Fullmetal Alchemist Fan Fiction ❯ Future Memories ❯ Love ( Chapter 8 )

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Future Memories

 

Chapter Eight

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Love

 

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Major Roy Mustang sighed and pulled what was in his arms closer to him.

 

Another body.

 

Warm…

 

Slowly his consciousness floated to the surface of his mind and he realized he was not at home in his bed, nor had he brought home a date the night before…

 

Roy's eyelids cracked open to reveal a shock of messy blond hair.

 

Blond…?

 

It was then that the memories crashed into his mind. The Elric woman, the array, his double, the little boys, the fifteen year old State Alchemist, the fight, the fact that his older self was putting his position at risk by screwing around with his underage subordinate… who just happened to be the older version of the child in his arms…

 

Roy sighed and held the boy even closer. It was strange to think that this child would become his lover…

 

He smiled softly down at the smooth, angelic face of the sleeping boy. Of course he'd thought the teenager was attractive, but he'd never thought he'd stand a chance. His smile slipped when he thought again of the age difference. Even when the Elric boy was fifteen that would still be a fourteen year difference…

 

How did they make it work?

 

Just what kind of a relationship did they have anyway?

 

Despite his looks and his brain, both the child and the teen were both brats. How did his older double deal with the teenager?

 

Roy gently brushed his fingers against the child's face.

 

Eight years.

 

In eight years he would have a relationship with this boy…

 

He supposed he could wait that long… He'd have to, of course. Roy wasn't into little children like that…

 

Suddenly he remembered the Elric woman's rage the night before when she had learned about what was going on between the Colonel and the teenager. What if she woke up and found him sleeping with the little seven year old? Would she freak out on him too? It wasn't as if he had done anything wrong, but when it came to mothers protecting their young…

 

Well… women were just scary sometimes…

 

As nice as this snuggling was, it was time to end it for now.

 

“Hey kid…” Roy said and shook the boy in his arms.

 

Nothing.

 

The Major sighed and shook the boy again. This time the blond child moaned and lifted his head to look at his living pillow. A long string of saliva ran from the boy's mouth to Roy's uniform and the dark haired man's mouth turned down into a disgusted frown.

 

The kid had drooled on him…

 

Gross.

 

The blond boy smacked his lips together and wiped his arm along his mouth. Roy grimaced at the wet slobber that was now running along the skin of Edward's arm. He hoped that the kid moved past this unattractive habit as he got older…

 

“It's time to get up,” Roy said when the boy looked vaguely down at him.

 

“Huh?”

 

“It's wake up time,” he repeated.

 

The boy blinked. “Breakfast?”

 

Roy raised an eyebrow in amusement. He'd said nothing about food…

 

“Yeah, sure kid, whatever you want.” The Major said. He really didn't want the boy's mother to come in to find them alone on the bed together.

 

The blond boy looked around the room. “Where's Al?”

 

“I don't know. Probably in the piss… er… ah… probably going potty or something…” Roy amended and cringed. That wasn't the kind of language one used around little kids... Besides, the Major remembered what kind a vindictive little shit the kid could be, and he didn't want to give his mother anymore reason to be upset.

 

“Hmmm, maybe…” The boy said, then looked down. Roy heard the clinking of metal then the blond held up his silver pocket watch, or at least, he held it up as far as the chain would allow since it was still attached to Roy's uniform. “Coooool.” The kid breathed.

 

“You know what that is?” The dark haired man asked with a grin.

 

“It's a watch. Duh.” Edward answered snidely.

 

Roy rolled his eyes at the kid's impertinence. “Yes, it's a watch, but do you know what it does?”

 

The boy stared at him with a look that said, `Are you a moron, or are you just pretending to be one?'

 

“Besides tell time,” Roy said defensively. When the kid shook his head, the Major said, “It amplifies alchemic reactions. This is the symbol for a State Alchemist. When you become one, you'll get one too.”

 

Edward looked at the watch, then shrugged, “I don't want to be a State Alchemist.”

 

Roy blinked. “You don't?” If the kid didn't want to be a State Alchemist, then how did he become one at age twelve. It usually took many years of studying to be able to pass the written test. He would have had to start studying some time soon to reach that level of knowledge… wouldn't he?

 

“Nope,” the kid responded.

 

“Well then… what do you want to do when you grow up?” Roy asked.

 

The boy glared at the dark haired man and said, “Are you calling me short…?”

 

The Major blinked. Short? Where did the kid pick up on stuff like that? He hadn't said anything about the boy's height…

 

“No, I wasn't.”

 

Edward looked at him grumpily, then said, “I'm going to write books when I get older.”

 

“Books?”

 

The boy nodded.

