Gravitation Fan Fiction ❯ Cats, Crutches and Babies? Oh My! ❯ A Hand to Hold ( Chapter 35 )

It was December twenty-third and Eiri, who was in a particularly foul mood, sighed coldly as he watched Shuichi haul yet another bag of decorations and food into the apartment. The boy was as happy and bouncy as Yuki had ever seen him despite the fact that he had been battling the holiday crowds all day, and his cheer was only serving to annoy the novelist further.

Shuichi was so full of the holiday spirit in fact that Eiri thought it might make him physically ill if he had to hear the idiot spout one more poorly translated Christmas carol.

Though he had tried many times to understand it, Eiri just couldn’t fathom getting enjoyment out of celebrating some silly holiday that for himself and most of the country, carried no religious meaning whatsoever. He knew it did carry religious meaning for people in other countries, however in Japan it had been the large corporations and department stores viewing it as a western oddity they could play around with that resulted in its eventual popularity and its permanent place amongst the end-of-year events and traditions already in observance. Of these events, Christmas tied in especially well with Oseibo, the tradition of giving gifts at the end of the year to those whom you wished to appreciate or thank, and it helped boost already elevated December sales figures for department stores across the country. In short it was just another commercial holiday that encouraged people to part with their money; a holiday in which Eiri had no particular interest in participating, fiancé or not.

Shuichi smiled when he saw his lover moping miserably on the sofa.

At least he’s out of his office, he thought brightly.

He made a quick trip into the kitchen to put his groceries in the fridge and then went back to the living room to try and get his lover to help him decorate.

“Hey grumpy,” the vocalist joked in a sing-song voice, “Want to help me hang up these--”

“No.”

“Aww, Yuki come on! Please?”

“No.”

Shuichi set down the bags he was carrying and went over to sit beside his partner on the sofa. Snuggling as close to Eiri as the man would let him, he continued pleading.

“But this is our first Christmas together as an engaged couple! Don’t you want it to be different? Like, extra special?”

“No.”

“But don’t you--”

“No, no a thousand times no!” After pushing Shuichi away, he got up off the couch and back onto his crutches. “How many times do I have to say it before you’ll understand?”

“Wh-- but, Yuki?” Shuichi cried, his voice conveying how much his lover’s coldness hurt him. He just wanted to experience what every other couple experienced at Christmas; feelings of love, togetherness, and romance, but apparently that was too much to ask for.

“God Dammit, Eiri!” the shorter man hollered in frustration, “I thought we were past all this! What the hell has gotten into you?”

Eiri paused in the doorway and sighed. He turned around slightly, his mouth open as if he were about to speak, but nothing came out. He stood there for a few seconds, the tension in his brow lifting momentarily as if he were going to apologize, before he whipped around in a huff and limped off to his study. Shuichi, who was on the verge of tears, flinched when Eiri slammed the door.

The sound resonated through the quiet apartment and Shuichi, more than he was emotionally wounded, was confused by the sudden shift in his lover’s behaviour. They’d had their rough patches certainly, but for the most part it had appeared to him that they were both happy; though, perhaps he was wrong.

How could he be stupid enough to think that an engagement ring and a little sentiment were magically going to fix all of their problems?

Each and every year they had been together, Christmas was the same. The blonde would skulk about the apartment brooding, complaining, and snapping at any attempt at communication Shuichi tried to make; That is, on the rare occasions that he actually came out of his office.

Shuichi had hoped that this year might be different though, especially with his family coming to visit. He thought that because Eiri was actually out of his study when he’d returned from shopping that he had finally decided to do away with his seasonal humbuggery and actually have a happy Christmas; However it was apparent to Shu now that he had been way off in making this assumption.

Shuichi’s hands, balled tightly into fists, slammed down onto the leather sofa in frustration; a few of his tears cascading down onto the black leather at the same time. He had ascertained a suitable level of certainty in his relationship with Yuki and it gave him courage enough to ask questions he had once been afraid to ask for fear of being discarded. His courage was going to help him get to the bottom of whatever was eating away at his lover’s holiday spirit and upsetting him so much. He’d taken as much of Eiri’s attitude as he could stand.

