Gravitation Fan Fiction ❯ Kin no Shuichi ❯ 5: If I Say Things Like I Love You ( Chapter 5 )

Kin no Shuichi Written by:Chochowilliams Disclaimer:I do not own Gravitationor the characters from it.  I do not make any money from the writing of this story. Summary:  Things were good.  Or so Shuichi thought, but one mistake by Eiri could throw everything they’ve worked so heard for out the window. Chapter Summary:  Eiri screwed up.  Big time.  Now he was to find a way to make it up to Shuichi. Warning:M/M, romance, angst, OOC-ness, language, Shuichi/Eiri, implied Eiri/oc, implied Shuichi/oc Insert:“If I Say Things Like I Love You” an original poem by me. A/N:  Thank you to Paon, Hika, fahaar, 0928soubi at docomo.ne.jp, Acherona, lilgurlanima, AngelofMelancholy, Mrs. Hatake Itachi for taking the extra five seconds to review.   +---+---+---+   Chapter 5: If I Say Things Like I Love You   (Eiri)   He screwed up.  Big time.  No amount of groveling, pleading or begging would bring Shuichi back home.  Even if his stubborn pride would allow such abashing nonsense.  Call him a chicken, a coward, yellow.  Call him what you will, but he just could not do it.  What if Shuichi shut the door in his face?  Told him to go to hell?  Eiri was not sure if he could take being rejected.  Not after finally finding the one person he could see spending the rest of his life with.  He did not want to go back to the way he was when his pink-haired idiot first came barreling into his life.  He just could not.  There was no way he would be able to survive a repeat of that time.   He had to get his baka back.  He just had to.  Shuichi had given his life meaning.  Shuichi was his everything.  It was so out of character for him to think such romantic drivel, but there was no denying the truth.  Of course, there was always the option of dragging Shuichi home like he usually did, but…That would solve nothing.  Then again, no matter how far he was tossed, no matter the words spewed into his ear, Shuichi Shindou always forgave him.  Shuichi always returned to him.  Always.  He could never escape from his pink-haired demon, even if he wanted to.  But this time…things were different.   Shuichi claimed they did not spend time together.  Maybe he was right.  In that case…   “If-I were to ask you out, what would you say?”   +---+---+   (Shuichi)   For once, he was at a loss.  The argument he had with Eiri weighed heavily on his mind.  This was far from the first fight they’ve ever had and there was no doubt that it would not be the last.  But this time, things were different.  He was not sure why.  Maybe it was the hurtful words he spewed.  There was no way Eiri would ever forgive him, not that Shuichi could blame him.   More than anything, he wanted to go home to Eiri and apologize properly.  Unfortunately, though…   Just saying, “sorry” was not going to be enough.  Not this time.   +---+---+   (Eiri)   If only “sorry” would cut it.  If it was more than adequate, he would gladly say it a million times over; screw his pride.  Shuichi was more important.  He knew that was nothing more than wishful thinking though, as much as he wished it were otherwise.  It was because of this damnable pride or stubbornness or whatever it was that kept him mute.  More than anything, he wished he were more like Shuichi, able to…   “Say-the things I want to say.”   +---+---+   (Shuichi)   It was so cold in his apartment.  Spring it may be outside these four walls, but within, winter still brewed.   He hugged his knees to his chest.  Resting his cheek on his legs, Shuichi turned from the sight of the small space crammed full of piles of miscellaneous junk, including parts of old synthesizers, to stare out the window.  The sight of the Tokyo skyline was breathtaking, but he was blind to its beauty.  He was blind to everything but the pain in his heart and the turmoil in his head.   This was the first time he had been here in a very long time.  The last time he came was…it had to be when that rumor about Hiro quitting had been circulating and then he’d been locked in a portapotty right as Bad Luck was supposed to take the stage at the “Fly to the next Century” music festival.  During that time, he had fallen into a depression, once again, over the fact that he was the only one in love in his and Eiri’s “relationship” (or so he thought at the time) and hid here just as he was doing now (1).   What a coward.   He never really understood why he maintained this place.  What was the point?  It really was nothing more than a dumping ground.  He could always rent a storage garage.  It would probably be cheaper in the long run anyway.  As true as that was, where would he go when Eiri and he fought?  Going to his parents’ or Hiro’s place was out of the question.  There was no way he could continue to relay on them as he had in the past.  So instead, he kept his small efficiency.  Not even Hiro knew about this place, let alone Eiri.  So it made for a perfect hiding spot.   But…   He wished more than anything that Eiri would show up on his doorstep and sweep him into his arms, kiss him and hold him close.  He wished Eiri would whisper sweet nothings in his ear.   “Things like- I want to make you mine and…”   +---+---+   (Eiri)   He clamped a cigarette in his mouth, his last one he noticed disdainfully.  Cursing, he crumbled the wrapper and tossed it onto the dashboard.  Reaching for his lighter, he flicked it to life.  The shadows on his face danced in the light from the flame.  He brought the sterling silver lighter up.  When his hazel eyes caught sight of the printed sticker, he grew still.  Pulling the unlit cigarette out of his mouth, he palmed his lighter and stared down at the first family photograph.  A rare smile crossed his face.  It chased away the shadows.   The smile faltered as Shuichi’s parting words echoed in his mind.  Shuichi may despise him, but he…   “I love you- more than words can say.”   +---+---+   (Shuichi)   Unfurling himself, he groaned as his joints protested, winces as pain prickled through his limbs.   This was nuts.  He could not hide here forever.  He would just have to confront Eiri and hash things out once and for all.   Taking a deep breath, he pushed off the aging mattress and gathering his things, flung his bag over his shoulder.  Slipping into his sneakers, he gave his apartment one last look before he threw open the doors.  He stepped out into the bright evening sun and gasped.   +---+---+   (Eiri)   He shut the car door and gazed up at the building before him with a frown.  To think such a seedy place was only blocks from his first place.  Ho figure.   Making up his mind, he darted across the street in a lull in the traffic.  He patted his pocket.  Good.  He just hoped it worked.   +---+---+   (Shuichi)   Eiri!   He could not believe it!  How had he…?  When…?  What was…?  Once again he was at a loss.  Tears prickled his eyes.  Eiri had come for him!  Nothing Eiri ever did surprised him anymore.  The man 3was way too cool and super smart.  But…what was he holding?   Violet eyes went wide.  His gasp was lost amidst the noise of the traffic below.  The setting sun glistened off a silver circlet lying in the pale palm.   “What would you say?”   Oh, Eiri!   ---TBC---   Preview:  “Baby Makes Three”   A/N:  Take the only speaking parts in this chapter and you have my poem “If I Say Things Like I Love You”.  What did you think?  Incidentally, some of you misinterpreted what Eiri said in the last chapter.  Let me make it clear to you guys so you don’t get the wrong idea.  There will be no Eiri/Tohma.  Not even implied.  They were together but only having brunch.  It’ll be explained more in a future chapter.  I thought I’d clear that up because I absolutely HATE Eiri/Tohma stories.  Anyway, what did you think?