Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ No Regrets ❯ Benediction ( Chapter 5 )

Disclaimer: This piece of work is not to be sold in any from. There's no authorization by Takaya Natsuki or Hana to Yume Comics. It's only for personal reading.

Author's comments: Thanks to all the people who reviewed! You really encouraged me to continue! And special thanks to Carla VII. You're really great in helping me with my fiction and correcting my mistakes.

Rating: R - lemon contents (varying according to chapter)

No Regrets

V. Benediction

... did you really believe … naïve cunt … slut … useless … not admit … away … sneak in … never … never … NEVER …

Shreds of the previous conversation spun through her head. She ran through the streets, aimless, without knowing where she was nor how much time had passed. Rain had soaked through her clothes but she didn't even notice it. Tears ran down her face and dissolved into the raindrops.

If they had just run away! Then they could have stayed together! But now she was facing a decision that was almost impossible for her to make.

Akito had raged. He had yelled at her and cursed her. She had stayed calm and tried to get through to him with words. But he hadn't listened and foisted a terrible choice on her. She had managed to keep her poker face until she was through the gate and on the street.

Then she hadn't been able to hold back her tears anymore. In despair, she had started running, aimless. She had just wanted to get away. Away from that terrible mansion that had caused her fear right from the beginning.

Everything, she had lost everything. No matter what she chose, there was no way out.

Sobbing and weak, she fell onto her knees. How could she explain Yuki what decision Akito had dumped upon her? Yuki! Yuki! She had lost her fight.

The only thing left now was departure. Departure from the Sohmas, departure from Yuki. She couldn't just leave. She owed Yuki an explanation. But how could she do that? If she told him tonight he would probably go to Akito right away and that would make everything even worse. She had to be more careful.

She thought about it and made up a plan. Yes, that's how she would do it. Determined and with new energy she got up and made her way to the Sohma-house for the last time.

***************************************************

Yuki was expecting her at the door. "Where have you been for such a long time? I was worried about you!"

Quickly she made up an excuse. "I met Uo-chan on the way. We went to have a coffee."

"And your meeting with Akito? How did it go?"

"It went alright. But I don't want to talk about it right now. I have to get my thoughts in order first."

"You're totally wet! Come on in and take a hot shower so you don't get a cold!"

She tried to smile. "Yes, I will."

Slowly, she went into her room, got undressed and slipped into her dressing-gown. Then she went into the shower. The hot water felt good. She hadn't even noticed that she had been freezing.

When she returned to her room Yuki was sitting on her futon. "Can you talk now?"

She shook her head. "No. Tomorrow."

"All right. I don't want to push you. But if you want to tell me about it, please, do so!"

"I really can't do it tonight. I'm sorry. Do you want to stay with me tonight?"

Yuki looked at her, surprised. She distorted her lips and hoped it looked like a smile.

"I don't want to sleep alone, " she tried to explain.

"Of course! Did it really go well?"

"Yes, yes. Please, let's talk about something else now! I have to sleep on it for a night first."

This night would be her farewell- gift. She wanted to be with him this last time. Tears streamed down her face and she turned her head so he wouldn't notice. How badly she just needed to hold him right now and be embraced by his arms. Never, never again she would be able to be with him. Convulsively, she tried to fight her tears.

But nothing could soothe the pain she was feeling. So she got up and turned out the light so he wouldn't see the tears on her face.

She sat down next to him and took his hand. Tonight she would give him all she could give. For the first and last time she wanted to be one with him. She led his hand to her breast. With the other one she unbuttoned his shirt. Then she scooted closer to him and kissed him. Her kiss was demanding, despaired. She helped him out of his clothes and let down her dressing-gown.

Softly, she pressed him into her pillows and bowed over him. She kissed his mouth, then she covered his face with kisses. Slowly she moved down his neck. Every millimeter of his chest was touched by her lips, making their way slowly downward.

In the last weeks they had been learning a lot about each other's bodies. They had cuddled, kissed, caressed each other. She knew where she had to touch him to get him aroused.

Of course it hadn't been perfect from the start. A lot of times she had had to wait until he had turned into his human form again. But after some time those accidents had become rarer and rarer. They had learned to bypass the curse.

Lightly she kissed the top of his penis. Yuki moaned. She moved her tongue over his member. Sometimes soft as a breeze, sometimes hard and demanding. Then she took him into her mouth and sucked a little. The body below her stiffened. Playfully, she circled her tongue around his tip. With her hand she stroked shaft. He twitched with arousal.

Breathless, she sat up. She shifted her position and was now kneeling over him. To take the ability to say something from him she silenced his lips with a kiss.

Slowly and carefully she lowered her hips. She felt his manhood between her legs. When she took him inside a sharp pain passed through her. Not wanting him to notice she stopped for a moment before she let him deeper inside. The pain decreased slowly. Now she felt him inside, she was one with him. Tears of joy and sorrow flowed down her cheeks.

