Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Chocolate Kisses ❯ Misdirected Affections ( Chapter 5 )

Author: Hiriyou

Disclaimer: I may not own these boys but I sure as hell own this plot. Plagiarism will be dealt with!! BEWARE!

Warnings: AU, lemony goodness, sap, language, OOC, relena-bashing, hilde-bashing, OC, angst, and some slight violence... actually... it's more like a cat fight.

Pairings: 3x4x3, 1+2+1, 5+?? 13X1, 13X6

*All the boys and Hiriyou sitting around drinking tea from Quatre's tea set*

Hiriyou: I'm glad that we're all on friendly terms again, tying you all up all the time was getting a tad annoying.

Duo: Yeah we all thought so too, but... um.. Quatre...

Quatre: Yes?

Duo: Uh.. I can understand you having a tea set and all, I mean, you love the stuff, but...

Quatre: *tightly* Yes Duo, what is it?

Duo: *holding cup as far away as physically possible* Why does it have to be *pink*?

Wufei: For once, I agree with Maxwell.

*Heero tightens his grip around Duo's waist*

Everyone else: *raise eyebrow*

~~ scene change ~~

*** POV change ***

~*~* flashback *~*~

//thoughts//

*emphasis/actions*

Misdirected Affections

The braided man had no inkling of the inner torment his Japanese counterpart was going through, he was having his own inward battles to win.

//She needs to know. This is getting insane! First she's just accepting dates that were never asked for, but now she's coming to my house expecting them! Hilde has to be dealt with. I'll just explain things to her simply, then we'll both be mature adults and go our separate ways. Who knows? We could even become friends.// Duo was preceding towards the consumer's offices to have a chat with his best friend, Wufei.

//Yeah, he'll know what I should do.//

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I don't know what you should do."

Those seven words were cold water. How could he not know what to do? Wufei *always* knew what to do! "But Wu-man!" he whined, "I need your help!"

"Then why don't you tell Hilde the truth about the situation?" Wufei smirked in that `you-know-I'm-right-but-you-don't-want-to-admit-it' way. And he was right, that's what angered Duo.

"It's not like I've ever lied to the girl! After all..."

"`I run, I hide, but I never lie!'" the Chinese man imitated his friend perfectly, "Yes Maxwell I know. But omitting facts like you've done is just about the same as lying."

He hung his head in defeat. Wufei was right, it *was* basically the same, and Hilde deserved to know the *entire* truth. Who knows, maybe he was right earlier, maybe they would become friends.

"Ok Wu-man, I'll tell her the truth, "Duo received a glare,"the *whole* truth," the glare disappeared. "But one thing, ok?"

"What is it Maxwell?"

Putting on his puppy eyes #5, "Come with me?" he inquired meekly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The blue-haired bimbo sat on the stone park bench with her wide blue eyes, just waiting. She looked a lot like a vacant mannequin, just sitting there, staring into the abyss of space. Duo told her to meet him at one o'clock, it was now only thirty minutes until then, the German girl had already been sitting for thirty minutes, just in case he decided to be early.

//After all, he wouldn't want to miss our date!// her twisted, deluded mind offered to supply as to the reason for such unaccustomed early-birdness.

**************************************

Duo came walking adagio, chestnut head bowed, hands stuffed into his pockets. Wufei had speculated that it would probably be better if he trailed behind a little and was more of a spectator. Duo didn't know if he could really do this. Hilde's crush on him was serious, he knew that, and he really didn't *want* to hurt her, she was a nice girl.

"DUO!" A blue blurry missile came propelling itself at him at twice the speed of light.

**************************************

There he was! Her beautiful, wonderful, magnificent Duo! He did come! He loves her! Oh she knew it!

Her friends Noin and Sally had warned her that he didn't feel that way about her, but she proved them wrong! On Monday Duo would come to her station and she'd show them just how much he loved her! //Should we start trying for the kids now, or should I wait until he proposes?//

"DUO!" She couldn't wait for him to get to her, she would just have to go to him!

**************************************

//Shimatta!// the blue projectile barreled into his chest, strong arms encircled his chest and he found himself staring up into bright blue sky with a heavy weight on his chest, along with some very mocking snickers.

"Um... *snicker* Duo, *snicker* did you know you have a *snicker* girl on your chest?"

