Gravitation Fan Fiction ❯ Crossroads ❯ Crisis ( Chapter 5 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: shuichi77 
Anime/Manga: Gravitation Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 01.28.2013 | Pages: 3 | Words: 3.4K | Visits: 141 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Gravitation Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 01.28.2013 | Pages: 3 | Words: 3.4K | Visits: 141 | Status: Work In Progress
“W-what…”
Shuichi’s mind was now in a complete panic and his chest felt so tight that he could barely draw a breath. The blonde then released his grip on the captive singer, letting him fall to the floor, before silently lighting a cigarette. As soon as Shuichi hit the floor, he scrambled to grab his shorts and slid them on as fast as he could.
“You heard me brat.” Yuki was now comfortably relaxed into the large sofa with the smaller boy now on his knees at his feet with large tears in his eyes.
“B-but Yuki…why? Why are you doing this to me? I thought-“
“You thought what?” The blonde’s voice had now returned to its usual cold icy tone.
“I thought that…you loved me…I thought that you wanted me…” Shuichi was now feeling ultimately defeated. He felt used, deceived and guilty; and the worst part was that he actually thought that Yuki had changed.
“I do want you.”
“Then why are you doing this Yuki?” The blonde then let out a low aggravated growl.
“You really are dense. I’m doing this because I want you; but I am different from that childish boy toy of yours. If I want something, I take it and I’ll do whatever it takes to keep it. I lost you once already and I am not going to let you go again.”
Shuichi’s eye’s quickly grew wide with a mixture of confusion and fear; he knew that the blonde was serious and that meant nothing but bad news. At that point Shuichi knew that there was now nothing that he could do, at least for time being. So he remained right where he was on his knees on the hard floor and simply lowered his head in defeat.
“Ok Yuki…I’ll do whatever you say.”
“Smart choice.” Yuki then gave the singer a small pat on the head before standing from the couch and walking over to where the boy’s shirt lay on the floor. He smoothly picked it up and threw it at his new pet. “Now get dressed and get going; I have a deadline to meet.”
“Ok.” Shuichi then slowly stood and slipped on his shirt as he was told, sill feeling miserable about himself and the horrible situation he had gotten himself into. Once dressed he made his way silently toward the cool blonde that was standing in the entry way holding the front door open for him. Before Shuichi could make his exit however, Yuki grabbed gently onto his arm and turned him around.
“Give me your phone.” The singer did as he was told and silently handed over his phone to the blonde. Yuki then typed a few numbers into the phone and then hit the green button to dial. He then handed the small phone back to the boy. “That is my private number, feel free to contact me whenever you please; and now I have your number as well so you can expect to hear from me too.”
“Ok Yuki.” The blonde then gently pulled the boy in for one last tender kiss before releasing his arm and allowing him to leave, even more conflicted and confused then when he first arrived.
Once he was finally allowed to leave, Shuichi began his long solemn walk to the studio knowing that he had to talk to Hiro about his ordeal. As Shuichi walked, his demeanor was similar to that of a dog that had just been scolded and sent out onto the streets. He shoulders were slumped over and he kept his head held low and eyes fixated on the ground, not really caring much to watch where he was going. All the while through his walk his mind was once again a mess of mixed thoughts and emotions.
‘Aiya…What am I going to do? What is that man’s problem anyway? He comes at me all sweet and nice and actually made me miss him…then he turns right back into the same old ass hole. This really is a mess….’
“Ow!”
Shuichi was snapped out of his confusing thoughts by the painful sensation of running head first into the large building that housed the recording studio. He had become so lost in his own head that he didn’t even realize that he had already arrived at the studio, or more accurately, arrived into it. He let out a long sigh and quickly gave the new knot on his forehead a rub before heading into the tall glass building. As he walked through the lobby toward the elevator he did his best to put on his normal smiling face so as not to cause any unwanted attention. Once he made it safely into the elevator he could finally let his mask fall and let out another long sigh in preparation for the long talk he was going to need to have with Hiro. After a short moment there was a small ding and the elevator doors slid open. Shuichi slowly made his way toward Bad Luck’s studio and break room. Upon arriving at the door of the break room, Shuichi took one last deep breathe before entering. He was a little relieved to see that Hiro was alone in the small room, sitting in a chair with his legs propped up on the table and a candy stick protruding from his mouth. The red head heard the door squeak open and promptly turned his head around to see a very blank faced pink haired singer.
