Fushigi Yuugi Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ One More Day, One More Pain ❯ Prologue ( Prologue )

Title: One More Day, One More Pain

Author: Yuki

E-mail address: kirei_usa@hotmail.com

Rating: PG

Genre: Romance/Action

Disclaimers: I don't own the characters that you know in the story, although not many names are mentioned. ^^

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She looked at him pleadingly, to tell her that what he just told her was a joke, it wasn't real, but that wasn't the truth. It was only a fantasy to conceal the reality away. He shook his head and whispered the words to her.

"I'm sorry, but it's the truth…"

Shattering all her hopes away.

She fell down her eyes still locked in a gaze with his. There seemed to be a battle going on that only they could fight in. Emotions strained to come out, tears struggled to escape and life fought to win over death.

"But why?" she murmured out as her eyes drew away from his. Her eyes were lifeless the second those unfortunate words were spoken, but her heart died the second his life force faded away.

"He died trying to save a girl from the soldiers. He would've of won over them if there weren't back-ups coming…" he explained.

"And you didn't try to help him?" her voice was as lifeless as an object, no feeling to it. But the way she said it… it made him feel uneasily. This wasn't the person he had known for the better part of his life. It was someone… without emotions.

"I tried to, but the force was big, we were about to escape when the soldiers finally caught up to us and…" he trailed off, having no need to tell her exactly what happened. She wouldn't have accepted it.

She remained silent, her thoughts controlled about what would've happened if he didn't leave her. But as her thoughts grew, it became wild until she couldn't really control herself. She balled her fists and pounded the ground. Physical pain didn't matter much to her, she could manage it. It was the inner, emotional pain that couldn't be helped. A person once said that time would heal all wounds, but it was just a joke to help people think better of their lives. It wasn't true and would never be. She could already feel the pain intensifying and leaving a scar. It wouldn't heal, it just wasn't possible to. You can't heal a scar of betrayal once it happened, you couldn't stop the emptiness of a person's death once it sets in, time could never heal a wound, it would still be there. Reminding you, and taunting you. You could never escape a wound once it comes, never could, never will…

He wrapped her in his arms and hugged her. She was quite surprised at the gesture but that startle soon demolish as the thought that `he' left her reminded her.

"Let it all out… it'll be all right," he sooth her. Bit by bit, she soon fell asleep, tears still running from her eyes.

"It'll be all right, you'll see…"

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5 years later…

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She smiled sadly at the flowers in her hands and reveled at the softness. No matter how much she tried to forget, struggled to heal her broken heart, it wouldn't work. She would always remember the smile that always lighted her day, the touch that sent chilling warmth all around and that… that kiss that could drive her crazy with a desire of more.

She needed him by her side, right next to her, holding her throughout the days of happiness and sorrow. She wanted him to be the first face she saw in the morning, right next to her. She needed him to pass each day with a heart, right next to her. She wanted him to be the one that she could laugh and talk with, right next to her. She needed him, wanted him, yet fate deprived her of her only happiness…

"Is he that important that you still can't forget him?"

She tensed up, her heart beating at an unreasonable rate as the question brought back painful memories.

"Is he?"

She stared ahead, her back to him as he asked the question again.

"Yes…" she tried to be brave. Tried to hold in the sudden anger and sadness from him, but the wound was still fresh. She couldn't, just couldn't…

"Why?"

Why? She didn't know either. Perhaps, she was just lying to herself, but she didn't know how to react, what to do. Her mind and heart couldn't take, couldn't accept the truth. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't. It was just a useless attempt.

"I… I don't know!" she fell down and stared at the ground. He bend down and tried to pull her up. "Just leave me alone!" she cried out as she pushed his hands away. "I don't need any help! I'm fine by myself!"

He stood up and stared at her. His eyes suddenly took on a fiery glare as his anger grew. He couldn't control it so he let it out.

"Why won't you accept the truth?" he shouted. "He's gone already, stop denying the truth!"

She looked up at him and stare. All her bottled up emotions were unleashed.