"Omae o korosu Wuffie," Duo aimed his best withering glare at his best friend before promptly shoving the offensive female off of his person.

"Duo?" same sentence, only this time it was filled with confusion instead of unadulterated excitement.

**************************************

"Duo?" why would he push her so? Didn't he love her? Shouldn't he be kissing her, proclaiming his undying love for he eternally while producing a diamond ring and asking her hand in marriage?!

Finally registering the fact of the Chinese man's presence, her mind went off on a whole other tangent. //Of course! My baby's shy! He doesn't want to look like a hopeless romantic in front of his macho friend! How kawaii!!//

Hoping to smile simperingly, the girl only managed to look like a lovesick puppy.

**************************************

It was now or never, Wufei gave him an uncharacteristic, encouraging smile, albeit it was a small one, but it did help Duo immensely.

"Uh.. Hilde listen, I called you and asked you here for a very specific reason," could he really do it? Could he really crush the girl's hopes? One look at the girls worshiping expression answered it for him. //HELL YES!//

**************************************

Dark blue eyes widened to their largest extent and then painfully attempted to go farther. Was he going to ask her to wed already? But that would ruin his shy air! //It must be something else.. But what?// her mind contemplated.

**************************************

Now that there was a spacious amount of distance between the two of them and Wufei was around to be witness in case something out of hand happened, Duo began on what promised to be a *long* discourse.

"Okay, here's how it is Hilde; I don't like you. Not in the `I don't like you as a person' way, I don't like you in the `I don't like you romantically' way.

"You see Hilde, I've never felt romantically for you, in any way, shape or form. And I do believe that you've gotten the wrong impression from my friendliness towards you," the truth was, Duo had never really been all that friendly towards the German or any other repugnant female that hung themselves over him. But he wasn't about to go speaking that to her! He was trying to be nice and considerate here!

**************************************

Like a lost little doggy, she just cocked her head to the side with furrowed brows at her soon-to-be-lover. His perfect lips were moving but the sounds he was making didn't make any sense to her. //Is he just playing?//

[No. Of course he's not playing, you idiot!]

//You again?! What are *you* doing back?//

[I've always *been* back.]

Hilde's blood ran cold. //W-w-what?? How is that possible?//

[Simple, the medicine didn't work.] If the voice had a body, Hilde was sure it would be smirking broadly at her foolishness.

//But the doctors....//

[Are idiots.] `It' interrupted.

A warm, concerned, cautious voice snapped Hilde back to reality and let her two voices duel with each other all they wanted to.

"Hilde? You okay?" awww! How sweet! He was worried about her! She knew he didn't mean any of that strange stuff he was saying!

"Hai Duo-chan, I'm fine," she smiled coyly and looked up, Duo had started backing off at `Duo-chan.'

**************************************

//OK, what the fuck is up with this girl?! I just told her I don't like her romantically and now she's acting like she's my girlfriend!// Duo was retreating at a cautious pace, he didn't want to startle her with any sudden moves.

**************************************

Inside the deranged girl's mind, a full out war was going on, nuclear missiles included.

//HE LOVES ME!//

[HE HATES YOU!]

//Shut up!//

[Why not kill yourself?! Then I'll have to!]

//NO!//

[YES!]

//Listen, this is nonsense! We're disembodied entities fighting around inside my head!//

[Uh, I thought *I* was the only disembodied being present, after all, we *are* fighting inside *your* head...]

Hilde could hear that damned disembodied thingy-mabob just laughing away at the error in her thoughts. So she retaliated.

//Listen you half-formed entity! I was *just* going to suggest that we settle this like adults!//

[Ok, now *you* listen you dim-witted, blue bimbo canine! I do *NOT* take orders from you! Now, how about we enlighten the heartbreaker Duo with all of this unidentifiable rage? Hmmm?]

Hilde considered it a moment, "Let's go."

**************************************

The Chinese man decided that Hilde really was nuts, she just stood there, staring into nothingness while Duo watched her antics, confusion written everywhere.

In half a blink, Hilde had gone from just about incapacitated to just about ready for incarceration. She growled so low it was practically primal!

His best friend was now, once again, on his back in the dirt with the girl on his chest, only this time the intentions weren't harmless.

**************************************

Breath stolen, ass hurting like hell, and harpy talons clawed at his beautiful face. Duo was pretty much screwed right now.

