Gravitation Fan Fiction ❯ It Starts With a Question... ❯ Chapter 1

I lay panting in the warm darkness of the bedroom, one arm slung haphazardly across my face as I rode out the last tingling remnants of a mind blowing orgasm. Yuki, as cool and composed as he usually was after sex, smoked his cigarette in silence beside me. One long, elegant leg was bent up; a platform for his arm, off of which he casually flicked his cigarette into the ashtray on the bedside table. His other leg lay flat, tangled in the sheets and serving as a pillow for my head. A nimble, long fingered hand twined mindlessly through the damp pink strands of my hair as we listened to the frantic sound of our hearts beating in unison.

Over and over I watched his face light up in a blaze of orange fire and fade away just as quickly, lost in the maze of smoky-gray tendrils that rose from his mouth and nostrils.

As my mind began to clear the small shreds of doubt and anxiety, ever present at the back of my mind --save for the few blissful moments of contentment following sex-- slowly crept back into their places. I wondered if I was the first person to have lain in such a position next to him. After all the women he's been with, I guess the answer to that is most likely no.

I frowned.

 

What had he seen in them? To have had so many surely there must have been something about them that he liked? Was it the breasts I was born without? The perfectly timed sway of curved hips no man could truly emulate? Or what about… lower things?

 

As he pulled strands of my hair tenderly between his fingers I tried to imagine what he was like with women.

Was he rough with them, like he so often was with me? Did he kiss them the same way? Touch them in the same places? Would he whisper their names over and over right before he came? Had he even known their names?

 

He'd been with so many women before we'd met that it was hard not to wonder what he saw in me, why I was his exception. He'd told me straight out when we'd first met that he didn't date men, so…why me?

I could hardly compare to the tall, gorgeous, well endowed women he'd been with.

I'm like a popsicle stick with a pulse; Very short, flat and bony; what could he possibly like about me?

 

As though he sensed my mental distress over the issue, my golden god looked down from his stoic pedestal.

“You're awfully quiet down there,” he murmured softly as he crushed out what was left of his smoke.

When I didn't even look up at the sound of his voice, much less answer his question, he put a hand on the side of my face.

 

“Ignoring me huh? It's bad form not to congratulate a conductor after he delivers his magnum opus, you know.” He brushed the edge of his thumb across my bottom lip suggestively and gave me a rare smile. His smiles, when they aren't tainted with some smug remark, or rude comment, are breathtaking. It's as though he has a tiny speck of the sun caged inside his body and when he smiles, all that captured light breaks free at once, blinding you with it's brilliance. Being grateful that he was smiling at me helped me overcome the fact that he was right. Again.

 

“Yuki?” I sighed, already afraid of what his response was going to be.

“Ah, so you can speak. How unfortunate, I was just getting used to the silence.”

I looked away, hurt, and he rolled his eyes. Bending at the waist he kissed me upside down and whispered, “You take me way too seriously.”

I smiled, breathing in the glorious scent of his skin as I attempted to enjoy the kiss, but it was no use. The questions were still niggling at the back of my mind and for whatever reason I just couldn't ignore them. I had to know.

In fact, I wanted to know so badly I felt that my curiosity was going to crush me. I really didn't want to make Yuki mad after he'd just shown me what a pleasant mood he was in, and I knew better than anyone that asking him questions which upset him was the quickest way to wind up sleeping on the couch, but I decided to take my chances.

 

“Yuki, can we talk about something?”

He reclined back against the pillows and looked at the clock.

Sighing, he asked, “Will it take long?”

I shook my head as I sat up and tentatively nestled in beside him. When his arm wrapped around my waist I snuggled in closer. “No, not if you don't want it to.”

“Are you going to annoy me, cry and/or burst into song?”

“Uh…not intentionally.”

He shrugged.

“Then I don't see why not. What's on your mind?”

Even though I had the go-ahead, I remained silent. I still wasn't sure how to broach the subject with him in a way that wouldn't violently invade his privacy.

“Well go on, Brat. I don't have to get up in the morning, but I would still like to get to sleep sometime tonight.”

