Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Timid Eyes ❯ Ritsu ( Chapter 2 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Timid Eyes
"Ritsu"
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Disclaimer: I own nothing at all..... relating to FB, situations....or even talent... Daaaa

A/N: Ok ok ok....I know this has nothing to do with any of the other fics I've been writing...it just seemed somehow wrong to leave Ritsu out of the mix! He deserves a little bit of blush, ne? Once again, not sure if there will be a point to this....just going where my Ritsu muse leads me! And I have absolutely no clue why I'm writing a threesome fic through the eyes of a man... ~sighs sadly~ No clue. Please enjoy!

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I put the phone down with a shaking hand. Okaasan looks at me questioningly, but I can't answer her. Aya-niisan called me! He wanted to see my designs! My breathing began to grow erratic and my pulse throbbed in my heart.

Still avoiding my mother's worried look, I rush to my small room. I nearly float into my room. I have never been so excited! Aya-niisan has never asked to see my designs before.

Aya-niisan is the only relative that I feel comfortable with. He has never treated me as the others have. Never made my shyness and unworthiness an issue. He was always the same with me as he was with everyone else. I wish I was more like him. Shigure-niisan and Hatori-niisan told me that that is impossible, but I don't want to believe that. I want to be like Aya-niisan.

I walk to my mirror, slowly turning around, my eyes always on the reflection. I fingered my long hair thoughtfully. Aya-niisan was the reason I grew my hair this long. I had wanted to dye my hair silver... but okaasan wouldn't let me. I felt my smile turn to a grimace

She had told me that she loved me the way that I was. That she loved me no matter what. My eyes began to burn as I gazed at my reflection. If she loved me no matter what, then why was she always apologizing to others for me? Why was she ashamed of me? I bit my lip at the memory of my mother's form bowing low in front of Akito-san. Her back had been to me. But I had seen everything.

My mother was ashamed of me.

That's when Ayame-niisan became my idol. His hair was long, and he behaved like he wanted to - not caring what other people thought of him. And yet, there was something else that attracted me to his personality, that made me want to be more like him.

He never apologized.

Never once. For who he was, for who he is. That's why I respected him so much. Yuki didn't see that. Yuki was annoyed by his brother. He didn't realize that when I told him that he looked like Ayame, I was actually paying him an enormous compliment. He may not have seen it like that, but he didn't look - no, didn't want to see - that coming from me, that meant that I looked up to him as well. He's so blinded to his brother.

I smoothed my stray hairs back behind my ear. I was wearing my favorite kimono. I wanted to be a designer. I wanted to eventually work for Ayame-niisan in his store. Just to be near him would surely change me. Make me stop apologizing. I know I apologize too much. I get it from my mother. That's where I get my looks, and my personality. I watched her apologize for me for so long, that it became natural to apologize to everyone for how I was.

I know that it's weird for a man to dress in the furisode of a young woman, but it went far beyond changing my clothes. It wasn't that I didn't want to dress like a man, but it was that I didn't feel like I was worthy it. Not that I'm saying that women aren't worthy... I sniffled. There I go again. How do I get myself to stop apologizing. Even when it's just a thought. I feel so guilty.

I looked closer in the mirror. I could see the clock. Oh no! It was close to when I had to be there! I can't be late! I just can't!

I quickly untie my obi and adjust the nagajyuban and datejime, before closing the kimono again. I gather the ends of the obi in my hands and pull the sash taut and tie it once more. I twist it around on me so that the tie is in the back. Smoothing the folds in my kimono, I give myself one more lookover.

I know that Aya-niisan will probably resent my dressing this way, but it's the only way I feel comfortable with my weak nature. I would apologize when I see him, I decided.

I look at my room once more before sliding my door shut. My face pales as I realize that I am lacking my designs. Oh no! Now I really will be late. And after Aya-niisan requested that I not be! I rush back into my room and retrieve the folder with my designs. I walk quickly to my door and slide the door shut. I pause briefly to catch my breath and run over in my mind if I left anything.

