Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ 2 Reign ❯ A Toss Up ( Chapter 13 )

Chapter thirteen: A Toss Up

Exhausted almost seemed to sum up my mood, though my body may not have agreed to that. I lay next to Hilde and tried to stay relaxed, wondering why she herself wasn't sleeping. I knew that my body was completely relaxed-okay, so my mind wouldn't wind down. That happened with some frequency now that Duo was back. Duo seemed to be the source of a lot of problems, and obviously had issues, but unless I started training again, he'd better me in every fight…and it would take a lot of fighting to wind him down. Real fighting, too, not this crap we'd been playing at.

I would have to reach the same physical prowess he had managed, and I didn't have two years to do it. I was no fool, I knew that Quatre had set himself up with Duo as weaker, I knew he would not press. Wufei had never thought of questioning Duo's actions with us, and for some reason beyond my knowledge, Heero wasn't going to intercede either.

Hilde had jokingly mentioned to me before that the five of us could be like a pack of wolves. Quatre and I never really vied for the head spot, and anymore, Wufei wouldn't dream of fighting, but there'd been a time when Heero, Duo, and Wufei had done it constantly. After a fight that none of us would ever forget, though, Heero treated Wufei as an equal-and then that bitch of a nun got ahold of Duo and everything fell apart.

I didn't want to brood, this was exactly why I wasn't sleeping.

"Trowa?"

I turned to look at Hilde curiously, wondering if I really weren't as relaxed as I thought, "Yeah?"

She sat up slightly and I studied her eyes through the darkness, realizing that she herself was brooding over something, at least, thinking.

Just my luck that I was a guy and oblivious, huh?

She cleared her throat slightly and I saw happiness reenter her eyes. She'd been beaming at me all evening at random intervals. I'd just figured she was in a good mood, but evidently there was more to it than that, "Guess what?"

About twenty possibilities passed through my mind in the half instant after she said that, but as for something to say to this, my mind was blank finally-after several hours of brooding.

How did that work?

"What?" I asked intelligently.

She giggled at me, throwing herself into my arms, "I'm pregnant, Trowa…I really am!" she sat back slightly, thinking about that, "Well, okay, I'm pretty sure I am. I still need to go to the doctor and then…but…I missed my period this month, you know?"

I actually did know that one, shockingly.

And if she'd told me, then she had suspected.

I grinned at her in disbelief…and evidently, that was all she needed.

-

"Oh, everyone, guess what?" Hilde was obviously excited as she, Trowa, and Alexia entered our apartment…okay, that's not entirely true. Firstly, mine and Relena's apartment had two floors-and there was a stair-case that lead from downstairs built inside our apartment. They'd come in downstairs like normal, and come up the stairs to where we all generally had breakfast. She asked us this as she came onto the second floor and the other two were behind her.

Selena was beaming.

I looked to Relena, who looked to Selena as well, and Selena looked to Duo. Duo and I exchanged a glance, and evidently he didn't know, so I looked to Wufei.

"I'm pregnant!" Hilde squeaked before any of us could ask. My questioning look had carried around our entire circle.

"You are?" Marlea squeaked before anyone else could get their mouths around the words.

"I am!" Hilde replied, looking us all over expectantly.

How I was the first to pull her into a hug is still a mystery, but Trowa had a proud grin on his face when I caught his hand and pulled him to me, after that, things got a bit confusing.

In all fairness, I could have followed the conversation if I'd wanted to, but confusion is a bit more amusing. Relena, Hilde, and Selena were talking quickly, discussing why Hilde thought so and how she'd already called for an appointment with the doctor.

Sometimes, mornings fly by in a blur, and somehow, this morning did that. We'd had several things planned for the day, and after going to each, I found myself staring out a window. I was hard pressed to pay attention to any of my advisors, and somehow, they all realized that today was not a day to lecture a king who wasn't going to listen to them anyway.