 

I went for it. “I was wondering if we could talk about…women.”

 

“Interesting choice of topic, but I'll bite. What about women?”

 

“Do you ever …miss them?”

He put an arm up behind his head. “Miss them?” he asked, his tone and body position conveying perfect nonchalance.

 

“Yah. Do you miss…you know…”

He laughed at me softly. “Why do you care? I'm with you now, aren't I?”

 

“I care because I don't want you to be, unhappy.”

 

“And who says I'm unhappy?”

 

“Well, nobody. I just thought that there must have been something you liked about being with them, I mean... you dated so many--”

 

“I wouldn't say I `dated' them,” He interrupted quickly, “Unless of course fucking a complete stranger just hours after you've met them counts as a date.”

 

“For arguments sake, let's say yes, that does count as a date. What made you keep dating them?”

Yuki sighed and I could have sworn I caught the tail end of a partially concealed laugh. “Do we really have to use that word? I can't in all honesty say I dated any of those women.”

 

“Well what word would you use then?”

 

“At the risk of sounding crass, I'm going to have to go with fucked; I fucked a lot of women. Dating implies that I ate with them or did something with them in public fully clothed outside of a lounge. I never really did any of those things, or at least never both with the same woman.”

 

“Okay then fine, you fucked a lot of women. Now that we've defined the words in this conversation, will you answer my question?”

 

“I was bored and, to be honest, I was usually pretty lonely most of the time. Happy?”

 

I was a bit taken aback by Yuki's response. I'd expected him to launch into some tangent about breasts or other specific female body parts and treat the whole thing as a joke; But he didn't. He gave me an honest answer and that made me happier than I ever could have anticipated.

 

“Oh, I see.”

 

He smirked. “Not the answer you were expecting was it?”

 

“Actually, no. I mean, I sort of figured that might have been why, but I didn't expect you to just come right out and say it.”

He stretched casually and smirked.

“What can I say, I like to be spontaneous every now and then.”

 

“Did they make you feel better?”

 

He sighed. “If they had of would I be here with you right now?”

 

I hadn't thought of it that way. I smiled. “I guess not.”

 

“Well, there's your answer, idiot.”

 

Several minutes passed as I watched his chest rise and fall with his breath. Gently, I placed a hand over his heart and a few seconds later he placed one of his own over top of it.

 

“Was that all you wanted to talk about?” he asked, his thumb brushing absently across my knuckles.

 

“Actually, I'm kind of c-curious about something else...”

 

Yuki smiled at me again. It was so breathtaking that if I had been standing I would have swooned and fallen over.

“Curious about…?”

I blushed feverishly and avoided his gaze.

“Go ahead and ask your questions, I promise not to laugh.”

 

“Okay fine. W-what does it feel like?”

 

“It feels like having sex with a woman.” he stated matter-of-factly.

 

“Well obviously! You know, for somebody who makes his living writing detailed accounts of people getting it on, that was a horrible description.”

 

Initially he looked so shocked that I figured he was going to throw me out of the room right then and there, but eventually he broke down and nodded at me.

“I suppose you've got a point there Brat; however in my defence it's hard to describe it to someone who's never had sex with anyone of a female persuasion.” He gave me a critical glance. “You haven't have you?”

 

“Eww of course not! I mean…uhh…”

He laughed a little and kissed the top of my head.

 

“Hey you promised not to laugh.”

 

“Sorry, you just sounded like a five year old that's all; afraid of catching cooties and all of that nonsense. It was fairly adorable.”

I pouted, even though I was happy he'd called me adorable.

 

“Don't pout. I'll try to put it into terms you'll understand. It's hot, and moist and not unlike fucking a guy actually, though a lot less gratifying, in my opinion.”

 

“And why do you say that?”

 

He shifted our bodies so that he was hovering over top of me, before leaning down and growling, “Because you are so much tighter.”

He started attacking my neck, biting it and sucking on it as he squeezed my nipple with his left hand. The sensations were intense, especially after just having climaxed. Even though I loved what he was doing, I gently pushed him away.

