Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ And Now For Something Completely Insane ❯ The Beggining ( Chapter 1 )

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY INSANE!

Part 1 : The BeGinninG

The Beatles, and the three remaining Gundam pilots, Duo, Wufei, and Quatre are all gathered around a table listening to a little tape recorder in a small dark room……

Tape: Hello, agents…this is your leader, headquarters has just informed me with information that your comrades, Miliardo Peacecraft, Trowa Barton, and Heero Yuy, have been kid napped!

John: they're not exactly kids…

Tape: Fine! Ummmm…Teenager napped!

Paul: ?! John, how did you get that tape recorder to listen to you?!

John: shut up and listen!

Tape: well, anyway, they were teenager napped…by the minstrels! Yes, the minstrels from the first sires! Remember how they just suddenly disappeared? Well, they had been plotting, for some time, to do this dirty deed! And now it is up to you, the seven remaining, to rescue them! We have found the location of the minstrels hid-out. It is in Australia-Sidney, Australia, you must go there and save them from, what we fear now, the worst! Good luck, agents! **dully the man on the tape says::** boom!

Duo: what the…

Tape: sorry, I didn't tell you I was going to explode…

Ringo: right….**opens the door so everyone can walk out**

Wufei: well, how are we getting to Sidney?

George: the car is out of the question…

Quatre: considering what happened to it, AND that we have to cross the ocean…

George: oh…

John: heh……I'm still sorry about the car…

Paul: …forgiven! Now get on with it!

(they all walk out of the room, and down the dark streets of New York, to a small hotel where they had been staying)

Ringo (putting the key into the lock of his bedroom door): hmmm…it seams to be stuck…**trying to turn the key**

(when the key finally turns, with the help of Paul, the handle begins to tick)

Paul: …what in sam hill…

John: **as he walks over to the two confused Beatles, he hears the ticking…** IT'S GONNA BLOW!! **Pushes Ringo and Paul to the ground, along with himself. Sure enough the whole door exploded**

George: **walks into Ringo's room through the severely damaged door** How covenant! They put one of those chocolate covered mints on your pillow that you love so much, Ringo!

Ringo: **from the floor** oh, joy…… **turns head to look at John **GET OFF ME, YOU TWIT!

John: **getting up off the floor** that's the thanks I get for saving your life?

Ringo: **getting up and brushing himself off** …yea… **Walks into his room and eats the little chocolate covered mint and becomes happy again**

~Meanwhile, on another floor~

(there is a close up of Relena and the picture slowly comes away from her face, then she says::)

Relena: A beginning is a very delicate time, know then that the year is 10191. The know universe is ruled by the Padashaw emporer…a name I cannot pernounce- my father…in this time the most presius subtance in the universe is the spice-something-or-other….**She begines to fade out** the spice explands conciousness, the spice is vidal to space travil. **fades back in** The spacing guild and his navigators, who the spice has mutated over 4000 years, use the orange spice gass, which gives them the abilty to fold space, **fades out** that is to travil to any part in the universe without moving. **Fades back in**Oh, yes, I forgot to tell you, the spice only exsists in one planet in entire unverse, a desilet dry planet with vast deserts, hidden away within the rocks of these deserts are the people known as the…as the…as the…Aztecs! Who has long held a proficy that a man would come, the massia, who would lead them to true freedom. The planet is 'A Racket' also known as………'DUNE'……

(the picture moves slowy back tword her face, hits it, and she falls backward)

Duo: **CLICK** I hate that movie… **changes the channal** she need to talk less…

~In Wufei room~

(Wufei is seen with a roll of cloth, he rolls it out on to the bed to reveal millions of different kinds of knives, guns, bullets, and pineapples.)

Wufei: ** in am evil voice** heh-heh-heh-heh-heh……**cheerfully** I'm set!

~In Quatre's room~

Quatre: **Playing mine-sweep on his lap top that he got for Christmas from all of his sisters** stupid bombs…**the computer begins to tick** …what the…

(What appears to be the ghost of the pineapple from the first sires appears to Quatre)

Pineapple: **in an echoing voice** Quatre! You must throw the lap top out of the window!

Quatre: NO! It was a gift from my sisters!

Pineapple: DO IT! Or you will die!

Quatre: ok, ok! Geez! **walks over to the window and throws the lap top out the window, it goes down to the ground floor and lands on a mans lap who was sitting on the patio of his hotel room, the lap top blows up and the man dies**

Quatre: well, at least that wasn't the first person I killed…**sweat-drop**

~In Ringo's room…again~

Ringo: **Talking on the phone with the person in the lobby** Yes, I would like to have 700 boxes of chocolate covered mints delivered to me room tonight…what do you mean they'll cost $350?! People get them for free on their pillows! …fine! I'll pay it! But I guarantee you that I will never stay at this hotel again! **slams down phone**

George: **standing in the, still smoldering, doorway** what in name of Joe are you doing? Ordering 700 boxes of chocolate covered mints?!