“So, the conquering hero returns.” Shuichi completely ignored this comment and instead just walked over to the seat next to Hiro and plopped himself down into it. The red head then pulled his legs off of the table to set them firmly on the ground and turned around to the side to face Shuichi.
“So…how did it go?” Hiro got his answer when the pink haired boy burst into tears and sobs.
“I-I m-messed up H-Hiro.”
“What do you mean? If you killed him or something, I’m not helping you bury the body.” Hiro’s comment immediately caused his friend to cry even more uncontrollably and he knew that it was serious; so he made a quick shift back into serious best friend mode.
“Alright, alright. Stop the water works and just tell me what happened.” Shuichi took a moment to try and calm his tears and collect his thoughts before speaking.
“Well I went to Yuki’s house yesterday to try and talk to him and I found out that he now lives on the same street as my parents.”
“Hmm…That’s definitely odd but did you get to talk to him?”
“Kind of. When I got to his house and he opened the door, he didn’t actually say anything; he just pulled me inside and he… kissed me. So I just panicked and pushed him off then ran home.”
“Is that it?”
“No….” Shuichi then averted his gaze straight down to his feet as he shuffled them about, trying to figure out how he was going to go about telling the rest of the story.
“Well…?”
“Well I decided to go back over to his house this morning to try and actually talk to him.”
“Ok and how did that go?”
“Well today when I got there he seemed really pissed off and it looked like he hadn’t slept all night. I told him that I needed to talk to him and he let me in and say what I had to say.”
“Did he have anything to say? Did he tell you why he abandoned you?”
“He said…he said that he left that day because he was afraid.” Hiro quickly gained a slightly shocked expression at this idea.
“Really? The great Eiri Yuki afraid? Afraid of what?” Shuichi then finally looked up from his daze on the floor to look at Hiro with small tears still running down his red cheeks.
“He told me that the night he left, he had written a song for me and that he realized that he was actually in love with me. Then he said that he was too afraid to love someone again after everything that happened with Yuki Kitazawa…so he left.”
“Well that is definitely not what I expected, but then why did he come back?”
“He said that he came back because he is still in love with me.” Hiro was then silent for a moment to let all this new information sink in fully.
“Well…I’m sure that was all very hard and confusing for you, but do you at least feel like you got some closure?”
“N-no…” Shuichi then began again with the sobs and big heavy tears. As his best friend withered into a crying mess in front of him, Hiro suddenly noticed the couple of small red marks along Shuichi’s neck. The red head then let out a long sigh as he reached one of his hands over to trace the marks along Shuichi’s neck.
“You didn’t really do what I think you did, did you?” Shuichi quickly noticed what Hiro was referring to and could only give his head a small nod through his sobs and short gasping breaths. Hiro then let out another long sigh as he rested his forehead into one of his hands in a mixture of disappointment and frustration.
“Shuichi….how could you do that?”
“I-I didn’t mean to. I tried to stop it but….I don’t know what happened. I just…couldn’t help it. He was crying and he was saying such sweet things about me and next thing I knew we were-“
“Just stop, I don’t need to know the details.”
“Ok…I just don’t know what to do.” There was then a small silence between to the two as they were both at a loss for words.
“Shuichi….you have to tell Ryuichi.” Shuichi then quickly started becoming hysterical once again.
“No! I can’t! I can’t! I don’t want to lose him, I love him…”
“Well you really should…but if you aren’t going to then your only other option is to stop seeing Yuki. Don’t talk to him or see him anymore.”