Was that really the only difference he saw between me and them?

 

“What?” he exhaled heavily, as he looked at me curiously, “I thought you liked it when I--”

 

“I do like it, but…”

“But what?” Tentatively he leaned back down, as though expecting to be pushed away again. When I didn't resist he began laying a trail of kisses from my chin to my temple.

I reached out and put my hand on the side of his face. He leaned into it much the same way a cat leans into you as you pet it, and sighed.

 

“I hate it when you won't shut up, but it's worse when I want you to talk to me and you won't. Tell me what's bothering you.”

 

“It's what you said.”

 

“I can't help it if the sex felt good, I've got no control over that--”

 

“Not that part, the part about me being tight! I don't exactly have a corner on the market in that department and if that's all you care about then what's keeping you from leaving me once you find some weird girl willing to accommodate your…preferences.”

 

He growled in frustration and flicked my forehead.

“I can't believe how stupid you are! Why do you insist on taking everything I say literally? Your ass isn't the only reason I'm with you, you idiot!”

 

“It's…it's not?”

 

Clearly exasperated he cried, “NO!”

 

“Well why are you with me then? I just don't understand what you see in me. I don't have big breasts, I'm not tall, I'm not curvy. I'm just short, bony and flat.”

 

“You know, I think you're right. What am I doing?”

His words hurt so much to begin with, but then I watched him slide his beautiful naked body seductively over top of my own and my hope was restored, at least in part.

His beautiful gold eyes turned upwards to lock onto mine as he gently began exploring my chest with his mouth and hands.

 

“None of these areas are appealing to me at all,” he stated as he ghosted his hands over my thin, pale body. My breath caught in my throat as shiver after shiver danced across my skin.

 

“I hate that your nipples aren't surrounded by breast tissue to dull their sensitivity. Yours are much too responsive for my…tastes.” He began kissing the area around my nipples, causing me to gasp as the sensations ran straight down my spine to areas much lower and hotter.

Gently he bit down on each one in sequence, his moist fingers toying with whichever bud was free of his mouth's punishing embrace.

Mindlessly I writhed under his tongue; his hands; his lips. It felt as though he had been playing with me for hours when he finally released my senses from his intoxicating clutches.

 

“And this--” He declared smugly as he leaned down to draw my mouth into a kiss, “--This soft adorable mouth of yours. Absolutely detestable.”

He kissed me again for emphasis. When he pulled away I could see the hunger in his eyes and the playful smirk on his lips and I realised how foolish I had been to doubt him.

 

Slowly he began to kiss his way down my chest to my abdomen. I convulsed like a fish out of water when I felt his burning hot tongue swirl into my navel.

“Now, this little spot on the other hand I don't hate too much.” He murmured as he brushed his nose against my side, kissing me tenderly right where he knows I like it best.

Slowly he worked the sensitive region directly in front of my hip, where a gentle little hollow forms under the right muscle tension. The combination of his mouth and tongue on one of my most erogenous areas coupled with his chest pressing against my groin was almost too much for me to handle. I tossed my head from side to side, my hands gripping his shoulders tight enough to leave red marks.

 

“Ahh…Y-Yuki stop! I'm gonna' come…”

Desperately I tried to push his body away as mine teetered on the precipice of glorious release. He backed off momentarily, much to my relief, but then he glanced up at me, a devious smirk dancing across his lips as he readjusted his body much lower on the bed.

 

“Very well,” he whispered softly as his hands started to readjust my hips and legs.

Oh no… I thought as he got me to grab hold of my knees and keep them elevated. When I felt his hands spread me apart my fears were confirmed. I shivered with anticipation.

 

“No! Don't Yuki, please you know I-- oh!…ohh…”

I could feel his tongue as he flicked it sensually over my most secret of places. I blushed a livid shade of red, as I normally do whenever he decides to do this to me.

I gripped my knees as tight as I could and fought not to wriggle against his furiously warm tongue, even though I wanted to.

When he grabbed my cock and started probing my ass a little more firmly with his tongue I couldn't help moving a bit as I moaned. Soon after I was long gone, my cock rigid in the palm of his hand, my hands in his hair.

