Fushigi Yuugi Fan Fiction ❯ How I fell in love with your silence ❯ 3. Longing and desiring ( Chapter 3 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

3. Longing and desiring

Two months swiftly went by.
Sakura and Genrou grew closer each day, despite his emotional conflict regarding her. He figured he liked having her around after all. She kept him company and, as a bonus, his house wasn’t a mess anymore because Sakura would often spend her afternoons cleaning.
After a while, he learned how to trust her. He told her the story of how an awful man named Eikens had taken over his place as the rightful leader of Mt. Leikaku’s thieves and had stolen the magical iron-fan their dead chief had passed on to Genrou so he could take his place once he got back to the hideout. When Sakura asked why he had left the mountain, he confessed to have gone looking for a cure for Hakurou, his leader and mentor, but it was too late when he returned.
The injustice of it all, though, won Sakura’s heart and she would often go over several different plans and ideas with Genrou. She wanted him to be the leader – he would make a fine one.
Koji still visited once or twice a week, bringing by some supplies and news, and Sakura had found in him a great friend. Whenever he would walk in, she felt as if the whole place lit up with his positive energy. He would play games with her, watch her draw, take her for a stroll and teach her. Sakura was always busy when Koji was there.
Who didn’t seem to be too happy with their close proximity was Genrou. He, himself, couldn’t pinpoint the exact reason to why he felt his stomach tied up in knots while watching them together. A part of him just knew Sakura never seemed to  look as joyful in his company as she did in Koji’s. Another part, the deeper one, told him it was his own fault for not being laid-back and easy-going like his friend, at least not with her. But it was hard because Sakura was a girl and not any girl, the only he would have near him.
It made Sakura more or less happy to see Genrou act funny when Koji stopped by. She had a feeling he might’ve been jealous, but she definitely wasn’t about to ask him directly. She was content while watching him be silly to get her attention or pushing Koji out the door.
Sakura sighed dejectedly, staring out the window by the bed. She had been drawing until a moment ago, her beautiful paintings were still drying out by her side, but she was feeling especially lethargic that day and not even sketching seemed to be lightening her mood.
Genrou glanced at her, amused by her endless sighing.
“Ya tired o’ bein’ cooped up?” He asked with a knowing smile. Sakura jumped, startled, but nodded nonetheless. “It must be hard fer ya… stayin’ here all day with me fer company, right? Ya look like the kinda girl who likes t’ run around free.”
“Not at all!” Sakura hurriedly corrected. “I’m really glad you’ve left me stay here with you and I don’t mind your company.”
“But ya are the kinda girl who likes t’ run around, arentcha?” She smiled sheepishly, making him chuckle. “Well, I’ve been thinkin’… just so ya know, I don’t like the idea o’ ya out an’ about but maybe we could go fer a walk in the village… not the one down there, o’ course, ‘cause it’s too close to the hideout but there’s somewhere else a little up ahead. What d’ya think?”
Sakura’s entire face lit up with the mere thought of visiting a crowded place again, after such a long time. She didn’t even have to answer – Genrou knew it right away.
Before leaving, he dug two cloaks out of a box from under his bed; the black one he usually used to go out and a discreet beige one. He covered Sakura with the last, making sure it was firmly tied around her neck by a string, and pulled the hood over her head.
Then they left.
The village Genrou had told her about wasn’t just a little up ahead. In fact, it was more like way! up ahead. By the time they reached it, Sakura was out of breath and cursing names at her companion in her mind. It turned out, however, that her effort was worthwhile, once she finally saw the picturesque sight. She had never been to a village in Ancient China, nor had she seen much aside from their corner in Mt. Leikaku, and it was different from what she had imagined. The long straight-ahead streets were surrounded, both sides, by little merchant stalls and restaurants and taverns. Some windows had red Chinese lamps hanging down and red ribbons in honor of Suzaku and the Konan Empire.
The streets were crowded and, for a brief moment, Sakura felt like she was back in Japan again.
