Gensomaden Saiyuki Fan Fiction ❯ What if ... ❯ What if ... ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer : I don't own Saiyuki. Kazuya-sensei does. Lucky lady …

 

 

Author's note : I believe many loved Saiyuki because the characters were just perfect for their roles in the series. (Applause please for Kazuya - sensei brilliance ! ) So for fun sake, I'll bring you all to a journey on a few what if. Just a few random thoughts to break my writer's block. Enjoy!

 

 

 

What if …

 

1. Goku is the playboy not Gojyo

 

Goku : I'm *hungry*.

Hakkai : Ano, I thought you've already had a few girls from the last town.

Goku : But I'm still *hungry*.

Gojyo : Can't you think anything else but sex, monkey?

Goku : None of your business kappa! The girls weren't that nice. And it's not my fault I'm sexually overdriven. All YOU know is food.

Gojyo : Well, I'm the expert, monkey. No food can escape my delicate tongue.

Goku : Don't call me monkey, you baka kappa!

Gojyo : Ero saru!

(THWACK !!! THWACK !!!)

Ouch! Ouch!

 

Hakkai : Ano … I don't think Kazuya sensei wanted *this*…

 

*Click*

 

Sanzo : Give me back my fan, Hakkai.

Hakkai : Maa … maa … just testing.

 

 

2. Hakkaiis the holymonk.

 

The Sanzo ikkou …eherm…Hakkai Sanzo ikkou just reached a town whereby they were swiftly recognized. Hordes of adoring fangirls … I mean, town people closed on them with whispered awe.

 

Old Man : Holy Sanzo, we beseech your presence in our town. Please stay for a while.

Hakkai : Yes, that will be fine for us. And please don't call me Holy. I'm unworthy.

 

Hakkai bowed slightly while his three companions looked on. The old man was impressed with the young monk humility. It seem that the gossip were untrue after all. Sanzo is definitely not a rude, gun totting, chain smoking, and alcoholic bad tempered blonde bishounen.

 

He smiled as he returned the bow.

Old Man : Let us serve you food and prepare your place of rest.

 

Later …

 

Genjyo : WHAT THE HECK ARE THESE, HAKKAI?!

Hakkai : Vegetarian food.

Gojyo : Hey … hey … where's the booze and smokes?

Hakkai : I'm a monk, remember.

Goku : Ne Hakkai, I'm still hungry …

Hakkai : Fasting is good for the soul.

 

Much later …

 

Genjyo : WHERE'S THE BEDS?!

Hakkai : As true follower we must discipline ourselves against worldly comforts.

Gojyo : I'm going out to find a girl for a pillow.

Goku : I'm hungry.

 

Much much later …

 

Genjyo : WHERE THE HECK IS THAT MONK?!

Gojyo : He's still preaching to the towns people.

Genjyo : What kind of preaching is that?! Its been three weeks!

Goku : Ano, Genjyo, I think he's going to open a school.

 

Famous vein twitch on famous blonde forehead.

 

Genjyo : I'M GETTING MY ROBE BACK !!!

 

 

3. Sanzo doesn't have a Smith & Wesson.

 

Goku : Give me back my spring roll, kappa!

Gojyo : Didn't see your name there, saru…

Goku : Don't call me saru, you ero kappa cockcroach head!

Gojyo : What?! Say that again?!

Goku : Cockroach!

Gojyo : Why you … Stupid monkey!

 

RAT TAT TAT TAT TAT TAT TAT TAT!!!!

 

Gojyo : THAT'S A BLOODY MACHINE GUN!!!

Sanzo : Die.

Hakkai : Maa … maa…aren't we active this morning?

 

 

4. `Somebody' is a virgin.

 

He ran his finger on bare skin and the man under him writhed with pleasure. He smiled as he worked his delicious fondling lower finding a hard jutting member. The other man gave out a low moan that reverberates throughout the silent room. Pre cum leaked through the opening as he squeezed slightly and the other man surrendered to the passion. With that the added silkiness he slid one finger lower and gently slid one finger in the tight opening.

 

“Ahhhh….ahhh…”

 

“You're ok?”

 

He added another finger. And scissoring it to loosen the muscle apart. At the same time going in and out to encourage friction and pleasure.

 

“SSS…stop…stop…”

 

“What? … Why?”

 

“I've never done this before.”

 

“With a guy, you mean?”

 

“I never had sex before!!!”

 

Silent. And more silent.

 

Hakkai : Ano…you're suppose to be the playboy in this story, Gojyo.

 

Gojyo blushed.

 

Hakkai : With great power comes great responsibility.