Sighing in relief, I hurry out the door, avoiding my mother's eyes. If she knew where I was going, she would be happy. I had no worry with that. But I wanted to savor something by myself for a while. That Aya-niisan had actually invited me over to his store!

I was never a very fast child. I was usually slower than the other children. I wasn't even invited to play with the other Soma children. I guess that was just one more thing that I could add to my complexes. So, when Aya-niisan called me, I felt like I could fly to his store.

I walk quickly, not noticing the beautiful sky or clouds. I am focused only on things that I will say to Aya-niisan. I'm not a quick thinker - basically, I don't think well on my feet. I need to have what I say planned out far ahead of time.

That way, I don't fumble.

My toe bumped up against a step. I glanced up to discover that I was in front of Aya-niisan's shop. I smiled at the sign. "AYAME" The name of the owner fit the store perfectly.

I take a deep breath and let it out, before I knock.

Aya-niisan opens the door. His expression is unreadable. He doesn't look unhappy to see me. He just doesn't look happy either. Shakily, I remind myself that he invited me. He must just be upset that I'm so late. His face looked a little red. I begin to bow low to apologize for my lack of punctuality.

I can see out the top of my open eyes that Aya-niisa is grinning at me. He raises his hand in front of my face. I straighten my body in response.

Yokatta! I silently sigh in relief. That is when I notice that he is looking at my folder in my hands. He waves me inside the shop. I enter, hesitantly at first, as he leads me through the door to the back office. I follow him to his desk, and watch as he sits down and takes my folder from my outstretched hands. I bite my lip anxiously as he ruffles through the pages of designs.

He moves through the stack quickly, looking at each design for few seconds before moving to the next one. I'm confused. He had said that he wanted to look at my designs, but he doesn't really take the time. A new worry crosses my mind.

He doesn't like them! I can feel my eyebrows knit over my tear-filled eyes, my heart beating impossibly fast. I nearly fall over when he says those magical words that make my heart swell with joy.

"Ri-chan, these are very good!"

I can't contain the ecstatic smile covering my face like a veil. My eyes glaze over and I begin to zone out, then I hear it.

"Ano...Ayame-san?"

I can't control my surprise. A woman's voice? I didn't know that Aya-niisan had a customer. This was bad! But then why did he invite me here? This is how I usually reason with myself. On good and bad days, I fall asleep to the tape recorder inside of my mind that has captured every single thing that I've said and how people reacted to it. It's replaying itself now.

What surprises me even more is when Aya-niisan jumps to his feet and run over to the changing room. I gape as I imagine him entering. Thankfully, he stops at the wall.

"Hai Tooru-kun?"

Tooru-san is here? My eyes grow wider with the next exchange.

"I can't find the ties..."

"Ne, Tooru-kun? There are no ties for this dress."

Tooru-san must be trying on one of Aya-niisan's outfits. I smile.

"Would you like a hand?" Aya-niisan continues to my surprise. Of course he can't see how my jaw has dropped.

"H-hai.. arigatou" Tooru-san's voice.

All sorts of visions swirl in my mind. I wonder what the dress looks like? I hope I can see it too! I love Aya-niisan's designs so much!

Aya-niisan walks back to wear I am standing, still. I don't feel as though I am able to move. There is something in his eyes that worries me a little bit. It is a look that I have never seen on him. A look that I have never seen on anyone. Gah! I notice I'm staring at him, so I drop my face to my designs. Right now, my designs have never become so important to me.

"Ne, Ri-chan?"

His voice stirs me. I reluctantly lift my face to meet his gaze.

"Give me your hand for a moment." I can't help but blush. His voice sounds strained, but as I worship him, I comply.

He gently takes my right hand with both of his. I can't tear my face away from his gaze, as I feel him caressing my palm with his gentle fingers. I feel something cool at first, and then it fades into heat. As he lets go of my hand, I raise my hand to my face and cautiously sniff at the strange sensation.