I broke a few rules and ignored a few niceties as I moved into Relena's office without knocking. Anyone in the room would understand that her husband wanted a word. The second I entered a smile lit her features, that same beautiful smile I loved so well…

"You think so, too?" she asked, rising to her feet and moving to me, fortunately, she was alone.

"I think so." I agreed as she moved into my embrace, "If…if you want to. I mean…I don't have much involvement in the rest of it."

She giggled, pulling me tightly to her, "Do you think we're ready?"

"I think we are." I muttered, nuzzling her hair, "I think…it's about time."

She laughed a slightly nervous laugh, "Yeah…" she swallowed, pulling back to meet my eyes, "Should we tell the others?"

"Probably. Let Tro take the credit for inspiring an heir."

She couldn't help but grin at that one.

-

"I want to have a baby," Selena muttered quietly as she lay across my chest.

I snorted slightly.

"What?" she protested, rising up to look down at me, "You don't want to have any kids?"

"Sure I do," I replied, blinking at her-my mind went back to Kayla, and that was not a good thing.

"Really?" she asked, her tone all sweetness.

I shrugged.

She snuggled against me again, "I want to have a baby." she insisted.

I snorted slightly, staring at the ceiling, "With me?"

She pushed herself away from me, looking to my face. Through the darkness I could see that she wasn't exactly pleased by this question, but I was realizing very quickly that I didn't care what her answer was. Actually, I hadn't cared to begin with.

"What?" I asked.

She was staring at my face with something like pain in her eyes. Something had hurt her feelings and I cast about quickly for a reason. Nothing came to mind, so I was forced to meet her eyes again.

"You are suck a prick," she informed me, starting to crawl backwards off the bed.

I caught her arm before she could, "So I've been told. I don't see the relevance."

And that was when she reminded me sharply that she was not intimidated by me, but easily aggravated.

I rubbed my cheek, glaring at her. She'd turned her ring around for that one, and I could felt that I was bleeding.

"Fucker." she spat at me, turning on her heel and starting for the door.

I'd never let her just walk out after slapping me and she knew it. She seemed ready as she hit the floor, allowing my momentum to take me beyond her. I hadn't actually knocked her to the floor, though I'd intended to, and my jump carried me well to the wall as she hopped back to her feet.

"Bitch," I returned her insult, rising as well.

Fights with Selena had always been entertaining on several levels. For one, she saved the kneeing me, kicking me, or punching me in the balls for special occasions. Generally speaking, it was a fair fight and these little tiffs had never gotten very serious.

But then again, I'd never wanted them to.

I slammed her backwards to the floor, landing my weight on her and pinning her a moment. This didn't last long since I hadn't been exactly situated to really pin her, and when she rose to her feet again she kicked me in the side, dancing to avoid my hands…and then it got confusing.

One thing I had not intended-even in my anger, was to cause her any serious harm. I realized when she hit my dresser that I'd taken things a bit far…and when the thing started toppling outwards to fall on her…

I caught it, shoving it hard as she gasped for breath, crawling out from under it and sitting a few feet away, staring at the floor.

I kicked the bottom of the dresser, glancing back at her several times as I made sure it was situated, irritated with the thing. Tall and narrow dressers were annoying.

"Why are you still using me?" she demanded when I'd turned back to her again, her eyes narrowed, "Why the hell can't you just let me go?"

I raised an eyebrow at her, "I don't keep you here."

She stood, moving to stand in my face, hitting the lights so I flinched at the sudden bright. When I could see again, she was still in my face, "You don't even know what you do, do you?" she snapped at me, "You don't know what you imply in simple statements…" she took a breath, wiping her bleeding lip and glaring at me again, "I knew it was too good to last." she added, turning her back to me and starting out the door.

"What the hell is going on in here?" Heero demanded, moving into the hall and blinking at Selena, then at me.

When he drew himself up, I was ready, slamming him against the wall and staring into his face, "It's none of your god damn business."