“Ya done gapin’?” Genrou joked, though slightly irritated by her awed reaction to a simple village. Self-consciously, Sakura snapped her jaw shut. “C’mon let’s walk around. Yer way too easily impressed.”
They moved through the crowd, trying not bump into anyone and, at the same time, trying to make themselves not too noticeable. Some people would pear curiously at them, because the sun was hot and they were covered from head to toes. Most ignored them, though.
The smell of liquor suddenly filled Genrou’s nostrils. He was immediately drawn to it and moved towards that direction, thinking Sakura was following him like she had been until then. He was blissfully giddy, he hadn’t drunk in almost three weeks. Since the night he and Sakura had taken that bath together, he wasn’t comfortable leaving her alone in the house while he went out to visit a tavern and drink. He also couldn’t risk getting drunk and put her through it once he got home.
But now seemed like a good time to enjoy a bit of sake. Sakura would probably stop him if she thought he was drinking too much.
“Hey, Sakura, ya wanna get some steamed buns from this real good place I know? It has the best sake in the area too…” He looked behind him for an answer, but his eyes were met with nothing. “Eh, Sakura…? Sakura?!”

Oh no!, Sakura thought panicking. She was lost.
Somehow along the way, Genrou had let go of her hand and she, after admiring the artwork of a street artist, had strayed off. Now, she had no idea where he was, or even where she was.
Not really being able to go back, all she could do was move forward with the crowd.
Sakura found herself in a suspicious street, with old buildings slowly falling to pieces and creepy dark alleys. Several bums were sitting in the steps of an old abandoned house. They stared intensely as she walked by them, her head purposely hanging down so that the hood of the cloak would keep her out of sight. Unfortunately for her, at the same time, a man run out from an alley and, as he made his way back to the public avenues, his shoulder bumped into Sakura, throwing back her hood.
The bums exchanged a perverted smirk. When Sakura went to cover up herself again, one of them quickly moved to take a tight hold of her wrist and stop her. He was older by a couple years, but he already had crowfeet in the corner of his evil-looking eyes. He scammed her up and down hungrily, and Sakura was immediately consumed by a deep fear.
“Ehh! What a beautiful ojou-sama!” The bum said in a mocking voice. “Why don’tcha have some fun with us, huh? We’re real funny guys, ya know? What d’ya say?”
Sakura vehemently shoke her head and pulled her wrist from him. He had a vice grip on it, though, and she only got it tightened to the point where it hurt.
“Aww, don’t be like that!” Another one of the bums added, making his way towards her too. “Just fer while. You won’t regret it after we’re done.”
“What’s goin’ on with her, man? Why the hell ain’t she sayin’ nothin’?”
“Don’t know. Oi! Say somethin’!” The one holding her shoke her rudely to get an answer. Sakura reacted by pulling away from him some more – or trying to, at least. He squinted his eyes, clearly irritated by her lack of response. “Ya think yer funny, do ya? Let’s see if ya still keep yer mouth shut when I do this-” He slapped her hard in the cheek, the impact almost sending her flying. Sakura gasped, tears beginning to pool in her eyes, but the sound came out silent and it finally lit up the light in the bums’ heads.
“Well, look at that… she’s mute! Oh we’re gonna have so much fun with this one, guys!”
Finding this an opening, while they were boasting and cackling evilly, Sakura brought the dagger Genrou had given her out of her dress. She thrust the dagger forward, but the bum holding her had caught the movement in time so it only scratched his shoulder. As he grabbed it, groaning in pain, she made a run for the corner she had turned before.
Another thug caught her by the arm holding the weapon; he took it away from her and put it threateningly against her neck. “Stupid girl!” He disdainfully spat as he took a fistful of her hair to pull her head back.
“Tsk! Where the hell she got a knife? A normal ojou-sama doesn’t go around carryin’ a freakin’ weapon!”
“Don’t matter. Let’s just get this over with before anyone sees us.”
Sakura closed her eyes, tuning them off. She couldn’t watch it anymore. It was a nightmare and she just wanted to wake up, because she knew no one would come and save her. No one would come even if she could cry for help. Just like no one had the last time something like this had happened.
