Fullmetal Alchemist Fan Fiction ❯ Drunked Slurs Drunken Fights Drunken Purrs Drunken Nights ❯ The Christmas Bash ( One-Shot )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Ever dealt with two drunk friends? Well, have you ever dealt with two drunk sexy bishis. This is an aka for Edward Elric and Envy. Come on they just happen to glance at each other and their fighting Well, they are both dragged to a party by two crazed fangirls, and just happen to get drunk. What happens?

Katya and Sunset were always fans of Ed and Envy. They said they loved the two passionately. Sunset constantly getting into fight with Winry Rockbell because of it. Fighting constantly and it usually was left up to Katya or Edward himself to break up the battle. No matter if it was summer, fall, winter, or spring the fighting ensued. It just so happened to be Christmas Eve and the two girls ran around out in the snow throwing snowballs and such, much like they had done every year. Sunset aiming directly for Winry the whole time. Her prey in sight, that face contorted in anger whenever she was hit squarely in the face. Oh Sunset loved it so.

"So Sunny...We still doing that party thing tonight?" Katya asked looking to her best friend as they ducked behind a large oak tree. They had stayed up all night last night to plan a Christmas Bash for the whole gang. The gang by which consisted of themselves, the Elrics, Mustang, Armstrong, plus others from Central and of course Katya's love intrest Envy. Her connection with the sins caused unrest among those at central and the Elric brothers. Envy usually was the one sent to bring Katya back since she worked for them. Distrustful of her Central kept quiet when she was around but anything that slipped was kept secret. Katya was good at not giving crucial information to Envy even if he tried seducing her to make her talk.

"Oh yes Kat this Christmas I will finally catch Ed under the mistletoe!" Sunset said smiling. She dove from behind the white oak to behind a tulip poplar which didn't help her seeing as it was a smaller tree and you could see her. As she dove back to the Oak she was pelted to the ground by a couple of snowballs.

"No fair Edward!" Katya shouted still cowering behind a tree "You're using alchemy to create that launcher!." Both girls knew perfectly well Edward cheated when it came to snowball fights. Since niether could use alchemy they'd always lose. Then the group would go get some hot cocoa, at that point Envy would come ruin the moment and drag Katya back to wherever the sins were hiding. Katya made it her mission this year to be the one to drag Envy.... to drag him to the Christmas Bash. Sunset's goal this year was to get Edward to kiss her, ever since they first met, she was attracted to him. His blonde hair, golden eyes, and attitude is what drew her. Katya always joked with her saying it was her height that attracted her to him. Sunset had wavy brown hair to her shoulders, and brown eyes. She was just about Ed's height only a little shorter. At first he was astonished to see her so short, then started to make fun of her, now she is the shortest of the group. Katya became the third shortest, taller than Edward and Sunset but shorter than Envy. Her straight hair constantly changed color, one would have thought she could shapeshift like Envy. Her hair at the moment was a deep mahogany brown with magenta tips and her fringed bangs covered her right eye.

Katya could see Sunset's and her own appearences in the ice behind them. She turned her attention back to the Elrics and Winry when she realized that there had not been ice there before.

"Sunset...there's an ice wall behind us" she spoke in a eerily quiet tone. Sunset didn't move but remained frozen where she was.

"You sure?" she asked.

"Very..." Katya replied. Both girls then turned to face the giant ice wall.

"No fair Ed...." Sunset pouted. The older Elric had created an ice fortress complete with snowball launchers all pointing at the girls.

"Those are new!" Katya exclaimed pointing at the gargoyles on the wall alongside the launchers. The pelting of the two girls then commenced and they were buried in snow. Winry sat atop the fortress laughing and pointing. Sunset sighed and felt Katya's hand on her shoulder. Ed had always teamed up with Winry during the fights and it depressed Sunset. Both girls dug their way out of the snow mound and glared at Edward and Winry. Alphonse ran up.

"Guys come on now...Ed you're going to hurt Sunset and Katya" he protested.

"Yeah you don't want to hurt us do ya?" Katya called up in a sweet voice.

"KATYA!!!!!!!" a scream wailed in the air causing said girl to roll her eyes.

"Hello Envy darling...you're early" she said nonchalantly. The sin ran up to her, glaring at the Elrics the whole way. He quickly grabbed ahold of her arm.

"Stop running out.....and stop coming here!" he demanded. Katya stared at the palm tree.

"Look....they are my friends I will hang out with them when I want" she spoke with a smile.

"You work for us not them" Envy spat out. Katya caressed his cheek.

"But they are MY FRIENDS" she screamed in his ear. Envy glared at her, that malicious look that made her smile inwardly.

"I love you snooky-bear" she said in a motherly voice. Envy reached out and struck her with the back of his hand. Katya went flying back and landed in the snow.