“I can’t do that either….” Hiro was now beginning to get very frustrated with his friend.
“Why the hell not?”
“Because…Yuki said if I don’t do what he says from now on then he will tell Ryuichi everything.”
“So he is blackmailing you?!” Shuichi was finally started to run out of tears and was now just sniffling in between small sobs.
“Yeah…”
“Aiya Shuichi….you have really gotten yourself into a mess this time.”
“I know….” Hiro then suddenly stood from his chair and placed a small gentle pat on the top of Shuichi’s head.
“Well I’m not exactly pleased with this situation….but as your best friend it’s my responsibility to do what I can to help you.” Shuichi then looked up to the red head with big red puffy eyes and pathetic yet appreciative look on his face.
“Really?”
“Of course dummy. So first things first, we need to get those hickies covered up. I’ll go get one of the girls from make-up to come and see what she can do.” Small tears then again began to roll down the singers cheeks; he felt so lucky to have a friend like Hiro that was willing to help him even though he had messed up so badly.
“Thank you Hiro.”
“Don’t mention it. Oh, what happened to your forehead by the way?” Shuichi was confused for a moment until he reached up to his forehead and felt the small bandage there; he almost forgot all about it.
“Oh, I just fell. I’m ok.”
“Alright. Well wait here and I’ll go get the new girl from make-up. She just started this week so she doesn’t know anything about you, Ryuichi or Yuki, so there is no chance she would blow your cover.”
“Ok.”
Hiro then made a quick exit from the small break room and headed to the next room over to retrieve the make-up artist. It was only a short moment before Hiro reentered the room with a small blonde girl close in toe. They both made their way over to where the depressed singer was slouched over in his chair.
“Shuichi, lift up your head so she can see your neck.” Shuichi silently complied and the girl took a good look at the three small dark red marks on his neck.
“Yeah, I can cover these no problem Mr. Shindou.”
The girl looked down at Shuichi with a comforting smile before setting down her large make-up bag on the table. Hiro watched on as she pulled out a small bottle and a sponge and quickly began splotching make-up onto the marks, while Shuichi just sat still and silent with a completely blank look on his face. It only took about five minutes before the girl was packing her things back into her bag.
“All done. What do you think?” She then handed Shuichi a small hand mirror and he investigated his reflection very thoroughly.
“Wow, that’s really impressive, I can’t see a thing.” The small girl then gave a large proud grin.
“Thank you Mr. Shindou.” She then picked up her bag and made her way happily out of the room, leaving the two boys alone once again.
“Ok, now that we have that taken care of, what are you going to do about this mess you’ve gotten yourself into?”
“I don’t really know.” Hiro then plopped himself down back into the chair next the singer and inserted another stick of candy into his mouth.
“Well it looks like you don’t really have a whole lot of options with what you have to work with. So, I suppose the best thing you can do is just try talking to Yuki. Try appealing to his compassion, if he has any.”
“But what if that doesn’t work?”
“Well this is a sensitive situation so you need to at least try, and if it doesn’t work then we will figure something else out then. As of now it’s best just to try and take this one delicate step at a time.”
“Ok Hiro…I’ll try it.”
“Good. Now, you have had a long day so go ahead and take the rest of the day off and go home and try and get some rest.”
“Are you sure?”
“No but you are no use to the band in this condition so you might as well just go home for the day. Suguru and I are pretty much done for the day anyway; we are just doing some editing.”
“Ok then….”
“But can you do me a favor Shuichi?”
“What is it?”
“Please try not to forget that we have an album release in less than two months now and you have yet to write anything. So we really need you to start actually coming to work and get some lyrics written.” Shuichi was finally beginning to get a small amount of his confidence and determination back and he jolted up from his chair to give Hiro a big thumbs up.
“Don’t worry Hiro, I promise I will get all the lyrics written. I won’t let Bad Luck fail and I won’t let you down.”
“Good, now go on and get out of here.”
“OK.” Shuichi then made his way toward the door but stopped just short of it and turned his head around to look back at his friend with a very serious expression. “Thank you Hiro….for everything.”