They ripped the cloak off and then went for her clothes. A big and rough hand pushed down the collar of her dress, groping and touching every bit of skin the action exposed. Sakura felt disgusted by the feeling. She just wanted it all to be over with, so that she could go back to Genrou.
Genrou would make everything better.
Genrou was different from all of them.
Genrou!
“Get yer dirty hands off her right now, ya filthy thugs!”
Her eyes opened at the sound. Genrou jumped off the roof of the nearest building, his face set in the most furious scowl she had ever seen him with.
The bums snickered, little intimidated by him.
“An’ if we don’t, what’re ya gonna do, huh? Yer just one against six o’ us, there’s nothin’ ya can do.”
“Wanna bet?”
They lunged at Genrou, but he dodged the sloppy attack with ease and kicked one in the stomach. He fell to the ground. Another one swung a close fist that swished past his nose. Genrou grabbed his wrist, twisting and sending him flying the other way. The other two moved hesitantly, aimed a low kick at his legs. He jumped, flipping over them in the air, copied their move and succeeded.
The one who had been holding Sakura was alone. He took one look at his companions, glared daggers at Genrou and ran off.
Genrou was out of breath after fighting and, previously, from running like an animal through the village, looking for her. When an hour went by and he couldn’t find her anywhere, Genrou felt a kind of panic he hadn’t felt in long time. If he couldn’t find her, he wasn’t sure he could live with himself.
The kanji he had in his forearm had started glowing a while ago. For some reason, Genrou’s instinct told him to follow the direction the red glow was pointing towards. If he hadn’t, maybe he wouldn’t have found her. When he did, seeing those other men touching her, enjoying themselves at her expense, his vision went clouded with rage.
Taking a deep breath, he glanced back at Sakura. His heart felt heavy. Her legs had given out under her, she had her head down, her hair pooling around her like a curtain shielding her face from him, her kimono-like dress was sliding down her shoulders.
“Sakura…?” Genrou tried hesitantly. She didn’t answer or gave any sign of having heard him. He clenched his hands into fists, swallowing down his anger and wrath. He picked up the cloak off the ground, dusting it off, and crouched in front of her without a word. He pushed her hair away, putting her clothes in proper place, careful not to touch her directly, wrapping it around her. “C’mon, let’s go home.”
When he eased her up in his arms, she winced and, for a moment, he wondered if carrying her was the right thing to do. His worries were eased, however, when Sakura clung at his neck as if her life depended on it.
“Don’t worry, ‘kay? Everythin’s fine now. I gotcha.”

Sleep that night was impossible for Sakura. She couldn’t even close her eyes, otherwise the memory of the thug’s dirty violent disgusting hands would take over her mind again. The feeling and the pressure of them was still imprinted all over her body, even after she had scrubbed it more than clean.
The next morning, Genrou woke her up earlier than normally, calling her name softly. He didn’t touch her. Deep down, Sakura wished he did. Genrou’s touch was soothing and it eased every bad memory or feeling she had.
“I have somethin’ fer ya so get up.” After she did, he gave her a package wrapped in brown paper. “Put that on an’ meet me outside, a’ight?” Sakura nodded.
The package was another set of clothes – this one more sportive and dynamic. It was a beige cheongsam and a pair of black tight pants. Very simple, but also elegant at the same time, just a little on the boyish side. And, as Sakura dressed the outfit, it fitted her perfectly, like the other dress had. In the back of her mind, she wondered how Genrou seemed to always get her measurements right, but she shrugged it off and blamed it on instinct.
Once she finished shoving her feet inside her flats, Sakura walked out of the house.
Outside, Genrou was stretching. He had discarded his black coat, hanging it in a nearby branch, he was only in his white shirt and beaded necklaces. His light-colored pants had been tugged inside his mountain boots so that the length wouldn’t get in the way of his agile almost feline-like movements. He smiled a little when he noticed her by the door.
“I see it fits ya,” he observed. Sakura nodded. “Ai’ght. Now, tie yer hair up and copy what I’m doin’.”