 

Yuki slowly stopped what he was doing and without really hearing myself I cried, “Oh god, don't stop!”

 

He dropped his serious act and laughed at my torment for a second as I lay there, cock twitching in his hand.

 

“I had to, you put your legs down and squished my head.”

 

“Oh...” Blushing, I realised I had done just that. “Sorry, here--” I went to lift my legs back up, but he pushed them down.

“I have a better idea.” He grabbed my hips and flipped me over onto my stomach.

Leaning over my back he kissed his way to my ear, into which he whispered, “Get on your knees.”

 

In an instant I was positioned with my ass in the air, shoulders tucked tightly against the mattress. Yuki leaned over me to place a kiss on the back of my neck and then started trailing both his hands up the backs of my thighs. The ghostly trails his fingers left seemed to burn and tingle as I waited patiently for him to continue. Slowly I felt his weight shift on the bed as he lowered himself to me.

Gasping, I arched my back as he gave me three tentative flicks of his tongue.

 

“Do you like that?” he purred.

 

All I could manage was a whimpering moan in return.

I felt his hands caressing my thighs and, impatiently, I wiggled my hips a bit, trying to get him to return to what he had been doing.

“Eager hmm? If you like it so much why don't you ever ask me to do it to you?”

 

I blushed. “Because it's embarrassing to ask for it, that's why.”

 

“What is so embarrassing about asking for something you enjoy?”

 

“I don't know it just…it is okay? You never ask me to do it to you so obviously you feel the same way, hypocrite.”

 

He pressed his hands to my back tenderly, and brought them down my sides until he reached my cock.

“Just because I don't ask for it, doesn't mean I don't like it, Brat.”

 

“Was that code for something?” I asked, “Do you want, me…to…lick…”

 

My voice trailed off and my mouth opened into a silent `O' as he started to slowly, rhythmically, work my cock with his hand, and my ass with his tongue. It didn't take long at all for this new configuration to push me to the brink.

 

A hoarse whisper escaped my throat, “Oh…s-stop…ahhn…I'm almost there…”

Yuki moaned, “Don't fight it,” and sped up his movement. It was clear to me at this point that he was as aroused as I was. I wanted to come, I truly, desperately wanted to be selfish and let him finish me off, but I could hear how turned on he was and I knew that wasn't fair. Besides, I had gotten used to coming with him and it felt strange to be coming alone when he was in the room.

It took all the will power I possessed to make myself pull away from his deliciously hot mouth, but I did it. Before he could figure out what had happened, I had turned around and pushed him back onto the bed.

 

“What are you---”

 

Before he could finish his question I straddled his hips and pushed myself back onto his rock hard erection. He tossed his head back against the bed and arched his hips up to meet me as I rocked against him quickly. He reached out and laced one of his hands with mine as I rode him.

“Ohh…god, Shuichi...”

 

He rarely said my name and it was hearing it at this moment that did me in.

I groaned and squealed as I came all over his chest and he took the opportunity to quickly roll us onto our sides. With one arm hooked up behind my knee and the other around my chest he proceeded to fuck me harder than I ever remember him doing so before. He was hitting me in just the right place, and it felt amazing after having just come, but I was already going limp; not that I minded. I came twice in under an hour, otherwise he could have easily brought me to orgasm again. His technique was flawless.

 

I was just starting to feel the friction between us a little more than I like to when he buried his face in my neck. As he began moaning my name I squeezed him tightly and bucked back against his now extremely rapid thrusting to help him finish. He came abruptly, uttering a low pitched keening moan into my hair, as he so often did when we had sex in this position.

 

“I love you,” I whispered quietly, my eyes closed in satisfaction as I affectionately stroked the arm he had wrapped around my chest.

 

He whispered something back as he squeezed me tightly, but it was so quiet and muffled by my neck that I couldn't understand it; However I didn't ask him to repeat himself. Even though our second round of sex that night had started with a question born from my own insecurities, I didn't need to know what he'd said because I already knew:

I love you too…