"Ack! Hilde! Mmphfff! Listen to me! Gahhhkk!" The man couldn't even say a full sentence without fists raining down on his face.

Now, he was stronger, much stronger than the girl pinning him down, but he didn't want to hurt her. //You may have no choice.// He really didn't like the fact that his subconsciousness was right any more than he liked the suggestion. Hurting people in general wasn't a pleasant thing to do, but especially when they were weaker than him and were simply confused.

Unfortunately, as his own voice stated, he had no choice but to force her to cease and desist. Hilde's legs were curled under his own, effectively pinning her to him. She sat on his abdomen, alternately punching his face, slamming entire arms and even chests into his sternum.

"You bastard! *punch* You're just a sick *punch* , twisted *punch* bastard! *slam* Enjoyed playing with me did you? *punch* Thought you could just play with me like a puppet and throw me away?!" the blue haired delusional emphasized the last part with a full bosom slam which resulted with her sobbing into Duo's shoulder, arms and legs still wrapped around his body.

**************************************

Wufei's eyes were saucers; It was hard for him to be surprised by anything, but this was a total shock to his system. //What the fuck is up with that bitch?!//

When he finally realized that he was just standing at the sidelines, allowing his best friend to be maimed, he went into action to assist in the repression of the dangerous, estranged girl.

"LET GO OF ME! Let go of me you! I'll kill you if you don't let go of me!!" shrieking in his ear, Chang Wufei was debating whom had the worse voice; Relena, or Hilde. //Relena. By far.// he shuddered unconsciously.

He held her fast, release could prove dire. Locking her arms behind her back he noticed his friend's struggles and threw the load of garbage to the side to help him rise.

**************************************

//No! How could I hurt him?! How could I touch my precious baby in harm?//

The voice in her mind sounded extremely smug, [Easily. That's how you could. I told you to and you did it. You really are pathetic.], a Cheshire cat was what it was, that's the only thing it *could* be!

//You! YOU! You made me hurt him!//

[No I didn't. I just told you to hurt him, you did it all by your little sadistic self.]

//Shut up! I wouldn't hurt Duo!//

[You just did] came the self-satisfied reply.

Hilde grew Speed Racer eyes gazing upon her beloved Duo having to lean on the Chinese man and panting with the simple exertion of becoming vertical.

**************************************

//That damn bitch! She must have bruised at least a couple of ribs, if not cracking one. Fuck that hurts! God, and I wanted to try and be friends with that sadistic psychopath?!// Harsh breaths of air attacked his abused chest and he had to set most of his body weight on his friend.

"Wu-man..." he coughed slightly at the pain in his heaving chest from talking.

"Hai Duo?" concerned was etched thickly in the other's voice, Duo was like a brother to him, albeit a noisy, annoying, younger brother, but a brother nonetheless.

"Can I kill her yet?" Duo's eyes flashed with antipathy, spoken words somber.

**************************************

"Hn. I think that maybe we should get you to the hospital soon," his words were punctuated by Duo collapsing back to the ground, clutching his abdomen in annoyance.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The hospital was cold and immaculate. Everything pristine and white, also, it was more boring than a ten hour lecture on the dental hygiene procedures of a goat.

BUZZ!!

Everybody at the nurses station winced at the familiar noise.

BUZZ!!

"Three guess as to who it is..." drawled the charge nurse..

BUZZ!!

"I only need one," replied another, "let's see... Patient 481?"

BUZZ!! BUZZ!!

One of the younger nurses covered her ears with her hands, "Argghh! Just make him stop!"

"I'll do it," the nurse that had guessed stood up and began to walk towards Duo's room. Hearing more than one `Good luck,' along the way.

Duo was pushing the Call button eagerly, like a child who just got a brand new toy. The aggravated hospital employee angrily snatched the buzzer out of his hands while glaring daggers at the man in the bed.

"This is not a toy!" she furiously swung the device in front of humbled violet eyes, making sure he knew just how much he was pissing off all of the workers.

Nearing the end of her tirade, the American heard a distinct cough, politely issued, and very overlooked by the overworked, harassed, fired up nurse.

"Duo?"

Two heads swivelled at the sound of the voice.

"Heero! What are you doing here?" Duo sounded genuinely confused as to the reasons for the unpredicted, but still very welcome, visitor.