Sakura used the rubber band on her wrist to put her hair in a high ponytail. Then, she settled in front of Genrou and began stretching. She was starting to think she was back in her P.E classes. What was the point of doing all those morning stretches?
“That’s enough. Here-” He handed her a thick wooden stick. “I want ya t’ use this t’ try an’ hit me with all ya have.” Sakura’s eyes widened and she was quick to shake her head, objecting to it. “Trust me; ya won’t hurt me. First, I just wantcha t’ blow off some steam an’ then I’ll teach how t’ do it correctly. I ain’t gonna take any more chances. Even after I taught ya to use that dagger, it still wasn’t enough, so now yer gonna learn how t’ defend yerself properly in case I ain’t around.”
Sakura knew it was pointless to argue with Genrou – he always got away with everything he wanted.
Hesitant at first, she swung the stick at him. Genrou expertly dodged it. It annoyed her for some reason that he had done it so easily, so she did it more firmly the next time. When the same happened after the fourth swing, Sakura could feel her anger boiling and her attacks became powerful, releasing frustration and the remaining despair from last night.
They danced around the clearing; Sakura lunging at him, and Genrou moving out of the way. When she was panting, Genrou told her to stop.
She allowed her legs to bring her down and took deep breaths, inhaling through her nose and exhaling out of her mouth. Before she could hold it in, tears poured out of her eyes like rain. Her body convulsed with each hiccup that made its way out of her lips.
Genrou crouched down and stared into her eyes, smiling knowingly. “Feels good, right? Not havin’ t’ hold it all inside…” Sakura hiccupped harder, hiding her crying face in her hands. She felt Genrou pat the crown of her head softly, in a vague attempt of comfort. “Ya know, Sakura, people say cryin’ is fer the weak but, sometimes, it’s good t’ do it. My okashira used t’ say we all got a limit an’ when we reach it, those emotions gotta come out one way or another. Ya don’t have to hold everythin’ fer yerself anymore… ya have me now… ya can share with me…” He blushed a little, but pulled out a grin when she nodded frantically. “Now, stop with the cryin’. I’m gonna teach ya how t’ fight like me.”
By the time the sun was setting, Sakura was fighting very nicely. Not quite like Genrou, or a professional, but better than she ever thought she could in her entire life.
Her teacher was beyond proud.
As he watched her move, performing movements he’d seen countless times, his heart thumped loudly in her chest.
Her clothes are too tight, he thought nervously. The subtle curve of her hips was too evident in the small cheongsam and her pants were too fitting of her thin legs. Her body was strangely hourglass-ish for a girl so petite, or was it just his imagination?
Lost in his musings, Genrou failed to notice the playful gleam in Sakura’s eyes. She swung the stick under his legs and he went down like a rock. Instinctively, his hand grabbed the first thing it could, which turned out to be the hem of her tunic and, consequently, it brought her down with him as well. Sakura found herself straddling him, but all she could do was laugh.
Genrou chuckled.
“Ya think ya got me, huh?” He asked, teasingly. Sakura nodded cheerfully, looking down at him through her long lashes. Fighting the knots in his stomach, Genrou supported her back with his hands and flipped them over so quickly she didn’t have time to blink in surprise. “Ah! Gotcha.”
Sakura smiled nervously, leaning her head back to pear up at his face. Genrou’s cheeks were tainted in pink as he stared back at her. His elbows were on each side of her head and one of his knees supporting his weight in between her legs. His breathing was stuck in his throat.
This wasn’t a very good situation to be in, he figured. That close, all he could feel, all he could see, all he could smell… was her – sweet and loving Sakura. He wanted to reach out and touch her skin. Maybe even lower his head down and kiss her lips, because they looked so inviting, so red and tender. Genrou wondered if she would kiss him back if he did or if she would also run her hand through his hair, as he wanted her to.
Genrou sucked in a wide gush of air and got off her, pretending that what happened had been meaningless. Sakura followed after.
“We’re done fer today. Tomorrow we’ll try some more, ‘kay?” He asked, scratching the back of his head. “C’mon, let’s get somethin’ t’ eat. I’m starvin’”