Gravitation Fan Fiction ❯ Pebbles in the Pond ❯ Reaching for the Sky ( One-Shot )

Pebbles in the Pond

Summary: Shuichi contemplates about his music and career before he meets Yuki Eiri. Slight Hiro + Shuichi

Note: Special thanks go to Anahita for being my beta-reader again! ^_^

*~*~*

Shindo Shuichi used to like the park near his high school very much. However, during his stage of slump, its peacefulness and pleasantness only served to mock him and remind him of his incapability.

Sitting on the grass underneath an old oak tree, Shuichi threw his cap towards the sky and sighed. His shade was completed eclipsed by the shadow of the leaves directly above his head. The sky was clear and cloudless, and spring had done a wonderful job in painting it with a delicate shade of baby blue.

The park was quiet like a typical lazy Sunday afternoon, sometimes interrupted by the cheerful laugher from children nearby. The grass they were sitting on smelled distinctly fresh after a cleansing shower of rain, and the artificial lake in front of them sparkled and whirled like some teasing fairies under the sunshine.

There should have been no better environment for writing lyrics.

But Shuichi had spent the past two hours staring blankly at his empty notebook and biting on the rubber end of his pencil.

Finally, Shuichi got fed up and collapsed onto his best friend, who was having a happy afternoon nap beside his frustrated buddy. Nakano Hiroshi, startled by the sudden weight on his body, opened his eyes and sat up, elboOwing Shuichi in the stomach as he yawned.

"What was that for, Shuichi? I almost got to win a million dollars on a game show in my dream! Give me my prize money back!" Hiro threw his long, tangled red hair across his shoulder and punched Shuichi on the shoulder Playfully.

"Hiro! I need your help! Listen, I can't write lyrics anymore. What's wrong? Oh my god what should I do?" Shuichi felt like he could start crying in any moments.

"Calm down, Shuichi. Calm down. Breathe deeply. Yeah like that. That's a good boy. Ok, now tell me - slowly please - what exactly is wrong?"

"I'm … very nervous about meeting Seguchi-san from N-G tomorrow. What if he doesn't like our music? Sakano-san said we have potential, but what if his boss disagrees?"

"Is that the reason why you are trying so hard to come up with new songs, Shuichi? You want to impress him, don't you?"

A hesitant nod from Shuichi confirmed his suspicion. Hiro could not help but smile.

"You worry too much, mate. We'll be fine. Where's your old confidence? You usually just charge right into things without much thinking. We can show him our old stuff. I'm sure they'll be good enough for Seguchi-san. Remember how much our audience loved our performance?"

"You don't understand, Hiro. We are going to be professional artists now. It's different from the amateur world. Music is all I have. If Bad Luck doesn't make it big with N-G soon, I don't know what else I can do with my life. With your brains, you can probably still get into medical school later, but I'm not as smart as you."

Shuichi picked up a pebble and threw it towards the center of the lake. The stone lost its momentum midway and landed close to land with a loud "plop" sound. Defeated, he ran towards the lake and looked for the pebble. He couldn't find it no matter how hard he looked. All the pebbles appeared the same under the water. All he could see was his undistinguished reflection from the mirror-like lake.

Shuichi turned his head towards Hiro and looked straight into his eyes. "I don't want to flip burgers for the rest of my life. I want to be famous. I want everyone to look at me. I want to inspire people, just like Sakuma-san did to me. I want to make a difference in this world. But I am afraid …"

"… that you can't do it." Hiro finished the sentence for Shuichi. "Seriously, Shuichi, I understand what you're feeling, but you can't push yourself too much. We should just do the best we can, cross our fingers and then hope for the best. Stardom is a tricky issue; either you'll make it or you won't."

"So you are saying … we should go with the flow, and let whatever force out there take care of the rest, right? Just like you, Hiro. Very sensible."

Shuichi jumped onto a big rock near Hiro, his sudden action startling his friend on the ground.

"But I don't wanna! I refuse to let some unknown power to control my life! My life is in my own hands! I want to be like Sakuma-san, and I'll do everything to achieve that, damn it! No one can stop me!"

Hiro was impressed. He always knew that once Shuichi set his goal, he would not stop until he reached the destination. However, sometimes even Hiro underestimated Shuichi's willpower, since his friend spent most of his time either crying over the most trivial problem he encountered, or laughing at the smallest event he happened to stumble upon. People simply did not associate crybabies with attributes like being strong-willed and determined.

Hiro knew that Shuichi was strong, in the sense that he wouldn't let anything to defeat him. Sure, he fell into slumps easily and was emotionally unstable, but he wouldn't stop, for any reason, until he finally obtained what he wanted.

He grinned at his small-framed friend. "Shuichi, if I didn't know you any better, I would say you are sexually frustrated, the way you are screaming and bouncing around. You have way too much energy and you need to wear some of it off. Get yourself a lover or something. It's not a good idea to be so rigid about a particular thing, you know."

