Fullmetal Alchemist Fan Fiction ❯ Glacial Moon ❯ In Which the Story Begins ( Prologue )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Title: Glacial Moon

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist.

Summary: Diana Elric is the only daughter of Hohenheim of Light and the only female State Alchemist in Amestris. When her half-brothers arrive to take the State Alchemy Exams, she finds that keeping her promise to her father to take care of her trouble-magnet brothers is all but an exercise in futility.

Prologue

Alchemists…Human Artillery… Scientists…Obsessive bookworms… These are all names that describe those who practice Alchemy. When Alchemists are not busy using their Combat Alchemy to destroy or protect, they are busy researching new ways to put their abilities to use, to refine known arrays, and most specially, to refine and encourage the use of Alchemy in different ways from the norm.How do I know this? That's simple. I am an alchemistmyself.

My name is Brigadier-General Diana Anise Elric von Hohenhiem, the GlacierAlchemist and the only known female State Alchemistin Amestris. I am the daughter of Hohenhiem of Light, and the elder half sister to the Fullmetal Alchemist, Edward Elric and his younger brother, Alphonse Elric. I am almost sixyears Edward's elder, and I have been a State Alchemist for nineyears, and it was toward the ending of the ninth year of my tenure as a Dog of the Military that I saw my brothers again, and they were, all three of them, changed. My brother Dominic had been revived as an abomination, neither living nor dead because my father loved him too much, and Edward and Alphonse were tainted with the sin of Human Transmutationbecause I was too occupied with my military dutiesto care for themproperly.

Would that I were stronger, and then perhaps some of these events would not have come to pass, and perhaps Edward and Alphonse would not have suffered as they had, but the past cannot be changed, and that is a story for another time. All I can be glad for is that in the end, Dominic remembered the pact we had sworn as children and knew my faceand was thus laid to rest in peace, andboth Edward and Alphonse have found happiness, and my poor father, who suffered through the sight of his precious children at war amongst ourselves,has been absolved of his many sins.Those I love are either happy or at peace, I cannot be any more content than I am now, for the worst of the conflicts are over, and the reputation of the State Alchemists, under Edward's tender care, is slowly recovering, although we may never shed the epitaph “Dog of the Military.”…

~*~

“Papa? Where are you going?”

The golden haired male looked up into wide amber eyes and he sighed. “Diana… What are you doing out of bed?”

“Papa? Does this have anything to do with Dominic and Dante?”

“So you remember them, huh?”

“I'm fourteen years old, Papa,” Diana said, “I can't forget how eight years ago, we left Drachma after you burned the house after Dominic… After Dominic got sick…”

Hohenheim sighed and reached over, drawing his daughter into his arms. “I'll tell you what,” he murmured, “I'll come visit you when you turn sixteen. Until then, take care of Trisha and the boys for me. Can you do that, Diana?”

“Of course, papa,” Diana agreed. “And when you come back, you can recommend me for the State Alchemy Exams.”

Hohenheim nodded, “Yes. When I come back, I will nominate you for the exams. Now go to bed, and take care of your mother and brothers.”

“Yes, Papa. Safe journey and come home soon.”

Hohenheim gave his daughter a strained smile as he closed his suitcase, and walked out of the house. When he turned back at the gate, he saw the pale figure that was his daughter at the door, the dim moonlight turning her into a spectral figure in her white nightgown and reflecting off his pale hair. He lifted a hand before turning back to the gate and pushed it open. As he allowed the gate to fall closed, he caught a glimpse of another face in the window, and he swallowed hard and made his way down the road, all too aware of his wife watching from the window, and his daughter's suspicious eyes from the doorway.

He did not look back, because he knew that both his wife and daughter knew that no matter what he said, he would not be returning.

~*~

Three Years Later…

“Big Sis?”

Diana paused in her packing as she turned to look at the older of her two younger half-brothers. “Edward.”

“Where're you going?”

“To Central.”

“Why?”

Diana wondered if her father had felt this uncomfortable when she had confronted him when he had left. Certainly she was finding it difficult to look into her brother's eyes, the eyes that their father had given them.

