Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Childhood Reborn ❯ Startling Realization ( Chapter 20 )

“Oh God, no!”

 

Jacinda ran like a mad woman into her house and up the stairs to her bedroom.

 

“Dammit where did I put!”

 

Throwing open drawers she dug crazily. Leaving them in a disheveled mess when she was done with them, she charged into her closet where she proceeded to pull boxes down and tear into them.

 

“Yes here it is!”

 

Finding what she was looking for Jacinda found she was struggling for breath as her eyes read the words wildly.

 

Friday May 14th AC 191

 

Dear Journal,

 

I have been deployed for a mission, my first in a long while! It actually is an emergency. Some stupid rebels on the L2 colony have decided to mobilize and voice their ridiculous demands. I heard they were able to actually create a base! Probably some dilapidated old hotel or something. That colony has been a wreck for so long, I am surprised that it's still has residents. This battle should be a piece of cake though; I have fought enough rebels to know that they don't have what it takes! Gotta run, we're about to land!

 

Jacinda's heart pounded as she continued to read.

 

Saturday May 15th AC 191

 

Dear Journal,

 

On L2, about midnight, gearing up. Wish me luck! Not that I think we really need any. Although, if there is a God, forgive me for blasting a couple of bullets into one of your Houses. Blame the rebels not us.

 

“Oh no.” Jacinda whispered as she felt herself become quite heavy as her eyes danced over the words.

 

Dear Journal,

 

Fire

 

“No”

 

“Orphanage…children.”

 

“No!”

 

“Told to fire.”

 

“Screaming…so much screaming!”

 

“No!!”

 

“Everyone…nuns…priest…children…d ead.”

 

“NO!!!!!”

 

Jacinda nearly had to bite her tongue to keep herself from yelling as she slumped down in the closet, a worn open book resting on her knee with words that Jacinda could barely stand to look at in her horror.

 

Father Maxwell's Orphanage…gone.

 

It had been a long while since Jacinda had emerged from her house. Siero knew something was up and he figured the pilots did too. Knowing how private Jacinda was he decided to play it cool.

 

“Hey guys!” He said. “I am just going to go see if Jacinda needs any help. She's probably busy making lunch or something, knowing her. You guys watch little man and the mutt and I'll be right back.”

 

“We can help Siero!” Quatre said. “It wouldn't be any trouble; Ms. Jacinda probably could use a break anyway.”

 

Siero shook his head.

 

“Jacinda will skin me alive if I have you guys do any work. You know how she is! Be right back!”

 

And inside he went.

 

“Man when is that guy just gonna tell Jacinda he's got the major hots for her!” Duo asked.

 

“It's not easy to tell someone how you feel about them Duo.” Quatre said quietly as he watched Trowa show Bastian how to make Selwyn sit. “Especially when you are in love with them.”

 

“In love!?” Duo yelled. “That's an understatement when it comes to him. He practically leaves a river of drool whenever he sees Jacinda.”

 

“Once again Maxwell, you have proven that you are a true idiot.” Wufei said crossing his arms. “Winner is right, Siero is too nervous to admit his feelings. Jacinda is a very strong woman after all. With all of her fierce independence the likelihood that she accepts his hand is slim to none.”

 

“Love is a useless emotion anyway.” Heero answered. “All it does is cause trouble.”

 

Duo turned to Heero.

 

“And you would know?” He said. “Has Relena's not so secret signals finally sinking in? We all know she has a major thing for you.”

 

Heero grunted.

 

“That's her problem, not mine.” He said. “The feeling is not mutual and I could quite do without her constant interference.”

 

Duo put his hands on his hips.

 

“Okay, okay, point taken about stalker girl.” Duo said. “But come on Heero, love can be awesome sometimes.”

 

“And how would you know?” Heero asked not realizing that there was a twinge of jealousy in his voice. “He's been in love?”

 

Duo lay down on the grass and crossed his arms behind his head.

 

“Cuz I've had it!” He said. “Not with any girl, but from people who, ya know, act like family. That's why I fight ya know? To avenge the ones who loved me!”

 

He sighed.