He shoved me away with more violence than he'd yet shown me, brushing me off like nothing and moving down the hall to grab Selena's arm, "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." she muttered, suppressed tears in her tone.

Heero gave me a withering look.

I decided not to respond to that. He could think what he liked about me fighting physically with Selena; it had always been our way. She annoyed me, I hit her; I annoyed her, she hit me. Childish, granted, but effective.

"It's fine," Selena pressed, grabbing Heero's forearm, "It was nothing…just a fight."

"You're bleeding." Heero noted almost distantly.

I sniggered, "I could do it again, if you want me to."

I wasn't expecting him to slam me into the wall, "I don't know what the fuck happened to you while you were gone, but this is unacceptable!"

"Heero, please…" Selena muttered in the distance.

That only angered Heero more.

"I will not tolerate this bullshit! You cannot beat her and expect us to stand idly by. It's bad enough that you're verbally abusive…but this…"

Before I could really comprehend what he was saying, Wufei and Miguel were there, coming to the end of the hall to look Heero and I over before looking past us to Selena.

Miguel flicked the hall light on, which we all flinched at.

Wufei's jaw dropped as he stared at the woman.

"It's not what it looks like!" Selena said quickly.

What it looks like?

Something was screaming in the back of my mind that I was missing something fairly important-whatever that was seemed to know what I was missing, but I…couldn't figure it out. Selena and I had been fighting, it happens to the best of them.

But just then, the room exploded.

I'd never been great-shakes at Chinese, and Wufei's shouting what he was saying didn't really help. Heero was glaring at me as he pinned me to the wall, and Selena was trying to hush Wufei.

"Is there a problem in…here…" a guard who had been on duty stopped and stared dully at us as Wufei finally did hush. The guard's eyes moved from his king to the rest of us before landing on Selena, who was blushing as she stood against Wufei, looking at the guy.

Oh yeah, she was only wearing my shirt.

"Get out of here," Heero snarled at him, "And stay out."

The guard paled visibly, saluting before turning and running from the room.

"Okay," I muttered, shoving Heero off and brushing at my chest like I was wearing a shirt to be straightened, "I think you've lost your fucking mind."

I was, thusly, completely unprepared when he decked me. Heero was by no means a small or un-fit man, and the force of the blow sent me reeling backwards, careening into Wufei…who shoved me off to the floor.

I turned to look at them both in amazement-and then saw Selena's face.

She was scared, horrified, one hand to her bloodied lip.

I stared at her for a long moment before picking myself up…and jumping Heero.

-

"I'm living in a mad-house, lala-lala-la…" I sang as I bounced away from where Heero and Duo were glaring across the hall from each other. Miguel had disappeared, and Wufei was sitting with Heero. Relena was pacing from one side of the hall to the other and didn't seem to be able to think of a word to say to either of those ridiculous males. Jacob had decided that he needed to stay with Marlea, which freed me up to clean up the mess.

How'd that go again? Clean cup, move down?

Trowa was standing on the landing, staring at the top of the stairs as I started down them, "Well?" he asked, not pulling his hands from behind his back. He was leaning against them and against the wall, his legs were out in front of him and crossed.

"Well what?" I asked, sitting on a stair that had my face about level with his face, "I mean, really. What do you expect? Duo evidently was beating Selena and Heero walked in on them."

Trowa shook his head, "I don't believe that."

"Look at the woman yourself, if she'll let you. As soon as Jacob left the room, she disappeared into her own. It's the middle one, if you're wondering."

"I wasn't, really." Trowa replied, still studying me, "That couldn't have been what it seemed."

"You have any idea how scared Selena is right now?" I demanded of him, "She was terrified by the time Wufei and I could break up that fight. Heero's vicious," I couldn't help my pleased grin.

Trowa sighed, running his tongue over his teeth and staring at the wall a long moment before pushing away from it, "Fine."