“I said don’t mention it. After all, that’s what friends are for.” The singer then gave a small grin and exited the room.
Shuichi’s walk home seemed painfully long and each step seemed impossibly difficult. His mind and body were completely weighed down with the fear and guilt of going home. He had no idea how he was going to be able to face his bubbly brunette lover that he had so terribly betrayed. He felt truly lost and worthless but he knew that he had to do his best to try and fix this situation; his whole life with Ryuichi depended on it. Once he finally arrived home, he let out a long deep breathe and made his way cautiously through the front door. He was slightly surprised to find that he had in fact not been tackled as he normally was and that all of the lights were off. He flipped on a light switch and gave the entire apartment a once over before discovering that Ryuichi wasn’t there. He then let out a small sigh of relief and figured that Ryuichi was still at the studio. Shuichi’s whole body started to feel a little lighter knowing that facing his lover was now put off, at least until later.
The singer was completely drained emotionally and physically from his day, so much so that he wasn’t even hungry. All he wanted to do was shower and sleep. In fact, nothing sounded better to Shuichi then a hot shower to wash away everything from the day. So he wobbled his way into the master bedroom, shedding off layers of clothes all the way, until he reached the large lavish bathroom. By the time he made it over to the shower he was only in his small shorts. Before reaching in to get the water started, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and quickly remembered about the make-up covering his neck. He then slumped over in a deep depression now knowing that he couldn’t even take a shower, fearing that it would wash away the make-up. He could then only let out a small sigh as he made his way back into the bedroom and riffled through the drawers to find a small blue tank top to sleep in. Shuichi then climbed his way rather pathetically into the large California king bed and pulled the blanket all the way over his head. The singer then struggled to find comfort in any position on the bed; he had become so used to sleeping with a warm body next to him that he now found it difficult to sleep without Ryuichi. After a few minutes of tossing and turning Shuichi grabbed ahold of the pillow that Ryuichi always slept on and was finally able to find comfort in the lingering smell of the man he loved. Only then was he able to drift away to sleep with a few small tears in his eyes and only one thought on his mind.
‘I’m sorry Ryuichi….’
Shuichi’s mind was now in a complete panic and his chest felt so tight that he could barely draw a breath. The blonde then released his grip on the captive singer, letting him fall to the floor, before silently lighting a cigarette. As soon as Shuichi hit the floor, he scrambled to grab his shorts and slid them on as fast as he could.
“You heard me brat.” Yuki was now comfortably relaxed into the large sofa with the smaller boy now on his knees at his feet with large tears in his eyes.
“B-but Yuki…why? Why are you doing this to me? I thought-“
“You thought what?” The blonde’s voice had now returned to its usual cold icy tone.
“I thought that…you loved me…I thought that you wanted me…” Shuichi was now feeling ultimately defeated. He felt used, deceived and guilty; and the worst part was that he actually thought that Yuki had changed.
“I do want you.”
“Then why are you doing this Yuki?” The blonde then let out a low aggravated growl.
“You really are dense. I’m doing this because I want you; but I am different from that childish boy toy of yours. If I want something, I take it and I’ll do whatever it takes to keep it. I lost you once already and I am not going to let you go again.”
Shuichi’s eye’s quickly grew wide with a mixture of confusion and fear; he knew that the blonde was serious and that meant nothing but bad news. At that point Shuichi knew that there was now nothing that he could do, at least for time being. So he remained right where he was on his knees on the hard floor and simply lowered his head in defeat.
“Ok Yuki…I’ll do whatever you say.”
“Smart choice.” Yuki then gave the singer a small pat on the head before standing from the couch and walking over to where the boy’s shirt lay on the floor. He smoothly picked it up and threw it at his new pet. “Now get dressed and get going; I have a deadline to meet.”