"HEY!" Edward yelled. He jumped down from the fort and glared at Envy.

"Let the fighting commence" Sunset said boredly. The two males started to go at each other, to tear each other limb from limb. Edward could not stand idly by while Envy abused Katya. Envy on the other hand just wanted to tear Ed apart. Katya stood up and brushed the snow out of her hair.

"Alright boys break it up!" she yelled. She charged into the fight and pulled Envy back. Sunset grabbed ahold of Ed. Katya smiled at Edward and used her hair to hide her now bruising cheek.

"We're going to leave now...so I'll see you guys later" she said and pulled a reluctant Envy off in the opposite direction.

Katya hummed a Christmas carol as her and Envy walked across a wooded area. The only sound came from her humming and the crunching snow underneath. The humming suddenly stopped and Katya looked over at him.

"Envy?" she asked. He didn't look at her, only sped up his pace.

"What?" he asked.

"Come to the Christmas Bash" Katya said. That statement caused Envy to stop and Katya to walk into him.

"What?" he asked. Katya repeated her question.

"The hell is that?" he asked her.

"It's a party....I'm throwing it with Sunset, I want you to come...oh Please, pretty please, pretty pretty please?" she started to beg him. He stared at the multi-haired girl as she folded her hands and stared at him in a childish way.

"No..." came his answer. For a split second her face contorted in anger....then she got an evil look in her eyes.

"Fine..I'll go tell them all your hideouts for the next month" she said with a smile. Knowing full and well he didn't believe her, she turned around and started walking back to central to make her point. About thirty seconds later she felt her arm grabbed and was yanked around to come face to face with an angry palm tree.

"Good so you'll come?" she asked with a smile. Envy kept quiet and dragged her towards the hideout destination. Katya took this as a quiet submission.

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Sunset stared off after the two until she could no longer see them. Edward was mumbling to himself. Then...

"Sunset let go of my arm" he ordered. Her grip loosened enough for him to break out of it.

"Why does she insist on going to that damned palm tree..." he yelled. Sunset smiled a little.

"She loves him...." was her answer, but it didnt seem to convince Ed. He turned and faced her.

"You're her friend talk her out of it!" he screamed. Sunset slapped him.

"No!" she yelled. "Look..it's better to have her there then here...she keeps an eye on them, haven't you noticed their activity has gone down?" Sunset inquired. Everyone was silent.

"You guys are still coming to the Christmas party right?" She asked. Ed again started to mumble to himself.

"Yeah Sunset wouldn't miss it for the world" Alphonse answered. Sunset's smile grew wider.

"Okay then be there at 7:00!" She turned, sent the blonde mechanic a glare, and ran off towards home to get ready for tonight. She had a special surprise for the group, including Katya.

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7:00

Sunset hummed a little tune, it sounded like a bluebird would be the one singing not a human girl. She had just finished putting the angel on her Christmas tree when the doorbell rang. Running over she opened the door to find The Elrics, Winry, and Armstrong.

"Hello guys!" she said brightly and let them in.

"What the hell is that" Edward pointed at her Christmas tree. It was a small pine set up in the corner of the room by the window. The white garland twinkled in the light.

"It's my Christmas tree" Sunset shouted proudly. She stared at the beautiful sight while her company exchanged looks of horror, amusement, awe, and confusion.

"A Christmas tree?" Alphonse asked. Sunset turned to them, placing her hands on her hips she stared at them in anger.

"YES A CHRISTMAS TREE!" she shouted. For a short girl, she was scary when angry and had a short fuse. The group backed up a little bit and stared at her in horror. As quickly as it had came the anger diffused into the air and a smile appeared on her face again. Sunset turned and walked into the room to put some snoflakes on the tree. Her humming also resumed. The group not entirely sure what to do with themselves stepped into her tiny living room and took seats on her furniture.
"Put your coats in the closet" Sunset said not looking up from her work. The group complied and resumed their seats. The Elric brothers and Winry had placed themselves onto her maroon couch while Armstron himself sat in a plush lounge chair of black cushiony goodness. They watched her warily wondering if the way they seated themselves would throw her into another tempermental frenzy. When she turned she smiled at them.