“Papa promised that he would come to visit when I turned sixteen. I'm seventeen now and he's never shown. He's not coming back. That means I have to take care of you and Mother and Alphonse.” She took a deep breath and added, “I'm going to join the military, and I will take the State Alchemy Exams. If I pass, I will use the resources in the National Library to do research so I can take care of all of us, and at the same time, I'm going to look for father. I think he owes us some answers.”

Edward stared up at his elder sister and asked, “Will you be coming back?”

Fierce amber eyes locked on confused gold, and Diana nodded firmly. “I will never leave you. You and Alphonse and Mother. I want to take care of all of you.”

“So… You'll come back and visit, right?”

“As often as I can manage it.” Diana smiled and ruffled her brother's bangs, “I promised yesterday that I'd play with you and Al today, right? Let's make a happy memory before I have to leave.”

“Un!” Edward nodded happily and touched his sister's hand. “Tag, you're it!”

“Ed!” Diana called as the blonde child ran out of the room, “That's cheating!”

“Not so, Big Sis!” Edward called, laughing, “Come on, Al! Hurry before Diana leaves her room!”

~*~

“So… You want to take the State Alchemy Exam, do you?”

“Yes sir.”

“Did you think that there has never been a female State Alchemist before for a very good reason?”

“Yes sir. However, I understand that there is no law preventing a woman from applying.”

“Humph. Very well. I will sponsor you for this exam, but if you fail, then you will be on your own, understand?”

“Yes sir, Thank you, Lieutenant-General Hakuro, sir.”

The Lieutenant-General pushed a file across the desk, and the golden haired girl picked it up and flipped through it as the man spoke again, “You may already know this, but you must prepare on your own for the exam. Might I suggest the Amethyst Alchemist? He may be gruff, but he is a strong Alchemist, and a good leader as well as an honorable man. Any aspiring State Alchemist would do well with his guidance.”

There was a moment of silence as she read through the file and closed it and said quietly, “Understood sir.”

“Very well,” Hakuro said, “I will make the arrangements with him. In the meantime, you may go and spend the day as you wish. Just remember to report in here tomorrow morning at zero-nine hundred.”

“Yes sir,” Diana returned the file to the Lieutenant-General's desk and stood up. “Thank you again, sir.”

“Don't thank me yet, von Hohenheim,” Hakuro growled, “Thank me in three days, pass or fail.”

“Of course sir.”

~*~

“Well, congratulations on passing,” Hakuro placed the watch on the desk in front of the girl. “The Amethyst Alchemist has insisted that you remain in his care, which means that you are now in the tender care of the Brigadier-General Jonathan McKinley either until you die, or your contract ends. The Brigadier-General will be the one to inform you as to your State Title. Make your father proud and don't make me regret sponsoring you for the Exam, Major von Hohenheim.”

“I will not disappoint you, Lieutenant-General,” Diana said, “Thank you for everything, sir.”

Hakuro snorted, “Dismissed.”

Diana saluted, and she tucked the watch into her pocket and walked out of the Lieutenant-General's office.

~*~

TwoYears Later…

“Ishbal, sir?”

“Yes,” Brigadier-General Jonathan McKinley said calmly, his eyes dark. “I am sending you to Ishbal with several other Alchemists by order of the Fuhrer. While you are there, you are under the command of the Blood Iron Alchemist, Brigadier General Basque Gran. Serve him with the same respect you give me.”

“Understood sir.”

“It will be incredibly hard on you,” McKinley said, “But as the only female State Alchemist, you must constantly prove your right to be a part of this military as well as your right to that chain.” He motioned a hand toward the silver chain attached to the young woman's uniform. “I have faith in your abilities, as does the Lieutenant-General Hakuro. Do not prove us wrong.”

“Yes sir.”

“Harden your heart, and see only worthless stone when you attack. You are called the Glacier Alchemist for a reason. Prove it.”

“Yes sir.”

“You leave tomorrow at Zero-Six Hundred Hours.”

“Yes sir.”

“Dismissed, Major.”

~*~

“Did you hear? The Glacier Alchemist is coming to Ishbal.”

“Glacier huh? So he specializes in Ice Based Alchemy?”