Cautiously she started to move up and down. Yuki moaned below her. She felt his penis inside her, filling her. If this night would only last forever!

Just when her arms started to ache from holding herself up Yuki held her lightly. "Lie down," he whispered.

She lay down next to him and opened her legs to welcome him. When she felt him between her thighs she lifted up her hips. Slowly he found his way inside her. After a short moment she found his rhythm and moved with him.

Tenderly and softly, they made love. Exactly like this she had always wanted it to be.

Her arousal was increasing. Her breath was getting faster, her heart pounded in her chest. She noticed Yuki's breath speeding up as well, his hands gripping the sheets tightly.

Soon she couldn't hold back anymore. A sweet feeling washed through her body, black stars swirled in her eyes. A split second before the orgasm exploded within her she felt Yuki's body stiffen up. Together they experienced their climax.

She lost control over her body, trembling and convulsing and overrun by waves of pleasure. From far away she heard Yuki calling her name again and again.

Then the feeling mellowed down. Wet with sweat and breathless, Yuki retreated from her and lay down beside her. He kissed her passionately. Still trying to catch her breath, Tohru kissed him back with all the love she had inside her.

When they parted their lips, Yuki fell back onto the bed, exhausted. Softly he caressed her stomach. After some time he broke the silence.

"Tohru?"

"Yes?"

"I love you!"

"I love you, too, Yuki!"

Suddenly she felt very tired. It had been a very long and terrible day. For one last time she wanted to sleep next to her lover, wanted to feel his heartbeat, hear his breath.

She lay her head on his chest just like back when they had spent their first night together. Again his heartbeat comforted and soothed her.

One last time.

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Yuki woke up early in the morning. He rolled over but the bed next to him was empty. Where was Tohru?

Confused, he sat up. There was something lying on the pillow. A letter. He tore open the envelope and started to read.

"My dearest Yuki,

I'm sorry that I have to leave you like this. But, believe me, it's best for the both of us.

It didn't go alright yesterday. Not at all. Akito yelled at me and insulted me. And he dumped a terrible choice upon me.

Both alternatives were horrible to me, but I made a decision. Believe me, it wasn't easy for me at all.

One alternative was to erase the memory of our time together. Not only mine but also yours. The other one was that I disappear from your life.

The memory of you is too dear to me. I don't want to miss a second, not even one. I never want to forget you. Never.

That's why I went away this morning. I don't know where, but somehow I'll make it. Please don't look for me.

I don't know how I'll be able to live without you but we're not allowed to be together.

I'm incredibly sorry that I didn't tell you yesterday. But if you had gone to Akito in anger you would have made it even worse. I didn't want you to feel his anger as well.

Please, don't go to see him. You can't change it anymore, and I don't want him to hurt you.

I know, I can't ease your pain. But, please, try to look into the future and forget the past.

Last night was my farewell-gift to you. I will cherish it in my heart and always think of you.

The time with you was the happiest of my life. No one can take away the memory of that time. It's the most important thing I have.

Now I'm writing this letter. You're still sleeping in my bed. I don't want to wake you because that would make leaving impossible for me. I don't want to be without you but there's no way out.

I tried to fight for our love but I wasn't strong enough.

Maybe fate will lead us together under better circumstances in our next lives.

I love you forever.

Sayonara,

Tohru"

The words swam in front of his eyes. Hot tears ran down his cheeks and dripped onto the paper. She was gone.

She was gone and wouldn't return. Paralyzed, he sat on the bed in which they had made love just a few hours ago. Unbelieving, he stared at the letter in his hands. His eyes ran over the lines again and again.

Unbearable pain spread in his chest. He had lost his happiness forever. How should he carry on living without her, without her presence?

With despair he covered his face with his hands cried bitterly until he fell asleep again from exhaustion.

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Epilogue

She lowered the newspaper and watched the children playing in the playground. A small boy waved to her shortly before continuing shoveling sand into his little bucket.

Tohru`s eyes wandered back to the article she had just read. A young, up and coming architect had just won the competition for a museum of modern art in Tokyo. A photo of a young handsome man adorned the article. Although the picture was in black and white she would never forget the man's purple eyes. She would never forget him.

For him she had given up everything. She had fought her way through the last few years, had managed to build up her own life. Her friends had helped her whenever they could although they didn't understand why they had to keep it a secret.

She didn't know if he still remembered her. She had left without saying goodbye. But she had taken something with her that night that nobody could take away from her. Her memories of that night were still so lively that it could have been yesterday. No, she would not forget him. His eyes that had looked at her so softly, his hands that had caressed her.

She would keep that memory for the rest of her life. Nothing and nobody could take this from her.

She dived out of her memories. It was getting chilly. Time to leave.

"Shinta, we have to leave! It's time to go home!"

The little boy who had waved his hand earlier looked at her with his big purple eyes and ran towards her.