This year is going to be different, he decided.

Shuichi sat up and gently wiped his eyes with the backs of his fingers, careful not to disturb his eye makeup too much. Sliding off the couch, he went to go and confront his lover head on. He made his way in a determined march to the end of the hall and just as he was about to bang on the door and demand entry he heard Eiri’s cell phone ring. The singer knew better than to interrupt his lover when he was on the phone so, nosily, he pressed his ear to the door to try and make out who he was talking to instead.

“What do you want, Seguchi?”

So he was talking to Tohma again.

He was silent for some time, and Shuichi heard him gasp. “What? Is she going to be alright?…Tohma, If there’s anything I… of course I’m going to come down! What kind of brother do you think I am?…hold on we’ll be there as soon as we can.”

“Brat!” Eiri yelled loudly.

Shuichi opened the door and stuck his head in.

“What? What’s going on?”

Eiri didn’t pause to give a response, he was already headed for the front hallway.

“Get your coat on and call a cab, we’ve got to get down to the hospital.”

“Why? What’s happened?”

“Do what I told you, I’ll explain on the way there.”

“But Eiri, what--”

“Just do what I told you, Shuichi!” Eiri snapped angrily. He was clearly upset and his patience had already been worn thin before he’d gotten the call from Tohma. The singer decided it was not a good idea to prod his lover for any more details and did what he had been told to do. Eiri had never used his name in anger before, Mika must have been seriously hurt for him to react in such a violent manner. Whatever had happened, he hoped she would be alright.

~~~~~

“Hmm…I wonder where Ryu could be?” Tatsuha thought aloud in a sing song voice. The monk was currently playing an involuntary game of hide and seek and he was rather eager to find his lover’s hiding place so he could punish him for running off and hiding.

He paused and listened. He was hoping Ryu would laugh or make some sort of noise that would betray his location if he knew he was getting close to him, but his plan failed. He could hear nothing except the fan on the large electric heater they had going in the living room. He paced a few steps forward and knocked a stack of magazines off the kotatsu table on purpose, again hoping to get his lover to make some sort of sound.

He listened intently and got the result he had been hoping for; A small shuffling noise in the bedroom.

Tatsuha crept silently down the darkened hallway toward the bedroom door. Carefully he slid it open and stepped inside.

“I wonder if he could be in the bedroom?”

He tiptoed further into the dark room, making his way to the large closet on the far wall where he was fairly certain Ryuichi was hiding.

Just as he was about to open the door a pair of arms slipped around his chest. He jumped, startled by how silent his attacker had been in his approach.

“Caught you.” Ryu whispered softly.

“What a cheater. I believe I was supposed to be finding you, not the other way around.”

Ryu smiled and started kissing Tatsuha’s neck slowly, making the young man shiver.

“My house, my rules. Now turn around so I can claim my prize.”

Tatsuha did as he was instructed, but when Ryu went to kiss him he used his superior upper body strength to lift the smaller man off the ground. He discovered immediately what the singer had in mind for a reward, as he was already completely naked.

“Nooo, put me down, Ta-kun!” Ryu giggled as he squirmed to get loose. “What about my prize you meanie?”

“Hush! I’ve got something else for you. It’s over here on the bed.”

“Oh, and what might that be?” Ryu growled as he leaned in to capture a kiss.

Distracted, Tatsuha bumped into the bed blindly with his legs and nonchalantly dumped Ryu onto it before falling over dramatically beside him.

Once the younger man was down Ryuichi quickly leapt, cat like, on top of him and pinned him to the bed. Tatsuha was actually surprised at the amount of strength his lover could exercise when given the motivation.

“So, what exactly do you have for me, Tatsuha?” The singer asked. Not waiting for a reply, he leaned down and licked a long line up the monks neck to his ear as his hands slowly began to unbutton his navy blue shirt. “It better be something good, I think I deserve it, don’t you?”

Soft, lithe fingers ran gracefully over Tatsuha’s bare chest and sides as a hot, wet mouth clamped down over his throat. Panting, the dark haired young man struggled to respond. “I…I…ahh, oh…It’s down…down, ahn…”

“Down where?” Ryu enquired, putting a hand to his ear as though he couldn’t hear what his lover was saying. “Down here?” He placed a hand firmly over Tatsuha’s growing erection making the boy moan loudly and buck against him.