“Sure. I heard that his temper is as cold as his Alchemy too though. Rumor has it that he once froze Corporal Waldheim to the chair in the mess hall back at Central when he pissed him off.”

“Whoo, scary. Remind me not to get on his bad side.”

“Not everything about him is bad though, Glacier's Alchemy is supposed to be the most beautiful thing you'll ever see.”

“I am flattered, gentlemen,” a smooth voice said warmly.

The two Alchemists turned slowly and shock registered in their eyes as they noticed the chain of an Alchemist tucked into a collar that was open just enough to draw attention to a generous bosom.

“You… You're a woman!” One cried.

“Yes,” she smiled, and a soft wind blew by, sending golden bangs fluttering around a sweet, sad face in which glittering amber eyes were set, and the high ponytail swayed gently behind her. “You may call me Anise von Hohenheim, or simply Major. You may even call me the Glacier Alchemist, if you prefer. However, whatever you do, do not forget the pain.”

“Pain?” the other asked, too preoccupied with the vision of womanhood at his eye level.

She smiled and backhanded both alchemists, sending them both sprawling. “Do not look at my bust if you please;” she said sweetly, “I would much prefer if you looked at my face instead. At least if you look me in the face, I can be sure that I will not have to assault a fellow State Alchemist before I report them for inappropriate conduct.”

There was an outburst of rough laughter and the golden haired woman turned to face the heavyset, dark skinned man who was known as the Blood Iron Alchemist.

“And here I thought the Amethyst was sending us a wallflower,” he said, “Nice to see you can stand up for yourself, girlie.”

“Thank you, Brigadier-General, sir,” she said, saluting. “Major Diana Anise Elric von Hohenheim, reporting for duty, sir!”

“At ease, Major. I'm sending you to the north. Perhaps a woman's touch will be more effective in quashing this rebellion. Take the Flame Alchemist with you as an escort for propriety's sake.”

“Understood sir.” She paused and added tentatively, “Um… Sir?”

“What is it?”

“Where can I find this… Flame Alchemist?”

“I believe he is one of the two that you just backhanded, Glacier.”

Her eyes widened in surprise and she turned to look at the two men, both of who had recovered somewhat, whereas one was snickering and the other had a blank look on his face.

“So which one of you is the Flame?” she asked.

~*~

Diana extended her arm, her index and middle fingers tucked beneath her thumb. She paused and studied the pale sterling band of the ring containing an incomplete Philosopher's Stone on her middle finger before she frowned and flicked. The stone glowed as her Alchemy stripped the air of moisture to create ice, and the massive icicles fell from the sky, crushing buildings and impaling those who were unlucky enough to be in the way. She snapped her fingers, and the ice melted, and the water was transmuted into acid. Agonized and frightened screams rent the air as the unlucky ones who were splashed by the melting ice or had been impaled by them found the liquid eating through skin and flesh and bone and as the even more unlucky ones stepped into puddles of the corrosive substance and splashed it everywhere in a panic.

She swallowed hard as her other hand flicked outwards, and brought up an earthen dome to keep her targets from escaping. She bit the inside of her cheek, tasting blood and trying not to cry as she pulled up water from underground, allowing it to flood the dome, and siphoning out the air inside to drown whomever was unlucky enough to be trapped.

A portion of city behind her exploded as the Flame Alchemist applied his own unique brand of Combat Alchemy. She flicked again, bringing up a wall of earth to shield herself as debris rained down around her. The air was suddenly filled with dust and ash, light and cold in front of her, heavy and hot behind. Her entire body shook as she forced the water back into the ground, and allowed the ice dome to collapse with a heavy creaking and cracking. If there was still anyone alive after all of that, they would be crushed under the falling debris.

“Harden your heart and see only worthless stone when you attack.You are called the Glacier Alchemist for a reason. Prove it.”

She tried to make herself believe that the portion of the city she had just destroyed was empty, but she knew that someone had been there. The pink traces that had been in the water that streaked the buildings and streets were all the proof she needed. Her entire body shook with the effort of staying in control of herself. A gloved hand brushed over her face.

