Fushigi Yuugi Fan Fiction ❯ The Effects of Alcohol ❯ The Effects of Alcohol ( One-Shot )

A/N: Damn the censor. It gives away the ending! Grrr. Well, unless you wandered in here by mistake, and also happened to click "okay" on that little age verification thingy without realizing it, you obviously know that there is some kinkiness contained herein. Kinkiness of the Keisuke x Tetsuya sort. Why is there no Keisuke yaoi anywhere? Sure, Tasuki gets to sleep with practically everybody in the show, but nobody will even write about poor girly Keisuke? *sigh* Anyway…this "plot" went through about two dozen changes before it ended up like this. At one point, it was in the humor section, starred Tamahome and Keisuke, and was rated PG-13. But, uh…as you can see, that's not how it ended up. When I come up with an idea, even a totally bizarre one (and I believe this qualifies as bizarre), it won't leave me alone until I've written it. Please don't flame. If you don't like it, DON'T read it; I don't see how there could be any misunderstanding. This fic is actually a lot sweeter than the summary lets on. Okay, enough. Don't you hate it when the author's notes are longer than the story?

Disclaimer: At some point, these characters acted only at the sole discretion of Ms. Watase. Since then, they have been taken over by the fanfiction writer. They now take part in a wonderful array of non-seishi related activities and are all gay or bi, save for Chiriko, who merely looks too young, and Mitsukake, who nobody likes.

~The Effects of Alcohol~

"I'm leaving, Keisuke!"

A figure removed his head from the refrigerator and waved blindly in the direction of the voice. "Where are you going, anyway?" he asked, extracting a big mug of something and taking an experienced gulp.

"Yui and I are going shopping!" His sister glanced over at the pathetically familiar site of her brother and his friend with the omnipresent sunglasses. "Wanna come?" she asked, quirking an eyebrow at them.

Keisuke scoffed audibly before his friend had time to contemplate a response. "Heh. No thanks, Miaka. Tetsuya and I would much rather stay here and have fun."

"And by "have fun", you mean "get drunk", right?" she teased, gathering up a purse that she thought best complimented her little pleated skirt. "Enjoy yourselves then," Miaka sang as she strolled out the door, thoughts of the food court already dancing about in her head.

"We will!" Keisuke called back. He took an ironically thoughtful guzzle and as an afterthought added, "And we don't always get drunk!"

"Just most of the time," Tetsuya chuckled.

Keisuke raised his eyebrows dubiously at his friend and leaned against the kitchen counter. "Like you have any recollection of how drunk we get."

"What do you mean?!" Tetsuya shot back playfully. "You drink five times as much as I do!" He sprawled out on the Yuuki's couch and rested his head on his arms. "If there's anyone who has fuzzy patches in their memory due to stupors of drunkenness, it's you!"

Keisuke took a long gulp and went to the refrigerator to refill his mug. "Can you honestly tell me that you remember everything we do after eight beers?"

"Uh…well…" Tetsuya paused and sorted through a jumble of unaccountable instances whose origins he could not quite pinpoint. "I kinda remember baking something last Saturday…"

"Hey," Keisuke muttered to himself. "So do I! Wow," he continued, running a hand through his hair in contemplation. "I forgot about that… What did we make anyway?"

"Uh, I think we tried to bake a cake."

"Really?" Keisuke refilled his mug again. "That's odd. I don't remember us baking a…" A wave of something vaguely resembling nausea passed over his face very suddenly. "Did we put this cake in a tupperwear container, by any chance?"

Tetsuya shrugged. "I don't know. Probably."

"Ohhh…" Keisuke groaned, placing a hand over his stomach. "I think I ate it the other day."

"Gross," shuddered Tetsuya. "Are you sure? Why the hell would you eat something that we made when we were drunk?"

"I thought it was leftover chicken salad!" The college boys emitted twin breaths of disgust. "Don't help me remember what ingredients we used, okay?"

"Sure." Tetsuya sat up and eyed the fridge. "You know, I think I'm going to pass on the beer today."

"Oh?"

"Yeah." He rubbed his head and pushed his trademark shades up on his nose. "I wanna see what sober fun is like."

"Really," Keisuke said flatly. "Suit yourself. Anyway, we don't-"

"I mean…" Tetsuya continued. "…I bet we wouldn't let ourselves do half the stuff that we do when we're under the influence of alcohol."

"Under the influence. You sound like a cop." Keisuke took a giant swallow and made his way over to the couch. "You really think we act that different?"

Tetsuya shrugged. "I don't know. I'd say we're a lot more daring. Being drunk gives us an excuse to do things we would never have the guts to do in real life, and then dismiss the behavior as if it were nothing when we realize how we acted."

"You think too much. And talk too much."

"I guess we're braver drunk. But it's not necessarily our true selves."