Ringo: satisfying me tummy!

George: oi…**walks out of the room to his own**

~In Paul's room~

(Paul is seen on his balcony with a big bucket of water-balloons)

Paul: he, he, he…**drops a water balloon over the side and it hits and old grandma in the head, upon contact, Paul backs up against the wall in order not to be seen**

Grandma: you kids today! I do declare that you are menaces!

Paul: **trying to refrain from laughing, but then nearly jumps out of him pajama's when he is taped on the shoulder by John**

John: having fun, are we? **Looks over the ledge to see hundreds of splat marks with little rings in the middle of them, indicating that Paul had been hitting people**

Paul: **trying to hide the bucket** e-heh…

John: Can I have some water-balloons? There is a really cute girl I wanna hit just below me room! **smiles widely**

Paul: I guess so, as long as you don't tell the manager who gave them to you…

John: **taking some water-balloons from the bucket** no! I won't! Thanks, mate!

Paul: no problem… **looks over the ledge for more old people**

~In George's room~

(George is seen watching a Spanish soup opera, with the door open…John walks past, sees George, and walks in)

John: What in the world are you watching?!

George: **says something in Spanish**

John: …**Throws a water balloon at him**

George: thanks…I needed that…**changes channel**

~In Johns room~

(John enters the room with his water-balloons, now one short because of George and his Spanish soup opera)

John: aww! I'll pulverize that cute girl in the morning……wouldn't you agree that that is a nice wake up call? And to make it even better! **Puts the balloons in the refrigerator** he-he-he…I love being evil…**walks over to the bed and sits down, turns on the TV and sees a close up of Relena**

John: AHHH! **Turns off the TV like he's seen the devil** what do you mean, author person?! I have seen the devil! **There is a drum roll from Ringo's room** …ok…I guess that was appropriate for the moment…but I'm gonna go to sleep now! Bye! **turns off the light**

~later that night~

(there is a knock on Ringo's…remaining door)

Ringo: **with a robe on he answers the door** yea, what do you want?

(a lady that is pulling a very large cart says::)

Lady: here are your 700 boxes of chocolate covered mints that you ordered sir!

Ringo: **Looks at clock** IT IS 2 AM! why are you bugging me this late? I mean early!? No wait I was right the first time! No, no I wasn't…

Lady: you said you wanted them delivered tonight!

Ringo: well, come back tomorrow!

Lady: it is tomorrow, sir.

Ringo: oh, bloody `ell… **slams door** **and yells out** YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! **goes back to bed**

~The next morning~

(The gang met up in the main lobby, Ringo is lugging around a big cart of chocolate covered mints, with a considerably lighter wallet. Everyone is standing around with his luggage.)

Paul: Have a nice sleep everyone?

Ringo: NO!!! **whines**

John: Our car is waiting on us outside!

Duo: OK! Everyone! Out to the car!! ^-^!!

(they all walk out of the building to the main entrance where there are some reporters eager to talk to the Beatles…)

Reporter: what do you expect to find in Australia, boys?

John: Australians I should think!

Ringo: and little hoppy things!

Another Reporter: Paul! Why are you going to Austalia?

Paul: didn't you watch 20/20 yesterday?

Another Reporter: no…why?

George: It said why we are going! **Jumps in car**

(A herd of girls comes around the corner of the building)

John: Oh, bloody 'ell…**Gets in car**

Paul: YESH! **Follows John**

Duo, Wufei, and Quatre: -_-`` **they get in the car**

John: Where's Ringo?

Ringo (outside talking to some girls): Yes, girls I'm available on Thursdays and Fridays!

Paul: Come on, Ringo!! **Pulls Ringo by the collar into the car**

Ringo: ow…what did you do that for?

George: he saved you, you shmuck!

(John reaches into his bag and pulls out the water-balloons, then he rolls down the window and throws the water-balloons at the girls standing outside the car)

Paul: …you are a sad sorry little person, yet you have my pity…

Ringo and George: yes…

~Later at an airport~

John: I don't like these New York airports….there are too many passage ways…

Duo: I agree…

Wufei: section ZZZ-79? **Looks up at a sign which says: A-1** that is Bull!

Quatre: we have to walk that far?

Paul: it looks that way…

Ringo: lets get going while we still can! **walks up to main desk, where there is a cute girl standing**

(John pushes his way through the boys and says::)

John: hello…

Lady: hello, sir! May I see your ticket?

John: yes, you may! **Show her his ticket**

Lady: well, I see you the 'ZZZ' section!

Ringo: where might that be, Miss?

Lady: well, just fallow the signs, **Points up to a big billboard that shows the way** and here are your canteens, and first AID kit! Good luck!