Diana jerked back in surprise from the rough texture of pyrotex on her cheek and lifted her head to meet concerned dark eyes. That was when she realized she was crying, and she ripped off her parade gloves to dash away the tears on her face. Bad enough that people did not believe females should be State Alchemists because of what the State Alchemists did on the battlefield. The last thing she needed was to prove those bigots right.

“It's alright to cry, you know,” Roy Mustang said quietly, allowing his hand to fall back to his side, “I won't tell.”

“I do not cry, Major,” she snapped as she pulled her gloves back on, “Your explosion sent dust and ash into my eyes.”

Roy nodded, his eyes showing understanding. He shoved his hands into his pockets and walked past her, saying, “Well, if you're done here, Glacier, we should head back.”

“Diana, Major.”

He paused, “What?”

“My name is Diana Anise Elric. Call me either Diana or Anise, Major.”

Roy's lips curved upward slightly. “Then call me Roy.”

~*~

“A drink for the lady,” Roy Mustang said as he handed a bottle to the young woman beside him.

“Is this what I think it is?” she asked quietly, turning the chilled beverage in her hand without opening it and blinked at the label. “I thought this stuff is contraband?”

“It is somewhat difficult to come by,” Maes Hughes admitted as he took a seat beside the young woman, “But alcohol is always in demand, no matter where you are, and especially when you're on a battlefield. And you looked like you needed it, Anise.”

“Thanks,” Diana set the bottle down between herself and her newest partner, “But I don't drink. Alcohol has a tendency to turn me into someone I don't like.”

“A bit young to be speaking from experience, aren't you?” Roy asked.

“This coming from the man who just gave an eighteen year old spirits,” she said without heat, “Hypocrite.”

“Old enough to kill for the State, old enough to get totally smashed, I think.” Roy stared into the fire.

“Easy for you to say. You're legal.” Diana leaned back slightly and tilted her head back to look at the sky. “I'm going back to Central tomorrow. Supposedly, I'll be ferrying some important documents over there, and I won't be returning to Ishbal anytime soon.”

Roy nodded. “That's good. I'll miss you though. You've been good company Anise.”

“Me, good company? Ha.” She lowered her eyes to her clasped hands. “That child obviously didn't think the same…”

“Hey,” Hughes placed a hand on her shoulder, “That was an accident. It wasn't your fault that the kid suddenly decided to run out into the crossfire.”

“Hey, Roy?” Diana suddenly stood up. “When you get back to Central, let's meet up for a bit. By then, I should have devised a way for you to not be useless when your gloves get wet.”

“Who are you calling useless?”

“It's true! How do you intend to rise in the ranks if you can't defeat my Alchemy?”

“I'm not useless!”

“Oh? Take that!”

“Agh! Cold! Get this damned ice off my hands!”

“Aww… Is the great Flame Alchemist unable to get rid of a little ice?”

Roy growled and took a playful swing at Diana, who dodged despite knowing full well that the Flame wouldn't actually hit her with his hands encased in a block of ice.

“Eep! That could have hurt me badly Flame!”

“Get this ice off me before I get frostbite, and maybe I'll just singe you a little bit.”

“Do I look stupid to you? Besides, you can just melt the ice!”

“In case you haven't noticed, I can't make sparks!”

“Stick your hands into the fire!”

“I can't do that! I can't control fire like this!”

“Hah! You admitted that you're useless!”

“Dammit, Glacier!”

Maes Hughes watched his two friends chase each other around the campfire, a bemused look on his face. While a war zone was not the best place for childish antics, he was glad that they had managed to get Anise's mind off that Ishbalan child. Roy may not be at the age where he could be considered a child, but Glacier had just reached her majority. Even if they were not in the best location for goofing off, he was just glad to see that despite everything they had seen and done, his two friends were still able to laugh.

~*~

Three Years Later…

The phone rang softly, and a gloved hand picked up the phone, raising it to an ear behind which was tucked a few stray strands of golden hair.

“Von Hohenheim,” she said curtly.

“Good morning to you too, Glacier.I received an interesting letter that you might be interested in.And surprisingly, it's from Risembool.”

“Lieutenant-Colonel Mustang, please get to the point.”

