Fullmetal Alchemist Fan Fiction ❯ Edward Berserk ❯ Edward Berserk ( One-Shot )

A.N. 1: Man, I'm so damn tired of writing these $@#% author's notes. Wouldn't you be?

Title: Edward Berserk

Rating: PG-13 (for heavy cussing and mild violence)

Summary: Edward finally loses his mind after being called a bean-sprout midget and other names referring to his height.

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Edward waited outside a bar, pouting. He was older then Alphonse, yet because of that “god-damned basterd armor,” as Ed had referred to it as, Al looked about thirty. “Was it me who chose to transmute my soul into this armor? Besides, I don't think they'll let you in even when you ARE of age,” Al had said.

“WHAT did you SAY?!?!” Ed had yelled, but Al had already run into the bar, knowing that Ed would react like he did. Now Ed sat outside the bar, waiting. What the hell was a suit if armor doing in a bar, anyway?

Suddenly a knife handle poked the side of Ed's head rather hard, and an obnoxious voice said, “Hey, bean-sprout midget, gemme all your mon-!” The man was cut off by Ed's auto mail fist clobbering him in the face as hard as humanly possible.

“WHAT DID YOU CALL ME, YOU $@#% BASTERD!? A MIDGET!? A BEAN SPROUT!? IS THAT A FANCY WAY OF SAYING YOU WANT ME TO SLAUGHTER YOU!?!?!? HUH!?!?!?” Ed shouted in rage while pummeling the crap out of the thug. He was definitely pissed. He then turned to a terrified crowd of passerby and screamed, “YA' THINK I'M SHORT!? I BET ALL OF YOU BITCHES AND BASTERDS DO THINK THAT, DON'T YOU!?!?” He then ran at the crowd, kicking the crap out of everyone in the crowd. “YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT!!! I'M A $@#% PISS-OFF!!!!!”

“Thanks for the beer, guys! Thanks for the weed!” Al called as he left the bar. He stopped in his tracks, seeing Ed pounding the crap out of everyone, cussing the whole time about his height.

Al put his hands on his head, sighing, “Sonofabitch.” He then walked over to Ed and clobbered him in the face.

“Hey! You can't punch your older brother!!” Ed said, sounding scandalized.

“I can if you're beating up people on impulse!”

“The guy in the armor is the younger one?” a civilian asked, in awe. “Gees. The blonde is so short; one would think it's the other way around!”

Use YOUR imagination here.