Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Inner Self ❯ Inner Self ( Chapter 1 )

How fast can you guess whose point of view this is told from? You should be able to figure out who they're talking about even quicker.

 

Note: I'm only to manga vol. 13, plus all the anime, so I don't really know how the series actually ends; I don't know for sure how the Jyuunishi curse could truly be broken.. This wanted to be written, though--so I'm gonna be optimistic and assume the curse does get broken, at the last minute, on the day that Yuki, Tohru, and Kyo graduate from high school.

 

Note for FF.net readers--Grrr; still haven't figured out how to properly fudge in double punctuation (combined/multiple exclamation points and question marks). I'll probably figure out a decent way just as they finally change things to allow it! ::sigh:: Until then, adding a period between them seems to work, though it just doesn't look quite right. It's just doesn't read the same without the extra emotional emphasis, though! ::frustrated grinding of teeth through a more ragged sigh:: At least MM.org doesn't mess with my punctuation!

 

--Good Lord, this whole thing's under 1,400 words!.! ::keels over in a dead faint from the shock::

 

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, it's characters or settings or anything else.

 

Enjoy!

 

Inner Self

-CrazyDragon

 

No. No! NO!!

 

Damn you! Why did you have to do it? It's out of my hands now...there's nothing I can do to save you, fool boy! Don't you realize that?!!

 

Ah; you know it now, don't you. I can see the fear shining in your bloody eyes like twin bonfires, consuming all your useless rage. It's such a shame, that fiery temper of yours being so out of your control. If only you were strong enough to resist it...

 

...if only you were strong enough to save yourself...

 

But you're not, are you. You never will be. And so, the wager is made; and you will suffer...

 

...and I will suffer with you, in secret...unable to alter my own cursed fate; a mere observer to this miserable, cursed life...

 

-.-.-.-

 

Here you are, back again...facing that which you fear most, lurking in the shadows as closely as you are allowed. That insufferable man was right in his trust, after all...the girl did not break, as I was afraid she would.

 

Heh...they all think you're most scared of people, of letting anyone get close to you; scared of what they will think of the curse riding your soul. More fools they, the unobservant idiots. In order to fear people in that way, you'd have to first give a damn about what anyone else thought of you. No; what you fear the most, is yourself. The way those whose lives you touch--those you come to care for--seem to be destroyed, sooner or later. Mother, Father, the rare childhood friendship; any within the family who get close to you, either...go away; or began to hate you, with more ferocity than those who started out as your enemies.

 

You don't care what most others think of you any more that I do, really. People are so blinded by their own preconceived notions... You've learned the hard way, that people aren't truthful. They all lie with words, and gestures, and actions. Most of them are not truthful at all, especially in expressing their feelings about you--the outcast...the Monster of the family, all by an accident of birth. Many of them give you honeyed words and encouragement, only to yank away the things that matter most to you--acceptance; your Place in the scheme of things, your reason for being.

 

Caring...

 

You're so much like the spirit of the animal whose curse you bear. Is that why it chose you, or is it a side affect of the curse? Who can tell? All I know is how independent and self-sufficient you are, never truly needing anyone else's approval...though you do seem to desperately crave it, from some few individuals; even while desperately pretending you do not. That must be the human in you showing itself. I know there are two you care about that much, for certain; the man who chose you for a son, and the girl you oh-so-obviously--

 

--love.

 

Do you even know it, yet? That you've fallen so hard, for that--girl? Or do you flounder in a veritable sea of confusion, you who hates untamed water so much? Oh, the irony, if you haven't even consciously realized it yet! To hold the cure to this thoroughly-damned family's curse in your hands, and not to even recognize it--

 

Damn you!! You hold all of our salvation; all you have to do is reach for that which you desire most in all the world! Why won't you?! Tell her; idiot, fool!! Even I can see how much your feelings are returned! How can you possibly miss it?!! I know how much intelligence lurks behind those fiery eyes, hidden within that perpetual anger!

 

...That damned wager. That's it, isn't it? That damn-fool bet you made...that is what will seal the fate of the Jyuunishi-cursed for yet another generation; that is what dooms us to never be freed. A moment of foolishness in childhood, that scars for life...

 

...I don't feel well. I need Hatori...where are you, Dragon who heals...? Not that you could ever heal this wound of the soul that I bear...

 

-.-.-.-

 

Is it time...? Already? I'd thought there was another year left. Oh, well. You were unable to do it, after all...how disappointing. Such a shame... you fool. So now it's time to meet your fate, the fate of all those who have ever borne your curse.

 

Are you ready, my Monster...?

 

What...is this...? What is this?! You dared to bring her into my presence, without permission or warning?!! I'll not have it!! You'll not taunt me with your inexcusable failure--

 

--It...cannot...be...! Could it be possible? At long last?! You openly hold her hand; your look is defiant, you're refusing--

 

Oh, this is rich; this is hilarious. Can it be...you have no clue...?! Insisting you've finally beaten your cousin, by winning this girl's heart...as if that matters a whit! Fool boy! That wager meant nothing; it was merely the Curse's way of setting you up, to foil its cure! Which is suddenly, amazingly--so--close--!!

 

Say it, you foolish boy! SAY IT!! Say what is in your heart, to this girl--speak it out loud, damn you; we're so close--!!

 

Oh...

 

You said it. You finally--said it! But...now...

 

It--oh!--I didn't think...it would hurt; not this much! Ah, my healing Dragon; you cannot help me with this pain, though I do thank you for trying. In spite of all I have done to you. I don't know if I shall survive this, or not. Will you miss me, if I go?

 

Will any of them miss me...? My Jyuunishi...?

 

Or will they celebrate my absence? I could hardly blame them, if they do. I've lived my entire life as an observer, rarely allowed even enough control over my own body to speak. There must have been something I could have done differently, though...I should have tried harder; made myself sicker more often, to protect the lot of you from the curse's cruel machinations...

 

Oh, my. Did I say that out loud? I didn't mean to. I'm so used to being the unseen, unheard one...I didn't truly realize my body was actually under my own control, now.

 

...Is this...permanent...? Is it--finally--over...?

 

Stop your foolish fussing, my Dragon; sit me up! Up, up, UP!! I cannot contain this excitement; the pain is fading, I can feel the sickness receding from my body! If you cannot help me up, then let me alone!

 

Where...where are you... There! My Monster--my Savior. You look at me with those fiery crimson eyes, defiant still... Now you are confused. Well you should be; I don't think I have ever smiled like this in my life, with true joy. I've certainly never felt like this; never known this freedom--this sense of well-being!

 

Oh, silly boy; standing between me and your chosen one...I'm not going to hurt her; not now, not ever again! Rather, I'm going to thank her, for having such a kind and generous heart...that she could love those cursed to live un-loved.

 

Thank her...and give the two of you my blessing. Congratulations, Kyo-kun...welcome to the Sohma family, Tohru-chan.

 

Come now, Kyo-kun...close that gaping mouth. Here, I'll help you; there you go. Now, scoot! Off with you! Don't give me that glare; your fiancée and I need to have a session of girl-talk, and you and Hatori-kun will have no interest in it whatsoever. You'll be bored to tears within minutes. Eh, Tohru-chan?

 

Oh, my...you didn't expect that, did you? That look on your face--heh heh heh, oh dear, heh heh! Priceless! I can't stop laughing! You'd best sit down before your legs give out on you! And dear Hatori--have you swallowed something the wrong way? Heh heh heh! Tohru-chan, you're smiling so brightly--you understand, now; don't you. Would you do me the favor of hugging that irascible young man of yours? I don't think he believes we're free now.

 

Free...

 

We're...free...!