"Maybe." Keisuke settled onto the couch next to his friend and smiled goofily as he set his mug on the coffee table.

"Are you already drunk?"

Keisuke grinned. "Maybe."

Tetsuya sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Hey Tetsuya."

"Hmm?"

Keisuke brought his mug up to his lips in careful deliberation, as if drinking helped him think. "Who do you think is hotter, my sister or your sister?"

"I don't have a sister."

"Oh yeah. Well…" Keisuke thought about this for a moment. "Okay then. How about Miaka versus Yui?"

Tetsuya blushed slightly and looked down at his hands. "Keiuske! I don't want to compare your sister to Yui!"

"I bet," Keisuke paused for a drink. "…that if you had a sister, she'd be hot."

"Erm, thank you, Keisuke." Tetsuya raised one eyebrow above the frame of his glasses. "I'd agree with you, but I don't think I should go around saying that my theoretical sister is hot."

"Why not?" asked Keisuke, getting up to refill his drink. "I'd admit that my theoretical sister was hot."

"You don't need a theoretical sister! You have a real one to call hot!"

Keisuke jerked his head out of the fridge and stared at the figure on the couch in offense. "Eww, Tetsuya. I don't know about you, but I don't go around calling my sister hot."

"I don't have a sister!" Tetsuya sighed in exasperation and collapsed back on the couch while Keisuke playfully punched his arm.

A small voice in the back of Tetsuya's head, one that usually behaved itself and remained quiet, began to whine internally and wish that Keisuke weren't so drunk already. Keisuke, the nonstop party machine. The secretly sensitive boy who cried whenever a Suzaku seishi died, or when Tamahome and Miaka broke up for the twelfth time. His friend of who knows how many years. His friend…who he was a little attracted to.

Okay, very attracted to.

Unfortunately, that friend was not thinking quite straight at the moment, and Tetsuya didn't want to potentially confuse him anymore than carrying on a normal conversation already would. It'll have to wait...

Keisuke took a swig and swallowed contentedly. "Eh, lighten up. I don't think any less of you because of your incestuous tendencies."

Tetsuya opened his mouth to protest, but shut it again upon closer inspection of possible outcomes of the conversation.

"Ya know what's good about sisters?" Keisuke asked suddenly, popping up from the couch again.

"What?"

"Hang on." Keisuke grinned, pushing Tetsuya against the couch in an indication to stay put. "I'll show you." He trotted out of the room and down the hall, leaving Tetsuya alone to spend some quality time with Keisuke's mug. He was tempted to take a sip, but his attention was diverted by the clearing of a throat before his hand could make contact with the drink. Tetsuya looked up.

"Oh. My. God." His eyes looked his friend up and down several times before his mind could register the image. Keisuke had somehow managed to squeeze himself into one of Miaka's bright red sweaters, the material threatening to snap at the pull of chest muscles for which the sweater was not designed. Moving his gaze lower, Tetsuya noted the matching plaid skirt that come to an abrupt halt a foot and a half above his knees, flaring out slightly against the body that it was not meant for; how Keisuke even got it on was a mystery for the ages. The ensemble was completed by white knee socks, pulled over muscular calves with almost natural looking tightness.

Keisuke looked, much to Tetsuya's amusement and horror, pretty damn good.

"You like?" Keisuke asked in a high falsetto as he spun around to show off the full allure of his sister's clothing.

Oh god… Tetsuya gulped and crossed his legs over the physical reaction that he was positive was growing in his pants. He stared at the floor and tried to keep from wondering if there were panties to match, though his gaze kept wandering north anyway. Feeling his resolve dwindling away to nothing, he figured he should say something to snap his attention back to the absurdity of the scene, rather than the other responses the image called up: "You are very drunk."

Keisuke giggled and fluffed what he could of his hair. "No wonder Taka likes Miaka so much. Anybody would look hot in this outfit." He flattened the skirt against his legs and tried to turn around to get a view of his backside. "Does this make my butt look big?"

"Very drunk," Tetsuya mumbled again.

The other man paid no attention and instead reached into the cabinet and ripped open a bag of cookies. "Look! I'm Miaka!" He proceeded to stuff as much as he could into his mouth, not having much regard for the possibility of choking, as most of the cookies were dropping to the floor anyway. "I don't understand how she doesn't get fat," Keisuke mused, throwing the cookies off to the side. He reached for his mug, took a drink, and sat down next to Tetsuya, who now had a pillow laid protectively across his lap.

"I know! I'll be Miaka. And you can be Taka. Hey," Keisuke stared blankly at a distant spot on the wall. "Miaka and Taka rhyme."

"Err…" Why does he have to tempt me like this? Tetsuya inched over towards the other end of the couch and monitored Keisuke's movements out of the corner of his eye. Unfortunately, his friend merely slid over too and placed his hand over Tetsuya's, winking slyly.