“Ok.” Shuichi then slowly stood and slipped on his shirt as he was told, sill feeling miserable about himself and the horrible situation he had gotten himself into. Once dressed he made his way silently toward the cool blonde that was standing in the entry way holding the front door open for him. Before Shuichi could make his exit however, Yuki grabbed gently onto his arm and turned him around.
“Give me your phone.” The singer did as he was told and silently handed over his phone to the blonde. Yuki then typed a few numbers into the phone and then hit the green button to dial. He then handed the small phone back to the boy. “That is my private number, feel free to contact me whenever you please; and now I have your number as well so you can expect to hear from me too.”
“Ok Yuki.” The blonde then gently pulled the boy in for one last tender kiss before releasing his arm and allowing him to leave, even more conflicted and confused then when he first arrived.
Once he was finally allowed to leave, Shuichi began his long solemn walk to the studio knowing that he had to talk to Hiro about his ordeal. As Shuichi walked, his demeanor was similar to that of a dog that had just been scolded and sent out onto the streets. He shoulders were slumped over and he kept his head held low and eyes fixated on the ground, not really caring much to watch where he was going. All the while through his walk his mind was once again a mess of mixed thoughts and emotions.
‘Aiya…What am I going to do? What is that man’s problem anyway? He comes at me all sweet and nice and actually made me miss him…then he turns right back into the same old ass hole. This really is a mess….’
“Ow!”
Shuichi was snapped out of his confusing thoughts by the painful sensation of running head first into the large building that housed the recording studio. He had become so lost in his own head that he didn’t even realize that he had already arrived at the studio, or more accurately, arrived into it. He let out a long sigh and quickly gave the new knot on his forehead a rub before heading into the tall glass building. As he walked through the lobby toward the elevator he did his best to put on his normal smiling face so as not to cause any unwanted attention. Once he made it safely into the elevator he could finally let his mask fall and let out another long sigh in preparation for the long talk he was going to need to have with Hiro. After a short moment there was a small ding and the elevator doors slid open. Shuichi slowly made his way toward Bad Luck’s studio and break room. Upon arriving at the door of the break room, Shuichi took one last deep breathe before entering. He was a little relieved to see that Hiro was alone in the small room, sitting in a chair with his legs propped up on the table and a candy stick protruding from his mouth. The red head heard the door squeak open and promptly turned his head around to see a very blank faced pink haired singer.
“So, the conquering hero returns.” Shuichi completely ignored this comment and instead just walked over to the seat next to Hiro and plopped himself down into it. The red head then pulled his legs off of the table to set them firmly on the ground and turned around to the side to face Shuichi.
“So…how did it go?” Hiro got his answer when the pink haired boy burst into tears and sobs.
“I-I m-messed up H-Hiro.”
“What do you mean? If you killed him or something, I’m not helping you bury the body.” Hiro’s comment immediately caused his friend to cry even more uncontrollably and he knew that it was serious; so he made a quick shift back into serious best friend mode.
“Alright, alright. Stop the water works and just tell me what happened.” Shuichi took a moment to try and calm his tears and collect his thoughts before speaking.
“Well I went to Yuki’s house yesterday to try and talk to him and I found out that he now lives on the same street as my parents.”
“Hmm…That’s definitely odd but did you get to talk to him?”
“Kind of. When I got to his house and he opened the door, he didn’t actually say anything; he just pulled me inside and he… kissed me. So I just panicked and pushed him off then ran home.”
“Is that it?”
“No….” Shuichi then averted his gaze straight down to his feet as he shuffled them about, trying to figure out how he was going to go about telling the rest of the story.
“Well…?”
“Well I decided to go back over to his house this morning to try and actually talk to him.”
“Ok and how did that go?”
“Well today when I got there he seemed really pissed off and it looked like he hadn’t slept all night. I told him that I needed to talk to him and he let me in and say what I had to say.”
“Did he have anything to say? Did he tell you why he abandoned you?”
“He said…he said that he left that day because he was afraid.” Hiro quickly gained a slightly shocked expression at this idea.