"I'm so happy you all could come" she said cheerily. She got up from the tree and shot into the kitchen. Eyes followed her. The looked at each other all wondering the same thing. What the hell was she doing in there. Sunset had a history of being a good cook, but something always went wrong in the kitched and she would curse up a storm of hellfire. None of that had happened in the last ten minutes and they all stared at the kitchen door shocked. Two minutes later they heard something shatter. It wasn't soon after the door was kicked open, almost thrown off the hinges and Sunset stepped into the dining room with a frying pan full of smoke.
"Son of a bitch!" she shouted. Opening up the dining room window, Sunset threw the frying pan out into the snow. Slamming the window shut, she walked back into the kitchen slamming the door behind her. The group made no move to get up and see if everything was okay or to go to the window and look at the pan, they all knew better than that. Instead they found something to take their minds off the event. Anything that was quiet such as staring at walls or reading a magazine thrown onto the mahoghany coffee table. No one made a sound. Then the sound of the doorbell ringing broke the silence. Sunset appeared out of nowhere and walked over to the door. Opening it up she met Roy, Riza, and Hughes.

"Good evening guys" she said happily and ushered them in. Being hospitable to the three in front of her, she took their coats and hung them up in the closet unlike what she did with the other four.

"Please make yourselves comfortable" Sunset said.

"Sunset what is that?" Hughes asked pointing to her pine in the corner. Sunset smiled wider.

"That is my Christmas tree Hughesy" she stated. Hughes smiled back at her and ventured closer to admire her handiwork. Roy and Riza seated themselves on the "Love Sofa" opposite of Armstrong. Sunset surveyed the room and a frown found it's way onto her face.

"We're not going to have enough seating" she said aloud. Everyone looked at her. Sunset only stared at the couch.

"Are you expecting anyone else?" Riza inquired. Sunset nodded.

"Katya and her guest Envy" she said again with a cheery note in her voice. All eyes in the room hardened. Sunset got the hint.

"Oh No you guys it is CHRISTMAS we WILL treat each other with some DIGNITY!" Sunset growled emphasing certain words in her statement. "There will be NO fighting in this house!" Her death glare spoke thousands of threats to everyone in the room. The door then slammed open and Katya jumped inside.

"I'm heeeeeeeeeeeeeere" She yelled throwing her hands up into the air and waving them in a dramatic motion. Envy stepped in behind her not really believing she did soemthing so weird. Katya turned and shut the door to stop the cold air from seeping in.

"It's cold out there" she said striping off her coat and hanging it up in the closet. Turning she gave Sunset a quick hug and noticed the expressions of everyone in the room.

"Oh dear I think we might have to break out the booze early" she said placing a finger on her cheek and smiling, sticking her tongue out like a child. "And the strong stuff at that!" Sunset disappeard back into the kitchen and Katya hesitantly stepped up to the couch behind the Elrics and Winry.

"Why is there a smoking frying pan outside the house?" she asked in a whisper. Everyone just stared at her.

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8:00

"Kaaaaaaaaaaareo ooooookeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Katya shouted slinging an arm around Roy's neck and pumping her fist in the air. She was swaying and drunk out of her mind, but Mustang certainly did not mind.

"Me first, Me first" Shouted Sunset running out of the kitchen and to the television set. She had given up cooking and ordered out. Food littered the table and various alcohol bottles littered the floor.....empty. Most everyone was drunk, Envy and Ed included.

"I thought you were too young to drink pipsqueak" Envy mocked falling onto the couch. Ed glared at him.

"You!!!!!!!......you......shut up...you" he said. Katya raised an eyebrow holding her liquor better than most people in the room despite her drunk behavior.

"I think he forgot your name....or has it always been you...hahahahaha you..." she broke down laughing and jumped onto Envy. "I feel sick, cuddle with me!!!!!!" Envy pushed her off of him and she went tumbling onto the floor. She lifted herself up and pointed angrily at him.

"Not cool dude.....not cool....I'm going to barf" she placed a hand over her mouth and stumbled out of the room towards the bathroom. They stared after her in silence until they heard her start to bring the liquor back up. Then it was time to turn the kareoke up loud to drown out her horror, only...the horror was Sunset and Riza's duet. They both sang off-key horribly. Never should they be drunk together, a mental note made by everyone.

"Taaaaaaaaaake another little piece of my heart now BAAAAAAAAAABAAAAAAAAAAY" they screamed at the top of their lungs. Everyone placed their hands over their ears.

"Oh my god!!!!!!!!" Ed shouted. He stepped backwards and triped over a passed out Hughes in the comfy chair. Unfortunately he landed on Envy who was jolted out of his drunken coma.

"What the hell!!!!!!!! YOU!" Envy shouted, shoving Edward off of him. Edward glared back at him.

"YOU!!!!!!!!!" he shouted. Sunset and Riza's song ended and everyone's attention focused on them. That was until Katya stumbled back out.

"You ASSHOLESSES" she shouted pointing at the group. "I'm in there vomiting my guts out and all you do is turn the music up, I could be dead from puking this much, no one even held my hair" Katya broke down crying and fell into a heap onto the floor. Alcohol always screwed her emotions up so horribly, one never knew how she would react with things. Envy got up and stumbled over to her almost tripping over Armstrong who was curled up on the floor dreaming. He bent down and wrapped her up in his arms. The others stared at them in shock, Envy had never shown any inclination of caring for Katya at any sober moment. Katya only shoved him away making him fall backwards.