"I'm gonna go tell Hilde."

"Don't." he replied shortly as he passed where I was sitting, "I don't think beating is the proper term. It's never been in Duo's character."

"Ah, but Duo's a fuckin' nut-job." I returned, "He's lost his fucking mind."

"Go have another drink, Quatre." he replied in irritation.

I watched him disappear onto the upper level and decided that this was the best idea anyone'd had all night.

-

"Selena?" I muttered, tapping on the middle door in Duo's apartment. He'd watched me approach then enter the room with an almost expressionless face.

"Go away."

"Selena." I reprimanded, shoving the door open and wondering how she'd locked herself in the room if the door wasn't locked.

Her eyes were puffy and it was very obvious she'd been crying. On top of that, her lip was swollen and cut-as well as other marks.

She looked away from my eyes, "It's not what it looks like." she pressed, pulling a pair of sweats up under the shirt she was wearing-not in time for me to miss the bruise on the back of her thigh, though.

"What happened?" I demanded, trying to suspend all emotion from my tone. I couldn't help but be irritated, though.

"We got into a fight," she snapped back.

"Which is why you're covered in bruises and he's not." I agreed, leaning against the door and crossing my arms as my weight shut the thing. I wasn't sure what to expect anymore.

Her eyes narrowed and she turned to me, "You've fought him three times now…and he's only had one bruise from it."

"Three?" I asked skeptically, "Try once…once when I knew we were fighting…and twice, speaking of."

She flicked her hair, sending the blond sheet flying from once side of her head to the other. She was glaring at me with icy green eyes.

"You don't mean the time he attacked me out of no where, do you?" I demanded, "Because there was not enough time at that instant to react."

"You keep telling yourself that, pretty boy," she snapped, glaring at me.

"Can you tell me what happened, or are you scared of him?" I asked finally, resigned now.

"I told you!" she nearly shouted at me, "We were fighting."

"Which is why you have that huge bruise on your thigh," I agreed.

Her hand moved to it, her eyes wide, then she shook her head, turning from me yet again, "You don't understand."

"So you say." I muttered, studying her eyes, "And to an extent, I don't. I never thought Duo the type to beat females into submission."

"Submission?" she spat in sheer disgust, moving up to me, "You all think he was beating me…even Wufei, who I thought understood Duo…"

"What is there to understand? We all knew he'd changed, but none of us had any clues as to how far he'd changed."

"He wasn't beating me!" she screeched, shoving at me.

Damn…she'd actually knocked me backwards.

"Selena, calm down," I muttered soothingly, resting my hands on her shoulders and looking into her eyes, "I'm here to help."

…and I ended up on my ass.

"I was a bodyguard, Mr. Trowa," she said in a bitingly calm voice, "I can kick Michael's ass in a fair fight, and as it happens, tonight would have been one such event had he not thrown me against that fucking dresser."

I stared at her.

She shook her head in disgust, pointing at the door, "Just leave," she ordered, "I don't want to deal with you…I can't talk to you right now."

I narrowed my eyes at her.

"You heard the lady," Duo's voice dripped venom, causing me to jump and look to the door.

"Oh, not you, now…" she muttered in exasperation.

"Fuck you, too." he replied easily, then focused on me, "The lady asked you to leave."

"Mike, not now," she nearly whined at him, "Can you just go away? Can you like…walk the grounds or something?"

"Why would I want to do that?" Duo asked her in amazement, moving into the room and grabbing me forcefully by the upper arm without actually looking at me as he hauled me after him, "You really are a piece of work, Nira."

She flipped him off and he shoved me out the door, shutting it in my face.

The lock flipped.

I started banging on the door.

-

I rubbed my temples as Duo moved up to stand in front of me, studying my eyes, "You really that pissed at me?" he asked sweetly.

He drove me insane.

"You want me to be?" I snapped at him, turning to the bathroom and digging to find a washrag. I hadn't washed my lip yet.