“Really? The great Eiri Yuki afraid? Afraid of what?” Shuichi then finally looked up from his daze on the floor to look at Hiro with small tears still running down his red cheeks.
“He told me that the night he left, he had written a song for me and that he realized that he was actually in love with me. Then he said that he was too afraid to love someone again after everything that happened with Yuki Kitazawa…so he left.”
“Well that is definitely not what I expected, but then why did he come back?”
“He said that he came back because he is still in love with me.” Hiro was then silent for a moment to let all this new information sink in fully.
“Well…I’m sure that was all very hard and confusing for you, but do you at least feel like you got some closure?”
“N-no…” Shuichi then began again with the sobs and big heavy tears. As his best friend withered into a crying mess in front of him, Hiro suddenly noticed the couple of small red marks along Shuichi’s neck. The red head then let out a long sigh as he reached one of his hands over to trace the marks along Shuichi’s neck.
“You didn’t really do what I think you did, did you?” Shuichi quickly noticed what Hiro was referring to and could only give his head a small nod through his sobs and short gasping breaths. Hiro then let out another long sigh as he rested his forehead into one of his hands in a mixture of disappointment and frustration.
“Shuichi….how could you do that?”
“I-I didn’t mean to. I tried to stop it but….I don’t know what happened. I just…couldn’t help it. He was crying and he was saying such sweet things about me and next thing I knew we were-“
“Just stop, I don’t need to know the details.”
“Ok…I just don’t know what to do.” There was then a small silence between to the two as they were both at a loss for words.
“Shuichi….you have to tell Ryuichi.” Shuichi then quickly started becoming hysterical once again.
“No! I can’t! I can’t! I don’t want to lose him, I love him…”
“Well you really should…but if you aren’t going to then your only other option is to stop seeing Yuki. Don’t talk to him or see him anymore.”
“I can’t do that either….” Hiro was now beginning to get very frustrated with his friend.
“Why the hell not?”
“Because…Yuki said if I don’t do what he says from now on then he will tell Ryuichi everything.”
“So he is blackmailing you?!” Shuichi was finally started to run out of tears and was now just sniffling in between small sobs.
“Yeah…”
“Aiya Shuichi….you have really gotten yourself into a mess this time.”
“I know….” Hiro then suddenly stood from his chair and placed a small gentle pat on the top of Shuichi’s head.
“Well I’m not exactly pleased with this situation….but as your best friend it’s my responsibility to do what I can to help you.” Shuichi then looked up to the red head with big red puffy eyes and pathetic yet appreciative look on his face.
“Really?”
“Of course dummy. So first things first, we need to get those hickies covered up. I’ll go get one of the girls from make-up to come and see what she can do.” Small tears then again began to roll down the singers cheeks; he felt so lucky to have a friend like Hiro that was willing to help him even though he had messed up so badly.
“Thank you Hiro.”
“Don’t mention it. Oh, what happened to your forehead by the way?” Shuichi was confused for a moment until he reached up to his forehead and felt the small bandage there; he almost forgot all about it.
“Oh, I just fell. I’m ok.”
“Alright. Well wait here and I’ll go get the new girl from make-up. She just started this week so she doesn’t know anything about you, Ryuichi or Yuki, so there is no chance she would blow your cover.”
“Ok.”
Hiro then made a quick exit from the small break room and headed to the next room over to retrieve the make-up artist. It was only a short moment before Hiro reentered the room with a small blonde girl close in toe. They both made their way over to where the depressed singer was slouched over in his chair.
“Shuichi, lift up your head so she can see your neck.” Shuichi silently complied and the girl took a good look at the three small dark red marks on his neck.
“Yeah, I can cover these no problem Mr. Shindou.”
The girl looked down at Shuichi with a comforting smile before setting down her large make-up bag on the table. Hiro watched on as she pulled out a small bottle and a sponge and quickly began splotching make-up onto the marks, while Shuichi just sat still and silent with a completely blank look on his face. It only took about five minutes before the girl was packing her things back into her bag.
