Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Sweet Confessions ❯ Sweet Confessions ( Chapter 1 )

Yun Yun: Just so we ALL know. It's a relatively good guess that, no, I do not own Fruits Basket and if I did, I'd be a very happy person.

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She smiled at him. Even though she was shocked, she smiled at him. And the look she gave him. How could she take it so easily? How could she possibly match up to what I have always known and loved? One little secret, scarcely known by anyone, even Tohru…and she doesn't care…? It would seem so hard. So very difficult to not fall into the embrace of someone you love without knowing the true reason why they will never be able to. It's sad, and yet… Yet sometimes once and awhile, it just happens. The sight of the curse, its true being, its whole form, will not scare her away. That look. She gave him that same little smirk, that coy wink that was always given to him every time he won a game of Rich Man Poor Man. I wonder if that girl really did suspect something of him. Maybe that's the real reason as to why she did pick on him so much…

My dearest Kyo.

I can't believe how you laughed, how you looked so scared as she wrapped her arms around your large, bladed arm, quivering in the setting sunlight. As the day's rain continued to fall.

I wonder how you felt. I wonder if you had noticed me watching you from the forest brush. I had followed her. Just as she had followed you. Those clumsy arms, those sharp claws, glistening as water droplets slid down, like the tears that streaked your face. So your bracelet had been stolen, so she saw you as it happened. So did I. And yet I can tell that you cared more about how she would react. How she felt. More then you would ever concern about me. You pulled your body away, your frightened expression hissed with warning: Leave now. But, to my surprise, to your surprise, she only grasped you tighter.

Her sorrow ridden face broke a small smile as she held you closer. And I could hear her. She only said to you in the most pleading, sincere way.

"Please, don't move. I just want some orange-top time…"

How like her. To use that tone of voice, that nonchalant, care-free voice that I was always greeted with whenever I came to visit you at the high school. And what a sweet nickname, "orange-top". It fit him so well.

But there's one thing I can tell. Between your fights, your bickering, that wonderful sense of victory as you thrust down the winning hand of cards…I can tell. It's all so clear. It's so clear now, Kyo, Uo.

You loved each other all along. And I can never change that.

Now my eyes strain against the still falling rain, threatening to sting my eyes if I dared open them too wide. My lungs began to burn as I breathed my way through the forest, my shoes risking being caught in the fresh mud as I ran. Now the tears fall from my eyes. I had been blind. All my dreams of being the one, that girl he would smile at and hold close, my vision of our wedding, the proud yell as I sang "I am Mrs. Kyo Sohma!" vanished. Just like that. And now I realize. She will take my place. In every dream, in every thought that I had of me and him. I would have to replace myself with her. Arisa Uotani. I congratulate you. You have done what I could not.

My vision is growing blurry; but I know I've made it. The house. The main house. Had I really run all the way here? I used my last drop of strength and burst through the door, my foot catching the rug in my anguish. I fall, tumbling over onto my side, my head slamming the hardwood floor. No. There's no reason to rise again, to feel the pull of my tightening muscles again. My head throbbed. I had made it home. That's all that mattered. I could feel the yarn shrink around my feet as my mud coated socks began to dry. My once beautiful melon colored dress was stained an ugly olive from the rain, and my chocolate hair had faded to a bitter brown, almost black. Tears refused to cease as they rolled down my cheeks. I brought my hands up to my face. I couldn't stand it. My sorrow came out all at once as I cried myself to sleep.

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A light shone through my eyelids, painfully arousing me from my deep slumber. My eyes tried to open, to glimpse this light that pained me so, but they refused to even creep open the slightest peep. I tried to move my legs. The dried mud kept me from any movement. I was just too weak and too tired to try again. My breath is still heavy and in my distressing and restless sleep I had pulled my knees up to my chest to conceal the chill that I felt. And yet, through all the pain I was and still am feeling, I know someone is here with me. There is. A figure looming over me. I must look so pitiful, to whomever it was above me. I reached out to the figure that I was so blindly trying to find. My hand, shaking so terribly, but I can feel the concerned grimace that's locked onto me. Sudden warmth gripped my outstretched hand. I can hear the sharp breath as whomever is above me gasped in horror.

"Oh my god, Kagura! You're freezing!"

It certainly surprised me. Why was he here out of all people? If I had the will, I would smile and say "don't worry about me, its all right I'm fine", but my voice by now is near gone. But I can't just lay on this dank and rain soaked floor. Taking in a deep breath and putting my will behind me, I slowly began to part my eyelids to gaze up at him.

"Mo…Momiji…" was all I could muster to say to him.