There was no scent as far as I could tell. All I was aware of, besides Aya-niisan watching me, was that my hand began to itch in the same place that he had massaged.

"Nan desu ka, Aya-niisan?" I'm confused again. What did he put in my hand? Any answer that he might have replied with was cut short by Tooru's voice.

"Ayame-san? Are you coming?"

I watched Aya-niisan turn to gaze at the curtain. He slowly moves his face back to me. His smile is tight, and seems forced. Kami! Did I do something wrong again?

"Just a moment, Tooru-kun!"

He leans near to my face, and whispers to me.

"Didn't you have to go to the bathroom?"

His gaze is locked on my eyes, and I can't turn away. I'm getting uncomfortable under the intensity of his stare. He seems to look into my soul. I have dressed in kimono for a long time, I know that you need to go bathroom before you begin to cover yourself in the layers that the fashion requires. But, as he watched me closely, staring at me with those golden eyes, my bladder suddenly feel swollen. I nod slightly. He grins.

I can feel his gaze on me as I excuse myself to go find the bathroom. I feel very lucky, as I slid open the door to the bathroom. If I was really a woman, this wouldn't be easy. All I have to do is to open the robes. I don't have to sit down.

Standing in front of the low toilet, I quickly part the robes and pull myself out. I look at it for a moment before I stare at the corner of the ceiling. I can't help but blush as I find myself thinking of erotic things.

I will admit that there are times when my fingers linger on the proof of my gender. And I like those times. I'm so shy that, even though I'm one of the older jyuunishi, I lack experience of my younger relatives. I've avoided talking to girls, because I have such a hard time forming words when I'm nervous. When I feel like my words are being judged. Like I'm being judged by what I say. Yes, I've pleasured myself before. I touch myself, because I'm too scared to let anyone else touch me in that way.

It's not that I would fee humilated. But that I don't want to disappoint anyone by my clumsiness. And I'm clumsy. But there are times... when I really wish... that I really wish I could find someone who will accept me for my faults, and encourage me.

I look down at my cock, as I feel myself tense up. It takes me a moment to notice that I'm slowly rubbing the soft skin.

I'm not trying to pleasure myself now, it's just that I itch so badly. It burns. I'm having a hard time seeing straight, as I begin to rub myself even more. Faster and harder. I want to stop, I keep telling myself to stop, but I can't. There is an itch there that is only satisfied by the friction that the rubbing as produced. The harder and faster that I rub, the less I itch. I close my eyes, trying to concetrate enough to quicken my hand movements.

I open my eyes when I hear three distinct drips. I stare in front of me, and pull my eyebrows together in a frown. I felt a new sensation in my length and I look down. My mouth opens in surprise as I realize that I've come. It's funny. But I've never come before. I have always stopped myself before I got to that point.

It feels good.

I sigh contentedly, before letting my robes cover my erection. Aya-niisan is probably wondering what happened to me. I couldn't possibly tell him the truth. The truth was embarrassing.

I imagined myself walking up to Aya-niisan. He asks me where I have been. I boldly tell him that I was jerking off. Before his look of shock becomes permanent, I tell him that I've come too. I giggle to myself, the look on his face. That would be something that he would never expect!

But, still, it's one thing to imagine it, and another thing totally to actually do it. It's still an amusing thought. I grin as I slide the door again and walk out.

The room is empty. I can hear sounds coming from the changing room, so I walk over. I move gently since my erection is still sore.

I knock lightly, but I get no answer. I can hear the sounds more clearly. Aya-niisan and Tooru-san were both moaning. I found the sound very erotic, as my erection gave proof. I stand there for what seems like a few moments, trying to decide what to do.

I should announce myself, but I can't find my voice. So, instead, I pull one side of the curtain, providing a crack. I peak through and gasp when I see what is going on.