 

“So you want to be like your dad?”

 

The blond raised his fist in livid anger. “No way! I'm going to be better than that bastard!”

 

Roy stared at the boy in surprise, then a grin slowly crept across his face as he thought of a way to keep the boy in check. “You swore.”

 

Edward blinked, then looked worriedly toward the door.

 

“I should probably tell your mom…”

 

The kid looked at him with a scared look on his face. “No, don't tell her, please. She'll make me chew up soap…”

 

A shriek and a squeal of laughter sounded downstairs and it was then that Roy noticed the smell of bacon frying.

 

Roy's grin widened. “Well. I'll think about not telling her… until then I suppose I'll keep it in my pocket to make sure you behave yourself…”

 

The boy stared at him angrily. “You're a bastard too!” Edward whispered savagely, then rolled off the bed stomped out of the room.

 

He stared at the doorway for a moment, wondering if his older double's relationship with the teen was this amusing, then stood up and left the room.

 

;-;-;-;-;-;-;

 

Colonel Mustang sat on the floor with his back against the wall, legs stretched out and listened to the noise coming from the kitchen.

 

What a mess.

 

This whole situation was a total mess.

 

He lifted a hand to his face where the Elric woman had hit him. It didn't hurt anymore, but sometimes he swore he felt a sting on his cheek; a lingering memory of the pain to fit the thoughts that kept running through his head.

 

The look in the woman's eyes had been of a primal animal protecting her young.

 

Her child.

 

And wasn't that just what Edward was?

 

He was still underage, so yes, he was still a child.

 

She had every right.

 

Every right.

 

`I love him mom!' The words Ed had said rung like cold chimes through his head.

 

Love.

 

Trisha Elric had been stunned by those words.

 

She wasn't the only one.

 

Love…

 

“Damn you Ed…” Roy whispered.

 

They had never spoken of love.

 

He had never…

 

Ed had never…

 

What had started out as an innocent game had quickly become infatuation…

 

And infatuation had quickly become need.

 

Physical need…

 

For them both.

 

He'd never meant for it to go this way; never meant for it to be anything other than a sport.

 

Just fun.

 

Just…

 

He should have known better. He should have realized that Ed wasn't playing the same game as him.

 

And what did he think?

 

What did he feel?

 

Roy had thought he knew…

 

He did know.

 

Until last night.

 

But now everything was just… confusion…

 

Love.

 

So Ed loved him.

 

Ed…

 

It seemed almost ludicrous, and yet he felt glad.

 

Glad and excited.

 

Eager.

 

But still confused.

 

What the hell did he feel for Ed?

 

After the brunette woman had gone, Roy had seen the fear in the younger alchemist. It hadn't just been from what Trisha would think, but also fear concerning Roy's reaction. The Colonel hadn't reacted, though. After the woman's emotional tirade, he'd felt too stunned to react.

 

So, he'd done the only thing he could think of…

 

It had felt so right to have Ed in his arms. Wasn't that enough? Did it really matter if Roy loved the teen?

 

Maybe.

 

It might.

 

To Ed it would.

 

The sound of a door closing met his ears and Roy looked up to see the Major walking toward him. The younger man looked down at Roy with a look of undeniable pity mixed with disgust.

 

“So here you are.” The Colonel raised an eyebrow at the simple statement, but said nothing. The Major shook his head, sighed and sat on the floor in front of Roy. “You know… I really don't know what to make of all of this…” The younger man trailed off and seemed to wait for the Colonel to say something. When the older alchemist said nothing, the Major continued. “That kid is your subordinate. I mean… what are you thinking? Let's not forget the fact that he's fifteen.”

 

Roy looked away from the other man. He didn't need to hear this right now…

 

The Major made an exasperated noise and said, “And you call me stupid.”

 

Anger swam through the river of pain and confusion he was feeling he turned his head to glare at his younger double. “You are stupid. Stupid and naïve. You have no right to be lecturing me about anything. Do you think I don't know the risks associated that come with fooling around with my subordinate? Do you think I'm blind to Ed's age, or that perhaps I don't know what consequences I'll be facing if anyone finds out?”

 

The Major opened his mouth to say something, but Roy cut him off. “I don't want to hear anything from you. You and your damn ideals… You foolishly joined the army and became a State Alchemist because you thought you'd be able to help people, but you know what?”

 

There was a slight pause before Roy said, “You won't help anyone.”

 

;-;-;-;-;-;-;

 

The Major's eyes darkened as he stared at the pathetic man in front of him. “With an attitude like that, I can see why you're such an asshole. Even though I'm just one soldier, I can make a difference…” He trailed off as the Colonel laughed bitterly.

