Gundam Wing Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction / Ronin Warriors Fan Fiction ❯ You're Own the Air with Mina Aino ❯ Things are just weird ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

"Mina your own." Cye announced on the speaker and clicked something and the 'On air' sign flashed on.
"Hi welcome to Late Night Chat." Mina greeted, "I'm your host Mina Aino. Tonight we have a guest, plus I'll be taking phone calls from our listeners and e-mails. Taking the first call." She pressed a button, "You're on the air with Mina Aino, how can I help you?"
"Uh....yes I have this girl problem." The young man started, "How can I get rid of it?""Uh sir what kind of girl problem?" Mina asked.
"You see I'm in a house full of girls and two of them constantly fight over me. I need it to stop."
Mina began to ponder on that, "Okay I have two possible solutions for ya. The first being to tell them that your sick of them fighting.""And the second?" He asked.
"I can send Heero Yuy over there to do away with them. What da you say?"
In the room with Cye, Heero can be seen loading various guns.
"Does sending him over here cost anything?" The guy asked.
"Nope! Its free!" Mina answered.
"Okay then could you send him over here."
"Sure. I'm going to transfer you to someone who will take your address and he'll be over in no time. Call me with the results. Bye." She pressed another button, "You're on the air with Mina Aino, how can I help you?"
"Oh hi Mina. Its me, Nick Carter.""Where the hell are you?" Mina yelled.
"Mina watch your mouth." Cye said.
"Sorry." "Oh something came up. I have to cancel on you. Sorry. I'll do it some other time."
"Sure right. That's the second time you've cancel. Keep it up and I'll send Heero to get you."
"I'm really sorry. Bye."
"Anyways....." She looked at Cye and covered the mic with her hand, "We don't have a guest. What do we do?""Give me ten minutes and I'll have someone." Cye said.
"Bet no be the flyer guy outside." Mina threaten.
"Don't worry. It'll be a couple of my friends."
"Well okay......" Mina moved her hand and pressed another button, "You're on the air with Mina Aino, how can I help you?""Yes I have this problem...." The lady said, "You see I have this job and it takes up all my time and I really would like to do something besides it."
"You sound familiar." Mina began, "Is this Trista?""No!"
"This is Trista! You don't have a job except for-""Don't say it! That's the job I'm talking about.""How am I suppose to help you quit. Its your freakin' destiny. You should have been born on another planet besides Pluto."
Trista sighed, "Just tell the world. Your suppose to be able to help me.""Uh Trista I can't tell you how you tell whoever is your boss that you don't want to be the guardian of time."
"Really that's all I have to do? Thanks Mina!""Uh Trista you don't........" Mina sighed and pressed the next button, "You're own the air with Mina Aino, how can I help you?""I'm your biggest fan!" The male voice yelled.
"Thank you.""I love you and worship you. I wish you could feed me and walk me."
Mina looked around the room and then at Cye who just shrugged his shoulders.
"Uh....sir. What exactly are you?""My names Scooby and I'm a dog."
"A......dog?""Yep!""This is some kind of joke, right?""Nope. I solve mysterious with my friends."
"A mystery solving talking dog. Wow aren't you special?""Sure am. I lick your poster everyday.""Hanging up now!" Mina announced disgusted and clicked the button, "Give me a second to regain control. Listen to a song." She moved the microphone and turned around in her chair, "Cye, where are your friends? I can't take another one of those calls."
"Their right at the door." Cye pointed at the door that lead out the room Mina was in. She stoop up and opened the door and turned back to Cye, "Rowen Hashiba and Sage Date?"
"Hey that's all I could get.""Nothings wrong with us." Rowen said, "We don't lick your poster everyday.""We visualize and pretend to be in bed with you instead." Sage added.
"Must we go there?" She asked.
"We don't have to go there. I mean we shouldn't go there. Were in public." Sage replied.
Mina just pretend not to hear that last comment and headed back to her seat, "Sit over there." She pointed to the other chairs. They both sat down and Cye hit a button, "Hi welcome back. Our guest have arrive. Say hello Rowen and Sage.""Hi." They both greeted.
"Okay were going to answer a few callers questions and find out a little about our guest." She pressed a button, "You're on the air with Mina Aino and her two guest, can we help you?""Uh yes I would like to know how I could get a boy to like me?"
"One of you guys want to take it?" Mina asked.
"Sure." Rowen agreed, "Be nice. Become his friend, feed him and-"
"Say you'll sleep with him on the first date and congratulation you have your man." Sage finished.
"What if it doesn't work?" She asked.
"There's always the alternative. I can send Heero down there to force him to go out with you." Mina suggested.
"Uh....you can't do that.""Why can't I?""Cause he's the one I'm trying to get.""I knew you sounded familiar!" Sage exclaimed, "Your that girl that don't like wars. Relena Peacecraft."
"She is isn't she." Rowen said.
"Well we'll have to do the other alternative." Mina said.
"And that is?" Relena asked."Get him jealous. Go out with another guy.""I could never do that.""Well then I don't know what to tell you.""Did you try feeding him?" Rowen asked.
"No.""Then try it.""Okay. Thank you."
Mina pressed the button as she shook her head, "You're on the air, how can we help you?"
"Hey Mina, how come you hung up on me?""Is this that dog again?""Scooby. My name is Scooby.""How can a dog use the phone?" Rowen asked.
"Shaggy dialed for me." He answered.