“Ouch. Your promotion to the rank of Colonel seems to be going to your head.”

“Really, Flame, I have an excess of paperwork and my staff have succeeded in giving me a splitting migraine thirty minutes into the day. Don't make me come down there.”

“Alright, point taken. Have you spoken with your brothers lately?”

“I called home about two weeks ago. Both Ed and Al sounded fine, and when I called Granny Pinako, she said that everything is peaceful enough back home.”

“Then why do I have a letter from two little boys in Risembool asking for the whereabouts of their father, one Hohenheim of Light?”

“What? No, do not answer that. I think I know why. Mind making a trip for me?”

“That's not a problem. I'll get Hawkeye, and we'll leave immediately.”

Diana paused and said gently, “Flame?”

“Yes?”

“Thank you.”

“Hey, what are friends for? It's no problem.”

She hung up and was immediately jumped on by Maes Hughes. “So, Anise, what was that all about?” the bespectacled man grinned, “You sounded like you were getting very cozy with Roy for a moment there.”

“Why did I accept this promotion into Investigations again?” she muttered, “Oh, yes, you and Roy talked me into it.” She shook her head, “Please, Maes, just once stop teasing?”

“Ah, but where would the fun be in that?”

She shook her head in bemusement before wiping her face of all expression. “So, any leads on the investigation into the case involving Monroe?”

Maes straightened. “Nothing. It's been weeks, but either he's given up, gotten more discrete, or he's moved to a different city.”

“I wish,” Diana muttered. “Sex and Alchemy make a very potent mix; theoretically if he activated an array after penetration, he could use his partner's energy for Alchemy. Cutting their throats was just a bonus. He's not going to give up all that easily, and it's not easy to be discrete when experimenting with such mixtures. Gate help us all if he's moved to a different city though. The Brigadier-General and the Fuhrer would have my head.”

“Naw,” Maes reached over to brush a stray lock of hair behind his new superior's ear, “They like you too much. You're the Glacier Alchemist, our one and only female State Alchemist. You're a figurehead to attract female Alchemists, or you will be if the reputation of State Alchemists ever recovers from the incident in Ishbal.”

“I'm no figure head. And you should watch it,” she teased, “Your wife will get jealous with all this attention you're giving me.”

“My lovely Gracia knows all about us,” he said melodramatically, “And she has no problems with you joining our family!”

She held up her hand, index and middle finger tucked behind the thumb in preparation to flick. “Maes, don't make me hurt you.”

Maes chuckled and backed off, holding up his hands in surrender.

~*~

One Week Later…

Roy Mustang flung open the door to the outer office of the Colonel Anise von Hohenheim uncharacteristically violently, though he had enough sense to keep it from slamming into the wall. He stalked into the office, ignoring the salutes from the officers and giving Maes a curt nod in reply to his greeting.

“I'm fairly sure the door hasn't done anything to deserve such treatment, Roy,” the Glacier Alchemist said lightly without looking up from her paperwork.

“A moment of your time if you please,” he said carefully, “It concerns a letter that I investigated not too long ago.”

Diana looked up from her paperwork in surprise. The grim look in the Flame Alchemist's eyes made her decision for her. “All of you, out!” she barked, and the office quickly emptied. “Maes, make sure they don't eavesdrop, please,” she added quickly.

The bespectacled Major grinned and gave her a careless wave as he sauntered out of the office. The door closed behind him with a sharp snap as he flung an arm around one of his colleagues and led them away, melodramatically extolling the virtues of his family while pulling a picture of his lovely wife out of his pocket and brandishing it as he ushered them down the hall.

In the meantime, back in the office, Diana signed a document with a quick flourish, laid it on top of a stack, picked it all up and tapped it on the desk to straighten the edges, and placed it inside a manila file and dropped the entire thing into the outgoing pile before looking up.

“Let me guess,” She said quietly, “The so called advanced courses Edward asked me to help pay for concerned Alchemy, and the two idiots got it into their heads that they could bring Mother back.”

Roy blinked in surprise and smiled ruefully, “In a nutshell, yes,” he agreed quietly.

She sighed. “And here I was hoping that they'd take after father a little bit less. How are they doing?”