"Uhh…huhhh…Keisuke…You're drunk…" Tetsuya stuttered, trying to convince himself not to take advantage of the situation.

"So?" Keisuke whispered, twirling a strand of Tetsuya's hair around his finger as he moved in closer. "Don't you love me, Taka?" he asked in a high voice, batting his eyelashes.

Tetsuya squeezed his eyes shut under the dark tint of his sunglasses, Keisuke's insistent breath tickling his neck. He's drunk! He doesn't know what he's doing! I can't let him do this…even though I want it… "Keisuke. Knock it off," Tetsuya insisted, pushing his friend away lightly.

"Don't be a tease, Taka," Keisuke replied, still in his imitation of Miaka. His hand slid down from Tetsuya's hair and wandered over his shoulder, conveniently placing an arm across the man's chest. "Let's make out. And then get some fried chicken." He smiled, reaching into Tetsuya's lap to discard the pillow. It flew across the room in a forgotten path a flight, Tetsuya's hand trembling too much to be able to hold it down.

"Uhhh…" Tetsuya trailed off, feeling the weight of his friend weight vanish from were it used to be, pressed against his right thigh, and reappear, more evenly distributed, over his lap as Keisuke straddled him, kneeling on the cushions on either side of his legs. Oh god, Keisuke… I'm not going to be able to stand this much longer.

"It's okay, Taka. Nobody's home to catch us fooling around," Keisuke insisted in a high voice. His eyes narrowed seductively. "Kiss me already…" The other end had no chance to reply as Keisuke brushed his lips across Tetsuya's.

Tetsuya's eyes widened behind his sunglasses. I don't want to take advantage of him if these aren't his real feelings, but…I can't hold it in anymore… His hand began to move across Keisuke's back, pulling his body in closer as he allowed himself to return the kiss.

Fingers moved across his face and found the sunglasses that had always concealed the feelings hidden within his eyes. They bounced off the couch and fell to the floor. "Tetsuya…" Keisuke whispered against his mouth in a low voice.

Tetsuya moaned softly and parted his lips against his friend's mouth, dipping his tongue into the warm depth that Keisuke allowed entrance to when he spoke. Their tongues met, hesitantly at first, and melded together with increasing intensity as Keisuke wrapped his arms around the other man's neck, crushing their lips together furiously.

Tetsuya leaned back against the couch, pulling Keisuke closer as his fingers ran over the tight stitches of the sweater. He could feel every muscle twitch under his touch as he worked his arms around the other man's waist, and back again to press his palms up against Keisuke's chest.

They exchanged small pants of pleasure into the other's mouth as they kissed, swirling their tongues together in an inconsequential battle for dominance. Fingers wandered up the back of Tetsuya's neck, making the hairs stand up on end as his fingertips danced over the boyish muscles to tangle themselves in silky strands of familiar yet untouched beauty.

Keisuke slid further up in Tetsuya's lap, bringing himself up slightly on his knees to press his hips into the other man's abdomen. Tetsuya gasped into the kiss as the scorching heat between his friend's legs made itself known against his body; a welcome presence. Keisuke began to lick his way down the hard jaw line of his friend, stopping to graze his teeth roughly over the tendons of his neck as Tetsuya threw his head back in nearly inaudible pleasure.

The heat between their bodies increased as Keisuke pressed up against him, his hands exploring the broad expanse of Tetsuya that had never before been available for discovery. Tetsuya, in return, ran his hands in massaging whirls of worship along Keisuke's back, causing the man to whimper more and more with every inch lower that Tetsuya traveled.

His fingers soon found the waistband of the skirt whose arousing image had almost been forgotten in the sudden activity. Slender fingers passed over the bunched up fabric that folded over the curve of Keisuke's hips, hiked up slightly from kneeling over his friend. Tingling spasms of pleasure tickled Keisuke's outer thigh, visible under the plaid skirt, as Tetsuya's palms flattened over his muscular legs.

Tetsuya caught Keisuke's gaze as the man's mouth pulled away from his neck; his arms did not echo the movement in the very least, still desperately clutching the collar of the other's shirt. His eyes offered nothing, drunkenness or otherwise, but unconditional, undying affection as the hands on his thighs continued their journey towards the hem of his sister's skirt.

Tetsuya reached over and brushed a stray lock of hair out of his friend's eyes, trailing his fingers down the soft curve of his cheek. Keisuke matched it with the gentle brush of his hand against Tetsuya's, closing over it and drawing it to his lips.

The other man began to inch up the hem of the skirt with the hand that lingered on Keisuke's thigh, sliding the bunched fabric up higher and higher until his fingers stopped, mere inches away from the unnatural lack of flatness that interrupted the innocence of the ensemble. Tetsuya ran his hand in between Keisuke's legs, caressing his inner thighs, causing tremors of excitement to shoot through both bodies.

