Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ [temp title] Beyond the Bounds of Earth ❯ Part Four ( Chapter 4 )

>> Begin Part Four

Slowly Heero awoke in warmth, his arms wrapped around the source of his warmth. He snuggled closer into the being. It was so quiet.... He could hear his own heart beat strong and loud in his ear....

Wait. His own heart beat?

He heard a slight giggle as he opened his eyes and pushed away from the warmth.

He was utterly shocked to find himself in Duo's bed.

"Good morning," Duo greeted with a soft smile, his face glowing from the light that filtered through the blinds.

"Oh Lord," Heero whispered as his mind caught up with all of the events of last night.

"It is okay," Duo told him, still smiling. "I do not mind. Besides, I find it is better for men to show emotions, it is just American men have such a sense of 'macho'. In other countries men cry freely and hug often. They even kiss each others' cheeks."

Heero just sat there, so many overwhelming emotions washing through him.

Fear and anger and pain were dominant. He was having trouble thinking, he was terrified to the point where the only thing he could think about was how afraid he was to go home.

But underneath it all there was also a feeling of giddiness and he had no idea where it was coming from.

"Heero, how about you take a shower? It is Saturday, so there is no worry of school or my parents. I think you will feel better. I can find you some clothing and wash yours, okay?"

Heero nodded. What he needed right then was someone to tell him what to do. He couldn't think on his own.

Duo showed him to the bathroom and got him some towels before leaving to find some clothing that might fit him, seeing as Duo was thinner and slighter.

Suddenly the phone rang.

Duo found this unbelievably odd considering he gave his phone number only to Heero and Quatre. Quatre because he suggested they exchange phone numbers and Heero because he wanted to make sure that Heero had someone to talk to.

"H-hello...?" he asked hesitantly into the receiver. He didn't really want people calling him.

"Hello. Is Heero there?" replied a frantic woman's voice.

"Who is this?" Duo returned angrily. Who wanted Heero? The poor guy was in so much emotional turmoil.... He couldn't let anyone touch him!

"His mother! He disappeared last night and I can't find him! I found your phone number on his desk! Please, tell me he's there!"

Duo paused momentarily before answering.

"He is safe with me."

"Oh God, thank you," she spoke, so utterly relieved that she sounded as if she might be crying.

"However, I think that he should return of his own freewill."

"What?" she asked, sounding now confused.

"He is very upset at this moment and in the shower. I will tell him that you have called, but I will not tell you where he is. I do not believe that your coming here will do him any good right now. He should be able to decide when he wants to return."

Then Duo noticed her become indignant.

"Are you holding him hostage? I'm his mother! I have a right to know where he is! Let me talk to him!"

"Lady, I do realize that you are his mother and I am not holding him hostage. He came here of his own freewill and he will leave of his own freewill. I do assume he will return with school being on Monday. I am not sure all of what happened, but I do not feel he should return anyway. He was in an extremely shaken state when he got here."

She didn't say anything for a while besides muttering to herself.

"I could call the police on you!" she finally decided.

"Do you really wish to do such a foolish thing? Do you not think that Heero would be hurt even more by that turn of events?"

"What do you think you're doing you bastard?" she hissed.

"Protecting him as best I can for the moment. He is afraid to go back."

With his words, she hung up the phone.

Duo sighed and set it into the cradle, walking upstairs to make sure the door was locked before wandering back down into his room to continue his search for Heero's clothes.

Meanwhile Heero was leaning against corner of the shower, his arms shaking as they hugged his sob-wracked body, the water slowly turning cold against his skin.

>>

Slowly the door opened and Duo saw Heero standing there with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist, water still running over the well defined curves of his body and he tried not to stare. He blushed slightly and managed to advert his eyes to the blankets, playing with them a little with one hand.

It suddenly dawned on Heero why Duo turned so shy and he couldn't help but blush himself.

How had he been so stupid as to forget that Duo was gay?

Duo thought he was attractive!

The two thoughts fought a nice little war in his head. He didn't know why the idea that Duo found him attractive was so pleasing, he'd much rather berate himself for forgetting Duo's sexuality than have to think about why it meant so much to him for Duo to think he was attractive.

"Um, there are some clothes that might fit you on the chair over there. You are, um, built, um...." Duo was so red it made Heero want to laugh. "You are built more muscular than me.... I guess.... Um, it was hard to find clothing that would fit your, um...stature...." Duo stuttered, finally covering his face with one hand, obviously embarrassed beyond all comprehension.

Heero picked up the clothing and walked back into the bathroom, smiling to himself as he dressed in the sweatpants and muscle shirt Duo had pulled out for him.

When he walked back in, Duo had gained a lot more composure over himself, though the outfit was very risky for the situation. Muscle shirts didn't cover much and sweat pants happened to be more revealing than one might think, especially when they were slightly small.