“Last I saw? Recovering I should hope.”

“And let me guess, you wanted to bring them to Central, but Pinako threw you out.”

“Why do you ask me these things when you already know what happened?”

She shook her head and leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes and murmured, “If I know Edward, he was awake to hear you make your offer as well as to get your name. He'll come to Central, and if he's not looking for me, he'll be looking for you.”

Her eyes opened and Roy did his best not to flinch as sharp amber eyes held him in a piercing gaze. It wasn't the young woman who he had been partnered with and befriended in Ishbal looking at him now, but his superior officer. His posture straightened as the Glacier Alchemist continued, her voice sharp.

“If that's the case, I leave his well being in your care, Lieutenant-Colonel. Report to me the moment you hear from the Elric Brothers.”

“Understood, ma'am,” he said.

“Is there anything else I should know?”

“The younger Elric brother had his soul bound to a suit of armor, I believe.”

“That bad huh? Never mind it though, just keep your mouth shut and my previous orders still stand. Inform Major Hughes that he is to return my wayward subordinates to the office on your way out. Dismissed.”

Roy snapped a salute and made his way to the door quickly.

Diana picked up her phone and as she started dialing. Roy paused at the door and looked over his shoulder.

“Hey,” Roy said gently, “Don't yell at them too much, okay? They're still kids, and with the results of their spectacular failure, I think they've been punished enough.”

“I'm not going to yell at them, Roy. I'm just letting Pinako know that I'll be paying for the automail if Edward needs it,” she said, “If those two are coming to Central, they'll need the money that's stashed in the house. Now go. I know you have paperwork that needs to be done.”

~*~

Pinako Rockbell had been preparing to start putting together the automail for Edward when the phone rang. She sighed and set down her tools to reach for the phone.

“Hello, Auntie Pinako. It's Diana.”

“Diana,” Pinako said softly, “That Military Dog told you about Edward and Alphonse then?”

“Yes. How are theycoping? Should I request leave and come down?”

“It's alright,” Pinako said, “Edward is planning on going up to Central anyway. Just send enough money for the train for the both of them.”

“Lieutenant-Colonel Mustang told me that Edward is missing an arm and a leg. I'll pay for his automail, Auntie. The money back home should be more than enough to cover thetrip to Central.”

“I will send you the invoice then.”

“Auntie?”

“Yes, Diana?”

“I want to apologize. I know I said that if I couldn't find Papa by the time Edward turnstwelve that I'd come home, but if I know Edward, he's going to want to be a State Alchemist to make use of the resources in the National Library. If that's the case, I'm going to have to break my promise.”

“If it means keeping the fool boy safe, then by all means, break the promise,” Pinako said. “But the moment he no longer needs looking after, promise me that you'll resign.”

“I promise, Auntie. I also promise that the first chance I get, I'll come to visit. I rather miss your apple pie, Auntie.”

“I hope you call first,” the old woman grumbled. “Pie does not make itself, nor can I transmute it the way you Alchemists can. I need time to prepare and bake.”

Diana laughed breathlessly on the other line. “I will be sure to call beforehand then Auntie.”

“Good,” Pinako said in a satisfied tone. “Now I have to go put together your fool brother's arm and leg before I go ahead and make him suffer. Call back more often girl. I want to make sure that you don't lose yourself to those Dogs.”

“Yes Auntie.And tell Ed that when he sees Mustang in Central that he has my permission to make life as difficult for him as possible. The Flame Alchemist needs to get off his high horse for a while, and nothing would amuse me more than to see my precious little brother annoythatflamingcircus pony.Bye Auntie.”

Pinako stifled her laughter as she replied, “Good bye, Diana.”

~*~

Diana was standing near one of the windows, her hands clasped lightly behind her back, as she gazed out, unseeing when her staff returned. It had been years since she had last seen her brothers face to face, and she had even missed her step-mother's funeral. She wished she could help, but she had spent so much time investigating her father's disappearance and possible whereabouts that she no longer had any leave left over, so all she could do was support her little half-brothers in whatever they chose. And send them money of course.

“Anise! How was your chat with Roy? Did the two of you enjoy yourselves? Does this mean there will be a wedding soon? Ah, matrimonial bliss!”