"Bet you never thought you'd be going up another guy's skirt," Keisuke murmured, grinning slightly as Tetsuya's hand joined the other in the crevice of his lap.

Tetsuya smiled grimly. "Never thought you'd get that drunk." Please don't hate me for this later…

He slowly lifted up the entire skirt, mentally confirming what he had wondered about before: women's panties. Contained within them was the very prominent visual evidence of Keisuke's arousal. Tetsuya ran his hands up the remainder of his friend's lower body, brushing almost teasingly over the bulge that threatened to stretch the cotton panties to the breaking point.

Tetsuya looked up and briefly caught the expression contained within the eyes opposite his; the only thing they were glazed over with was pleasure. Leaning foreword, he planted a kiss on Keisuke's forehead, his arms still wrapped around his neck as he writhed against Tetsuya's negligent touch.

Gripping the elastic of the thin fabric between his thumb and forefinger, Tetsuya pulled it away from Keisuke's stomach and down over the throbbing heat that was revealed as the undergarment slid down over muscular thighs, around bent knees, and down to the useless abyss of the carpet as legs temporarily lifted to allow its unceremonious exodus.

"Oh god, Tetsuya…" Keisuke moaned softly as the other man gazed down at him in equal worship. Tetsuya hesitantly placed a hand on Keisuke's inner thigh, stroking the sensitive skin as his friend exhaled heavily, his chest heaving in synchronization.

Slight wisps of fingertips passed over Keisuke's erection, causing a small gasp to escape the man's lips. He looked at Tetsuya through lidded eyes and leaned foreword, capturing his mouth and pressing his hardness into his hands.

Tetsuya's fingers found Keisuke's length, wrapping around it lovingly as he kissed back. Draping one arm loosely over his friend's shoulders, Tetsuya slowly began to stroke it up and down, each movement sending shivers of enjoyment up Keisuke's spine.

"Please, Tetsuya…" he whispered, pumping his hips lightly into Tetsuya's fist. Fingers wove their way into dark brown locks of hair, tangling it between slender fingers as Tetsuya's pace quickened. Keisuke moaned softly with every pass, his hips thrusting with increasing intensity as they acted of their own will.

Tetsuya felt nails dig into his shoulder blades as he ran his hand over Keisuke's length, skimming over the tip with his thumb in tantalizing circles. Leaning foreword, he brushed his lips against his friend's, the thrust of his hips nearly impaling Tetsuya himself with their force. "I love you, Keisuke…" he whispered against his lips, well aware of the fact that soberness would probably delete the memory from his mind; he uttered the words softly nonetheless.

"Uhhh…Tetsuya…hurry…I'm going to…" Keisuke thrusted into Tetsuya's touch, squeezing his eyes shut as he threw his head back; arms around Tetsuya's neck and knees framing his slender form as a shudder wracked Keisuke's body, sending his seed into Tetsuya's waiting hand.

They sat facing each other for a moment, both breathing heavily, as if Tetsuya's role was just as fatiguing. He slowly released Keisuke's softening member, their arms still around one another. Their hearts pounding against one another.

The front door slammed shut.

"I'm back! Do we have any ice cream?"

Keisuke's eyes went wide. "Oh shit." He quickly yanked Miaka's panties off the floor, not bothering to try and put them back on, and grabbed a blanket that was draped over the back of the couch. Footsteps grew louder as a figure finally entered the living room.

"So do we have any… What's wrong with you?" Miaka looked suspiciously over at Keisuke, who had a blanket pulled up to his chin and was making a very odd face, and Tetsuya, who was simply sitting next to him, staring blankly through hastily retrieved sunglasses and holding his hands in his lap.

"I'm cold," Keisuke replied. "Can't a guy be cold?"

Miaka rolled her eyes and went over to the fridge. "You are so odd."

"Why are you back already?" asked Keisuke, watching her shovel a whole container of leftover dumplings into her mouth.

"Well…" Miaka shifted a little out of embarrassment. "I got hungry and I didn't have any money left. So then Yui lent me some…and soon Yui didn't have any money left either."

Keisuke groaned.

"So we decided to go shopping another day." She walked over to the coffee table and noticed Keisuke's mug. "Oh darn! I completely forgot to buy you more beer! Sorry." She took a drink and set it back on the table. "Poor thing," she teased. "You haven't had a beer in days."

Tetsuya sat up. "Then what's that?"

"Huh?" Miaka asked, pointing to the mug. "This is just apple juice." Suddenly feeling hungry again, she wandered back to the fridge.

Tetsuya jerked his head over towards Keisuke, now a mere head protruding from a mass of blanket. "Apple juice?"

"Well…" Keisuke mumbled against the cloth. "Do you think I would have risked crawling into your lap if you thought I was sober?" He glanced at Tetsuya out of the corner of his eye. "I love you too…by the way."

~The End~