 

“And ya know, when you think about it. Isn't that what we are all doing it for? Love of something or someone.”

Wufei's eyebrows shot up.

 

“Maxwell thinking philosophically?” He said astonished. “I think hell just froze over.”

 

Quatre just giggled.

 

“He is right though.” Quatre said as he sat down next to Duo. “We each have our own purpose for fighting this war and our purposes do have a strong emotion for it and love is an emotion. And no matter what our stance is on the war itself, we have to face the fact that we do have a strong attachment to our Gundams.”

 

“Hell yeah!” Duo exclaimed. “Deathsycthe is my best buddy!”

 

“And Sandrock means a lot to me.” Quatre agreed. “And Shenlong is like Wufei's spiritual guidance Nataku and Heavy Arms and Wing are Trowa and Heero's strongest allies. There may have been times we all didn't trust one another, but we trust our Gundams with our own lives. We would be lost without them during this war.”

 

Wufei crossed his arms.

 

“And I guess that's what Siero thinks about when it comes to Jacinda. How she feels about him I don't know.”

 

“She does have a strong feeling.” Quatre answered. “I can feel it occasionally, but there is something blocking it from coming to the surface. Something very deep, and sometimes…painful.”

 

“Sure it ain't just heartburn!” Duo said laughing.

 

Everyone gave Duo a good smack upside the head for that one.

 

Back inside, Siero found Jacinda in her bedroom sitting outside her closet with her head down.

 

“Jacinda!” He yelled running over to her. “Are you alright? What happened?”

 

Jacinda didn't speak as Siero put his hands on her shoulders.

 

“Speak to me Jacinda!”

 

Jacinda slowly lifted her head her eyes were full like they were brimming with tears she was fighting not to shed. He could feel her shaking in his hands.

 

“What's come over you?”

 

“It's…true.” She whispered.

 

“What's true?”

 

“The orphanage, the fire…Duo.”

 

Siero made a face.

 

“I don't understand.” He said.

 

Slowly Jacinda took the book that was on her knee and handed it to Siero. He began to read and felt himself overcome with horror as he read the passages inside.

 

“Jacinda.” He whispered. She gently took the diary and turned a few pages.

 

“Read it.” She said quietly.

 

Sunday night, May 15th AC 191

 

Dear Journal,

 

Sleep eludes me. All I see…little faces…skeletons...charred flesh. Oh dear God it's torturing me! I keep asking myself why, why, why we did this!? They were innocents in there. We could have gotten them out! It would have been easy…but…we just…I can't write it. It's not just the dead faces anymore; there was another face…a living one…so young…and now alone…and haunting me. We were finishing patrol…and…there...a boy. I could see him, even though he was trying to hide from us. I saw his tears, the look of anger and pain. He was shaking like a leaf…even the long braid at his back was bouncing with his grief. I wanted to call to him, to have him come out. I wanted him to attack me, to yell at me…he had every right to! I knew just by looking at him that he was one of them and in one instant we took his home! I watched as the boy finally had no choice but to leave. I wanted to follow him, to at least help him somehow, but I would be followed and he may be shot on the spot…and they would laugh. Just another piece of L2 trash they would say. How I loathe them…I loathe this whole war…it was lies…all lies!!! Now I have the blood of children and followers of God on my hands that will never come off!! I have to fix this…somehow…I have to…for that church…that orphanage…that boy.

 

Siero finished reading the passage then looked at Jacinda who sitting with her forehand in her hand.

 

“Jacinda?”

 

“It's him.” She whispered.

 

Siero gulped gently.

 

“No way…must it be a mistake.”

 

“No it isn't.” She said.

 

“But how can you be so sure…”

“I am!” She said angrily pointing at that page. “Read it Siero!!! Father Maxwell's Orphanage!! Burned to the ground! Boy with a braid...it's true he was the one…that…that…oh my God!!!”

 

She stifled a sob.

 

“Jacinda.”

 

“He was the boy that haunted his dreams.”

 

She began to cry.

 

“He…the man I loved…wanted to find.”

 

She let out a sob.

 

“It's Duo!” She said. “Duo is that boy!!”