"Come on," he wheedled, ignoring the pounding on the door as much as I was, "Don't be mad at me…I didn't mean to throw you against the dresser."

I groaned, leaning forward over the sink in sheer exasperation. He always missed the point.

"Nira…"

"Can you do me a favor, Michael?" I asked, ignoring his hand on my back as much as I could. I loved him, and he treated me like shit. I didn't need to stay here, he was right, he wasn't keeping me here…but…

"Anything, angel," he purred, his tone completely loving.

"Just leave me alone," I whispered finally, "Just leave this room…and leave me alone."

"For how long?"

Always…always, always, always…

"Just go!"

"Fine, I'm going," he muttered, sounding slightly hurt, "Fuck…"

I watched him flick the lock and the door fall open with Trowa on the other side of it-he nearly fell on Duo. Mike gave him a look, then shoved passed him into the hall.

I closed the bathroom door.

-

"Where the hell are you going now?" Heero snarled after Duo in irritation.

"I'm going outside, Heero-sama," Duo replied flippantly, heading toward the back door of our wing.

"Where to outside?" I asked tiredly, knowing it would be easy for him to slip away from us again and wondering why the possibility didn't really bother me.

"I'm going to walk the grounds," he replied as he turned the corner.

I sighed, watching him go in amazement before focusing on Heero. The guy was muttering furiously in Japanese as he pressed and re-pressed a white washrag to his still bleeding lip. Relena had finally given up on both of them, not even saying a word as she moved into the royal suite. The flick of the lock had soured Heero's mood even further, if that were possible.

"He was beating her! I could swear it!" Heero snapped at me suddenly.

I jumped, blinking at him, "Something doesn't ring true." I argued again, frowning at him, "I mean…"

"Duo would never beat a girl," Heero mimicked, "If you'd come in and seen what I'd seen, you'd be singing a different tune."

"Think about it, Heero!"

"I'm sorry," he snapped, "But the image of Selena running into the hall with Duo on her heels kinda incenses me."

I groaned, rubbing my forehead, "I'm going to go talk to him," I decided, moving down the hall.

"Be careful, Wufei," he muttered snidely, watching me move past with his eyes, "If Duo will beat her, there's no telling what he might do to you."

I stopped, turning to focus on him in disbelief.

He spat at me.

I spat back, disgusted and pissed.

His lip pulled back into a snarl.

"Go drink another one," I snapped at him, "God knows, Quatre needs the company."

He blinked at me.

"Go get yourself plastered," I added, "I know! Go fuck some bitch. Relena's mad at you, right? You're not sleeping in there, if that lock means anything. Hell, Heero, the lord forgives all sin-go entertain Miguel!"

I stormed down the hall and out into the dark night, furious. Of all the nights for shit to turn sour, it had to be the night that Trowa was trying to celebrate. I understood why Quatre was getting drunk off his ass. He had no one to plan a true future with, he had his little girl, of course, but there was something special to…love. He and Jacob were roommates, not lovers, even though I had a feeling Jacob would be willing; Jacob was not someone to plan a future with.

Heero, on the other hand, had no reason to drink a half bottle of whiskey-and they had. Quatre and Heero had polished off one of the bottles I'd brought down while everyone else only had a drink or so.

And then there was Duo, who moved with cat-like silence. I only found him because the one light in our area happened to shine on the path he was taking.

I hurried to catch up, trying not to remain angry with Heero. He was drunk, and by the way Selena had looked, I could understand his anger. It really had looked like Duo'd been beating her-but that wasn't Duo…that could not be what Duo had become.

He attacked Trowa with no warning, an evil voice whispered in the back of my mind, He took that girl down like nothing the day she showed up.

I shook my head, trying not to think about it.

He's been gone two years and the love of his life was brutally murdered. The voice was insistent and I began to wonder if maybe I had more mental issues than even I knew.