"You think I don't want to? I tried, I really tried. But I can't forget, I can't forget what we had together and shared. You think it's that easy to forget someone you cared about? Loved? No it isn't! It's impossible!

"Do you know how hard it is to pass by each day without him? How my heart kept on calling out for him, and the only thing I could do was to try to forget? Each night, I could only cry myself to be able to sleep. And I wondered, what I did to deserve this. My heart was broken. There's a scar, could a scar be healed? No it can't! You just don't understand…" she whispered. "Don't understand how I feel…"

She was suddenly pulled roughly to her feet.

"Wh-"

She was silenced by a rough pair of lips. She kicked, trying to make him let go of her, but his hold was firm. She tried to bite his bottom lip, but he kissed her even harder. Her attempts were futile. She felt… dirty, kissing someone other than her beloved, and she couldn't even stop it.

Limping, she stared into his eyes. And in that second, she found out many emotions that had been in front of her all along, but she never realized. Never took the time to look deeper than what was on the surface.

He was rough, ravishing her lips, causing a bruise, but as it continued longer, she realized that she didn't mind it that much. His hold on her eased, and his kiss were much softer, much more gentle. She could feel all those emotions that she was too blind to see in front of her, in that kiss.

Time flew by, life was born, and that kiss, it awoken something in her that she couldn't really understand. The feeling was kind of similar to what she had felt with `him', but then it wasn't…

The kiss continued deeper and her confusion slowly left her. She began to kiss back. Her rational mind had left her, and her desire took over. She couldn't remember what she had just been yelling about, what her heart had cried over. Instead what she knew, remember now was that she was in a fantasy place that no one could reach her. Where her wants were able to surface…

Abruptly, she felt his lips leaving hers. She was disappointed. She couldn't say that she didn't enjoy it, but then when `he' appeared in her mind, she knew that what she had did was wrong. Of course she knew that the time when it happened. But from that start, she couldn't pull away. It was like she was… she was attracted to it, like a moth to a fly. She couldn't fly away. She couldn't no matter how much she wanted to. She just didn't have the will to be able to.

She stared at her hands, suddenly finding it interesting.

"I- I'm sorry," he whispered out.

She couldn't pull her eyes away from her hands, she couldn't accept what had just happened. Couldn't accept what she had just done. She had betrayed someone she cared about, even though he… she couldn't say it and she won't say it. No matter how long she wouldn't say it. To say it, was to say that the event had actually happened. And that event never happened, but she could think that all she wanted, the reality was still the reality. No amount of hope could actually bring him back.

She never noticed him. He was only the background. Only an invisible person to her, never someone she would love.

From that day he saw her, he couldn't hide his feelings about her. She had opened his heart and took away the loneliness. But it was better if she hadn't walked into his life and opened his heart, if she didn't, all these grief that had suddenly stagger into his life wouldn't appear. All those sleepless nights thinking about her wouldn't occur. Sadly, he was lying to himself. He couldn't imagine what life would've been if he didn't meet her. His life was exceptionally lighter and happier when she entered, but it was also filled with grief and agony.

All his life, he wondered how it would feel to actually love someone and to have that person love you back. Finally he actually felt it. He knew how it would feel to love someone. However there were some parts that he didn't like.

His heart yearned for her the second he laid eyes on her. Her beauty and innocence wound his soul. Her love and dreams hurt his heart. But nothing more than her eyes injured his. They were heavenly and more beautiful than anything else he would dare to say. Emotions, feelings, they pass by and they showed him what and who she was.

He understood her, he could say that, but that didn't matter now. He was too late. She was already swept of her feet. Already gone, leaving his grasps repeatedly.

He stared at her again. His heart aching with the knowledge that he had just broken a beautiful friendship. Their relationship would never be the same…

"I'm sorry!" he exclaimed out. Taking one last look at her, he turned around and ran, ran for his life and his heart. He couldn't stand to be in the same room as her, not when he had done something he couldn't forgive himself for.

"I'm so sorry… Usagi…"

End