Nervousness played on the Japanese man's face, "Wufei called me, told me you were in the hospital."

**************************************

It was true, the Chinese man had called him, but only to ask him if he could give him a lift home. Duo had no living family, so he had Wufei down as his next of kin and now that the paperwork was finished, he had wanted to leave.

Heero really couldn't blame him, he loathed hospitals as well. They always reminded him of the night his parents crashed, forcing him to find a place to live, forcing him to Treize.

Shivers ran down his spine as he remembered that night painfully.

All the needles sticking out of their limp forms, the gradual weakening of the heart monitors, and the finality of everything when people came to take them to the morgue. He had stayed in their room the entire time, never wanting to leave, never wanting to believe it's truth, then Treize stepped in and Heero made the worst decision of his young life.

When he stood witness to the venerable nurse brandishing the ugly machine in front of the traumatized American, he could only but breathe a sigh of relief. In his thoughts only would he truly admit his axenic terror, but he was frightened that he would relieve the past. But he needn't have worried, Duo was fine, and bored... A bored Duo was a bad thing... As all of the current or temporary residents of Swedish Medical Center could testify to.

"How are you feeling," he implored, desperately hoping to divert his attention to the angel lying hurt in the crisp white hospital bed.

"Oh, I'm doing pretty good, I'm just bored out of my MIND!" that perfect mouth opened wide at the last word, practically inviting Heero for a taste.

//Stop that! Stop thinking like that! Bad Heero!// mentally slapping himself quite a few times for his vulgar thoughts, he cocked his head, trying to think of a way to...

"I think I know a way to alleviate your situation."

"Huh?" with an eyebrow quirked, he looked too much like a hippie you tried to explain quantum physics to.

A tiny, upward pull tugged at his lips as he riposted, "Follow me."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The police officers pulled up to the glass doors of the medical building with two men in the back seat. One was grinning enough to split his head in two, the other glared at anyone who dared to look twice at them in their current state.

Charge Nurse Matilda came out of the infirmary at the discovered locations of the missing delinquents. In all truths, the boys hadn't done anything serious, but still! They were in her care and up until this day she hadn't lost a patient. Damn those brats for ruining her seventeen year long record!

"Yes thank you officers, we really appreciate you bringing them back to us," she never let her cold grey eyes waver from their hunched over forms.

"`S no trouble at all Matilda," the officer tipped his cap at the hag of a woman then sauntered over in all his artificial authority glamour, and opened the door for the punks, "You two are pretty lucky that I'm not taking ya down to the station with me!" tipping his cap once more at the nurse, "Matilda."

"Sergeant Bauga," nodding, she grappled the arms of both boys and literally dragged them back into the hospital.

**************************************

Released from confines of handcuffs and now listening to the endless diatribe from the grizzled old witch-bitch of a nurse, Duo, miraculously, became bored, once again.

//Wonder if Heero wouldn't be too adamant against helping to relieve some of this boredom.// the braided man mused, then snapped himself from the coarse thoughts and into reality.

"And now I'll just go and get the injection and you'll be all set to leave Mr. Maxwell."

"Nani? I'm sorry, what was that you said?" scratching the back of his head sheepishly, Duo glanced around, hoping there were witnesses if he was attacked for a second time in two days.

Glaring flaming daggers at the American, the nurse repeated herself, something she hated terribly! "I *said* `We've checked you for rabies because of the deep cut in your right shoulder, and so, we will have to administer to you an anti-rabies injection."

A look of utter horror crossed the violet-eyed American's face before he became a projectile aimed at the nearest exit. A pair of bulky orderlies latched onto an arm each and then dragged the very resistant man into his room. Screaming could be heard until they shoved his bags at him and sent him limping all the way home.

TBC............

PLEASE REVIEW!

Notes: If you're wondering why Duo was screaming so much, do you want to know where they put anti-rabies shots? They stick them in your butt! Ouch! >.<

Hehe... I made Hilde a crazed stalking bitch.... okay, so I really did nothing at all to change her personality. You can totally tell I hate her and Relena.. Yeah, I do. ^_^ 1x2/2x1 forever!

I made this chapter extra-long for two reasons: 1] I wanted to make up for the shortened chapter last time. And 2] I couldn't stop writing! Forgive me for stringing onto a creative current!