“All done. What do you think?” She then handed Shuichi a small hand mirror and he investigated his reflection very thoroughly.
“Wow, that’s really impressive, I can’t see a thing.” The small girl then gave a large proud grin.
“Thank you Mr. Shindou.” She then picked up her bag and made her way happily out of the room, leaving the two boys alone once again.
“Ok, now that we have that taken care of, what are you going to do about this mess you’ve gotten yourself into?”
“I don’t really know.” Hiro then plopped himself down back into the chair next the singer and inserted another stick of candy into his mouth.
“Well it looks like you don’t really have a whole lot of options with what you have to work with. So, I suppose the best thing you can do is just try talking to Yuki. Try appealing to his compassion, if he has any.”
“But what if that doesn’t work?”
“Well this is a sensitive situation so you need to at least try, and if it doesn’t work then we will figure something else out then. As of now it’s best just to try and take this one delicate step at a time.”
“Ok Hiro…I’ll try it.”
“Good. Now, you have had a long day so go ahead and take the rest of the day off and go home and try and get some rest.”
“Are you sure?”
“No but you are no use to the band in this condition so you might as well just go home for the day. Suguru and I are pretty much done for the day anyway; we are just doing some editing.”
“Ok then….”
“But can you do me a favor Shuichi?”
“What is it?”
“Please try not to forget that we have an album release in less than two months now and you have yet to write anything. So we really need you to start actually coming to work and get some lyrics written.” Shuichi was finally beginning to get a small amount of his confidence and determination back and he jolted up from his chair to give Hiro a big thumbs up.
“Don’t worry Hiro, I promise I will get all the lyrics written. I won’t let Bad Luck fail and I won’t let you down.”
“Good, now go on and get out of here.”
“OK.” Shuichi then made his way toward the door but stopped just short of it and turned his head around to look back at his friend with a very serious expression. “Thank you Hiro….for everything.”
“I said don’t mention it. After all, that’s what friends are for.” The singer then gave a small grin and exited the room.
Shuichi’s walk home seemed painfully long and each step seemed impossibly difficult. His mind and body were completely weighed down with the fear and guilt of going home. He had no idea how he was going to be able to face his bubbly brunette lover that he had so terribly betrayed. He felt truly lost and worthless but he knew that he had to do his best to try and fix this situation; his whole life with Ryuichi depended on it. Once he finally arrived home, he let out a long deep breathe and made his way cautiously through the front door. He was slightly surprised to find that he had in fact not been tackled as he normally was and that all of the lights were off. He flipped on a light switch and gave the entire apartment a once over before discovering that Ryuichi wasn’t there. He then let out a small sigh of relief and figured that Ryuichi was still at the studio. Shuichi’s whole body started to feel a little lighter knowing that facing his lover was now put off, at least until later.
The singer was completely drained emotionally and physically from his day, so much so that he wasn’t even hungry. All he wanted to do was shower and sleep. In fact, nothing sounded better to Shuichi then a hot shower to wash away everything from the day. So he wobbled his way into the master bedroom, shedding off layers of clothes all the way, until he reached the large lavish bathroom. By the time he made it over to the shower he was only in his small shorts. Before reaching in to get the water started, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and quickly remembered about the make-up covering his neck. He then slumped over in a deep depression now knowing that he couldn’t even take a shower, fearing that it would wash away the make-up. He could then only let out a small sigh as he made his way back into the bedroom and riffled through the drawers to find a small blue tank top to sleep in. Shuichi then climbed his way rather pathetically into the large California king bed and pulled the blanket all the way over his head. The singer then struggled to find comfort in any position on the bed; he had become so used to sleeping with a warm body next to him that he now found it difficult to sleep without Ryuichi. After a few minutes of tossing and turning Shuichi grabbed ahold of the pillow that Ryuichi always slept on and was finally able to find comfort in the lingering smell of the man he loved. Only then was he able to drift away to sleep with a few small tears in his eyes and only one thought on his mind.
‘I’m sorry Ryuichi….’