“Oh, so this is what you have for me is it? Hmm, it feels very nice, but I’m not sure if I want it or not. Why don’t you tell me? Do I want it or…maybe you want something from me?” The singer ground his hips firmly against Tatsuha’s groin.

The young man could barely think straight. What Ryu was doing to him with his hands and his mouth and his body was creating a blissful, searing, agony inside his veins that made it impossible to do anything but lie there and pant. The singer knew exactly where to touch him to make his brain melt into goo and his body quiver with longing.

Earlier, he had wanted to give Ryu a good hard fucking for hiding on him, but the firm, warm, weight of the singer pinning him to the bed; his hands and mouth teasing his body into submission, paired with his domineering attitude were bringing out the masochist in him at an alarming rate. All of a sudden he wanted it, and he wanted it bad.

Unlike his brother, with whom he apparently shared a great deal of similarities, he was the younger partner in his relationship; the much younger partner in fact, and while he did share a bit of his brothers dominant streak he didn’t feel the need to consistently be the assertive partner and he certainly held no qualms about being on the bottom more often than he was on top, something he was certain Eiri would not tolerate. The humorous image of his brother, all six foot and one blonde inch of him, bent over on all fours for that little pink haired runt he called a lover momentarily distracted Tatsuha from his current sexual torment. He could see it in his head, he knew it must happen, and yet it still made him want to burst out laughing just thinking about it, regardless of whether he was one to talk or not.

In his case, it was completely the opposite. While Ryuichi was often times the less mature of the two, in situations like these Tatsuha enjoyed his lovers age and experience, as well as submitting to him whenever he wanted him too. Ryu was usually very good at giving him a choice in the matter and Tatsuha quite often chose to let his lover have his way with him; not to be placating, but because sometimes it was nice to simply be loved exquisitely and thoroughly by someone else and not have to deal with the stress of being the one in control. Besides, the sex was always amazing regardless of who was doing what to who.

“So? What’ll it be, Ta-kun? I’m…” The singer slid back and pressed his bare ass against Tatsuha’s cloth covered cock, “…waiting.”

Before Tatsuha could answer, his cell phone started to vibrate on the bedside table.

When Ryu saw his lover’s eyes gravitating to his phone he placed a hand on his face and directed it back towards him. “Leave it, we’re busy.” he commanded and leaned down to kiss the dark haired youth again, swirling his tongue vigorously inside his mouth.

“Now,” Ryu purred seductively, “answer me! What do you want?”

“I want…I want you to…ah…”

“You want me to--” The singer leaned in closely to Tatsuha’s ear and started to nip at it,“--fuck you?” he whispered salaciously.

The boy groaned and trembled deliciously as he felt Ryu’s hot breath behind his ear. He nodded slowly and Ryu gave a wry smile that his lover couldn’t see.

“Perfect, but I want to hear you say it. I want you to beg me to fuck you.”

Tatsuha hesitated longer than he should have, making Ryu increase the strength of his grip on the young man’s hardened anatomy.

“Ahh! O-okay! God Ryu, please, ahh…I’m begging you, just fuck me.”

“Mmm, good boy,” Ryuichi moaned passionately; His mouth diving down to kiss his lover franticly as his hands ran wildly through Tatsuha’s silky black hair.

“Now lose the boxers.” Ryu panted softly, his hands delving down to aid Tatsuha in this task while his mouth remained firmly locked over his lovers; not that the young monk needed much help to begin with. The offending garment was off in a flash.

Once his partner was properly nude, Ryu swung his leg over Tatsuha’s side to get off him then afterward leaned down to give his lover a gentle kiss on his chest accompanied by a smouldering gaze.

“Stay.” he commanded and then crawled over to the other side of the bed to retrieve the tube of sex gel out of it’s place in the bed side table.

At this moment Tatsuha’s phone started to vibrate again. Ryu glared down at it maliciously, but before he pushed it into the drawer where it would stop disturbing them he glanced at and recognized the number on the call display; it was Tohma’s personal cell phone.

Without thinking he opened it and answered, “Tohma! Stop calling Ta-kun so much, he can’t talk to you he’s busy busy!”

Tatsuha was a bit surprised to learn that his brother in law was the one who had been trying to reach him at such a late hour. He sat up and tried to take the phone from Ryu but the singer flicked an eerie glare at him and mouthed the words “No! Stay!”.