Duo stood to put in a CD and Heero watched as he set it in the small boom box, pressing the play button.

However he never made it back to the bed.

Heero, compelled beyond reason and nervous as hell, had reached out and grabbed him, pulling him close to his chest and letting his head fall upon the silky shoulder as the first few chords of XTC's 'Summer's Cauldron' began.

Slowly he breathed in the sweet, light scent of Duo, his fingers locking around the soft folds of this shirt, feeling the muscles in his back tense up with Heero's sudden and unexpected move.

He felt tears swimming in his eyes and bit down on his bottom lip until he tasted the blood in his mouth.

"Heero...." Duo murmured, lifting his fingers to his hair.

"I don't understand what went wrong...." Heero whispered as tears wet his cheeks and began to soak Duo's neck. "I-I thought everything was perfect.... My life...was perfect.... Sure, people wanted me to do things I didn't want to, but still.... I...I.... I feel like everything is falling down. I feel like someone has shoved me into the deep end and I'm drowning. I can't breath but I can see the sun through the water and I keep trying to reach it but I'm just being dragged farther and farther down...." His strong arms tightened around Duo's thin waist, almost crushing him against his body. "I don't want to drown, Duo...I don't want to drown.... I...I need someone to help me.... I.... Help me...."

"Hey...." Duo murmured, rubbing his back with his nimble hands. "Hey.... I refuse to let you drown, okay? I will not let you drown. I promise."

"Please...?"

"I promise...."

Heero breathed in deep and snuggled his face deeper into Duo's neck as the tears continued to fall.

"I never want to leave.... It.... I never thought that he would hit me.... Now...now I just don't know what to think anymore.... I think someone called the police last night. I think he's not there anymore, but...but the memory will be enough.... I...what did I do? I don't understand what I did to make him so mad at me! Oh Goddamnit.... I'm still crying about this.... I shouldn't be crying anymore, I know it; I don't know why I'm so fucking weak.... I can't even swim.... I can't swim by myself!"

"Hey, Heero, sometimes we need a life jacket before we can swim by ourselves, you know? When you were little, you wore a life jacket before you could swim, did you not? This is just like learning to swim again. You do not know what to do.

"And you should not be ashamed of your tears," Duo comforted, stroking his hair and rocking him slightly back and forth in his arms. "What your father did was horribly wrong, there was no excuse for that, none at all, yet your feelings of confusion are perfectly acceptable. If you were not upset about this, then I would be very scared for you. You just have to remember that it was not your fault at all. There is no reason in the entire world that a father should do that. I do not care what anyone says, that is inhumane and should never have happened. It is so very unfortunate that it did. Especially to you, Heero.... You are really a magnificent person, really. You just have to keep telling yourself that because sometimes bad things happen and no one will be there to tell you the things that I am able to now. You just have to remember that there are some things that happen that should not happen which you can do absolutely nothing about. You can do nothing about this. Do you understand?"

Heero was quiet for quite some time as he slowly calmed himself to a stable point and wiped at his eyes, nodding on Duo's shoulder.

"It's just so hard to believe that I some how couldn't have prevented it. I should always be in control of myself and the events pertaining to myself. I am supposed to be perfect."

"No you are not. You are human and thus you are everything but perfect. How in this universe and the thousands beyond that could you have possibly stopped your father from doing those things to you and to your mother, I understand? How could you have stopped it? You most certainly could not have fought back and you could not have blocked his punches and you could not have just not gone home. It was an extreme existential moment. You can control nothing but your reaction."

"And I'm doing a pretty shitty job of that," he muttered, down trodden as he pushed away from Duo and sat down on his bed, staring at the wall, ashamed.

Duo followed him and stretched out across the bed on his belly, looking over and up at Heero.

"Are you really?"

Heero nodded, not acknowledging Duo's eyes.

"And could you handle it any differently? Could you stop yourself from such powerful emotions?"

"But...."

"But what?"

"It feels so wrong...."

"Sometimes that which feels wrong is right."

Heero rubbed his upper arm self-consciously as he thought.

Maybe Duo was right.... But he refused to be helpless all his life! He didn't want to be nothing more than a car driven by whoever the hell pleased!

Suddenly, he stood.

"You have any Bisquick?"

Duo blinked by this strange question.

"Yeah, I think."

"How about some maple syrup?"

Duo nodded.

"Good. I'm going to make you breakfast."

>>

Heero proved to be a quite excellent chef and Duo was quite pleased. They enjoyed breakfast, both trying to be optimistic and happy, both maybe laughing a little too loud.

Then they decided that they should go out and rent a ton of movies and come back and just lay around.

Duo had said that his mother called, but Heero was in no hurry to get home and really just kind of brushed the fact off.