The windows frosted over. “Maes, shut up and go bother someone else. I'm not in the mood.”

“Right away, Colonel von Hohenheim, ma'am!” Maes darted out the door.

“As for the rest of you, don't just stand around, get busy!”

The temperature dropped and the office immediately erupted into a flurry of paperwork.

~*~

One Year Later…

“…And I'm so excited. Really, married life is just wonderful, and you should see my lovely Gracia!”

Roy Mustang had never wished that alchemy could be sent through phone lines more than that very moment. “You've told me this twenty-two times already. Stop tying up military phone lines blathering on about nothing.”

“Our lovely wallflower is rubbing off on you Roy~!” Maes Hughes sing-songed. “So when is the wedding? I just know you'll find married life just wonderful~! I mean, just look at how happy Gracia and I are!”

“Shut up,” Roy snapped and dropped the receiver onto the cradle. He waited several seconds before picking up the receiver again and dialing Investigations. There was a click on the line as someone picked up.

“Von Hohenheim,” a curt female voice answered.

“Anise, I have never asked you for anything in my life, but please do something about Maes or at least shorten his leash!”

Roy adamantly ignored the snickering of his subordinates in the background. Or is it foreground since they were mostly in front of him? Never mind, all that mattered was that Anise gets Maes under control before he flamed him.

There was a sigh on the other line, “I deal with Maeson a daily basis, Roy. Can't you take him off my hands for a bit? It's only a few more hours.”

Roy suddenly felt bad, but stomped the feeling down. If he didn't get away from Maes's blathering, he was going to go insane!

“I swear, just one hour. I'll roast him otherwise.”

“Divert him to Gracia. She'll deal with him. She's his wife, not me.”

“Gracia doesn't have access to military lines.”

Another put upon sigh. “You're lucky I like you, Roy, or I'd be up there turning you into a human Popsicle. One hour, and you're dealing with him until General Hakuro reaches Central, got it?”

“Understood.”

He dropped the receiver back onto his cradle in relief.

~*~

“And Gracia is just glowing!I can't wait till the baby comes! I bet that it's a girl, and she'll look exactly like her mommy!”

Diana's eyebrow twitched as she held the receiver to her ear it her left hand while her right hand signed a document. She knew that Maes was trying to make sure the line was not tapped, and that it was a necessary precaution since General Hakuro was on that train, but really! Did he have to ramble on and on about the same topic? But it was partially her own fault. After Roy's aggravated call, she had contacted the train herself to distract the eccentric and family oriented investigator from the Flame Alchemist lest Roy roast him the second the train came in. One of her staff handed her a file which she took and opened.

“Maes,” she said wearily, “allow me to give you some feminine advice.”

“Yes my dear wallflower?”

“First, stop calling me your dear wallflower. I am your Commanding Officer and you will refer to me as such. Second, you've told me the same thing seven times in the past hour alone. Kindly cease and desist. Third, WOMEN DON'T GIVE BIRTH AFTER ONLY THREE MONTHS!!!” she roared the last sentence into the receiver and slammed it into the cradle.

“Geez,” she muttered, “Why do I put up with him again?”

The phone rang and she glared at it for a moment. It rang again and she snatched the receiver and snarled angrily into the mouthpiece, “I swear to god, if you babble on about Gracia again, Maes, I'll slap you back down to a Private! Don't think I won't do it!”

~*~

When the phone rang, Roy glanced at the clock in surprise. When he saw that it had been forty minutes since his call to Anise, he sighed. The phone rang again and he picked up the receiver and brought it to his ear.

“Mustang.”

“Um… Yes, sir. This is Edward Elriccalling.”

Roy couldn't help but chuckle. The kid was coiled tight and his voice showed it. “Relax kid. Don't be so uptight. You sound like you rehearsed this. What did you need?”

“We're calling from the station to let you know that we're boarding the nine twenty train to Central.”

Hawkeye handed him a report, which he took calmly. “Roger that.” He glanced at the report and then at the clock. He was struck by an interesting idea. “Isn't there another train leaving before that?”

“Um, yes sir.”