Ryu listened quietly to the phone for a little bit, making annoyed faces as Tohma begged him to give the phone to Tatsuha.

“Alright,” he groaned, “But this better not take all night, Tohma. I’ve got things to do to him.”

Tatsuha took the proffered cell phone out of Ryu’s hand and the singer flopped back on the bed pouting, arms crossed over his chest.

“Uh, hello S-Seguchi-san.” Tatsuha stuttered bashfully. “Sorry about him he’s just upset because, umm that is, we were just--”

“That’s quite alright Tatsuha-kun, I know what he’s like when he gets interrupted--” Tatsuha tried not to dwell on what Tohma meant by that because it honestly weirded him out to think about the man having been with his brother, his own lover and his sister. It was creepy.

“--Now to the point, I’m calling because Mika has been admitted to Tokyo General and is undergoing emergency surgery. I--”

“What?! Why what’s happened?”

Tohma was silent, but Tatsuha could hear his breathing start to become erratic as he tried not to cry.

“It’s all my fault!” he uncharacteristically burst into tears, “I should have took her hand and helped her down those steps even though she pushed me away. I know she’s strong but--”

“She fell down the stairs? Where? Outside? Inside? How many?”

Ryu sat up, sensing now the urgency of the call and feeling horrible for delaying it like he had.

“We were just leaving the Christmas party for Highwave Records and she insisted that ‘being pregnant didn’t make her an invalid’ and pushed me off her arm when I went to assist her down the steps. That ice storm we had a few days ago, well the steps were still slick and she…she fell. How far is irrelevant, however she haemorrhaged and went into shock. S-she’s in surgery right now. They’re doing what they can for her and for the baby, but…but, I…Oh! Eiri!”

Apparently his brother had arrived at the hospital, because the phone call became muffled and all Tatsuha could hear was Tohma crying, presumably into Eiri’s chest. He didn’t blame him for it nor did he hold it against him, because he was tearing up as well. He didn’t know anything about his sisters condition, she could be dying and he had almost ignored the call just so he could have sex.

All he managed to make out of Tohma’s distant, muffled wailing was, “…was so tiny…last ultrasound…The doctors…Eiri…he’s too small…”

Then his brother was on the line.

“Get down here.” Was all Eiri said into the phone before shutting it and putting it back in Seguchi’s pocket.

He had Shuichi help him and Tohma over to a bench where they could sit and wait. Tohma bent over his knees and shook as he cried.

Shuichi gave Eiri a doleful look, and then at once had a hand on Tohma’s back and another on his knee, consoling him in a half hug. Even though he wasn’t exactly best friends with his boss, he was an extremely compassionate human being and the person beside him was hurting deeply so he did what he could.

Eiri on the other hand was a bit more reserved. He was incredibly anxious and frightened; for Tohma, for his sister and for their child, but he wasn’t going to sit in the waiting room and cry over it; Not until he was given a reason to do so and even then he wasn’t sure how he would react. He didn’t want to think about it and so tried everything in his power to pretend he was somewhere else, anywhere else. Despite the uncomfortable death grip Tohma had on his hand, he did not let go or try to pull his hand away. Tohma had been there for him while he cried more times than he cared to remember and he felt it only necessary to return the favour; More so than that, he wanted to hold his hand. After all he still cared for Tohma, even loved him to a certain degree and perhaps, though he wouldn’t admit it, he really needed a hand to hold onto too.

They didn’t know anything yet and they probably wouldn’t know anything for a while, and so they sat, united in their anguish. At one time animosity ran rampant between the three of them, their bizarre love triangle dividing them in the worst ways possible, but in that moment none of it seemed to matter. The unspoken knowledge and acceptance that each of them needed something in that moment was enough to put the past aside. And so, together, they waited.

For good news. For bad news. For the worst news imaginable.

All they could do was wait.

~*~*~*~*~