As much time as he could spend with Duo, he wanted to.

He could never act the way he did around anyone else. Duo didn't care. Duo didn't care that he cried and need to be touched and cared about. He could open the gate around himself to Duo.... He thought he'd built it up so well, but somehow Duo found the key. Now that he was inside, Heero wasn't sure if he ever wanted him to leave.

Or if he ever wanted to leave Duo.

The rented 'Much Ado About Nothing', 'The Bird Cage', 'Caddy Shack', 'Ghost Light', 'Gattaca', 'The Crow' (the original one, of course), and 'Legally Blonde'. The cashier looked at them like they were crazy, but neither of them cared.

Heero admitted his slight envy over Duo's car and so Duo let him drive back home.

They got a bunch of potato chips and sodas and lay down on the couch together.

Both of them were shy at first, but both of them wanted to be held and so in the middle of the second movie, Duo got up the nerve to scoot closer and let his head fall on Heero's chest.

He was beginning to grow quite fond of Heero and he couldn't figure out why.... He couldn't fall in love, no, not right now, but Heero.... He was so...so strong yet adorably helpless. Heero was so much smarter than everyone else he had met so far and he actually cared about what he had to say. Although Duo had made many friends since the move, he felt that very few of them really thought about much, but Heero, on the other hand.... Heero was.... Heero was amazing.

Slowly Heero let his hands play in the brown-gold silken wisps of Duo's hair. He had grown rather attached to the braided boy over the past few weeks and he didn't know if he could really handle thinking about all the reasons as to why. Duo was such a pleasant escape from reality.... So caring and so carefree.... None of the small things mattered to him, but he was so smart about the things that were so large.... He let Heero be himself and in his own way, he protected him. That was something Heero never had before and he never realized how much he had wanted it.

Duo was soothed by the feel of his strong, rough hands on his face and in his hair. He wasn't used to the tenderness that could be shown between to human beings, and he couldn't honestly say that he wasn't enjoying the contact.

Slowly he let his hand slide across Heero's chest until it reached his own cheek, where he grabbed hold of the thin material of the muscle shirt he wore and clutched it in his fist.

Heero didn't suppose that he could remember even what the movie they were watching was called. Well, he wouldn't have been able to if he had even been thinking about the movie at all.

His mind instead was sending outrageously loud signals through his head screaming how amazing this was while simultaneously trying to kill that thought. Duo was *right there*! In his lap! Snuggling with him! He *liked* him!

But no no! That was so wrong! What was he doing letting this gay guy just lay all over him?! There was something terribly wrong about that. Why would he ever let any male do that to him? Was he losing his mind?

And why did he enjoy this physical contact so much? He shouldn't! He shouldn't enjoy it *at all*. What if Duo did try to rape him like Wufei said?

He was *right there*! He was right there in his arms! What could be much better?

Duo slowly let his eyes drift close. He'd stayed up late last night watching over Heero to make sure he wouldn't have any nightmares. He was so sleepy and Heero was so warm....

Slowly Heero realized that Duo had slipped into sleep and he smiled to himself, watching his face as his body slowly relaxed and his muscles fell slack.

Did he really deserve to look upon such beauty?

>>

Duo's eyes glided open and he found himself moving up and down slowly with the rise and fall of Heero's chest. He could feel his heart beat pounding steady against his cheek and he looked up and found his eyes met with the deep cobalt depths of Heero's.

"Heero," he whispered, slightly surprised that Heero let him lay there so long.

"You fell asleep."

Duo nodded slightly. "How long did I sleep for?"

"A few hours," Heero replied easily, still stroking his hair.

A light blush painted Duo's cheeks in embarrassment and shame. "I am sorry.... I did not mean to fall asleep like that and all...."

Heero shook his head a little. "No, it's okay.... Though it is nearing dinner. You hungry?"

Duo once more nodded a little, blushing harder.

"Let's see what you've got, then."

They ended up having a gourmet meal of Spaghettios and Bagel Bites.

For both of them the entire situation was unsettlingly odd.

Heero 'cooked' as Duo set the table and stood over his shoulder, making sure that everything was going okay, talking about meaningless little things like the weather. Dinner they ate quietly, but there was an unbelievable calm and perfection about the entire situation that neither of them could ignore.

Afterward, Duo cleaned up as Heero watched. He watched him set plates in the dishwasher, wiping the table just as a housewife might, and once more, the feelings were too pronounced to ignore.

However, they could not be pronounced aloud.

"You still have to see 'Much Ado About Nothing'," Heero told them as they wandered back into the living room.

Duo smiled at him as he sat down on the couch.

"Does this mean we get to watch more movies together?" Duo asked slyly, winking.

"Yes," Heero replied. "Right now."