Getting no response from Shuichi, Hiro walked towards his friend, leaned closer and whispered to his left ear, "if you pay me ten thousand yen, I'll help you get some of the steam off. Deal?"

As expected, Shuichi turned an interesting shade of red. Hiro chuckled to himself. Shuichi was really too transparent for his own good.

Seeing his band mate's amused expression, Shuichi realized that Hiro teased him again. Pouting, he pulled out a box of Pocky from his backpack and tucked the strawberry end of a Pocky stick into his mouth, spinning the biscuit with his lips like it was a cigarette.

"I dare you finish this Pocky with me from the other end. Whoever dodges first has to pay for tonight's dinner!"

Hiro smirked and sighed. He wasn't one to back down from a dare, especially one from his oblivious band mate. Shuichi was clueless as always. Well, that was part of the charm of his lifelong friend.

At the end, no one exactly won the match, since both finished the Pocky at the same time without backing off.

*~*~*

After they finished dinner at a local MacDonald's, Hiro went to sleep over at Shuichi's house. They were unusually quiet until they settled down in Shuichi's room.

"Hiro, you can take my bed, I think I'll sleep on the floor. I don't think I'll get much sleep tonight anyway."

"Still thinking about the lyrics?"

"Yeah … and no. I had some ideas, but I'm not sure how I can present it. It's like a worm wriggling inside my body, waiting for first chance to get out. It's frustrating!"

"That's sick! Couldn't you use a better analogy, maybe something more poetic and elegant?" Hiro smacked Shuichi's head with a pillow.

"WHAT? If you are so creative, then YOU should write the song instead!"

Not before long the small pillow fight had progressed into a full-scare war between the two teenagers. Every movable item in Shuichi's room was used as potential weapon; they didn't stop until someone marched into the bedroom.

"THAT'S ENOUGH! I'M TRYING TO READ NEXT DOOR! WILL YOU PLEASE STOP YOUR CHILDISH FIGHT AND KINDLY ACT YOUR AGE? YOU GUYS HAVE ALREADY GRADUATED HIGH SCHOOL!" Shindo Maiko's loud roar had effectively silenced the two older boys.

Hiro apologized at once, "sorry, Maiko-chan, we got carried away."

Shuichi knew that they were being too loud, but his brotherly stubbornness stopped him from admitting his fault to Maiko. "Chill out, little sister. I didn't complain when you and your friends squeaked loudly about some guy's interview on TV last night! What were you watching anyway?"

Maiko protested. "It wasn't any guy! He's my favorite author and he rarely appears on TV despite his popularity! Do you know how much we looked forward to the interview? He's so hot! Aw, I would have paid dearly for a lock of his hair - such fine, silky blond hair …"

"Yeah, we completely understand your obsession with some middle-aged writer dude," said Shuichi as he pushed Maiko out of his room. "Good night to you too and may you meet him in your dreamland. Bye."

"But he's not even thirty yet. How can you call him middle-aged? How can …" With a loud slam, Shuichi had somehow blocked out Maiko's voice with the thick, wooden door. He rolled his eyes at Hiro and muttered, "teenage girls."

Hiro laughed in spite of himself, "you two always crack me up! Shuichi, I think you and your sister are more alike than you realize yourself!"

"How so?"

Hiro pointed at the Nittle Grasper poster on the wall and intimidated his best friend's voice and gesture, "Oh Sakuma-san is a god! God, I tell you! Did you remember his echo song at the last concert? He went shirtless and embraced Seguchi-san! And his voice! It was so rich and smooth and sexy at the same time! OH! I will pay ANYTHING for a chance to meet him! I can never be like him for the rest of my life!"

"I do NOT talk like this," said Shuichi with indulgence.

"Yes, you totally do."

"No, I do NOT. I refuse to believe it. Show me proof."

Shuichi went pale when his friend waved a Mini Disc in front of his eyes. "You … you REALLY did record our conversation?"

"Just teasing you, mate. This is a recording of our live performance from the Cultural Festival last month. Enjoy. It's getting late now; if you want to stay up all night, feel free, but I'm gonna go to bed now."

Hiro patted Shuichi's head and handed him the MD.

He added softly, "you have to figure it out yourself, Shuichi. There's only so much I can help you with my guitar. But you need to find out what's the most important thing in your life yourself. Just remember, I'll always be there when you need me. Good night."

He only took up half of the bed as he fell asleep, leaving his amethyst-eyed friend confused yet touched by his words.

*~*~*

Shuichi glanced at his clock. Three o'clock in the morning. They were supposed to meet Sakano-san again at two o'clock in the afternoon and go to the N-G Building together to meet Seguchi-san for the first time.

And he was still trying to write lyrics.

Gravitation is stronger … than ties …Ok, that sounded lame. Scratch that.

Gravitation is … no match … for love … it is stronger than … now, what word was he looking for, in order to end the lyrics with impact? Stronger than ties … stronger than relationship … stronger than fate …still sounded wrong somehow.