 

“Oh you'll make a difference alright, though not exactly in the positive way you'd hoped.”

 

At that statement Roy felt his heart drop. He stared hard at the man in front of him and saw a painful tiredness beyond the dark orbs that were normally filled with smug arrogance. “What do you mean by that?” he whispered cautiously.

 

The Colonel gazed at him thoughtfully for a moment before leaning forward and pulling his gloves out and slowly putting them on. The older man stared at his hands for a long moment before looking up in anguish.

 

“I once thought I could protect the world with these hands,” the other alchemist said in an agonized whisper. “'Be thou for the people'… what a load of shit. Do you know what the truth is Major?”

 

Roy shook his head.

 

“The truth is what is right in front of you. The truth is what everyone says, and what no State Alchemist likes to hear. We're weapons. Dogs. Plain and simple. Anything else is only pretty wrapping. There is nothing admirable or good about what we are expected to do.”

 

The Colonel cast a tormented look at the younger man. “You should have listened to them when they told you not to sign up… Why did you have to be so stupid? Why are you always so stubborn? Why was I…?”

 

Roy swallowed hard when he heard the tremble in his older double's voice, and he had to push away the thought that came to him. The action was such a natural thing to do before he joined the army. But as he watched the Colonel's head lower, and noticed the wet glossy look in the man's eyes, he couldn't hold back.

 

After all, this was him.

 

It was himself.

 

The man wasn't as hardened as Roy had first believed. Not if he could show emotion like this.

 

The younger man scooted over, took a deep breath, then put his arm over the other man's shoulders in a comforting gesture. The Colonel stiffened slightly, then relaxed into the half embrace.

 

“I'd forgotten…” his double whispered.

 

“Don't worry about it.” Roy whispered, then asked, “Why are you still in the army? You seem so against it.”

 

There was a moment of silence then a heavy sigh. “I'm going to become Fuhrer one day. That's my goal.”

 

“You're joking right…” Roy asked in shocked surprise.

 

The older man shook his head. “I couldn't change anything in the war. I… I… killed… a lot of people…”

 

When the Colonel trailed off, Roy said, “It was war…” What war? Certainly not that little conflict in Ishbal... “People die. Soldiers have to kill sometimes…” I don't know that I could ever kill anyone...

 

“No,” the older man said. “You don't understand. A lot. I killed a lot of people. Thousands. Just me… There were other State Alchemists too, but… I can't explain… please… I don't want to… I didn't want to…I had to obey my orders, but…” the Colonel's voice became a bit stronger, “I will become the Fuhrer and I will change the way the military works. As one man, as one soldier, I can't do anything, but as the Fuhrer… I will.”

 

Roy didn't know what to think.

 

Thousands?

 

He couldn't even imagine…

 

The younger man tightened his hold on the other man's shoulders, trying to convey some feelings of empathy.

 

They sat in silence for several minutes listening to the shouts and squeals coming from the three boys who were undoubtedly tearing the kitchen apart.

 

“I want to keep him safe,” the Colonel said softly. “Him… and Alphonse. I want them to reach their goals. I want them to succeed.”

 

“What goals?” Roy asked curiously.

 

No answer.

 

The younger man sighed, and asked, “Do you… do you love him?”

 

The Colonel lifted his head and stared at Roy with a look of painful confusion, but again there was no verbal answer.

 

There was no need.

 

The Major could read what was written in those eyes very well.

 

Suddenly there were two high-pitched screams, a crash, then a long string of curses.

 

The two men looked at each other for a moment, not sure if they wanted to leave the safety of the study or not. Finally Roy stood up and reached his hand down to help the Colonel up. “You know I still think you're an arrogant bastard, right?” he said with a grin.

 

The older man smiled faintly, and took the younger alchemist's hand. When he was standing, he said, “You know I still think you're stupid and naïve, right?”

 

With amused grins on their faces, they crossed the study, opened the door and headed toward the kitchen.

 

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Well, here it is. I know I told some of you that this chapter would have more Trisha/Ed talking, but… it was getting long, and I'm not sure how long the next section will be and I don't want to have some huge thirty page chapter… Besides, I figured ya'll would like to have an update.

 

Now, a question.

 

I have some ideas that I'd love to write that are connected with this story, but they really don't fit in this story, or they might be specific scenes played out in a different way, or they might be scenes that I had to choose from to put in this story (there were just so many ways this story could go). Most of them are lemons (i.e., RoyxEdxRoy, etc.), but not all. Since this story will actually be a lemon free story, I'd like to know how much of an interest there is in me typing up and posting these tidbits.

 

If there is an interest in this, I'll probably post it as something like… Future Memory Drabbles, and it will be posted in the `M' section.

 

- Z

 

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