Duo giggled as Heero sat down and he flopped over into his lap, his head resting in his legs as he stared up into Heero's eyes with affection and Heero returned the stare with his own of adoration.

Yet slowly his eyes turned sad and he looked away from Duo.

"Heero...?"

"Are you just using me?" he asked so softly that Duo almost couldn't catch the words.

"What?" Duo asked, sitting up indignantly. "What do you mean by that?"

"Because you're gay.... Do you just want to see if you can get me in bed?"

Duo was outraged and stood in anger, storming across the room before storming back, unable to release such negative emotions and not wishing to show them.

"Why would you ever think that? Because I happen to be an affection person? If you would prefer that I not touch you, that is perfectly okay with me," Duo growled, rolling his eyes with the words 'perfectly okay'.

Heero could tell the upset that was obvious in his voice.

"I'm sorry, Duo, I just.... I jump to conclusions before logic has a chance to win me over, most times.... I just thought that since you were gay maybe you were--"

"Shut up Heero. You are going to do nothing but make me more upset."

Heero was stunned by the tone that Duo suddenly took with him. Heero didn't believe that he had ever seen Duo so angry about something before.

"You don't want to watch 'Much Ado' with me anymore?" Heero asked, trying not to pull a total puppy-dog look and have all respect lost for him.

Duo sighed, put the tape in the VCR, and sat down on the extreme opposite end of the couch while it began.

Every time Hiro's character came on, Duo would sneer at the television, until about half way through the movie when he felt Heero's head settle into his lap.

Slowly a small smile lit across his face for a moment before he let his hand fall in Heero's hair and let his nimble fingers lace through the soft mass.

Heero was glad that Duo was not upset with him anymore. He was just being stupid and jumping to conclusions. If anything, Heero realized that he probably enjoyed the contact more than Duo and that scared him slightly. He comforted himself by saying that it wasn't his fault, he didn't have enough psychical contact as a child and so he needed more of it now. The not-such-a-lie lie soothed him incredible amounts.

They were both able to enjoy the rest of the movie together.

When it was over, they made their way (with some of the soda) back down into Duo's room and lay in boxers on his bed. Heero laid on his back, staring up at the ceiling and sipping one of the sodas while Duo lay on his stomach, his chin resting on his folded arms, staring at Heero's profile.

"It must be nice to never have your parents in your face...."

Duo shrugged a little. "I do not really think much of it. They know that I can take care of myself and I do. Either way I could not change the facts and so I do not try."

Heero was quiet.

"Speaking of which, what are you going to do about your mother's call? I do not really wish to get in trouble with the police...." Duo spoke softly.

Heero didn't react as he tried to think of something to say.

"I'm not sure," he said slowly. "I...I guess that I will eventually.... Tomorrow.... I have to.... I have to be stronger than this. I have to return. I will return. Tomorrow...."

"Good. Sometimes you need to face up to your fears. Not that I would not mind if you did not decide to go home.... I am sort of lonely.... A lot."

Heero looked over at him and saw the truth and beauty in his eyes and replied, "You know me. I'll come running back to you every time I get scared...."

"You do not strike me as the kind to get scared often."

"I wasn't...when I was blind."

Duo paused. "When you were blind?"

"Before I cared to think about my emotions or the feelings of anyone around me. Before I realized that things could go wrong in my perfect life...."

"You can not let scary things control your life."

"I'm going to try not to let them."

Duo smiled at him. "Good. You are a promising person, I would hate to see you thrown away by fear."

Heero set down his soda and turned on his side, letting his eyes scan over Duo's smooth back and arms back down to his well-defined calves. He was more muscular than Heero ever imagined he would be, but he wasn't buff like Heero himself.

His fingers itched to turn him over and feel over his abs and nipples and his other deliciously smooth looking skin and just looking at Duo's boxers made him blush as he thought about what had to be Duo's well toned ass.

However he knew that those thoughts were so terribly wrong and the only reason he was having them was because Duo was gay and so he had to wonder what Duo thought was so wonderful about the male body.

Duo yawned slightly and shivered a little. Seeing as his room was half under-ground, it became very cold at night, especially in the winter.

Watching this and feeling slightly chill himself, Heero motioned for Duo to crawl under the sheets with him and they did so.

Duo grew slightly nervous as Heero clicked off the lights. He didn't want to be accused of wishing to rape Heero any more, because he didn't. Rape was terribly inhumane, especially to someone who was going through so much heartache as Heero was at the current moment.

It was Heero, however, the moved closer and reached out for his hand, taking hold of it and squeezing it tight between his fingers.

"I'm just so afraid to go back," he whispered and Duo realized that he was crying.

"It is going to be okay, Heero...." Duo spoke back, reaching his other hand over to hug his head to his chest. "Everything will work out okay...."

>> End Part Four