Fullmetal Alchemist Fan Fiction ❯ Passing of Time ❯ Passing of Time ( Chapter 1 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

I still remember it all, as if it only happened yesterday. But, it didn’t. It happened months ago, although, in spite of all the time that has passed, the memories still flow through my mind so clearly, it’s like reliving my dreams and nightmares time and time again…


My name is Winry Rockbell. Although I plan on changing it to Winry Elric, even though my groom has forevermore left me, and this world behind.

I’m almost a grown woman now, to say the least. I’ve lost everyone I’ve ever cared about. My grandmother Pinako has passed on, and my two closest childhood friends-one of them is more to me than just a friend though-have, too, left me. But not in the same way that Grandmother did. No, the way they left me is much more painful in my mind, for I know they are still alive, but yet I cannot reach them. I will never see them. I will never be able to love him again…

Each and every day passes by slowly, at an antagonizing pace, ruthlessly cutting and slicing at my heart and soul, until I have nothing more to do than stare out my window off into the sunset, and allow my tears to fall, and time to pass on.

Life has been very difficult for me ever since Edward and Alphonse left. True, the death of my Grandmother was also hard on me, the loss of Edward has been even tougher on me. On my body, my soul, heart, and mind.

The days have been stressful, as I think back to him. I wonder if he thinks about me still, if he wishes to come back to see me, and hold me within his strong arms, and never let go. I wonder if he wants to see his unborn child grow up, to give our baby the father that he deserves.

As I’ve already said, the days are hard on me, but the nights are no better. For in my dreams, I reminisce on the wonderful moments that Edward and I had shared together while he was still with me, but then those images begin to crack part, and shatter into nothing more than dust and ashes. They are then replaced by my sorrow and anguish, and voices echoing throughout my head, telling me, reminding me, forcing me to remember the painful truth of the reality that Edward cannot and never will return.

Even though I know that my love shall never come back to me, it helps if I attempt to reassure myself, that there’s a chance that Edward, being the revered alchemist he is, is trying to find a way to come back even now.

But in truth, I know that these thoughts are merely illusions, and that he will never come back for me, nor his child that is yet to be born. I’m sure he would if he was able to, but it’s not possible without reopening the gate, and enabling havoc to wreak it’s disaster upon our world, and the other world once more.

The last time the gate was opened, Edward had managed to retrieve Alphonse’s body. But then, Ed had seemed to have disappeared after Al was back inside his body. It turns out that he had to give up something in exchange for the body, and the sacrifice he made was unbelievable. He gave up three years of his life-three years he spent in the world beyond the other side of the gate. When he returned once more, I was overjoyed. We all were. Soon after, it was made known that Edward and I were to be wed. But then, ruin broke out, and a war begun. The people in the other world had soon learned of our own world, and they began a war, wishing to live here, in what they called a “fantasy realm”. Everything went off-course then.

Edward and Alphonse realized the situation, and decided that the only way to stop the war and bloodshed, was to close both sides of the gate. So, after a sorrowful night with Edward telling me of his plan, and taking me as his own one last time, he went to the opposite side of the gate, and began to close the doors. Al was busy shutting the doors on our side, but at the last moment, he slipped through, closed his doors, ran through the gate, and fled to the other world to remain with his older brother.

I was stunned. If Alphonse could have snuck through to the other side, then why didn’t Edward come back through to our world? Why! Why did he have to leave me? Why did he have to…do what was right?

I know that if Edward was here, he’d preach to me about how it wouldn’t be equivalent if he and Al remained here, for they had caused so much trouble during their time here-that it was time to complete their own bargain of Equivalent Exchange. But there was something telling me that there was also a friend on the other side that he missed dearly, and felt as though he needed to see.

No matter how much I think back to all those moments, I know it will never bring him back. I know that no matter how hard I wish for him to come home, he never will. I know that in spite of my hard efforts to keep his voice, his features, his scent, and everything about him with me, they all will fade into dust, just as they do in my dreams-but not as they do in my heart- with the passing of time.