 

Gojyo : WHAT THAT GOT TO DO WITH THIS STORY?!

 

 

5. Goku is not so naive

 

Hakkai looked up at Gojyo who suddenly walked up to the door.

 

Hakkai : Where you're going Gojyo?

Goku : Oh I think he's just going to find some hot pussy to play with and then come back to show how sexually active he is when in fact he's having some middle age problem as his dick are getting worn out and … really quite small.

 

Silent.

 

Silent.

 

THWACK!!! THWACK!!!

 

Goku : OUCH!

 

*Click*

 

Sanzo : (Vein twitching) My fan, Hakkai.

Hakkai : Ano…sorry, I was a teacher by the way.

 

6. Goku & Gojyo are actually lovers.

 

“Ugh! Ugh! Ugh!”

 

“Harder Gojyo… I can't … Oh god…”

 

“Oh baby … you feel so tight… so good…”

 

“Gojyo! Please!”

 

“Yes..oh yes…Goku…fuck…”

 

Hakkai : Ano…both of you do realize we are on the road?

 

Oblivious, those two were too far gone humping each other on a moving jeep.

 

“Gojyo! Gojyo! Faster !!! ”

 

BANG! BANG!

 

Sanzo : SHUT UP!!!

 

Hakuryu : Kyu…

Hakkai : Yeah, I know Hakuryu. I'm also getting a little horny too.

 

 

7. Yaone is a bishounen ( pretty boy)

 

Yaone : Lirin-sama! Did you disturb my medicine again?

Lirin : I didn't … just… Doku San said nii-chan need some medicine … so…

 

Yaone covered her face and nearly swooned but was caught by Lirin.

 

Lirin : Gomen! Did I do something wrong?

Yaone : Oh Lirin-sama, you've just given my own special treatment.

Lirin : Then … then … it's good right?

Yaone : Well…

 

In another room.

 

Kougaiji : Hey Doku, are you sure these are Yaone's medicines?

Doku : I asked Lirin to fetch it from Yaone.

 

Kougaiji grimaced as he realized what had actually happened.

 

Kougaiji : Get me an antidote.

Doku : {Deep red blush on his face } But … Kou-sama … you look really nice with big breast.

Kougaiji : Oro?!

 

 

 

8.Gojyo is bald

 

Many inconveniences….

~ He would not be sexy. - Bad

~ Goku could not call him cockroach. - Good

~ Any hit from Sanzo would really hurt. - Bad

~ Doku would have to look for a bald headed prince for a master. - Hmm…

~ His head will shine brighter than Sanzo's hair. - Good

~ Goku will be confused. - Bad

~ Hakuryu cannot land on his head. - Good; Never was a good landing spot.

~ He would be called bald headed not red headed. - Hmm …

~ Cost on shampoo and hair cream would be less. - Good

~ I would have to buy some wig - Bad

…

 

Gojyo lean down to look at Hakkai. He grimaced when he read what Hakkai had been writing. The green eyed just looked up and smiled sweetly.

 

“So … do you want me to buy a scissor?”

 

* This is `what if' in Hakkai's head.

 

 

9.Goku is a good cook.

 

Sanzo was wondering. Just an hour ago there were these noises in the kitchen. He had looked inside and find Goku busily cooking. He didn't say anything but just watch as Goku deftly cutting the meat and vegetables with impressive preciseness.

 

He just stood there, amazed, but didn't showed it as he heard Goku murmuring to himself of exotic ingredients in ounces and pinches.

 

Soon there was heavenly aroma sweeping from the kitchen. Sanzo felt his mouth watering and not wanting to look like an idiot he just walked out.

 

“Is the monkey cooking just now?” Gojyo's word shook him.

 

“Yeah…” Sanzo grunted but his mind still anticipating the source of the heavenly aroma.

 

“How come there's no smell now?”

 

“…”

 

“Goku!!!” Sanzo took off to the kitchen. In moments, Hakkai and Gojyo heard gunshots and fan hitting head. Followed by Goku's whining.

 

“What the hell happened?”

 

“Ano Gojyo…” Hakkai smiled awkwardly “… I think Goku ate all his food.”

 

Gojyo rolled on his sofa.

 

“Haraheta…”

 

*I'm hungry.

 

 

10. Sanzo-ikkou had forgotten something important.

 

Finally, after more than a year traveling a dangerous journey, killing hundreds of youkai, nearly died a few time and plummeted by rain, snow and dust, the Sanzo ikkou reached the border of India.

 

At the border counter.

 

“Can I have your passport, sir?”

 

Sanzo, Hakkai, Gojyo and Goku looked at him blankly.

 

 

 

End