Tooru-san's tangled yellow dress hung over her legs, as she had locked her ankles around Aya-niisan's waist. I watched as he raised himself on his toes, pushing into her harder. Tooru-san's face was tilted toward the ceiling, and I could see a distinct blush over her cheeks. She cried out as Aya-niisan pushed harder and multiple times.

I felt a blush stain my cheeks. I shouldn't watch this. But I find that I can't help it. I'm fascinated. My own erection grew painful at the erotic sight. I reached my hand in through the robes of my kimono to embrace myself. I began to rub myself in my fist, matching my rhythm to theirs.

I watched with heavy eyes as Aya-niisan moved one of his hands, causing Tooru-san to scream in pleasure. I wonder if she came. I wonder what he did.

Suddenly Tooru-san's eyes seemed to move to where my eye was. She focused her gaze on the place in the curtain that I was behind. Did she see me? Kami, I hope not! I would never be able to live with myself. And Aya-niisan would be mad if he knew that I was watching him.

Tooru-san murmured something against Aya-niisan's ear, never taking her eye off of the curtain. I continue to watch against my better judgement. If they have noticed me, I should definitely move away. And yet, I am unable to move. Aya-niisan's head moves from side to side, and I can only imagine the things that he is doing to make her moan that way.

I watch as Aya-niisan nods slightly and walks away from the wall, carrying Tooru still wrapped around him. He sits her down on one of the stools in the changing room. Her legs tighten their hold as she locks her ankles. Aya-niisan has a contented smile. His eyes are closed, and his back is arched.

I notice that Tooru-san has arched her back over the stool, her waist supported by Aya-niisan's midsection. This action has caused Tooru-san's breast to fall slightly towards her collarbone. I feel myself blush even harder. But I still can't turn away from the sight. My own hands move faster over my arousal.

Tooru held out her arms as she called out. She waved one of her hand.

"Richan-san, come here..." WHAT? So they do see me. I know that I should be embarrassed and walk home. But I've come too far to go back home. Besides, even if I did go back home, it wouldn't change the fact that they had seen me watching them. I gulp. And if I do go home, how would I ever talk to Aya-niisan again? Or look at Tooru-san?

Before I can even stop myself, I pull my hand away from my erection and pull the curtain back so that I can enter. I'm very timid, and stop in the doorway. Seeing their pose through a crack in the curtain is one thing. Seeing Aya-niisan and Tooru-san nude unnerves me. I shiver involuntarily as I continue to stare at the soft mounds of flesh on Tooru-san's chest.

"Ri-chan...when a beautiful woman beckons to you... You should never turn her down" Aya-niisan's eyes opened to thin slits as he looked at me.

Without thinking, I lowered my hand to my erection and itched at it through the layers of kimono.

"De-demo...Aya-niisan...?" I am now fearful of what may happen. I could feel myself becoming harder and more filled with lust for those pebbled nipples on display before me.

"Ri-chan... I'm trying to help you out here. You want to be like me, ne?"

I nodded slowly, the realization of what was happening just now sinking into my consciousness. Aya-niisan continued, interrupting my thoughts.

"Then come over to Tooru-kun. I think this may soothe your tension and give you a heightened sense of self-worth."

I blinked at Aya-niisan. He set me up. He set Tooru-san up. This was all a plan? I remember the fluid from earlier and feel my confusion deepening. What was that fluid? The burning sensation increased as my erection went untouched. Regardless of how I feel, my mind goes back to my desire of friction. I want it so badly that it's hurting me not to have it.

A moan from Tooru caused my eyelids to become heavy and my eyes darkened as I continued to stare at her chest. My erection twitched with each moan of pleasure that Tooru-san made. I slowly moved to where Tooru's hands were, and stopped just short of her touch.

She stretches her arms even more and pulls my hips closer to her face. I can't help but reach my hand out to graze one of her pink nubs. I nearly touch one before pulling my hand away. I can't touch her like that. She's Tooru-san... I vaguely hear Aya-niisan snort and Tooru's light giggle. I concentrate on finding reasons why I shouldn't touch. My body is swiftly overpowering my mind, as I give in and lightly touch one of her soft mounds.