Paul: that's really assuring…

Wufei: **forcing a laugh** let's get going before the wolves get us!

Lady: oh that reminds me we do have lions, tigers, and bears! Oh my!

Quatre: very funny…

Lady: I'm serious…

Duo: …ok…

Ringo: …let's go…**is trying to push everyone along, especially John who is glued to the cute girl** c`mon, John!

~3 days later~

John: **river-eyes** I told you I didn't like New York airports for a reason!

Paul: **with a torn sleeve and coat** I see what you mean, mate…

Duo: it bit my braid! **Cries, while trying to braid it back**

Quatre: oi…

Wufei: hurry up, we're gonna miss the flight! **runs over and gets on plane**

The Beatles: **they look at each other and say::** We know how that fells! **get on the plane**

Wufei: **Shrugs, then gets on the plane**

Duo: where's Quatre?

Wufei: ?? why is it always me that ends up dragging someone somewhere? **Runs off the plane and grabs Quatre by the collar and drags him on the plane**

Quatre: **River eyes** meannie…

~12 hours later~

(They landed on the most western side of Australia)

Duo: why do they have to land here…then we somehow have to get to the most eastern side!

Wufei: oh well, better than having to walk…

Paul: I think we do have to walk…

John: oh bloody `ell…

Ringo: well, if we do, we still have those canteens, and I have a map of Australia and a compass…

Quatre: well we need to head east! It may be easiest to go along the ocean and follow it to Sidney…

George: he has a point, Sidney is on the coast…

Paul: ok! Let's go!

(They all start walking along the coast of the island, luckily they were all wearing light clothes, Duo, being the American he is, is in black shorts a Hawaiian over shirt that hangs open…oi…Quatre, with his usual quaky's made into shorts…but a red shirt with a black stripe…and Wufei, long black pants and a white shirt…how original…now that you know the pilots clothing lets go to the Beatles! Announcer Guy?

AG: Yes, Paul is in blue jeans with a white shirt and a red over shirt that has a pineapple on it! I remind you the Beatles used in this story are the era of Sgt. Peppers! A lovely one! Jack E. Chan?

JEC: yes and Ringo! Wearing a pair of baggy blue jeans and a wonderful white shirt! Joan A.?

JA: George! The silent guy is wearing nothing but his underwear!

Paul: Oh no your not!

George: I'm not!! Who wrote this thing?! **cries**

JA: sorry, can't I dream!?

John: …

JA: he actually wearing a pair of ripped blue jean shorts! ^-^! And a white shirt that is hanging open! **Drools**

George: save me…

John: it's not all that bad!!

Ringo: …

JA: Jack E. Chan?

JEC: Announcer Guy?

AG: Author?

Author: ok! And now for me favorite Beatle! JOHN!

John: Hey! Can I get your number??

Author: **Blushes** John is in a pair of Lee jeans that are ripped at the shin, he is also wearing a short sleeved shirt, that is hanging open, with a trendy light black vest! **Smiles**)

Wufei: that was very informative, yet very pointless…

Quatre: I agree…

Duo: ¬.¬`` ok…let's get on with the story before anything else happens…to George…

George: **Cries** it's not my fault!

Paul: well, at least we don't have to see you walking along the beach in your knickers!

John: **Trying to keep from laughing** yeah, that's a BIG relief!

Ringo: I'll say…

George: …-_-`` oi…

Duo: ¬.¬`` again…

Wufei: ok…now that you know the new faction trends, let's go!

All: gladly…

(they all continue walking)

~Meanwhile on the other side of the island…~

Leader Minstrel: NO! They've gotten onto the island! We must stop them somehow…what do you think Odd Job?

Odd Job: I suggest releasing the dinosaurs, master…**smiles from the shadows**

LM: nice thinking, my friend, I shall welease Bwian!

Odd Job: …ummm, sir?

LM: oh, sorry I mean…I shall release the T-rex! **laughs a deep, evil laugh**

(as the leader minstrel looks over his band of 50,000 soldier minstrels, he smiles. Then his eyes wonder to the three gundam pilots, and smiles widely when catching a glimpse of the Kool-Aid smiley faces drawn on the duck tape that covered their mouths)

(Miliardo and Trowa begin thinking to themselves: Why can't Heero find a way out of this?

Heero thinking to himself: Why can't I find a way out of this?)

LM: Release the monsters!

(Miliardo Trowa and Heero look up in concern for their friends…then a minstrel in the back of the warehouse pushes a big red button releasing the t-rex's)

~Back on the beach~

Quatre: well, at this rate it will take us a month to get to Sidney…

Duo: is that if we keep walking all day? Or if we stop for a few days?

Quatre: non-stop…but who knows it may take us months…

Ringo: oh……**looks up and sees a small hut** hey, what's that?

Paul: hmmm…looks like a hut to me…

John: we know that, you twit…

George: he means who lives there, I'm guessing…

Wufei: well, John, you're the one always bursting in on people, so be our guest!

