Gundam Wing Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Straight Flush ❯ The Return of the Baka ( Chapter 11 )

Straight Flush

Chapter Eleven: Return of the Baka

By: Kolinshar Jackie-chan Benito

September-October 2002

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Disclaimer: ALL STANDARD DISCLAIMERS APPLY.

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Do NOT, under any circumstances, get an ALREADY enraged blonde mad at you. Especially if that blonde happens to be the future ruler of a crystal utopia. And getting FOUR already enraged blondes at you is worse. And by the facts, one happens to be the Gundam pilot of Sandrock. One happens to be a trained katana wielder, and has the commands of the winds at her disposal. Another is the Goddess of Love, but when you REALLY piss her off, Love-me-tender becomes the ultimate If-You-Piss-Me-Off,-Get-Ready-To-Rumble Queen. A big no-no. and last, but not least happens to hold to power to a Millennia-old silver crystal, which also happens to be the most powerful item in THIS universe.

Ah! Ah! *wags finger* You didn't find out who pissed off some of the most powerful people on Earth yet! Oh.. well, lets just say, he's lean, mean, and a big dork. Black hair, blue eyes.. sound familiar?

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Usagi was seeing red. Well actually, she was seeing the face of one of the most cheating bastards of all time. Black hair, blue eyes, tall figure… going by the name of Mamoru? Anybody heard of him? Well the minute Quatre heard that name and angry bull seemed to somehow run at full speed toward the guy with the red flag. The usually polite blonde slammed the door in his face. And not to mention that the mahogany colored door wasn't exactly all wood… it was also reinforced with neo-titanium… and that doesn't exactly go great when it interacted violently, slapping the front of people's faces. (AN: Not that I'm complaining..)

A horrible (AN: ::COUGHGIRLISHCOUGH::) scream pierced the air as Mamoru clutched his face, writhing in pain. His teal-haired companion looked down at him in surprise, making no move to help him up.

But when the former princess of the moon sees red, she acts much like a bull would. She hates red. It was on her bows. It's the color of his rose. Okay, so it's the favorite color of one of her best friends, but that doesn't count! Rei's is FIERY RED! (Not that it makes much of a difference *cough, cough*)

Usagi shook her head to try to rid herself of these thoughts, but they wouldn't go away. Red, Mamoru, Red, Mamoru.. a bloody red Mamoru seems like a very good appetizer for tonight!

(AN: *cackles* I'd give you advice dear *cough* protector of Earth, but you see, then I'd get a very mad blonde on my case. So, I'll tell you telepathically!)

A strange voice sounding exactly like Jackie's (me, the author), suddenly popped up in the violinists head as she shook her teal locks in confusion.

'Run.. Get away! Now!'

Michiru stepped away from Mamoru as she moved a safe distance away.

Whoops! Wrong person!

*grins*

So I've described two blondes so far. And yes, who could forget Minako? *blinks* Where is Minako?

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Words of advice.

Never, ever, once again stuff a pie in Heero Yui's face. And immediately hurl another pie toward the more.. *manly* areas of the anatomy of the male body. No sooner afterward, have hot coffee splash in his face. It does not suit well with his mood. And it sorely reduced the ego of the man.

Heero seemed to be okay with the pie. He even managed a fraction of a hundredths grin. Heero had gone stiff, making no move whatsoever, when the hot coffee slipped down his face slowly. Drip. Drip Drip.

The lack of movement really freaked all the occupants in the rather large kitchen.

And when the Perfect Soldier gets a certain gleam in his eyes and mouth's, "Mission Accepted," that also is not a good thing. Plus, when the fact that he is the only one in the kitchen with a gun, it does make things a little queasy. Especially if you were the pair that had double teamed on him.

There was only one thing to do.

RUN.

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And that's how our dear Minako Aino got stuck in the pantry closet.

Minako snorted. You'd think with Duo and Usagi to feed, they'd decide to get a bigger pantry closet. But NOOO! It just HAD to be the size of a walk in closet, plus the fact was that wide ass shelved were overflowing with cans and boxes of food. And there was only enough room for one person to suck in their stomach and squeeze into the little gap. Not to mention that you were standing on a couple boxes of pop and had a broom sticking into your back.

Minako sighed.

'Note to self,' she thought, her lips smirking, 'Never again pick a closet to hide from Heero.'

A sudden urge to itch her nose suddenly went through her mind. And her hand already stuck somewhere where she couldn't move it.

Dammit.

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Makoto ran. Oh and like hell she ran. She wasn't one to face Heero's wrath. Ducking into a corridor, she quickly scanned the area. Hmm, no body here. Then she thought about it. Nobody wanted to face Heero's wrath. Although she did hear somebody named Relena or something that stalked him or something.

Footsteps were suddenly heard padding on the soft carpet of the hallway. Quick! Hide!!

Trying to tip-toe slowly away from the scene of the crime, she quickly made her way to the nearest unlocked room.