"Somebody do something about this dog." Mina pleaded.
"I got to go." Scooby said, "Bye.""Bye."Licking noises can be heard over the phone, "See I licked your poster." After that a dial tone.
"Mina are you okay?" Sage asked."Disturbing......." Was her reply.
"Yes we can see."
"I feel so violated." Mina said.
"Uh you have more calls." Rowen brought up.
"Sage, be a dear and press a button.""Uh okay." Sage pressed a button, "Now what?""Greet them.""You're own the air. I'm Sage, and with me is Rowen and a now traumatized Mina."
"Hey Mina, I just wanted to say that I love your show and to make sure you were okay." The man said.
"Do you have a problem?" Sage asked.
"No not really. Just wanted to see if Mina was okay."Rowen looked at Sage and then at Cye and then back at Sage, "What are you about to do?""Hey buddy. What if I told you she wasn't okay, but she was passed out on the floor?""Is she passed out on the floor?" They asked.
"What's your name?" Sage asked, "Tell me and I'll tell you if she or not."
"Its Brock. Now is she passed out?"
"Absolutely!" Sage answered, "She's twitching too. Might be dead. Rowen take over let me go check her pulse." Sage just sat back in his chair.
"She can't be dead!" Brock yelled.
"Don't worry she's fine." Rowen assured, "Its just you didn't have a problem and Sage wanted to give you one.""Why kind of problem?""Were sorry the number you have dial is hanging up on you." Sage pressed another button, "This radio hosting thing is fun."
The heard a crash at the door and all turned to it a giant brown dog stood there, "Scooby has come to see you Mina."
Mina slowly looked at him and then proceeded to scream hysterically, "Stay away!"
Scooby walked closer to Mina, "But I'm your biggest fan.""Yes and your also a talking dog. Not her type." Sage pointed out.
"Not even her species." Rowen added.
"It doesn't matter." Scooby said and ran up to Mina and licked her hand, "I love you!"She jumped out her chair and ran to the other side next to Rowen and Sage.
"Why don't you love me?" Scooby asked.
Another crash and everyone looked at the door. There stood Brock with a ax in his hand, "Which one of you is Sage?""Look we have a psychopathic problem." Sage said, "I'm Sage.""Where's Heero?" Mina asked.
"Off dealing with someone's problem." Cye answered.
"You will die." Brock ran towards Sage with the ax, who jumped out of his seat as Brock sliced it in half.
"Scooby loves you Mina!" he jumped on top of her and began licking her face, "Marry me!"
"Hey stop that!" Sage yelled, "Rowen quick call the cops. We have a psychopathic fan and a rapist dog on the loose." Brock swung at Sage, who dodged it and socked Brock and then took the ax, "Rowen that's okay. Handle the next caller."Rowen nodded and pressed the button, "Uh hi. You're on the air with Rowen Hashiba. Can I help you?""Yes, Your my inspiration Rowen." The guy said.
"That's good to hear.""Die! Dog! Die!" Sage yelled. He raised the ax and was about to chop Scooby in half.
"Sage you might hurt Mina!" Cye yelled on the mike.
"Oh yeah."
Rowen turned his attention back to the caller, "What's your name?""Its Ash!""Ash!" Brock yelled, he walked over to other mike, "Rowen's your inspiration?""Yeah. I think about you everytime I'm fighting a pokemon battle and when I go to bed." Ash explained.
"That's nice....I think." Rowen said.
Sage had kicked Scooby off Mina and was now about to chop him in half when he heard what Ash said, "Nice nothin' Ro. That guy gets turned on by you. He's gay!""Mina! Have babies with me!" Scooby yelled and jumped on Mina again and licked her in the face."Stop that!" Mina yelled, "Sage!"Sage looked back at the floor, "Oh sorry Mina." He kicked Scooby again and he fell over. He then helped Mina to her feet.
"Thank you." She walked back to her chair and grabbed the mike."I'm not gay." Ash protested.
"When a guy inspiration you that much your gay." Mina replied.
They all heard a crash, but ignored it.
"I just wanted Rowen to know that I once had a dream about him and me and we were-."
"Oh what was that Mina?" Rowen said, "Hang up? Okay." Rowen pressed the button.
Mina jumped up out of her chair, "What the hell was that?"
"Scooooooooby-dooby-doo!" Scooby came from under the table extremely happy.
Mina looked at the floor and Sage was knocked out, that's when she began to breath really hard and then passed out right next to him.
"Oh that can't be good." Cye said, "Mina fainted the shows over. Go home."
"But I didn't get my chance to kill Sage." Brock whined.
"I can do the show." Rowen offered.
"No no." Cye said, "This is Mina's show and she fainted, so its over. Tell the fokes goodnight for her.""Well okay, but I'm coming back tomorrow." Rowen said and turned to the mike, "That's it for Late Night Chat. I'm Rowen Hashiba and we'll see ya later."Cye pressed a button a button and the 'on air' sign went off, "Let's go home." He said and stood up.
"Stupid dog." Rowen and Brock said. They both stood up and walked towards Scooby who was near Mina and had weapons in their hands.
"Scooby's gotta go." With that Scooby ran followed by Rowen and Brock on his tail.
Cye looked in the room, "She's go company. She'll be okay." He turned off the lights and walked out the room.
The End?

A/N: That's it for this fic. Unless you want me to write more. I got this idea because I was watching Scooby-doo at 2:00 in the morning and thinking like a nut. Bye bye