Hopefully he could hear the pleading in my voice, the small cry of help that I so wanted someone to heed. My vision steadily cleared, the watercolor blur ahead taking shape into the blonde haired rabbit of my family. We finally locked eyes, staring at each other. What else can I do? I want so badly to ask him why he was crying. Why is he so upset? It's too unlike him, it's not right. He shouldn't be crying over me. My hands began to respond more now and I gradually pull my way towards him, never taking my eyes off his. He quickly outstretched his arms, taking hold of my own and pulling me forward. I felt his legs shift under me as I pushed myself onto my back. Strength is returning, I can look at him now. But he rejected my gaze, pulling my head back to lie against his chest instead.

"Kagura, what happened?" his sweet voice, stained with worry echoed off the hollow walls of the house.

Now I had to answer. I can't hide my grief. I can't keep this bottle, so tightly plugged, hidden inside me any longer. And even though I don't want to show him, my eyes showed him for me. The tears just won't stop. And even though I can't see his face, I can tell that he was doing the same. A warm air flowed through my hair momentarily as Momiji bowed his head atop mine. Silence. No, it's too quiet. I had to tell him now.

"Momiji…I…K…Kyo's…" I couldn't stop sobbing long enough to say it all. I'm so pathetic. But his eyes smiled down upon me, I can feel it, he understood. Thank god.

"It's okay. I understand. Kyo is in love with someone else, isn't he? Kagura, you know that it was bound to happen." It made me wince. Why did the truth have to hurt so much? "And it's not to say that I doubted you two ever. I would've loved to have been there on your wedding day. It would've been so great to see you happy and smiling on such a beautiful occasion, Kagura. And I know you would have the best wedding gown the world has ever seen. But, unfortunately, tragically, it just…didn't fall into place that way. You must've seen it too, right? How Kyo and Arisa were getting along so well. But, please Kagura, please, be happy for him. Smile for them like you would smile for him. You always said you wanted to see Kyo happy, and he's so happy now. So, why don't you smile?"

The words seemed to twist my heart. The sadness that threatened to override him as he said this, made me feel so selfish. So hurt. How was I to know that I was hurting him sitting here, crying, making a scene as it felt like my soul had been ripped out…over Kyo? But, more importantly, it confuses me.

I took a breath. "Why…?"

Now I can feel him smile. That cute, radiant grin of his. And somehow, right now, the sadness that plagued me so just moments before are already beginning to fade. A faint wisp of air blew by my ear. A quaint beat that reminded me of the brightest summer, the sweetest flower, lightening my sorrow ever the slightest bit more. A giggle.

"Kyo wasn't man enough to handle you!"

It made me wonder for a moment, yet thinking about it, I can see the humor in his reasoning. I nodded for him to continue. Even if it was slightly humorous, it didn't clarify my still clouded mind of confusion. And by the look of it, I think he could tell.

"He couldn't see how much you did love him! Every punch you gave him, every migraine you left him meant you loved him that much more! And it's so sweet! But, he just wasn't following you, mean ol' Kyo. You were always so cheerful whenever you visited him, I could tell, even when you were beating up on him, I knew that you were laughing and smiling inside! For you to find out about him though…Kagura it's not fair! You look so sad! You're so miserable and I just want to make it better! I want to be able to see you smile, so I can smile along with you!"

He was pleading. I can't believe Momiji actually noticed all those things about me. It was true how I reacted to Kyo, it was so true how much I loved him all the more every time I saw him. And Momiji noticed…he noticed all of that…

A tear rolls down my cheek as I begin to understand. And with one swift move, his hand brushed it away, a sincere smile on his face as I look up at him. His arms, having been at my side this whole time, moved to slide around my neck, holding me closer to him.

"Momiji…I…" I tried to tell him, but to my relief he began to speak softly into my ear.

"Kyo just wasn't man enough and I know I may just seem like a kid…But I'll be man enough. I know that one more punch means one more act of love and I can take it. I wan to take it. I want to know how much emotion is behind your beautiful heart. I want to show you that I'm more then what you think. And I promise I will be man enough. I want to love you Kagura. Like a man."

A small smile came across my lips, matching his own sweet grin above. The tears had stopped. I can't believe I hadn't noticed it earlier. And it did. Now my complete surprise, yet to my greatest comfort, I am happy. And even if he doesn't hear me, even if my voice is so weak it can't be heard, I want him to know. I am happy for Kyo. I am glad that he and Arisa will get to share the dream that I had dreamt of.

But most of all…I'm happy.

"I love you, Kagura."

And now, Momiji, you will always know it.

"I love you too."