then the ones that had fueled his emotions from the beginning. Kyo's hands on his shoulders, his knees on either side of Yuki's waist. Kyo's glazed eyes as he stared into Yuki's, the catnip drugging his mind. Kyo's lips in his hair, pulling a small white flower from his silver locks. Kyo's lips and teeth on his neck as he nibbled at Yuki's skin for the taste of the catnip. Kyo's lips around his chest, grazing his nipple as he tried to get the plant from Yuki's pocket. Kyo's tongue on his neck.

 

And then Kyo moved his hand from his eyes, looking back at Yuki with pain in his eyes.

 

The same pain Yuki felt.

 

Any desire to delete what had happened from his mind incinerated in the fire in his chest at that second.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What'ch'yall think? Good? Bad? Piece of crap? Bulldozer material? Sent from god? (I don't believe, but whatever… ¬ ¬)

Tell me if you liked it or not!