Her skin is so soft. I want to taste it.

Before I realize what Tooru-san is doing, she has reached into my kimono and is touching my itching member. The itch begins to fade as another sensation begins to intensify.

I moan to myself, I don't know if the others hear it. I don't care if they do. This feels really good! I gasp as I feel wetness on the tip of my arousal. My eyes widen in surprise as Tooru-san is pushed into my member by one of Aya-niisan's thrusts. Aya-nissan is staring at me.

"Ne, Ri-chan, untie your obi." I can't object to anything that he requests of me. I slowly move my hands to my back and untie the obijime cords, then undo the obiage before beginning to work on loosening the butterfly obi, letting it slip to the floor. Tooru-san spread the kimono, only to find the expected nagajyuban beneath it. Aya-niisan growls and pushes Tooru-san into me again. She slips the kimono off of my shoulders and starts to part the nagajyuban, placing her face inside the curtain the robe provide.

I gasp in pleasure as her mouth engulfs my arousal. I shiver when her nose lightly rubs against my sac. Her toungue moved along the underside of my manhood, her teeth lightly rubbing against the sensitive skin.

I can feel, rather than see, her head moving back and forth over me, licking, nipping, teasing me with her tongue. Her hands grabbed my rear, bracing herself against the double-ended thrusting.

Suddenly Tooru-san is slammed into me with such force that I have to take a step back to keep my balance. I grab her underneath her arms, keeping my distance, as we both look at Aya-niisan.

"What's wrong?" Tooru-san asks Aya-niisan with a low, confused voice.

I watch as Aya-niisan pulls out from between Tooru-san's legs. I blink, looking at his size. He's so unashamed that he's naked.

Tooru-san unsuccessfully tightens her hold on him. Aya-niisan raises a hand to wipe his face.

Did I do something wrong? I am completely confused for the third time since I came to "AYAME". I feel my face pale, and I start to tremble in horror.

"Aya-niisan?"

He tries to focus his eyes on me. I can't read the emotion in his eyes. He looked irritated as he sighed.

"Did I do something to anger you?"

He looks at Tooru-san before staring at me.

"Anger me?"

I don't know whether to feel relief or sadness or fear as Aya-niisan begins to laugh. I look at Tooru-san, trying to guage how she felt and then match her feeling. She looks as lost as me.

"No, Ri-chan, you didn't anger me at all!" I watch as Aya-niisan wipes at his eyes.

"Then what's wrong?" Tooru-san reaches up to touch Aya-niisan's face, and he back away. Her hand remains there, dejectedly. Aya-niisan smiles suddenly.

"Nothing. But don't you see?!?"

Tooru-san and I look at each other in confusion.

"RI-CHAN DIDN'T APOLOGIZE! ATARI!!!!" Aya-niisan widens his smile, leaving the room.

Tooru-san and I both look at each other after Aya-niisan leaves. I did something wrong. I don't know what I did, because Aya-niisan smiled. For some reason, Aya-niisan is upset. And I realize something. This cannot continue.

Aya-niisan means too much to me.

"Ano, Richan-san?"

I hear her voice as I kneel down to pick up my robes and sashes to dress. I put the robes on before I walk over to where Tooru-san's clothes were tossed. I pick them up and hand them to her open hand. I look at her as she opens her mouth to speak.

"Is Ayame-san ok?"

I look away from her, to where Aya-niisan had just walked out.

I am silent as I watch the curtain, still swaying.


***To Be Continued***

Translator's notes:
Atari is another way of saying "success"

nagajyuban is the robe that is worn underneath the kimono, datejime is the sash that it tied over.

obijime is the cord that is tied around the center of the obi

obiage is the thin silk "scarf-like" sash that hangs slightly over the edge of the obi

butterfly obi is a an obi tied ornately to appear as a butterfly (it's REALLY cool looking) - I just figured that Ritsu would know how to tie one...