Roy smirked. “Get on it.”

“What? But I think it'salready getting ready to leave…”

Roy couldn't help but feel simultaneously amused and sorry for the kids, especially considering what he was about to put them through. “Take it or go home!” he barked. He heard the sound of a train whistle followed by a click on the other line indicating that the boy had hung up. Roy smirked as he set the phone back in the cradle.

“Was that wise sir?” Hawkeye asked cautiously.

“Let's test their luck shall we?” he asked empty air.

Then he remembered that he needed to let Anise know that the boys had contacted him. He glanced at the clock and nodded. One hour exactly. He picked up the phone and began dialing, and there was a quiet click as the line was picked up.

“I swear to god, if you babble on about Gracia again, Maes, I will slap you back down to a Private! Don't think I won't do it!”

Roy winced at the Glacier Alchemist's aggravated snarl. “He got you too huh?”

“Oh, Roy. Is there something you needed?”

He could never get over how aloof she was with people, but in the presence of her staff and his, she would switch moods so quickly that she was in danger of being diagnosed as bipolar. “I just got a call from your half-brother, and I put them on the General's train.”

“Roy,” Anise's voice was dangerous in its gentleness, “What are you planning?”

“I'll let you know if it works.”

“Neither of us has the world on strings, Roy. Whatever you're planning could just as easily backfire in aratherspectacular manner.Remember the incident in Ishbal concerning my parade gloves, a toenail clipper, a wedge of cheese, andan utterly smashed Kimblee?”

The Flame Alchemist winced. That had not been one of his better moments, though in his defense, he had been drunk at the time. Not that it had stopped Kimblee from trying to turn him into a walking explosive. He hadn't been able to sleep for the rest of the campaign since he shared a tent with the explosive loving Alchemist.

“Please,” he said, trying to keep his discomfort out of his voice, “have a little faith. They're your half-brothers after all.”

“Fine. Have you alerted Maes yet?”

“I thought you should know first.”

“Better hurry before someone mistakes Alphonse for a battle ready terrorist.”

Shit. He hadn't thought of that. “I'd better call Maes then.”

“I'll meet you at the station. I want to see how my brothers have grown. Obviously, they won't know that I'm there.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“If your plan works, and Hakuro sponsors them, I don't want anyone calling bias or unfair treatment. Not many people know that I tend to use my father's name, but anyone who looks at my papers will know that we share the same father, those boys and I, and let's not forget that Hakuro sponsored me at the exam. I'll see them after the exams, once they've passed.Oh, and if this harebrained scheme of yours works, Roy, I'll take twofavorsoff that tally.”

“You kept track?!”

“Of course I do. You and I both know that you'd never pay it all off if I didn't. Now, don't you have a phone call to make, Lieutenant-Colonel?”

There was a click on the other line as Anise hung up. Roy shook his head and pressed down on the cradle for a few seconds, and released it, listening for the dial tone. Once he heard it, he started dialing again; only this time it was the contact number for a military line on a specific train…

~*~

One Hour Later…

“So, Mustang… You can do as we say, or we can start killing our hostages, one car at a time. You have until the train arrives in Central to decide, and then the bloodshed begins.”

A smooth low voice said calmly, “Fine, just don't kill anyone.”

“You're in no position to be making demands, sir.”

The line went dead. Roy Mustang set the receiver gently in the cradle and sighed.

“Sir,” Riza Hawkeye said, “The military's policy on negotiating with terrorists….”

“Don't worry,” he grinned, “I have no intention of giving him what he wants. Besides, I have insurance on that train…”

~*~

Maes Hughes blinked as the phone rang, and he picked it up.

“Hughes,” he said.

“Maes, do me a favor and when you speak with Edward and Alphonse, act like you don't know me.”

Maes blinked at the odd tone in his superior officer's voice. “What do you mean Anise?”

“Be professional. If Roy's harebrained scheme works, I don't want anyone screaming bias because of your connection to me. If that happens, Edward might be placed somewhere neither you nor I nor Roy can reach, and that would be a disaster.”

Ah, he understood now. “Alright.”

“Good, I expect a full report when you get back. Now go bother Roy.”

~*~

TBC…