Shuichi felt trapped by his limitations. It was like he attached a collar onto his own neck, tied the leash to a pillar, and ran around in circles like a dog frustrated to break free and impotent to do so. He did not know what to do anymore. His future depended on the meeting tomorrow, and here he was, still struggling with words. However, Shuichi felt that he had to get it right.

Like Hiro said, there was nothing else he could do. Skills were important in the music arena, but luck and opportunities were what Bad Luck needed the most. Shuichi liked the feeling of pursuing things; his blood boiled with excitement when he had something to look forward to.

Unfortunately, his life was currently stalled - he couldn't make a move until others, such as the president of N-G, his manager, his producer or even his band mate, made one first.

Shuichi knew that he was a good singer; maybe not as wonderful as Sakuma Ryuichi, but given time, he had no doubt that he would improve and rise to his idol's level. He had the most supportive friend with him in the band, and they were just recently recruited by the largest entertainment company in Japan. Life was going smoothly for him.

But why did Shuichi feel that he was missing something?

He went downstairs, popped his Nittle Grasper concert tape into the VCR and pressed the mute button. He could recall the song and music in perfect pitch even though there was no sound coming from the TV set.

Sakuma-san looked determined and confident on stage. He looked like he was singing for everyone in the stadium. Shuichi was in awe with his idol's charisma again.

Maybe he would never be as good as Sakuma-san.

Shuichi's confidence seemingly evaporated right at spot. What was he thinking when he thought he could ever be as good as the immortal on stage? It wasn't impossible. Shuichi knew that he was just a normal human being, with too many faults to count. He cried too much, laughed too loudly, needed constant attention and reaffirmation, and slipped into slumps too often.

How could a mortal even dream to touch the sky?

Deflated, he wandered off to the washroom and washed his face. Staring at the tired face in the mirror, his heart sank even lower.

He traced the reflected outline of his face with his fingertip. Mirrors never lie. They only reflected the truth - nothing more, nothing less. What he saw was an unremarkable teenage who wasn't sure what he wanted in life.

He opened the cupboard underneath the sink and took the hair dyeing kit out. It was an impulse buy, and Shuichi didn't expect that he would actually have the chance to use it. He wetted his hair, poured the chemical liquid all over his head, and waited for the pink color to take effect.

He was the same Shuichi half an hour later, but he felt that somehow he had said good-bye to his old self. He washed his hair thoroughly and blow-dried his hair.

He went back to his room, snuggled close to Hiro's warm body and pulled a blanket over them, his vow to sleep on the floor forgotten.

Shuichi didn't wake up until his mother screamed at the discovery of his new hair color the next morning.

*~*~*

The meeting with Seguchi-san went fine, much to the relief of Shuichi and Hiro. Their boss and manager didn't even blink an eye at the vocalist's new hair color. Maybe they were both used to the typical eccentric behaviors of rock stars.

Shuichi was relived to find that the CEO of N-G Entertainment, although appeared to be business-like and distant, was friendly to his newest band Bad Luck. He was disappointed that he didn't get to see Sakuma-san in person around in the building. But Shuichi wasn't surprised. A busy man like him couldn't exactly spend his time joking around like a child, could he?

But the uneasy feeling still hadn't left Shuichi after the meeting.

"Hiro, I want to go for a walk on my own. I'll see you tomorrow then!" Shuichi forced some cheerfulness into his voice as he bid his band mate farewell.

Hiro nodded. Wisely, he didn't say anything else. "Would you be able ok if you go home by yourself? It's getting dark on the street."

"Of course I'll be fine! I'm not a child anymore!"

Hiro gave Shuichi a long and meaningful look. "Alright. I'll see you tomorrow at the usual place. Don't think too much, Shuichi."

They parted.

Shuichi continued to stroll around aimlessly. The street lamp was dim and flickering. The buzzing of some insects occasionally interrupted the quietness.

Clinching a piece of paper in his hand, Shuichi groaned at his cowardice. He planned to show the new lyrics he wrote last night to Seguchi-san, but he got cold feet last second. Something was lacking in his words. He couldn't place a finger on what it was.

Lost in thought, Shuichi didn't realize how chilly it became. He sneezed and the piece of paper escaped and flied away. Shuichi gasped and ran after it. It landed on the floor like a leaf floating on the water.

Someone picked the paper up.

Hazel eyes met amethyst eyes. Rings of cigarette smoke whirled around like mist under the streetlights, and they slowly disappeared into the darkness around them.

Shuichi's heart skipped a beat. He wanted to say something to the stranger, but none came out of his mouth. Blinking, Shuichi wondered vaguely why a tiny hint of smirk was spreading across the blonde's face. He started shaking his head frantically, clearing his thoughts, and attempted to speak up again.

Shuichi felt that he had finally found the lyrics he was looking for.

Gravitation is no match for destiny.

END

Review time! ^_^ I want to know what everyone thinks of this one-shot!

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