He killed five or more men with a knife, he even had Trowa tied up with that belt of his…and what he'd said…

And then, of course, there have been other incidents.

Duo…had changed, and not for the better. Stronger? Yes. More cunning? Probably. Capable of things I'd never even dreamed of? God, I hoped not.

The path Duo was following, further, was very winding and uneven. There were times I wondered if he even had an idea of what he was doing. My thoughts were winding to even more unpleasant conclusions, and I really did wonder what Duo might do if I got him mad.

When the building first appeared, I had to pause to figure out what it was. The trees around us were oppressive, like the jungles of South America where we'd hid during the wars. The very air seemed laden with something dark and depressing.

The clearing, when Duo entered it, seemed extremely open. My nerves were further wracked with post-war paranoia as I studied the tree lines, looking for sign of movement…

But of course, no one was there.

It took me a long time to work up the courage to enter that clearing, and only then when I heard the sound.

Sobbing.

My heart was beating too fast, and I knew I would betray my own presence-but this was Duo. Duo Maxwell, the Cheshire Cat…my friend. He was in pain and even though he may have changed to something none of us liked, he needed me.

"Lord-god, what have I done?"

I froze, hearing these words and realizing that the building was an abandoned church.

"I bring strife to my friends…and…" another shaking breath, "and…you don't care." he breathed.

My heart fluttered again.

Duo laughed, "You never gave a fuck about me. I tried to live…to…Christ…Lanni…" there were several choked breaths and I rested my weight against the wall beside the door.

There was more laughter, "Kids? With me?" he guffawed and I heard wood snap and crackle like it was being broken to shreds, "And them!" more breaking wood, "All of them! Christ…I can't even have a fight with my girl…my…"

The silence was profound.

"My girl," he added in a softer tone.

I swallowed hard, trying to figure out what I should do. Evidently I hadn't lost my capability to track things. It seemed to me that he didn't know I was here, and if he did? Would he have spoken these words aloud? Why was he so fixated on the fact that Selena was his girl?

"Kayla," he breathed her name nearly too low for me to hear, "Forgive me…" there was a shuddering breath.

I jumped at the sudden sound-as if something had exploded. A moment later, something hard and heavy hit a wall, sending an echoing crash over the grounds.

No time like the present…before an entire platoon of armed men descended…

"Duo!" I called, moving through the door at the second thud and watching a pew slam into the wall-and freezing.

Duo's attention was focused on me with unnatural alertness.

"Duo?" I asked again, watching him approach me warily, gagging on the fear. This was Duo!

"What are you doing here?" he hissed in my ear, grabbing me by the front of the shirt, "Why did you follow me?"

I gritted my teeth, realizing again how far away from everyone we were. Duo or no, he was still stronger than me.

"Were you listening to me?"

"Everyone on the grounds could fucking hear you," I snapped, "God, why the hell are you in here…did you throw a pew?" I decided that innocents was better than guilt and lied through my teeth. I didn't want him to know I'd heard him talking to himself because I really was beginning to doubt his sanity. Of course, if he were insane, so was Heero…

He let me go, looking around the place.

"Let's get back to the palace," I added darkly, "It's too late and too fucking cold for this bullshit."

"Selena suggested I walk the grounds," he countered.

"That's nice, you lead me on a merry chase, and we can take the short way from here…and you'll have made the loop."

He kinda laughed at that.

"Let's go," I whined at him, "I'm cold and want to have another drink."

"Fine. Maybe Nira won't be mad at me anymore-it's not like I intended her to hit the dresser."

I froze, turning to look at him.

"What?" he asked, all innocence, "We were fighting."

"So she said," I muttered, not sure I believed it…not sure I could believe it.

"Whatever, you tweak." he muttered, moving from the building and pulling the door shut.

"Who gave you catnip?" I spat, starting off toward the path.

He laughed at that, "Yeah, really…"

I sighed, shaking my head.

I really did know how to choose'em.