John: why not?

(John walks over to the hut and knocks on the door, no answer, he opens the door. He finds millions of test tubs models of various contraptions, and weapons. Ringo and Paul then stick their heads in the door.)

Ringo: what's that? **as he points toward a glowing light in a back room, sparks begin to fly from the room**

Paul: what in the world…

(John begins to slowly walk toward the room as the rest of the gang enters the hut. As John walks closer to the door he can here voice say: 'YES! I have done it! The ultimate weapon!' Moving even closer to the door, John stops, suddenly the voice that John heard became a person, a short, plump, Hawaiian man (this was obvious because of the tan that he had and the shirt that he wore said, 'aloha, from a Hawaiian' on the back…John took a few small steps backward.)

The man: AH! Hello! I was expecting you! Come in, come in! I have a few things for you! That is, if you are they…

John: **nervously** t-they?

The man: I am S! I was told that I may have some visitors from America?

Duo: we are from America…

S: but are you they?

Ringo: what the bloody `ell does that mean?!

S: AH! You are they! **He smiles as he looks around at the seven** I was told by Headquarters that four British men were coming along with an American an Arab and Chinese boy! You have to be they!

John: we must be…they…

Wufei: ho boy…

Paul: do you know all of our names?

S: a-no…I know the names…but not the people…

John: well, I'm John Len-

S: **covering Johns mouth** I know who you are, you're John Lennon! And they, **Nods at Paul, Ringo, and George** are the rest of the Beatles…

Duo: smart ain't ya?

S: and you must be Duo?

Duo: Yea! See you are smart!

Wufei: my name must be obvious…

S: AH! Chang!

Quatre: **Tying to keep from laughing** T-that's his last name…

S: it comes first on this list I was sent…**shows them a list of names**

Wufei: I Chinese…remember?

S: OH! Yes, I see! Wufei is you!

Wufei: yeah, Wufei is…me…

S: and the last remaining is Quatre!

Quatre: **Smiles** hello!

S: ok! Well, as I said I am S! And I am the official weapon creator for headquarters, and-

Duo: What happened to A-R?

S: They either died or retiered…but, moving on- and I am here to arm you with weapons beyond your wildest dreams! First we have the 'Disintegration gun'! My newest and greatest invention! **he wheels out a cart that has a rather small gun on it**

Wufei: that's……it…

S: oh, this is no ordinary gun! Watch what it does! C'mon! Follow me! **He walks out side to he edge of the forest, looks around and sees a bore** watch what it does to this wild bore! **he fires the gun and the bore disintegrates**

John: @.@`` whoa…**looks at the steaming heap of ash on the forest floor**

Ringo: ouch

S: And I have seven of them! One for each of you! **Pulls out a bag of the Disit-guns**

Paul: nice…**Takes one**

(the rest of them take a gun)

Duo: thanks, I guess…

S: it was my pleasure! And oh, do watch your step! **Walks back to his hut and closes the door**

John: **beginning to walk off** Why would we need to watch out step? It's a beach, like there's gonna be a big sandpit or a big HOLYYYYYYY COW! **falls into a hole**

Paul: you all right, mate? **helps John out of the hole**

John: I'm fine but I don't think-oh my gentle Jesus…

(John and the rest are looking at what John fell into- what appeared to be dinosaur tracks…)

Duo: no way…t-that's impossible!

Ringo: **in a very nervous voice** d-don't be so sure of yourself, mate…**points at something BIG moving in the wood**

(The massive creature sees the boys, they stand frozen watching it, the creature comes out of the woods and stands, all 50 feet of it, in front of them, staring them all right at eye level. Just as the sun begins to set, two minuets latter, the t-rex slowly walks toward them. It seemed to be looking mostly at John, only because he was standing in front of them all, then the monster roared a high roar right at the faces of them all. It did nothing after that, it simply rose its head and turned away. The boys, seeing the opportunity, all take off running into the forest, the t-rex, not being too dumb to relies the situation, takes off after them. The boys, being careful to run under only the smallest tree's to slow it down, see far in the distance four young boys, that appeared to be Kyle, Stan, Cartman, and Kenny…the South-park kids…The boys run by them with the T-rex gaining, but then the T-rex stopped in front of the kids, it looked at Kenny, licked it's lips, and ate him.)

Stan: Oh, my GOD! You killed Kenny!

Kyle: You {Censored}!

John: **Still running** poor little buggar…

Ringo: wait! We have a clear shot, and he's being distracted!

Duo: YEAH! Let's do it! **Pulls out gun**

(James Bond music begins playing in background)

All: YEA! **They all raise their guns**

John: READY…………AIM…………FIRE!!!!

(They all fire their disintegration guns at the dino, it shakes its head then disintegrates)

TO BE CONTINUED……