AN: Wow. Hello! God I read when I had last updated this story and I just about flipped. March of LAST YEAR? What in the world I didn‘t think it had been THAT long?! A lot has happened this last little while, I started University last fall, and the process of applying and putting together money and things began in March of last year along with the arrival of Yuki my 9 week old Chinese Crested puppy, who just turned 1 year old yesterday on the 12th . His registered name is “Pixietail Strawberry Snowcake” a name which my brother actually suggested to me off hand one night in the car while I was in turmoil over which name to choose for my puppy and I absolutely adored it. Pixietail being his breeders kennel and Strawberry Snowcake being a combination of Yuki’s name meaning snow and his favourite food.

And things have just been a whorl-wind of craziness with that, as well as school and working on my other story and my most recent one-shot and just doing everything gaaah…I must confess I had the first half of this written for some time and, because things are very much nearing the end for this story I have been having a bit of a hard time dealing with that, how to write it, what to write, how I really want things to wrap up. I know it’s just a story and I know it should be coming to an end after this many years, but it’s been a part of my day to day life for so long, taking up so many of my thoughts that I really just have this feeling of loss when I imagine the ending approaching so quickly, perhaps in as few as two chapters. I have not fully decided yet and of course the muse will always have it’s way with me and my deadlines first so realistically I have no clue when it will actually be 100% officially done. Of course then I must go through the process I started a while back and re-write a lot of the chapters, proof them and what not and start putting them up on AFF.net which I guess will give it a second life. I do have my AU fic that has been stealing a LOT of time and energy from this story, and I apologize for that. I think in the year since I started that one I wrote 6 chapters and only one of this story and that isn’t right. It should be equal and it’s not. Anyway, I do have plans for a sequel to this fic, though the details of it have to be researched and planned out a mite bit better than this story so hopefully I will be able to get the chapters out to you at a much faster rate. I couldn’t ever really let my Yuki, my Ryu, my versions of the characters be set aside for too long, they are too much a part of me for that to happen they’d quite literally have my head and I couldn’t not write about them if I tried.

Oh my this AN is really long. Heh heh I apologize for that as well -_-;

For gurabite reviewers:

bakayarona: Thank you very much my friend!

Lawless: Welcome! And I have to say I am very happy to have you reading in particular. Is it okay to gush in a response to a review? Because I have to say I adored “Exposure” I laughed, I cried, I squealed with joy. Your writing was perfect, I loved your use of imagery and your dialogue in particular was just captivating. Ha ha, yes… Anyways I thank you for your review and I do hope you continue to stick around, for however long this takes to wrap up.

Eiri-Chick: Thank you so much darling! Lol to be honest that line actually made me laugh as well when I was writing it and I thought “This might not be so much in character as I would like, but if it makes me laugh I guarantee it will make somebody else do the same, so I’m leaving it in!” it appears I was right! ^_~

For Mediaminer reviewers:

Shadowfox_13: I am so glad you are enjoying the story so much! And I am very glad you decided to leave such a wonderful, thoughtful review for me it was really nice to see.

Tohma does have issues, yes a great deal of them in my opinion. I think he needs to see a therapist. As for the other two questions, about his love for Mika and for their children I will have to let you see for yourself what happens there ^_~! Yes that was my take on Ryu and Tatsuha being together and I see I did manage to get that through in the story a bit like I had intended. He is taken care of, handled with kid gloves and mothered over by pretty much everyone, Tohma in particular is very bad with this, and so I think having a younger partner is just what he needs to remain stable and happy. And as for the Aizawa incident in regards to Shuichi’s mind, I honestly agree with you there. That would have left some sort of mark behind I am sure of it, however in the anime and especially in the manga nothing much is mentioned of it and since my aim with this story was not to explore that potential side to Shuichi, I just left it alone because I felt delving into something of that magnitude really does require the dedication of it’s own story, rather than as a weak subplot in an already very full story like this one. I hope you sit back and stay a while for the rest of the story, however long it winds up being in the end. I look forward to your feedback it was truly a treat to read and think about!