"The hell was that for!" he shouted growing red from anger. Katya glared at him.

"I couldn't breath!" she yelled. Envy stared in mock horror. Then they both burst out laughing like maniacs.

"Are they okay?" Winry asked pointing. Sunset stared at her, but it quickly changed into a glare.

"You Bitch!" she yelled and tackled Winry to the ground. It startled everyone and took them ten seconds to react, all the while Sunset was pulling on Winry's blonde hair.

"Hey Hey!" Ed yelled pulling Sunset off of the mechanic. "Easy now Sunset" Sunset looked at him and glared.

"You like her better than me!!!!!!" she shouted then broke down crying in his arms. His face turned to shock and it looked like he didnt know how to process the information just given to him. Now it was everyone's turn to stare at the pair of them. Ed sat there and petted her head staring off out the window. Katya tackled Envy in a hug and started to kiss him. Riza helped Winry to her feet and they collapsed onto the couch and Roy just stared at the power outlet like it was the most interesting thing he'd ever seen. After a bit Sunset finally calmed down.

"I'm fine" she said pushing Ed away. He let go of her and she crawled over to the wall and leaned against it.

"Katya......Katya....Katya" Sunset repeated pulling on the girls leg to get her attention. Katya focused on Sunset and forgot about making out with Envy. They stared at each other for a while both thinking what the other thought. Maybe the party had been a bad idea. Maybe everyone should just leave.

"Leave...." Sunset said after three minutes. Everyone stared at her. "LEAVE!" They scrambled about all at once. Alphonse being the only sober one helped everyone get the right coat on and began ushering them out the door. Katya grabbed Envy and Sunset likewise to Ed.

"Oh no you don't Mister!" Katya said pulling Envy over to the couch. Sunset led the older Elric over and shoved him onto the couch beside Envy. They both stood in front of them, hands on their hips. The boys just stared back unsure of what they had done wrong. They stood like that for a while, tension in the room growing. Katya was the first to crack. She threw her hands up in the air and sighed loudly.

"I can't believe you two would act like that in front of company!" she said in a huff. A look of confusion crossed the males faces. Sunset glared at them.

"Yeah!" she added the short little phrase, but there was a lot of power behind it. Both boys looked at each other. Ed's eyes lit up in anger as if remembering something.

"You.....YOU!" he shouted jumping up and pointing at Envy. "You shouldn't hit Katya!" he yelled, then leapt forward to punch Envy. Sunset thought caught him by the arm and pulled him back.

"NO FIGHTING IN MY HOUSE!" she screamed. Katya swore up and down that the house shook at that moment. The boys stared in horror. Envy pointed at Ed.

"He started it"

It was Katya's turn to leap forward. She landed on Envy and wrapped her arms around him in a bear hug. Sunset followed suit with Edward. Only she placed both hands onto the side of his face and planted a kiss on him. This had turned out to be a big, drunken mess. A drunken Christmas that no one would remember in the morning.

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Katya woke up with a raving headache....stupid hangovers. She glanced over to her right to find herself beside Envy. Smiling she brushed some hair out of his face. He groaned and buried his head into the pillow.

"Don't touch me......" he groaned. "You got me drunk you bitch" He'd eventually get over it Katya deemed. She slipped out of bed and almost went downstairs to make coffee. That was until she realized she was in Envy's clothes. Curious now she crept back over to the bed and lifted the covers. Dropping them she walked away whistling leaving Envy complain about the noise and the draft he now felt thanks to her.

Katya bounced into the Sin's kitchen and met everyone's faces. They stared at her in curiousity.

"Katya....why was Envy naked when you guys came home?" Wrath asked. Katya turned to them and smiled as she let the coffee brew.

"He's a free spirit what can I say?" she said with a huge smile folding her arms across her chest. "I don't really remember last night"

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Sunset woke up with a jolt. She shot out of bed with a smile on her face. Never one to have a hangover she jauntily walked into the kitchen where Edward Elric was making coffee.

"Good Morning!" she said with a chipper attitude. It was replied with a long groan. This only made her smile wider. She walked up to him and patted him on the back.

"I know I know it's okay" she said softly. Ed groaned again and looked up at her.

"Sunset......did we kiss last night...I remember kissing someone....but nothing else" he said. Sunset blinked several times.

"I honestly don't remember Edward" she said and left his side to sit on a chair. She placed her hand on her head and tried to think back. "It's all fuzzy for me"

Ed shifted and rested his head on the counter.

"Me Too"