Too late. Arms wrapped themselves around the brunette as she struggled to get away.

"NOO!!! HEERO!! HEHE!! Well.. I'm sorry?" Makoto said, squeaking out an apology as she babbled on. Her excuse of missing Wufei fell on deaf ears. But a cold gaze from her monotonous solider cut her off mid-sentence.

"Makoto," A voice growled. Prussian blue eyes interlocked with hers, a menacing glare gleaming. Makoto swallowed. Glancing up at his face, she had to fight down her laughter. Heero's eyes, nose, and mouth were outlined with whipped cream. And his brown hair was damp from the water she had splashed up on him.

**Flashback

A war cry was heard though the gardens as Haruka and Heero stopped their chat. Well, they weren't really chatting, rather staring at each other trying to depict the facial words that echoed from their features. And they weren't really succeeding.

"HAH! Take that baka!" Minako's yell was heard. A slight 'thwack' was heard and the two athletic figures sitting in the courtyard sprinted off toward the kitchens.

Reaching the place where all their meals were cooked, they were surprised to see a full-out war going on between Wufei, Minako and Makoto. The tiled floor was coated with the cream filling, and little piles of tins were starting to stack in piles. Blueberry and cherry filling oozed onto the floor. Haruka gaped. Heero blinked, and if he was surprised or amused, he certainly didn't show it.

But the Perfect Soldier does tend to get a little emotional when a twin pie attack happens to slam in your chest and crotch area. All in all, not very good odds of surviving.

But wait! There's more!

SPLASH!

Makoto danced on to the counter top and dumped all the contents of a 4L water jug onto Heero's head.

Blink blink.

A vein began to throb above Heero's lift eyebrow. Prussian blue eyes glazed over and the expression-less face hardened even more.

Haruka knew that this was not a good thing. Inching away from her companion, she slipped unnoticed through the doorway.

Wufei's obsidian eyes widened a fraction of a centimeter. Ohh boy. Hey! Heero wasn't wearing spandex biker shorts either!! Where did his gun come from…? Actually.. I don't want to know.

***End Flashback

Grinning weakly, she tried to shake the memory from her mind. But the look on Heero's face when Minako and Makoto had double teamed on him had been worth it.

She suddenly felt a sudden chill, as the cold oozing liquid of ice-cream slid slimily down her back mercilessly.

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Back to the author..

Usagi and Minako, check! Oh yes.. who could forget Haruka?

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Haruka blinked. Was she seeing things or something? No.. the last time she checked, her eyes were in perfect order. She wasn't seeing Michiru standing in front of her, was she? Sea green eyes, teal hair, sea green eyes.. teal hair..

"Michiru?" Haruka whispered softly. The wind caught her words and a gust of air brought the name whistling by the violinists ears.

Turning around, Michiru was caught in the arms of Haruka.

(AN: AWWW!! KAWAII!! I was a baka for thinking I could split these two up V_V())

"Haruka," Michiru acknowledged, locked in the sweet embrace of her reunited lover.

A grin lighted up the face of the race car driver.

They were pulled into another embrace.

Haruka glanced over Michiru's shoulder and her jaw dropped.

"WHAT THE HECK?!! WHY THE *beep* IS MAMORU CHIBA STANDING ON THE FRONT PORCH?!"

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The acute hearing of a certain guard dog immediately heard the sharp yell of one of the guests of the Winner Mansion. Tasha barked, her sound alerting the other patrolling guard dogs surrounding the area. The three German shepherds, it seemed, weren't the only dogs in the area. A Siberian husky, and rather big boned greyhound strided quickly into the area. The group herded quickly toward the northeast end of the large estate.

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Around the area, a certain female currently having ice-cream poured down her brake froze in rigid rage. And it wasn't about the ice cream either.

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Minako blinked. MAMORU?!!! The canned foods that were teetering on the shelves fell to the floor with a crash as she raced out of the pantry closet.

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Usagi.. well, let's just say, Mamoru, well.. actually.. no comment..

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*rises from a grave slowly* I'M ALIVE!! I'M ALIVE!!!

AHH!!! *dodges all the flying plates and vegetable* GOMEN!!! *wails* I'M SORRY!!! Jeezz!!! I know I haven't updated.. well, in a while.. but.. hey! I updated! I PROMISE this will not be discontinued. I will updated as soon as I can. I am so sorry for the big wait!!! SOO SORRY!!!

Also, about the beginning, please, NO OFFENCE WHATSOEVER TO ALL THE BLONDE PEOPLE READING THIS!! Please! Don't kill me! It's just that I was using it for an example!! I'm sorry if this offends you in any way!

Well, you can send all death threats and flames to the review box as well. *mushroom puff sigh* BUT PLEASE!! SOMEBODY! Give me a nice review! I know I'm gunna get SOME sort of flames.. but.. PLEASE!! *falls on knees* FORGIVE ME!!!

Ciao babes!

~KB Jackie-chan